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Primal Journal (Alexis47)

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  • Primal Journal (Alexis47)

    I figured I ought to get around to making a journal, since I have a habit of forgetting what I looked like, how I ate, and my level of health after a year or so. It would certainly be helpful to have this written down somewhere.

    Anyway, to the point:
    My health isn't where I'd like it to be. I can't run a mile without getting horribly winded and I can't do more than one real push-up (chest to ground). I snack frequently, and I obsess over calories and nutrition, especially with overeating, since I was anorexic a few years back and the same mentality is still lingering. Until 7/23/2013 I was vegan, the kind who ate everything packaged, be it frozen or boxed, and lived off of carbs. I had cut out non-fruit sugars as well as most grains three weeks prior, though.

    I want to get good sleep every night and not eat constantly. I also want to eat enough, but I don't know what is too little or too much. I want to be able to do fifty push-ups in a row, and run a mile in under ten minutes without dying inside. I want to have great concentration and energy all the time so I can focus on my schoolwork, even though I got top grades last year despite being a zombie who was out of energy just by going up two flights of stairs. I'd also like to lose some body fat and gain a lot more muscle, but I don't want to focus on losing body fat right now because I worry that I'll end up stressing myself out and starving on purpose, or eating too little, or something along those lines. So I'm focusing on building muscle and improving mental/physical health for now, and will work on fat % later if need be. I'm only at 20% body fat, and purposefully trying to get that lower right now will probably backfire miserably for my mental health.

    My father is also Primal now. He started the same day as me, though his goals are mostly body fat oriented as far as I know. My sister isn't, but she only eats organic poptarts or something here, so it's not like there's any conflict with meals. My stepmother isn't primal (she's currently SAD, with lots of whole-wheat). She might switch over eventually, though, once it shows results. It would be nice if everyone ate the same stuff, since then I could cook the same dinner for everyone. I rather like cooking.


    Breakfast: can of wild Alaskan salmon (the kind with the bones in it, which I found out when I opened it), olive oil, turmeric, two slices of turkey bacon
    Lunch: skipped
    Snack(s): full-fat, organic, grass-fed yogurt with frozen wild blueberries (I like those more than fresh because they remind me of fresh-picked berries more than store-bought fresh ones), and almond/coconut oil butter. Lots of it. (That stuff is evil, I tell you. I need to stop making it.) Four or five macadamia nuts.
    Dinner: 1 slice meatza (4 oz 85% lean grass-fed beef, 1/4 egg, spices, olive oil, feta, raw grass-fed organic white cheddar, Applegate Farms uncured pepperoni)
    Dessert: 1 square 99% dark chocolate from World Market (1/8 bar I think, only like 50 calories)
    Tea: Republic of Tea valerian root tea with unsweetend vanilla coconut milk

    Workout: not much, 55 minute walk on treadmill. Covered about 2.2 miles. Wore vibrams seeya LS. Listened to a podcast, read fifty pages of The Invisible Man. Considered moving the Xbox upstairs so I could multitask and play video games while walking. It would certainly keep me from sitting down for too long. (Plus I could pretend that I'm the person walking endlessly through Skyrim while over-encumbered just to sell some junk I decided to hoard.)

    Other activities: bought another pair of vibrams (because my normal shoes are starting to feel really weird), went out in the hot Texas sun for twenty minutes, no sunscreen, without burning (my record is 1.5 hours, which was on Sunday--actually got a bit of a tan, my legs are no longer the shade of a drained corpse), spent too much time lurking on this forum, almost finished my last summer assignment for classes this coming year, and reorganized the pantry and fridge a tiny bit because someone put stuff in the wrong places (seriously can no one put things back where they belong, I don't care that you use one item a lot and you want to put it on a specific shelf in front of everything else, that's not where it goes, it's where I put it for a reason).

    I'd like to commend anyone who actually read all this. Today's entry will come either after dinner or tomorrow morning.

