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Is it awkward when you go out to eat or go over to friend's house to eat?

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  • #16
    yo grumpycakes, post a funny "GADSIE THREAD" meme again
    well then

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    • #17
      Originally posted by jimhensen View Post
      What if your friend invites you over and makes a pasta dish? Do you have to do all sorts of special requests when you are at a restaurant? Do you just suck it up and eat un primal on occasion or do you just turn down the food for some random reason that is either a lie or that the other people there won't understand or agree with?
      This is why the "80/20 rule" exists. Unless you have celiac, or another autoimmune disorder or allergy where certain foods are severely, directly harmful, it's generally about doing the best you can and knowing that there are times when you can let go and enjoy yourself.

      When you're at a restaurant, there are usually decent options you can choose, even if nothing is "perfect". If you avoid the free bread before the meal, and avoid breaded/deep-fried foods and unknown salad dressings you're off to a pretty good start. When invited to a friend's house - I'd say that's when you just chalk it up to your 20%(or whatever your personal non-paleo/primal fraction is) and enjoy the meal.*

      *unless you have an actual allergy/intolerance/autoimmune isssue

      Originally posted by Gadsie View Post
      Not if you're invited for pizza 3x a week
      IMO, ordering out or being at a restaurant is totally different. If you're getting food with friends from a restaurant, picking a place that has decent options(or choosing one from the menu - some pizza places have decent antipasto salads) isn't unreasonable, and you should be able to work with your friends on that. Encourage a little variety in the choices, if you can. I've pushed back a bit on co-workers for suggesting a pizza place for lunch and suggested an alternative venue before, and it's been fine, no issue.

      Personally, being invited to dinner for home cooking is exactly what the 80/20 rule was intended for, as you want to be able to enjoy the food and company and not make a big deal of things that, in the grand scheme of things, are pretty minor. I just attend and enjoy.
      Last edited by jsa23; 06-09-2012, 07:45 AM.

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      • #18
        Originally posted by Gadsie View Post
        yo grumpycakes, post a funny "GADSIE THREAD" meme again
        example 1

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        • #19
          For me, it's not a problem at all. I might get a bit of constipation but I don't think that's a big deal.

          At restaurants, it's no big deal. 9 times out of 10, I can find something primal on the menu. When I can't, I eat what looks/reads decent in the moment, and I don't worry about it.

          For going to others homes, I eat. Since I don't have any allergies or special considerations (and a lot of people do, and a lot of hosts here try really hard to make sure there's something that those folks can eat), I eat what is created. People work hard and are offering their best effort. Who am I to complain about that? It's generous.

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          • #20
            I haven't had a problem with this. Most people around here grill meat when they have guests. I try to go to steakhouses, Thai, and Jack's Urban Eats is good too.

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            • #21
              I have celiac which obviously means no (wheat) pasta, but as long as it's gluten-free, I'm not going to make a fuss. For example, friends who are a vegetarian couple invited us over the other week and made a lovely chickpea and vegetable casserole. I certainly did not smash the dish screaming "Why do you feed me legumes? Did you even soak these properly?!" No, I ate it and enjoyed it because it was delicious and sharing food with friends is more important to me than primal purity. Same thing with going to dinner with my brother, who is allergic to nightshades--we go for sushi at a place that offers gluten-free tamari for celiacs, and we happily chow down on a million different kinds of rolls. Or when my friend specially made a gluten-free black forest cake for me, with real kirsch and sour cherries and amazing mocha cream, there was no way I was going to refuse something made so lovingly and with a thought to whether I could safely eat it.

              I'm comfortable with this because I keep the foods I cook at home pretty strictly primal/paleo, so when I go out, I have room in my 80/20 to enjoy things that are not strictly primal. Most of the places I go to have celiac menus that offer some pretty primal choices anyhow and are focused on local, organic foods (so the chicken and eggs will be for-real free range, the pork pastured, and the beef grassfed).

