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  • Introducing Spouse to Veggies

    My non-primal spouse was prescribed a statin medication yesterday - he's soon to be 42 years old, does not exercise, and eats SAD most of the time, usually even refusing my primal dinners (unless it's steak, hamburger, or bacon, no vegetables and his own added grains). He had said prior to going to the doctor that he would be perfectly happy to take a pill to help his cholesterol as long as he could continue with his current lifestyle. That is, until he went to the pharmacy to have his prescription filled and discovered that the insurance co-pay was $40/month basically for the rest of his life. Interestingly, this is the only thing that has led to him even considering a lifestyle change. He won't read anything about diet/nutrition/exercise, and doesn't believe me paraphrasing Mark, Gary Taubes, etc, because it's not what he hears on television.

    So, I have my work cut out for me, but at least he is now a bit more open. He agreed to start walking the dog 3 days a week in order to begin to get some exercise. He has also agreed to do away with grains for dinner only (Victory!!). The hard part is the diet-the only veggies (and I use the term loosely) he will eat are green beans, peas, corn, and potatoes. Oh, and succotash. Spinach sauteed in bacon grease with garlic and bacon pieces does not even interest him, as hard as that is to believe!

    I have always loved vegetables, and so I don't know where to begin for him. What are some other veggies or ways to prepare them that helped those of your who are non-veggie lovers ease into primal? Any other advice for how to help him is most welcome, too.
    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread51572.html

  • #2
    he doesn't like vegetables (who doesn't like spinach cooked with bacon?) or he doesn't want vegetables? at 42, maybe it's just time for him to start eating sensibly. if i'm not mistaken, statins are meant to complement diet and exercise...not replace them. sounds to me like he needs to man up and eat his greens like his grandmother told him to.
    http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread60178.html

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    • #3
      I'm pretty sure that most cholesterol-lowering meds aren't actually shown to reduce the likelihood of a heart attack. Is there any way you could talk to your doctor and have him discuss this with your husband? Because it's pretty impossible to make someone change if they don't want to, but he should at least be completely aware that a pill will NOT allow him to skate through life with a crappy diet and no consequences. It sounds like you have had some small victories. Savor those and don't push too hard, or else you'll just convince him that nothing he does is good enough for you, so why bother doing anything (my mom is this same way).

      Oh, and I don't like spinach cooked with bacon... I pretty much only eat cooked spinach when it's mixed in with scrambled eggs, garlic, and some parmesan cheese. Otherwise, I prefer kale.

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      • #4
        These drugs actually can increase your chances of a stroke or heart attack. They have no place in a healthy diet/lifestyle.

        It simply amazes me how little so many poeple care about their own health and wellbeing. They care more about their car or their bank account!! Then they cry why me when it all comes crashing down on them much too soon in life. It's then too late and they piss and moan that life sucks and they got a bum wrap etc. etc.

        There are many many variables in this life for each of us and no gaurantees of anything. But to have a complete disregard or value in your own wellness is complete and utter irresponsibility. To think that you can take a simple pill and all will be alright is beyond idiotic.

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        • #5
          It sounds just by reading it that you have a Mommy/Son situation going on instead of Man/Wife. Doesn't mean it's that way, just sounds that way reading what you wrote. A grown man should take his health more serious on his own and not need his wife to badger him into it.
          How can you not like vegetables???? To me that's like someone saying they don't like dogs! Garlic butter over Asparagus is like crack to me.
          One thing I like about my life now since going Primal...walks feel more fun. I don't feel the constant pressure to MOVE MOVE MOVE FAST FAST FASTER. My dogs don't have to run along with me, they can stop and smell things. Maybe if you focus on the being together aspect of it, it won't feel like such a chore to him.
          My Dad was a lot like your husband, never wanted to exercise, so I got him a Wii. He's playing that thing a couple hours a day now (and he's almost 65).
          So it's a start! My husband and I have a lot of fun boxing, skiing or dancing on Wii. That is the kind of exercise that feels like fun, not just doing it because you have to. Shovelglove is another one for me that I just really enjoy doing and it doesn't take long before I'm sweating. Are there things like that for him that would be fun and physical?
          For vegetables...he doesn't even like salads?

