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Fat mom's daily struggles.. and other junk

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  • Fat mom's daily struggles.. and other junk

    Had another journal that I let lag for too long and decided to start a new one. I'll try to keep this short and not ramble on as much as I did before (HA we'll see how long that lasts).
    If you'd like to join b/c you have similar problems, struggles, etc, then please do Would love some company!

    Age: 34
    Weight: 210 (give or take a few pounds depending on the day)
    Height: 5'1"
    Health: PCOS, Insulin Resistance, Hypothyroidism. (Thyroid problem is under control, and I'm on metformin but the IR is kicking my ass when it comes to losing weight). AND infertility seeming to be caused by my excess weight.

    Goal(s): Get pregnant, Get thin/healthy
    Main goal right now is to get down to a fertile weight. My fertility seems to be tied in to how much I weigh. I ballooned back up after having our first child and it's been wreaking havoc on my body. PCOS symptoms are going insane.
    After getting pregnant again and having that baby.... I would very much like to be thin for once. I know, healthy this healthy that, doing it for my child(ren), blahblahblah..... yeah yeah, we've all heard that before. I just want to look good damnit!


    Extra Info: My highest weight in my adult life was 250. Lowest was 180. Conceived my daughter when I was 195.
    I HATE exercising. Watching my toddler all day wears me out so exercising is the last thing on my mind. I know it's something I REALLY need to work on though.
    We bought a new boxing thingamajig that I've been bugging my husband for so I'll be using that soon.

    Diet... it isn't perfectly primal, but I think it works for our lives. Friday dinners is a night out with the inlaws at whatever restaurant they choose. Honestly, I'm not going to worry about that one meal.
    I do also plan on having rice sometimes. It's not going to be a daily thing, but if I want some, I'm going to eat some. My struggle with that is limiting just how much I do eat. I'm half Korean and you know how Asians love their rice :P lol



    And I think that's it for now. I'll be back at the end of the day to report on what I ate.
    DD born August 2012
    TTC #2
    SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
    CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
    Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
    Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

    My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

  • #2
    Forgot to come back, oops. Hmm, I'll probably just do what I did in my last journal and report on what I ate the next day.

    Lunch: 3 pork chops pan fried in coconut oil.
    Snacks: Apple, spoon of dark chocolate PB, 2 dark chocolate squares
    Dinner: 1c white rice, fermented squid, about 1/2c of this other Korean side dish that I have no idea what it is (some sort of plant), 1c kimchi, salad w/ homemade ginger dressing. In the salad was red onion, red pepper, romaine lettuce

    That ginger dressing is pretty good. I did use ketchup in it though. It's no HFCS but still. Next time I'll make it with tomato paste and a little extra honey to make up for the sweetness that is missing from the ketchup.

    Ginger Dressing Recipe
    For anyone that is interested. Of course replace the non healthy stuff w/ healthier options.
    The few changes I made this time..
    I used light flavor olive oil. Red onion, white wine vinegar (didn't have rice. Also no water, just used more vinegar), tamari soy sauce (added a little extra salt since I find tamari soy sauce is less salty than regular), honey instead of the sugar. I also didn't have celery so replaced it with celery seed which was pretty tasty.
    Popped it all in to my tiny food processor and let it blend up in to a nice consistency.
    DD born August 2012
    TTC #2
    SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
    CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
    Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
    Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

    My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

    Comment


    • #3
      Lunch/Breakfast: About 4 or 5 strips of bacon and 2 eggs
      Dinner: 1.5c rice, fermeneted squid, mystery delicious Korean side dish, leftover bbq chicken legs
      Snacks: 2 spoonful of dark chocolate PB, sugar free jello


      I know I know. peanut butter isn't exactly primal. We're still in a bit of a transition period. DH and I both seem to want sweets quite a bit at first and get SUPER snacky. We figured we'd by the least offensive thing and snack on it for now while we get through it. We should both be over it by next week and not feeling so snacky by then.

      I am having a lot of rice this week. It's not going to be the norm though. Most weeks will be no rice or rice once and that's it.