  • #2
    Day 1 (8/6/2013)

    Breakfast: coconut Larabar
    Lunch: leftovers from dinner (one slice meatza), 2 oz(?) chicken breast piece, 1 uncured grass fed organic hot dog, bell pepper slices, carrots, grape tomatoes, kalamata olives
    Snack: 1 cup coconut water, 4(?) macadamia nuts
    Dinner: broccoli, turkey roast thing (it was 3 lbs, I probably ate 3/4 lbs. First turkey I've ever cooked, and it turned out great--used butter, ghee, garlic, olive oil, salt, rosemary, and thyme. Somehow managed to cook it in the toaster oven.)

    It's difficult to get used to meals that large but they're more satisfying than multiple small carb boosts throughout the day, and I need to keep myself eating more if I want to gain muscle. My problem is more likely to be grazing and under-eating than eating too much at a meal. I'm pretty sure that the only way I'd be capable of gaining more fat would be skipping workouts and eating processed crap and carbs, so I shouldn't worry about eating too much.

    Workout: early morning (pre-breakfast) heavy lifting, 20 minutes, two circuits. I'm currently on incline push-ups, 2 leg chair assisted pull-ups, bench squats, and full plank on forearms. Was able to do five more push-ups than Friday, but still nowhere near my goal of 50. Almost moved up a level in squats though. Maybe next time or so.
    Also went on a 15 minute walk outside.

    Other: finished reading the book I started yesterday. Also finished the last of my summer assignments, which I had put off due to lethargy that is now gone. Didn't go outside besides the walk. I had to practice parking a car for half an hour since my license test is coming up next month. Had some stomach upset, nothing major. My acne appears to be clearing up.


    • #3
      Day 2 (8/7/2013)

      Breakfast: grass fed yogurt with frozen wild blueberries, the last of the almond butter (finally)
      Lunch: salad (spinach and lettuce mix with bell peppers, grape tomatoes, and thin shavings of raw white cheddar) with turkey leftovers (1/2 lb or something I assume, I'm not really in the habit of measuring everything I eat if you can tell)
      Snacks: handful of raisin and macadamia nut mix, some coconut water
      Dinner: chicken breast cooked in butter, seasoned with paprika, ground red pepper, sea salt, and pepper, with bell pepper slices, guacamole, and pico de gallo
      Dessert: square of 99% dark chocolate

      Workout: 27 minute brisk walk. Didn't feel much like doing anything else, but I ended up doing bursts of incline push-ups and other stuff throughout the day.

      Other: started doing some math exercises, reviewing everything from basic arithmetic to the start of calculus. I'm about 1/3 of the way through them so far. (Apparently on the site I use, khanacademy, the review stack keeps adding up if you leave it to sit--it was at 290 topics to review this morning! A lot lower now, though.) Spent twenty minutes outside in the sun. Had to listen to the usual drama with my father's work (mostly conference calls, bug-related frustration, and the like). I was bored a lot during the day, and also very restless at the same time. I tried to play a video game but couldn't sit still for long, so I quit. Dinner was a bit irritating--my stepmother doesn't like how I season the chicken strips she eats anymore, so she wants me to use one of those seasoning packets with high fructose and "natural flavours" in them. Yeah, that's getting cooked separately from my stuff. I tried to wear a pair of my old shoes to give my only pair of vibrams a break, but I only lasted two hours with that. That new pair needs to get here now. Finally, I meditated for ten minutes.

      Mini self-reflective rant: I keep stressing out about how much I'm eating and how much I'm working out. Then I stress out about stressing out about it. I really shouldn't be worrying much about it, since I do heavy lifting twice a week and sprinting once a week, and I'm not trying to lose weight. Probably shouldn't lose weight, actually, since I'm at an okay body fat % and I can see my top-most row of abs and I can kind of see the sides as well. (Would be more visible after some more time working on those muscles.) Really, my primary concern should be just eating clean foods that give me good energy, and building stronger muscles. So I should just stop worrying about not walking five miles a day and getting a certain amount of calories or eating at certain times in certain amounts. I mean really, I'm sixteen and I'm actually working out--it's not like I'm suddenly going to gain ten pounds because I ate too much for dinner and only walked a couple miles a week on top of normal activity.

