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Girlfriend is Ruining my Primal

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  • #31
    I admit I only skimmed the replies but why can't he just cook his own dang meals?
    carl's cave

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    • #32
      oh god
      Female, age 51, 5' 9"
      SW - 183 (Jan 22, 2012), CW - 159, GW - healthy.

      Met my 2012 goals by losing 24 pounds.
      2013 goals are to get fit and strong!

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      • #33
        Cry me a river. You don't like what is cooked, make it yourself. If you aren't where you want to be with your body, straighten up and fly right.
        "The problem with quoting someone on the Internet is, you never know if it's legit" - Abraham Lincoln

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        • #34
          Thanks for the responses ("don't breed" - dad/mum is that you?? ). It seems the consensus is to take responsibility for my own meals, my girlfriend's feelings be damned.

          FWIW I had success on the 4 hour body diet, going from 165 to 154 (9% body fat), with 150 the goal I never quite reached. I started working my current job and moved in with my girlfriend about 12 months ago and slowly expanded to 169 (17% body fat). I'm still getting the same amount of exercise but sitting on my ass 10-14 hours a day probably isn't helping. It's very possibly not the dinners my gf is cooking but I wanted to rule this out completely before I look at the other factors.

          I'll break the news to her tonight. Thanks everyone who commented.

          RC

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          • #35
            Originally posted by randomcow View Post
            Thanks for the responses ("don't breed" - dad/mum is that you?? ). It seems the consensus is to take responsibility for my own meals, my girlfriend's feelings be damned.

            FWIW I had success on the 4 hour body diet, going from 165 to 154 (9% body fat), with 150 the goal I never quite reached. I started working my current job and moved in with my girlfriend about 12 months ago and slowly expanded to 169 (17% body fat). I'm still getting the same amount of exercise but sitting on my ass 10-14 hours a day probably isn't helping. It's very possibly not the dinners my gf is cooking but I wanted to rule this out completely before I look at the other factors.

            I'll break the news to her tonight. Thanks everyone who commented.

            RC
            My wife is Norwegian. I simply told her jokes for 10 minutes, then I explained to her the thrust of what I would be trying to accomplish, gave her Mark's cookbooks, whispered a filthy thing or 2 in her ear and let her natural love of cooking take it's course.

            Don't try to argue with logic. Change her mood, change her opinion.

            See if there's not that particular softspot you can use to change her mood.

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            • #36
              Originally posted by Warmbear View Post
              I know, the idea of a woman wishing to serve her man is repugnant to western attitudes but I would kill for a wife that felt that way.
              Clearly it's not repugnant enough.

              Do you not understand how offensive and fucked up that is? What if I rephrase it? "I know, the idea of owning black slaves is repugnant to western attitudes but I would kill to have a willing black slave." Do you see it now?

              _-J o u r n a l_--------- ---- ---- --- --- -- -- -

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              • #37
                Originally posted by Gravyboat View Post
                Clearly it's not repugnant enough.

                Do you not understand how offensive and fucked up that is? What if I rephrase it? "I know, the idea of owning black slaves is repugnant to western attitudes but I would kill to have a willing black slave." Do you see it now?
                The secret to keeping a man is very, very simple.

                A) Make a good home for him.

                B) Cook nice things.

                C) Keep him laid like a tile.

                There, I just saved you a decade of confusion.

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                • #38
                  Legbiter, you're a genius. Start a blog, give lessons!

                  This is clearly a hot topic. I've been having some marital stress due to the fact that my wife sees me as some kind of "born again Primal" nut who won't have it any other way. I do most the cooking, and while the grains and sweets consumption has gone down for her and the kids, they haven't disappeared. I don't know how we're going to get to the next level. They can all see how much fitter and happier I am, but I'm not going to be some kind of dictator and demand they throw away the croissants...so there's this background tension, and if they go to the ice cream place they come back kinda looking guilty.

                  I think I'd tell Randomcow what I think I need to do: just level with her, say look, this is important to me, and I want to be healthy and live in a way I believe I'm meant to live. I can love you and not eat the grains and sugar, OK? Please don't take it as a judgement on you, your culture, or your worth to me. And yes, Randoncow, get in the kitchen and get some skillz.

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                  • #39
                    Originally posted by Legbiter View Post
                    The secret to keeping a man is very, very simple.

                    A) Make a good home for him.

                    B) Cook nice things.

                    C) Keep him laid like a tile.

                    There, I just saved you a decade of confusion.
                    I have absolutely no desire to "keep a man". Enjoy your indentured servitude, though.

                    _-J o u r n a l_--------- ---- ---- --- --- -- -- -

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                    • #40
                      Originally posted by Gravyboat View Post
                      I have absolutely no desire to "keep a man". Enjoy your indentured servitude, though.

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                      • #41
                        Additional points:

                        - yes, you are correct that the Japanese diet is not what it used to be, and there is a "fat wave" sweeping the nation. Having said that, my girlfriend's cooking is healthy, albeit it contains salad oil, rice/noodles and sugar/mirin.

                        - I may have used poetic license on the translation a little. But the fact that she feels pressure from not contributing to the household is true. I am demanding in response to the way she is wired. It might seem a little strange to the feminist crowd but all signs point to her being satisfied with the situation.

                        - English is my native language. However seven years in Japan will change anyone.

                        - Lots of different personalities on this site, and I honestly appreciate all the replies.

                        - Sorry for the cross posts. At work, trying to type this up, and it took a little longer than I thought it would.

                        RC

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                        • #42
                          Originally posted by chaohinon
                          you're both idiots. Don't breed.
                          lmfao
                          People too weak to follow their own dreams will always try to discourage others.

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                          • #43
                            Originally posted by Gravyboat View Post
                            Clearly it's not repugnant enough.

                            Do you not understand how offensive and fucked up that is?

                            As a woman who's been married nearly 30 years ... NO, I don't see how "fucked up" that thought it.

                            I've also never had to lose 100+ pounds ... maybe "fucked up" females stay thinner???

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                            • #44
                              Originally posted by MrsC View Post
                              As a woman who's been married nearly 30 years ... NO, I don't see how "fucked up" that thought it.

                              I've also never had to lose 100+ pounds ... maybe "fucked up" females stay thinner???
                              huh?
                              Female, age 51, 5' 9"
                              SW - 183 (Jan 22, 2012), CW - 159, GW - healthy.

                              Met my 2012 goals by losing 24 pounds.
                              2013 goals are to get fit and strong!

                              Comment


                              • #45
                                Originally posted by MrsC View Post
                                As a woman who's been married nearly 30 years ... NO, I don't see how "fucked up" that thought it.

                                I've also never had to lose 100+ pounds ... maybe "fucked up" females stay thinner???
                                Wow... completely uncalled for.

                                I've been with my husband 15 years... he prefers me VERY independent.
                                As I prefer him.
                                I don't do things to KEEP him.
                                We are friends and lovers and do things for each other because they make both of us happy... not as a form or trade.

                                OTOH, if the OP's gf does that stuff because it makes her happy, great... but it's not necessary in order to have a healthy relationship.
                                Different strokes for different folks.

                                But WISHing for absolute subservience from a person is weird.
                                And I also equate the WISH for a completely subservient partner with some seriously messed up issues.


                                To top it off... Personal jabs about weight... in a health and weight loss forum?1
                                Shows a rather 'fucked up' picture of your personality.
                                A very, very, ugly picture.
                                “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”
                                ~Friedrich Nietzsche
                                And that's why I'm here eating HFLC Primal/Paleo.

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