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          • #6
            Not liking vegetables is no reason not to eat them. I should know. I don't like vegetables. Tough. They only way to learn to like them is to eat them. If he is truly worried about his health, he would begin eating better. If he's not interested in his health, he is not going to. One way or another, it's not your job to pressure him. Tell him to grow up, put his big boy pants on and eat his damn vegetables. I have to allow my husband to eat the crap he wants to, even though I know it's going to kill him. I can't make him do anything. If he cares about living a long healthy life, and if he truly loves you, he'll change his behavior. If not, well, you'll be old and and kicking ass, and he'll be dead.


            Crap! I'm An Adult!

            My Primal Journal

            http://badquaker.com <--- podcast I'm a part of. Check it out if you like anarchy, geekiness and random ramblings.

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            • #7
              My husband grew up eating canned green beans, canned corn, and canned peas. About the only other veggies he might consume would be in a salad COVERED with major amounts of sweet dressing, onions or peppers cooked in other dishes, and carrots. Product of growing up in the south and living with a non cooking parent a lot.

              It has taken years, but here are a few of the things he has decided are 'good':
              -Grilled asparagus (olive oil, salt, pepper)
              -Just about any salad with the veggies chopped up small (I cut up cucumber, colored peppers, zuch, squash, jicima, things like that)
              -Cut up veggies in scrambled eggs
              -Spaghetti squash
              -Raw veggie snacks with some sort of dip
              -Stir fried veggies and meat (prefers them julianned pretty thin)
              -Fresh green beans cooked down with onions and bacon (yes, they are technically beans, but we get them free in the summer a lot)
              -Sliced cabbage sauteed in bacon grease (just salt, pepper, and I add back in the bacon crumbles before serving)
              -Coleslaw

              He has 'accepted' on occasion some other grilled veggies, roasted acorn squash, and things like goulash and zucchini lasagna I make. He is still mixed on my cauliflower rice....if I make it like 'fried rice' with eggs and my soy sauce substitute, and then cover it in stir fry, he doesn't mind it.

              For him, a lot of times it is getting him over the hump of just TRYING it with an open mind. Thinly slicing veggies and using a lot of a favorite 'sauce' in a dish can usually get him to taste test it. Some things he prefers raw, some cooked. Usually he likes them a bit on the very cooked side.....something lightly roasted like a kabob won't do it. The waitress at a steak restaurant the other day convinced him to try their creamed spinach, and he LOVED it, so I am now researching similar recipes (this one included LOTS of bacon and other things). He has also gotten over his fear of cooked mushrooms, so happy to be able to add those into more dishes lately.

              I think it is all really frikken silly he is so weird about veggies, but what do I do. He is on board with being more primal, but a lot of times since he has removed grains and starches.....he ends up just serving the meat and refusing the veggie side or just taking a bite or two. Its not like he complains, he just skips whatever. Its more ME trying to help him get more variety. I make more meat a lot of times to account for this, and usually if all else fails I can always fall back on a salad for him. His dressing preferences are still questionable, but I am taking what I can get at this point.

              I do feel like his mother on occasion, but frankly if I was his mother I would never be pushing him at all, he would still be eating canned green beans! Food is a touchy subject in our house since I went primal for medical reasons that he does not have, so I focus on the positives, try new recipes, and know that one day when I have a kid I will be more prepared!!! LOL
              Erin
              Daily Vlogs
              Primal Pets Blog

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              • #8
                To be honest, the primal diet is what you don't eat more than what you do eat. Eliminate all non-primal foods. Then, you can deal with all the other problems.

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                • #9
                  First thought: take the pressure off - getting him to eat healthily is not your job. If you can help, good for you. But you should in no way feel responsible.
                  Second thought: look for the advice given to mothers trying to switch small children to Primal - some people make disguising vegetables an art form. Unfortunately all I remember from this is chopped vegetables in bolognese-style sauce, but that's a start.

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                  • #10
                    Hello Tawny- He definitely needs to check out Dr. Davis' site. He's a cardiologist who is extremely knowledgeable about the harming affects of SAD.

                    Especially since he's now on a statin , which is cardiology SOP.

                    Dr. Davis' site
                    Self-realization. I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "... I drank what?"