      Anyway. Tomorrow will be a bit hectic. I'm probably going out to lunch somewhere, and I need to pick up a birthday gift for my stepmother. I also need to possibly thaw some salmon out but no one will tell me what's happening for dinner tomorrow so I have no clue how much to pull out of the freezer. I can only hope that I find out soon so there will be salmon, since if I'm told tomorrow morning it won't thaw out in time and I'll be to blame, and that I can get to sleep before my sister comes home at 10:30 and makes far too much noise for that time of night.


      • #4
        Welcome, Alexis! Sounds like you are off to a great start.

        55 minutes on the treadmill is good. If you did at least that much every day it would be great.

        No, don't try to go under 20% BF. Mother Nature doesn't want you to and will fight you every step of the way.

        Good luck on primal.
        Ancestral Health Info - My blog about Primal and the general ancestral health movement. Site just remodeled using HTML5/CSS3 instead of Wordpress.

        My MDA Friday success story - Stubborn Senior's Testimonial


        • #5
          Day 3 (8/8/2013)

          Breakfast: grass fed organic plain yogurt, blueberries, blackberries
          Snacks: raw white cheddar, uncured pepperoni, raisins, macadamia nuts, blueberries
          Lunch: 1/2 olive oil grilled salmon fillet and broccoli, 1/2 small chicken breast with guacamole and bell pepper slices
          Dinner: large salmon fillet (seasoned with paprika, turmeric, sea salt, and lemon juice) cooked without oil and broccoli

          Workout: 20 minute walk, actually outside this time. Also did some random incline push-ups throughout the day, and tested out how long I can run at 6 mph (I'm trying to work up to being able to easily run a mile in ten minutes). It wasn't impressive: 1 minute 19 seconds.

          Other: I wasted a lot of time today. Wasn't able to get a gift for my stepmother yet because my father had too much work, and I can't drive anywhere yet. Today was boring and I spent a lot more time than I should have lying on the floor watching YouTube videos, and I was a bit dizzy after that, especially since I didn't sleep well. Can't go anywhere, none of my friends are online, all work I needed to do is done, can't work out more because I'll exhaust myself...not a fun day at all. My new vibrams showed up, though. They're blue/green Alitzas.

          I'm still freaking out about calories. I think I'm eating a lot but I haven't once eaten to a point where I felt bad due to overeating. I'm just worried about eating too much and gaining fat, mostly because I don't know how much I need to be eating. I see some people talking about how they eat 1300 calories daily and others saying they eat around 4000...I figure I shouldn't restrict my calories intentionally since I'm trying to gain muscle and strength (I mean really, my max is just over a minute at 6 mph and 15 incline push-ups?!) rather than lose weight. But I still worry that I'll gain fat, especially since I'm not capable of working out to the point that I think eating this much won't be bad. If I eat less though I just get hungry again, but if I don't I worry I'll gain fat.


          • #6
            Day 4 (8/9/2013)

            Breakfast: coconut larabar, bulletproof tea (black tea, grass fed butter, unrefined coconut oil)
            Lunch: skipped
            Snack: organic grass fed hot dog, cube of raw organic cheddar
            Dinner: went to a restaurant, got steak and chicken with onions, green peppers, guacamole, and pico de gallo
            Dessert: 2 squares of 99% dark chocolate

            Workout: 2 circuit heavy lifting. Managed to do 20 incline push-ups, 55 bench squats, and 10 2-leg assisted pull-ups on both rounds. Planks were all about 1 minute.

            Other: spent the day at hurricane harbor. Walked up some stairs, then up some more stairs. Also burned my feet on the 105 degree pavement. Fun. Also, I restocked at Central Market--got a really good amount of meat, as well as birthday gifts for my stepmother. Will likely do sprinting early tomorrow morning. If not, then Sunday morning.