              We're not all orthorexic around here. Some of us have to be much more careful on our indulgences (me with gluten, or someone like naiadknight with seed oils, for example), but within those limits, you can still enjoy food and not be an ass to your friends.
              “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

              Owly's Journal

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              • #22
                I will eat if there is something I can eat (veggie trays, olives, roast chicken) and skip the rest. If I'm at a restaurant that has absolutely no primal option, I have water. IF is always an option.

                Now, for the social side of things. Those that I'm closest with (Family, friends, coworkers) adjusted very quickly to me joining them at a restaurant table and eating nothing. They were concerned at first, but if they love and/or respect you, then they will adjust. It isn't like I was asking anyone to not eat or to eat something else. If they just can't cope with it, then they have a problem they need to address.

                Good luck! This is one of the biggest hurdles to going primal.

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                • #23
                  Originally posted by Grumpycakes View Post
                  I eat whatever is served because it's polite and a meal of pasta once in a while matters less than a fart in a hurricane.
                  Yep.

                  A restaurant is different; you have some control. Even if you go for pizza with friends, if you indulge in cheese occasionally, all you have to do is pick the toppings off the crust and eat them. If friends don't understand or appreciate, hang out with them at non-food venues.
                  "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                  B*tch-lite

                  Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

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                  • #24
                    Originally posted by jimhensen View Post
                    What if your friend invites you over and makes a pasta dish? Do you have to do all sorts of special requests when you are at a restaurant? Do you just suck it up and eat un primal on occasion or do you just turn down the food for some random reason that is either a lie or that the other people there won't understand or agree with?
                    My friends don't actually know what kind of food I eat but they know that I generally avoid heavily processed foods. If I go to a restaurant I get a salad or something and just accept that there might be some seed oil, legumes, or sometimes grain-fed meat in it but I wouldn't purposely order something that obviously has bread or huge amounts of sugar or PUFAs. If I go to a friend's house then I try to avoid eating there if I can, but when I've been eating primal longer then I'll probably relax a bit. I don't ever ask anyone to make special food for me though. In theory I'm not against occasionally eating an unhealthy meal but when it comes to actually eating it, I feel like it would somehow ruin my life, and I know that sounds stupid but I'm sure it's just a temporary thing because I'm still sort of adjusting and I don't know if I can trust myself not to turn one meal into one day or one week.

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                    • #25
                      Restaurants are pretty easy - choose a quality one and enjoy the food.
                      OH is wheat sensitive so that is an issue at friends. TBH once you get to a certain age most people I see start to move away from bland pasta and tend to cook more flavourful meals so I don't see it as much as an issues. So other than wheat I would just chow down.
                      Eating primal is not a diet, it is a way of life.
                      PS
                      Don't forget to play!

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                      • #26
                        It usually goes something like this, which could explain why I don't get invited over for dinner much . . .

                        Buy house, Demolish house, Build house.

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                        • #27
                          Originally posted by Blackcatbone View Post
                          It usually goes something like this, which could explain why I don't get invited over for dinner much . . .

                          very very funny....

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                          • #28
                            Priceless!
                            "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                            B*tch-lite

                            Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              Originally posted by jimhensen View Post
                              What if your friend invites you over and makes a pasta dish? Do you have to do all sorts of special requests when you are at a restaurant? Do you just suck it up and eat un primal on occasion or do you just turn down the food for some random reason that is either a lie or that the other people there won't understand or agree with?
                              I don't lie nor do I care what they agree with. I feel no need or compulsion to explain myself to anyone. If I want my diet to be made up entirely of Skittles then that's nobodies business, but mine.....so why on earth would I feel the need to explain myself for eating primarily meat and vegetables?

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                              • #30
                                When I am eating with friends I bring 'emergency' protein. There is always salad and usually another vegetable I can eat. If the main dish is something like pasta, I just pull out my protein without comment, put it on my plate, and eat it. I always make sure to compliment how good their dish looks/smells. Things that work well for easy transport and non-obtrusiveness are rotisserie chicken legs, and home-made beef patties/meatballs. Good warm or cold.
                                Also, I ask if I can bring something-and then bring something that works for me.
                                I have learned that I cannot afford to take 'just one taste'.
                                Maybe someday.
                                Not now.

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