      Anyway, looking up videos on how to use the heavy bag we have and will start that up next week


      EDIT: I forgot... the bacon and eggs was my breakfast, and I fixed some boiled/steamed cabbage for lunch
      Last edited by LisaLS; 01-16-2014, 08:29 AM.
      DD born August 2012
      TTC #2
      SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
      CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
      Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
      Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

      My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

      Comment


      • #4
        Lunch: Left over spicy chicken soup *
        Dinner: Pan fried in coconut oil chicken breast, 2.5 eggs, 4 pieces of bacon
        Snack: Apple, about 2-3 spoons of dark chocolate pb, pickle

        * I change up the soup recipe some. No corn, 3-4 cans of diced tomato, 1 can of tomato sauce, chicken or beef broth instead of plain water, and I add in 2 cans of kidney beans.
        The only time we eat beans is if I fix this or chili.


        Anywho.... you know those things (whatever they may be) that are right in your face, and you're reminded of them but it still doesn't really register?
        Yeah... I had one of those things and it was aspartame. I've heard over and over how it is bad for you... In my gut, I believed it, but I dunno..... for some reason it just never really registered that... ya know.. maybe we shouldn't get foods w/ it in it.
        That is until today. I'm really not sure what clicked... what switch in me turned on finally, but it did and yeah.. no more.
        If we want something, then it's just going to have to be regular whatever or something that has stevia I guess. But def no more aspartame. Something that shouldn't even be used. And with my insulin resistance, I'm not going to be able to have much of regular full sugar crap so this could be a good thing lol.

        And the funny thing is... apparently my husband was having the same thought and watched a video while at work today that mentioned how bad it is.
        It's a really great video (at least the first half) to watch. Maybe something to pass on to friends and family that still don't want to give up their sugar and diet whatnots.
        The American Parasite - 250 Million Americans Infected - YouTube

        I know Mark has said this stuff, and it's common knowledge here too. I dunno... my eyes were half shut for some reason but not anymore.

        So yeah... we have a few unprepared boxes of sugar free jello and pudding we'll be throwing out.
        DD born August 2012
        TTC #2
        SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
        CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
        Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
        Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

        My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

        Comment


        • #5
          Time to come clean.
          The reason I haven't updated is because I've been embarassed by what I've eaten.
          Friday started off with rice rice and more rice. I did limit how much but still...
          Then Friday dinner with family started the downward spiral that led in to Saturday's mess.
          Friday... we went to IHoP. I LOVE pancakes and gorged myself on all-you-can-eat pancakes. Surprised I wasn't oozing syrup.
          Not worrying about Friday dinners shouldn't mean going apeshit and eating until I'm stuffed to the gills with bad stuff. I need to remember this.
          Saturday was fried chicken and french fries for lunch w/ pizza and cheesy bread for dinner and bedtime full of antacid pills and regret.

          After groaning and complaining about our constant gas and stomach aches, we both decided to do another whole30. No bad shit, no dark chocolate, no dairy, no beans, no rice *NOOOOO*
          My husband's guy nights... he'll be eating at home beforehand. Friday's will be tricky and I'm sure we'll have problems here and there, but we're going to do our best to keep on track w/ whole30.
          The only problem I can see coming up is me having to come up with a variety of sides. Neither of us really like a lot of veggies that are popular with primal... especially my husband, but it's something we've had to deal with before so not too big of a deal.

          Anyway, tomorrow will be the first day. We need to go shopping and then purge the house of anything tempting & bad.
          DD born August 2012
          TTC #2
          SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
          CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
          Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
          Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

          My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

          Comment


          • #6
            Grocery shopping is done and yeah... time to get this started. Or well, it will be started tomorrow. I'm kinda sorta having a last cup of coffee. It's not very good though b/c the coffee is kinda old. BLEH. I also had myself a Mexican coke today too. I've been wanting carbonation for a while now and it's at least a tiny bit better than the HFCSyrupy shit.