            • #7
              Day 5 (8/10/2013)

              Breakfast: bulletproof tea again, but with a bit of grass fed heavy cream since it's almost at the end of its life
              Lunch: went to Grimaldi's Pizzeria for my stepmother's birthday...kind of hard to pass that up, so I employed 80/20 and split a pizza with olive oil as the sauce with my father. We scraped the toppings (mozzarella, pepperoni, sausage) off and ate that but not the crust. We also split a large spinach salad with bacon, grilled chicken strips, some sort of blue cheese, and red onions.
              Dinner: went to my stepmother's mother's place for dinner, so we brought our own chicken strips, bacon, raw cheese, and kalamata olives to add to our servings of lettuce salad instead of the main course, which was lasagna.
              Dessert: everyone else had cake and cheap ice cream, and I spent 20 minutes hand-whipping the rest of that grass fed heavy cream (forgot to chill the cream...added an extra 10 minutes) and had that over frozen wild blueberries.
              I think my dessert probably tasted much better than theirs, and the only carbs in it was from blueberries.

              Workout: early morning sprinting around the block, despite the fact that I was sore all over except, luckily, my calves, from heavy lifting yesterday. I managed to do twice as much as I did last week. My feet ached less afterwards as compared to last week, and I was less out of breath. I matched my father's speed a couple of times at the start. We covered about 2 miles and encountered five different shih tzus along the way. Popular dog breed in this neighborhood, apparently.

              Other: nothing, really. Most of the day after sprinting was spent driving around getting into major traffic jams, at birthday related events, or cooking in preparation for those events. I did get a bit of very minor heartburn and bloating after lunch, though. I'm attributing it to the pizza toppings I ate. They were quite good though, and I would eat it again, just not for a very, very long time, and only if the opportunity happens to arise. Hey--still managed to stay mostly primal all day. The only stuff that wasn't was the quality of what I ate at lunch. (Somehow I doubt that the cheese and meats were organic, grass-fed, and the like.)


              • #8
                Day 6 (8/11/13)

                Breakfast: 4 egg yolk omelette with cheese, 2 slices bacon, grape tomatoes, raisins, macadamia nuts
                Lunch: salad with chicken and bacon. It was at Red Lobster. Didn't eat much of it--little appetite.
                Snacks (throughout the day, not all at once): chia seed Kombucha, hand-whipped grass fed heavy cream with fresh organic strawberries and blueberries (lots of it), block of sharp cheddar
                Dinner: grass fed burger with smoked paprika (really good), sharp cheddar, 2 grass fed organic hot dogs, and guacamole
                Dessert: 2 squares 99% dark chocolate

                Workout: was supposed to be a rest day, but I mowed most of the lawn in 105 degree weather (push mower I think? It ran on gas and I had to push it so I think that's what it was), and did 20 incline push-ups. Those were boredom-induced.

                Other: not much. Worked myself into a major panic attack this afternoon, which drained me of most my energy. Interesting how I can be choking on air one minute, and calmer than I've been for weeks half an hour later. I guess it's from exhaustion. Despite how bad it was, it's been a month between this one and the last. Pre-primal, I was having one around every two weeks. Probably unrelated, but I can hope.

                Additional notes: I'm thinking I need to eat more in general. I shouldn't really be limiting calories or carbs, since I'm a teenager and I'm trying to gain muscle, not lose weight. And I keep getting hungry throughout the day. So I'm going to cook a bunch of chicken breasts tomorrow and cut them up. That way, I can make salads for breakfast and some lunches with chicken, canned salmon (the kind without bones and skin), whatever leftover meat I have from dinners, cheese, olives, olive oil, etc. That way I won't have to have BP tea or yogurt and berries for breakfast (I'm not allowed to cook in the mornings Monday through Friday). I'm thinking this will also be a fairly good plan for breakfast and lunch once school rolls around in two weeks.


                • #9
                  Day 7 (8/12/13)

                  I'm going to stop specifying if something's organic or wild and/or grass fed/pastured because practically everything I eat at home is. So you can pretty much just assume it falls into those categories somehow.

