Like you, I was looking for a lifestyle and while what I was doing would have been okay, I was eating all the time it seemed, so I was looking for something different.
I found primal, and started increasing the fat, lower the carbs. That helped me to get a good grip on my hunger. To understand hunger. It helped me to practice fasting. I was getting full on less food. But as the fat went up, the weight loss went down. It didnt matter where my calories were, or where my carbs were. My protein was always pretty consistent. But my pattern definitely shows with each increase in fat, weight loss slowed until finally at about 75% fat, it actually was a weight gain and my fasting would take it back off. My calories were at a deficit. Very few 20%.
But you said you have tried to lower fat, so I don't know. I think 30% up to 40 maybe, is where I need to be for weight loss. And I think 60-70% will be good for maintenance.
What finally gave me the courage to go back to what was working, when most everyone else was having great success with high fat/low carbs, was I re-read this page. I had read it before, but it did not sink in.
Perfect Health Diet: Weight Loss Version | Perfect Health Diet
And it may all just be a co-inky dink also. I have only recently converted back, so time will tell for sure, but so far, I have lost more weight since Oct 3 than I have in the last 3 months combined.