            Anyway!
            Excited to get this show on the road. Well ok, excited and anxious too. I don't have much dairy to begin with but it's just that thing of when you know you can't have it, you all of a sudden want it like crazy. Stupid brain!
            Last edited by LisaLS; 01-19-2014, 08:01 PM.
            DD born August 2012
            TTC #2
            SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
            CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
            Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
            Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

            My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

            Comment


            • #7
              WTH is wrong with me? Stupid brain!
              We rarely ever bought candy before (bad candy I mean, not dark chocolate bars which we still don't get that often). We might indulge once a month, but that's it.
              This is day one of Whole30 and all of a sudden I'm craving some like crazy b/c I know I can't have it. WTF?? Seriously body/brain? SIGH!

              About to go down an apple or some pork rinds (it's just pork and salt), to help w/ the munchie cravings.
              DD born August 2012
              TTC #2
              SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
              CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
              Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
              Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

              My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

              Comment


              • #8
                A bit early but don't plan on eating anything else tonight...

                Breakfast/lunch: 2 pork chops pan fried in coconut oil
                Dinner: Buffalo chicken breasts, green beans, salad w/ homemade ginger dressing.
                Snacks: 2 golden delicious apples, plain pork rinds

                Buffalo chicken breasts- I just cubed the chicken breasts, pan fried in butter (I know), and then added Texas Pete near the end. I know... I didn't even realize about the butter until after I had eaten. DUH...
                I think I'm going to OK butter and ghee to cook with (try to stick with just the ghee from now on though). And also OK the little bit of honey used in the salad dressings. I know for super strict you're not supposed to do either, but oil & vinegar for salad dressings gets boring as shit after a couple of days and I can not see us doing that for 30.

                And yes, I did use Texas Pete. It does have some preservative in it, but the ingredients looked ok to me so I used it.
                DD born August 2012
                TTC #2
                SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
                CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
                Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
                Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

                My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

                Comment


                • #9
                  Day 2

                  Breakfast: 3 pork chops pan fried in coconut oil
                  Lunch: Couple of pork rinds & boiled/fried cabbage w/ bacon fat
                  Dinner: Chili*
                  Snack: Apple, Couple of pork rinds

                  * For the chili I use the base spices that are listed here on MDA.
                  Tonight's chili consisted of
                  1lb of ground beef, 1lb of ground deer, 2 red bell peppers, 2 yellow onions, 6 jalapenos, minced garlic, 4 cans of no salt added diced tomato, 1 can of tomato paste, chili powder, paprika, salt, coriander, cumin, oregano
                  No beans as I would normally put in to it. It still tasted pretty good. And I chopped everything pretty large to try to make up for the missing beans.

                  Cravings today were better but still there. I know it will be gone by next week though so I'm holding strong.
                  Already out of things I want to make with chicken breast. We have a boat load and it's going to be our main meat source for dinners and... I just hate cooking it. I have not figured out a way to cook it alone to keep it from drying out and being boring.
                  DD born August 2012
                  TTC #2
                  SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
                  CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
                  Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
                  Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

                  My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Really quick...

                    Got a dull headache yesterday and bloated up like crazy. Think the bloating may have been from the cabbage though and the headache, not sure. Usually only times I get a headache are when I'm dehydrated or my hormones are going crazy and I know I at least wasn't dehydrated.

                    Also, I had to get up A LOT last night to use the bathroom. Guess my body was getting rid of some of that extra bloat. Wish it could do it during the day instead when I'm awake :P
                    DD born August 2012
                    TTC #2
                    SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
                    CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
                    Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
                    Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

                    My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      For Jan 22nd

                      Breakfast: eggs & bacon
                      Lunch: Pork meatballs in beef broth
                      Dinner: Chicken breast, salad, baked sweet potato
                      Snacks: Apple, Pineapple, pork rinds


                      Notes: Sugar cravings are slowly but surely going away. I still find myself wanting some junk food every now and then, but it's not a strong all consuming feeling anymore.
                      My sleep hasn't been the best. I'm getting to sleep quicker than I normally would which I'm thankful for, but I always wake b/c I can't find a comfortable position. Think it's our mattress though. Expensive pillowtop piece of crap that we never should have bought.
                      DD born August 2012
                      TTC #2
                      SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
                      CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
                      Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
                      Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

                      My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        You ever feel like that nerd that tries to hang out with cool kids... or that awkward parent that tries to hang out with your kids and their friends? Yeah, I always get the feeling I'm that parent on these boards. ROFL.
                        Always seems like, no matter where I go, if I reply.. the thread dies right after :P Hehehe
                        Oh well.