                  Breakfast: yogurt, blueberries, macadamia nuts
                  Snack: sharp cheddar (didn't eat enough substantial for breakfast...ended up gnawing on a chunk of cheese. Not ashamed at all.)
                  Lunch: salad with salmon, olive oil, kalamata olives, tomatoes, lettuce, and two hot dogs
                  Snack: more macadamia nuts, some almonds (again didn't eat enough substantial at lunch)
                  Dinner: broccoli and lots of turkey. I think I ate somewhere around a pound or so? The plate was full. And yet, I was not overfull at the end of it.
                  Dessert: 2 squares 99% dark chocolate

                  Workout: today was supposed to be a rest day. I kept getting irritated though so I ended up doing five sets of ten consecutive incline push-ups spread throughout the day. I do push-ups when I'm mad now, apparently. I used to do that all the time months ago but I didn't know I was doing them wrong, my chest was at least a foot off the ground at the bottom of those "push-ups." Obviously I wasn't strong enough to do a full push-up back then. I might be now but I want to get to 50 consecutive incline push-ups (no more than 20 second breaks during the set, and an average of 10 reps between breaks) before I step up to that next level. I want to be completely certain that I'm capable of doing them with perfect form.

                  Other: stayed outside for at least an hour. I think my knees might be a bit burned. Whoops.

                  Additional notes: despite being almost four weeks in, I'm certain my body is still trying to adjust. Anyway, I always seem to get hungry between meals, and I'm pretty sure I'm not eating enough. I think the fact that I was able to eat all I did at dinner kind of proved that. Eventually I want to be eating two to four meals a day, with no need to snack in between, and I want to cut out nuts for the most part. I would do that right now, but they're the only snack food I have with fat and protein to them. Hopefully boosting up my meals with some chicken I'm cooking tomorrow will help alleviate the need to eat between meals. Eggs would be an easier way to add to meals, but apparently I can't stomach them.


                  • #10
                    Oh yeah--I also experimented with the scale today. This morning, I was at 112 lbs with 20.6% body fat. This afternoon before a quick shower, I was at 115 lbs at 22% body fat! That was really kind of shocking, so I took another reading immediately after the shower: 113 lbs at 20.9% body fat. Somehow I dropped two pounds of fat in a five minute cold shower? I doubt it.

                    I don't think I'm trusting scales from now on. I'll judge by health, ability, and appearance instead.


                    • #11
                      Day 8 (8/13/2013)

                      Pre-workout: handful of almonds
                      Breakfast: chicken breast cooked in olive oil, sharp cheddar, grape tomatoes, strawberries, three slices bacon, coconut water
                      Lunch: turkey with 1 tsp butter, two hot dogs, salad with 1/4 cup canned salmon, olive oil, grape tomatoes, lettuce and spinach, bell pepper slices
                      Dinner: meatza (1/2 lbs 92% lean ground beef, sharp cheddar, raw white cheddar, uncured pepperoni), raspberries, blackberries

                      Workout: heavy lifting. Better in some areas than Friday, worse in others. Incline push-ups: 25 first round, 17 second. Squats: 45 first round, 35 second. 2 leg assisted pull-ups: 12 both rounds. Plank: about 50 seconds each. Side plank: 35 seconds each. I tried to do a full normal push-up later on in the day, and could not. Disappointing. I can't move on until I can do at least one. Later I went on a short 10 minute walk.

                      Other: I was tired most of the day. Slept very poorly. I've also been bloated recently, unsure as to why. I was able to get through the day without being hungry between meals though, which is good. I'm going to try adjusting my meals in the next two weeks if possible to breakfast and dinner only, with possibly a snack around 3:30, so I don't have to pack any food for lunch at school.


                      • #12
                        Day 9 (8/14/2013)

                        Breakfast: turkey, chicken breast, bacon, salad with bell peppers, grape tomatoes, and 1 tbsp coconut oil, yogurt with blackberries, raspberries
                        Snack (4:15 pm): almonds and macadamia nuts, 1 tbsp coconut oil
                        Dinner: turkey, 2 hot dogs, large bowl of vegetables (grape tomatoes, bell peppers, carrots) and guacamole, 2 squares 99% dark chocolate

                        Workout: supposed to be a rest day. Wasn't very restful.