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                    • #11
                      Wow, some interesting responses. I guess I didn't make it clear that the cost of the medication has resulted in my husband being more open to trying lifestyle changes...I'm not sure what in my original post suggested that I was constantly badgering him about eating and that we had mommy/son issues...as the food shopper and primary food preparer, I'm looking for ideas to help him transition. He doesn't like to try new things, and I haven't forced it on him, I've gone about my way with primal and he's gone about his with SAD. It's not really a point a contention between us, though of course I have secretly, and even sometimes openly, wished he would make better choices. I'm very happy that he's more open to looking at alternatives to medication and I'm looking for ways to make this transition easier for him. Until he was hit with the price of the medication, he wasn't ready to make a change, now he is.

                      Thanks, Meadow for the suggestions-that's what I was hoping for, to get some ideas about what veggies might make it easier.

                      Originally posted by Forever Young View Post
                      These drugs actually can increase your chances of a stroke or heart attack. They have no place in a healthy diet/lifestyle.
                      Yeah, I know this, you know this, but apparently my husband's doctor does not know this. My husband, just like many people, believes his doctor. I'm just glad that the medication was expensive enough to make my husband reconsider his lifestyle. He goes back to the doc in one month and has agreed to try walking and making some changes to his diet before he actually has the prescription filled.
                      My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread51572.html

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                      • #12
                        I said it came across that way to me...that is because you have a grown man that would rather take a pill for the rest of his life to "fix" a problem instead of reining in his diet and exercising/taking control of his own health and a wife saying she has her work cut out for her. I think it's great that he is open to making changes now, but it's kinda sad that it had to be a financial motivation to do so instead of wanting a long and healthy life.

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                        • #13
                          One other thing.....my husband has a sweet tooth, so I will sometimes compromise and for example cook acorn squash with cinnamon and brown sugar or honey. In his salads, I usually always include some nuts to offset the lack of croutons, and often times I come up with a salad that will include a sweet item....like dried cranberries, sliced up strawberries, pears, or apples. A greek salad with spinach, feta, red onions, red pepper, and pecans is one of his favorites where I can actually use a homemade dressing (raspberry vinegar with olive oil, S&P, bit of honey to sweeten). Its a bit too many carbs for me personally, but he will get thirds of it. I am getting him to use stevia a lot, but I am trying to not make myself crazy either.

                          I pack a lot of sliced raw carrots or jicima in his lunches, and usually I will sneak in a couple pieces of cucumber or colored pepper in there as well. If he is already eating the carrots, usually a couple non sweet veggies will go down as well...lol. I have started buying Wholly Guacamole now and again, mostly because it is easy for me to quickly grab some guac and a few veggies for dipping and hand it over to him for a snack or with dinner.
                          Erin
                          Daily Vlogs
                          Primal Pets Blog

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                          • #14
                            Hey, I totally agree with the posters who suggested looking at the advice for transitioning kids to primal, and Meadow's advice sounds great! Definitely try a wide range of different vegetables and preparations. Cut up vegetables with guacamole or yogurt dip, sauteed with butter and herbs, pureed in a creamy soup, roasted on a grill, stewed in a nice spicy beef chili...there are just so many ways to eat vegetables!

                            I just wanted to add that in the case of veggie-phobes, it's always worth considering whether they might be a supertaster. About 25% of the population has an increased perception of bitter flavors, which often leads them to dislike spinach, broccoli, kale, brussel sprouts, etc. If that is the case, you're may be wasting your time trying to feed him those veggies, and should try introducing milder veggies like pepper, cucumber, carrots, etc instead.
                            The Primal Holla! Eating fat. Getting lean. Being awesome.

                            You were sick, but now you're well, and there's work to do. - Kilgore Trout

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                            • #15
                              Puree all of his food. Tell him you'll treat him as a baby until he stops acting like one
                              Four years Primal with influences from Jaminet & Shanahan and a focus on being anti-inflammatory. Using Primal to treat CVD and prevent stents from blocking free of drugs.

                              Eat creatures nose-to-tail (animal, fowl, fish, crustacea, molluscs), a large variety of vegetables (raw, cooked and fermented, including safe starches), dairy (cheese & yoghurt), occasional fruit, cocoa, turmeric & red wine

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