                        Hunger today so far has been ok. Fixed some breakfast sausage (homemade) and eggs that I shared with my girl. Felt hungry afterwards though and still feeling it a bit. May eat an apple soon.

                        breakfast sausage- 2lbs of ground pork, sage, black pepper, salt, marjoram, fennel seeds.
                        DD born August 2012
                        TTC #2
                        SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
                        CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
                        Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
                        Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

                        My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Jan 23rd

                          Breakfast: Eggs w/ homemade sausage
                          Lunch: Pork meatballs in beef broth along w/ 2 eggs
                          Dinner: Small piece of chicken breast, bacon, eggs
                          Snacks: Apple, seaweed wraps (like you use for sushi)

                          Boy... I had a lot of eggs today. I love eggs, but I do need to be more careful when eating them. Sometimes my body handles them well and other times... my body wants them out of me ASAP.. and I don't mean by mouth.
                          I should probably give them up but I can't. I love them damnit!
                          Still no exercise. SIGH. Disappointed in myself. I was going to start this week and now I'm just using everything I can as an excuse not to. With the bad sleep, and then taking care of our baby girl... I just don't want to exercise in my spare time. I want to sit down and relax!
                          DD born August 2012
                          TTC #2
                          SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
                          CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
                          Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
                          Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

                          My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Jan 24th

                            Breakfast: Fermented squid, couple bites of banana that baby girl didn't want (until after I ate it)
                            Lunch: Sauteed asparagus in ghee. More fermented squid
                            Dinner: 2 pieces of fried chicken minus the skin, lots of boiled cabbage, 1 piece of roast beef, steamed broccoli, salad w/ oil and vinegar
                            Snacks: Lots and lots of seaweed wraps (daughter and I eat them like chips heh), pineapple, couple orange slices

                            Dinner tonight was w/ family as it usually is on Fridays. We tried picking somewhere that we'd have more of a selection so picked a buffet. They really didn't have much selection in the meat department that wasn't completely coated with flour.
                            I did end up with the 2 pieces of fried chicken though. I took the skin off and tried to scrape off as much of the flour as I could (which wasn't that much), but I still ended up eating some of it that was stuck to the meat. Nevermind whatever oil they used to fry it.
                            Still didn't do too bad though I don't think and I'm not going to beat myself up over it. Just continue on and hopefully keep losing some weight so nights like this won't be a problem
                            DD born August 2012
                            TTC #2
                            SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
                            CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
                            Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
                            Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

                            My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Jan 25th

                              Breakfast: Eggs & breakfast sausage
                              Lunch: Tin of sardines w/ hot sauce
                              Dinner: 3 porkchops
                              Snacks: Apple, couple pork rinds, 4 pickle spears

                              Lunch was ROUGH today. Normally if neither of us felt like cooking, we would go out and get something. I didn't feel like cooking and neither did DH so yeah... it was a lot of moaning and groaning about how we're hungry and we don't have anything... anything fast and easy that is.
                              I remembered that I had a tin of sardines and some smoked oysters though and just had the sardines. Hot sauce makes me feel a bit fuller so I drowned them in it.
                              It kinda worked, but I did snack quite a bit between lunch and dinner.
                              Dinner was supposed to be leftovers but I REALLY didn't want chicken AGAIN, so thawed some pork chops and fixed those. Yum

                              I've been cheating and weighing myself daily. I know you shouldn't, but it's just so damn addictive and seeing the scale go down really helps.
                              Of course seeing it go back up sucks, but ya know... take what you get.
                              I did see a 207.something weight today though which is pretty darn awesome! Hope to see that or lower on weigh in day (Monday).
                              Pretty sure most of that loss was bloat. Hard to believe just how much water weight, bloating, etc your body can hold on to.
                              DD born August 2012
                              TTC #2
                              SW: 1/20/14- 212.4
                              CW: 2/21/14- 202.6 (9.8 loss)
                              Goal: Short term, get below 200 and get pregnant. Long term, get to 120-130
                              Mini goal, get in to a size 12.

                              My boring uneventful journal for your viewing pleasure

                              Comment

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