                        • #13
                          Day 10 (8/15/2013)

                          Breakfast: last of the turkey, chicken breast, raw cheddar, grape tomatoes, carrots, yogurt with wild blueberries, chai tea with 1 tbsp butter and 1 tbsp coconut oil
                          Snack (3:10 pm): 2 slices bacon, 2 squares 99% dark chocolate
                          Dinner: 6 oz fillet mignon seared in ghee, steamed broccoli
                          Immediately after dinner snack: almonds, macadamia nuts, raisins, 1 tbsp coconut oil

                          Workout: did another 6 mph run test--made it to 2 minutes this time without dying or anything, which is 41 seconds better than last time. Walked a bit after, and went on a 20 minute walk outside, for a total of 30 minutes. It's quite obvious that most of today has been catching up on the rest missed yesterday due to various stressors.

                          Other: I wasn't hungry at all between breakfast and the snack I had this afternoon. Which is good. However, I seem to be eating a lot. I think breakfast was 1000 calories. Snack was about 200. Dinner was probably 500, and the snack after dinner was about 300. Should I really be eating this much? I don't know. Not trying to lose weight, and trying to gain muscle, so probably? I don't even know. I just know that I'm still kind of hungry after all that. I'm fasting on Saturdays until dinner, so that brings the average weekly down, so it probably doesn't matter much if I eat so much during the week.

                          And once more, I'm thinking I'm eating too much, and attempting to justify it to myself. I really need to keep a watch on that--I certainly don't want my old eating disorder to take hold again.


                          • #14
                            Day 11 (8/16/2013)

                            Pre-workout: small amount of almonds, macadamia nuts, raisins
                            Breakfast: very large chicken breast, three slices bacon, grape tomatoes, carrots, yogurt with wild blueberries, chai tea with 1 tbsp coconut oil, 1 tbsp gelatin, small amount heavy cream
                            Snack (4:00 pm): small cube sharp cheddar, green tea with coconut oil, heavy cream
                            Dinner: salad (chicken, bacon, lettuce, spinach, some sort of cheese), 2 squares 99% dark chocolate

                            Workout: heavy lifting. Did a total of 50 squats, 12 assisted pull-ups, 2 negatives for pull-ups, 1 minute plank, 45 seconds side planks, and 6 push-up negatives. Later on, I did four more of these, and they were much easier and smoother. (Still really difficult though, just more do-able.) Also: my arms are really quite sore. Less so than earlier, but movement is somewhat restricted. My legs are unaffected for the most part.

                            Other: went to Central Market to restock again. Got the following: 2.25 lbs bacon, 1/2 lbs turkey bacon, 5.3 lbs grass fed beef (3 lbs ground, 2.3 lbs London Broil, whatever that is), raw white cheddar, heavy cream, a bottle of blood orange kombucha, organic eggs (for my father, not me), and yogurt. Still need to get misc. vegetables and probably strawberries, as well as uncured organic hot dogs. I almost got calf liver but I'm not sure of the quality I should be looking for, so I'll wait on that until later. I'm quite pleased with the outcome of this trip.


                            • #15
                              Day 12 (8/17/2013)

                              19 hour fast
                              Snack (2:30 pm): small bit of cheddar, blueberries and yogurt
                              Dinner: 12 oz strip steak, broccoli, squash, carrots. Steak was ordered medium rare, came out medium. Disappointing, but still good.
                              Dessert: red velvet cupcake from a vegan joint. Waaaaaaay obviously not primal, but it tasted really quite good. I feel a bit sick now though.

                              Workout: sprinting. Went well, covered 1.2 miles. I was able to match speed with my father for the first two sprints.

                              Other: fasting was quite easy today, and I will likely continue doing this on most Saturdays. Quite a lot of muscle soreness resulting from yesterday's workout--nothing too bad, but still notable. Mostly in my arms and chest. I haven't decided if the cupcake was worth it. It certainly wasn't much of a hit health-wise, since I fasted today and have pretty much been primal 98% of the time. However, like I stated earlier, I feel sick now, and have a nasty headache. I would have preferred something primal instead. Which is somewhat sad, since the place I got it from used to be my favorite restaurant/bakery. I used to get custom birthday cakes there yearly.

                              Side note: today's scale read 114 lbs at 21% BF, though the difference between how I looked today and how I looked three weeks ago is startling. I'm quite happy with it so far.
                              Last edited by Alexis47; 08-17-2013, 05:42 PM.