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i need help with my teen daughter!

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  • i need help with my teen daughter!

    I have been primal for 5 weeks and have realized amazing changes. My 12 year old daughter has been primal for 3 weeks. She is freaking out as she has gained two pounds. Please give me some advice because I am not sure what is going on. The hormones are in full bloom (lucky us) and she is a club soccer player. I do not think exercise a concern. Please let me know if we are not being patient, is it different with a developing girl, and so on. I truly appreciate your advice and thoughts. Please help!

  • #2
    Tell her to grow up about the weight gain. Weight is just a number until it dives into the realm of fat gain, and for a girl her age and activity level... there's little point freaking out about two pounds.
    Are you a college student, trying to navigate college while being Primal? Do you know any other PB college students on a tight budget? Heck, for that matter, are YOU trying to live Primal on a budget? Enroll at Primal University!

    For after all what is man in nature? A nothing in relation to infinity, all in relation to nothing, a central point between nothing and all and infinitely far from understanding either.
    -- Blaise Pascal

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    • #3
      I think it is unrealistic to think that your daughter is "going primal" because you are, if that is indeed your thought. She's probably doing considerable carbs outside the house. Of course, if going PB is her idea, then that might be wrong. In any event, two pounds is within the weight of water drunk recently (a pint's a pound the world around, and so on). If that's all that is freaking her out, have her weigh herself before breakfast. She'll probably be back where she was.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Galeldor View Post
        Please give me some advice because I am not sure what is going on.
        It's possible that your 12 year old daughter might still be growing.
        You lousy kids! Get off my savannah!

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        • #5
          I'd take away the scale. I know I don't want my daughter to ever get focuses on a number on the scale, especially when she's still growing and developing. She should be focused on her game, her energy levels, and how she feels. Make sure she sees pictures of strong, athletic women, so she understands what "healthy" looks like. Let her know why you eat the way you do, but don't make it about weight. It should be about health, strength, being able to play hard and enjoying life. She needs to understand that this is not a diet.

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          • #6
            She's still growing, lol!

            I had my biggest growth spurt at 13.

            Tell her to chill and get rid of the scale (if you have one.)
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            • #7
              I grew from 5' 7" to 5' 11" between the ages of 12 and 14, the scale shouldn't matter at that age.
              My Primal Journal with lots of food pr0n

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              • #8
                If she's primal at home and carbing at school or behind your back that would certainly explain the rapid weight gain... And female cyclical weight fluctuations?

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                • #9
                  Well, she can either realize that two pounds isn't the end of the world (I can fluctuate two pounds in a day, easily), or she can give into her fears and go back to her previous eating habits. It can be a very difficult lifestyle to wrap one's head around, and for a hormonal teenage girl, I would not try to force her into it or become disappointed in her if she doesn't want to continue right now.

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                  • #10
                    Under the age of 18, you only need to be seeing a scale at the doctors office. JMO.

                    She could be gaining muscle (especially with all that great soccer cardio)
                    --Trish (Bork)
                    TROPICAL TRADITIONS REFERRAL # 7625207
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                    • #11
                      A 12 year old SHOULD be gaining weight. She's still growing! And two pounds? As your mother, I think you should encourage a body image that does not revolve around the scale of all things.

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                      • #12
                        She's 12. I don't know what kinds of peer or other pressure she is under but unless she has health issues then, seriously, what messages is she getting about body image and where is she getting them? Why is a 12 year old jumping on the scales?

                        She needs to grow and get some curves and that means she will need to put on some weight. I would suggest that you model how to keep perspective and take charge by getting her away from the scales.
                        Evolutionary. Ideology that fits biology

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                        • #13
                          Parents don't "model" anything for teenagers. Teens take their ideas about bodies and everything else from their peers, and parents can't change them. Teens "jump on the scales" because that is what all their friends do. Don't blame the parents! If you have teenagers, you will understand -- the idea that you as their parent can change their ideas about what body is "hot" or attractive or cool or whatever is laughable. They're not listening to you at that age, and if they ever do again, it'll be sometime after 25.

                          On the other hand, you can throw out the scale.
                          Last edited by bookstorecowboy; 05-14-2011, 05:50 PM. Reason: Clarity

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by bookstorecowboy View Post
                            They take their ideas about bodies from their peers, and parents can't change them. The "jump on the scales" because that is what all their friends do. Don't blame the parents! If you have teenagers, you will understand -- the idea that you as their parent can change their ideas about what body is "hot" or attractive or cool or whatever is laughable. They're not listening to you at that age, and if they ever do again, it'll be sometime after 25.

                            On the other hand, you can throw out the scale.
                            I was just going to type the same thing lol. I have a 12 year old as well and I model and healthy image pretty damn good IMO. I`m not fixated on the scale or on numbers and I`m not constantly talking to her about weight and body image and all the stuff the media and peers are constantly attacking our poor young ladies with. I am constantly talking about nutrition and health and how you feel and how smart she is and beautiful she is just by being her and all the positive things. It is the media and peers who do alot of these things to our youth;it`s not always the mom. My daughter gets on the scale. I don`t think she`s seen me on a scale more than a handful of times in her 12 years. To the OP; if it sems like a chronic issue I would get rid of the scale but don`t make a huge deal of it.....just let it disappear and then when she ask you can just say you decided it wasn`t needed in the house because life`s not about numbers on a scale. Talk to her about healthy self esteem issues and beauty doesn`t come in numbers;stuff like that. Good luck. Tween girls are a challenge sometimes. As everyone else is saying she should be gaining weight cuz she`s growing. Maybe you can help her see the light that way.
                            Last edited by pattyd; 05-14-2011, 05:31 PM.
                            "Anxiety is a sign of spiritual insecurity"
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                            • #15
                              You've obviously taken my comments the wrong way, apologies.

                              I've raised 3 girls and we tended to talk about how friends at school looked at weight and body image and what was reasonable and healthy for us. I think it's just a matter of seizing the chance when you can and not pushing the issue.

                              Parents do model both behaviours and attitudes - kids notice and they are quick to point out hypocritical behaviours too.
                              Evolutionary. Ideology that fits biology

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