Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Journey To Happiness - A Magical Land Where I'm Finally Content

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Originally posted by Derpamix View Post
    It makes me feel old...
    Haha no, i'm pretty sure you aren't that much older than me. It's either mr.derp (due to your waterfall of wisdom) or derpalicious (because you remind me of gummy bears - which are delicious). Your pick!
    Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

    Comment


    • I'm actually a teenage girl anyway, so Derpalicious it is
      Make America Great Again

      Comment


      • Originally posted by CiKi90
        hah, I'd be honest with you, but it would never be awkward to show me your photo! If you have weight to lose, it's nothing to be ashamed of, it's just so normal these days. It would be awkward if you thought that you were like, super scrawny and actually you were huge! But, I'll never know until I see what you're workin' with. lol!

        Disassociating exercise with weight is a great idea. I try to do that all the time. I've been thinking about entering some kind of competition -- something small, like a 5k or whatever -- nothing too crazy! Just so that I have a goal in the future to work towards. Everyone always asks me, "what's your goal in fitness?" and I really don't know! I'm always just like, "to be in shape? I dunno!" But then, they point out that I'm already in shape, so .... to stay in shape forever? It gets confusing to other people. But ... if we're being honest here, a lot of things I choose to do in my life confuse other people!
        You have to be like 'i wanna be the very best, that no one ever was'.
        Yes i made a pokemon reference and if you don't get it, i'll crawl into a corner and sing the theme song to myself.
        I think i will get a picture soon then! Would be good to get some clear-eyed advice.
        Also, definitely join a competition. You'd probably win!
        Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

        Comment


        • Originally posted by Derpamix View Post
          I'm actually a teenage girl anyway, so Derpalicious it is
          I was going to say 'me too!' as a joke, then I remembered I am a teenage girl...
          Derpalicious sounds good to me, i just picture you as a giant gummy bear now. Deeeeerpppaaliiciious!
          Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

          Comment


          • Originally posted by Driedmango View Post
            I was going to say 'me too!' as a joke, then I remembered I am a teenage girl...
            Derpalicious sounds good to me, i just picture you as a giant gummy bear now. Deeeeerpppaaliiciious!
            A gummy bear that eats gummy bears
            Make America Great Again

            Comment


            • Sunday, 14th July 2013

              Day One Of My Little Experiment

              Sleep

              I didn't sleep at all last night, but I did "nap" from 8am to around 12.30 pm. I don't know what's going on with my sleeping, I really thought I'd be in bed early today, but it's 5 am, and I'm not asleep again.

              Food
              Meal One: Chicken and Chicken liver (I feel evil reading that - poor chickens)
              Meal Two: Beef broth with beef + ~3 tbsp white rice
              Snacks: Dates and walnuts

              Exercise
              1) Walking
              ~2 hours
              ~7 miles
              2) Fitness Blender Video
              1000 Calorie Workout Video ? Fitness Blender?s 84 Minute HIIT Cardio, Strength, & Abs - Fitness Blender
              I wanted to do a really tough video, because I hadn't exercised in a few days. It didn't go toooo well (the HIIT bit - I'll elaborate in the thoughts and stuff section). But I really pushed myself on the strength training portion, so I'm happy. It feels really good to exercise again.

              Thoughts and Stuff
              Food Thoughts:
              I'm finding it pretty difficult to have any actual meals. I seem to always end up nauseous after. Dates/nuts and fruits seem to be okay, though, so I've been having a lot of dates.

              Exercise Thoughts:
              During the HIIT portion of the FB video, I got weirdly light headed + shaky hands + tasted metal in my mouth. Usually I can keep up fairly well with the instructors, but my general performance seemed to be pretty bad. I've only ever had the light headed and shakiness thing once, but I don't know what it was about. I considered that it might be food-related, but I'd eaten like 2 hours before, and I wasn't hungry at all. So I don't know.

              Other Body Stuff:
              My skin already seems to be clearing up a bit, so I'm really happy about that.
              BMs have been good, I think. I'm not too sure what "good" in that category is. They've been weirdly frequent. 3x yesterday and 2x today (is that TMI? sorry!). Considering I could go a week without a single BM, it's pretty odd. But I'm not complaining, I feel like there must've been a lot of junk in my system.
              My knees are also reallyyyy weird now. They're just so achey, I don't get it. It was like over night, they just turned into granny knees.
              Also have a killer headache right now.

              Super Duper Rude Guy At The Sports Shop:
              So I ended up going to the sports equipment store with my brother, instead of my father. And the guy made me so mad. The reason we were looking at barbells/power cages was because of me to begin with. Sure, my brother very obviously looks like an athlete, so I get the possible initial confusion, and why he would think it was my brother that was looking around. But he made it pretty damn clear he didn't think very highly of my lifting abilities. Every time I asked a question, he wouldn't even look at me, and would just answer looking at my brother. And anytime my brother asked me if something was good, the guy would completely dismiss my opinion as well.
              At some point he was saying that "if she's the one using it, then a smith machine would do, she shouldn't be doing free weights". Went on to say he didn't mean to brag, but he squats 200+ kg in the smith machine, and wouldn't risk it in a cage, so I clearly shouldn't either. Also not looking in my direction in the slightest. I just stared at him and said "no I don't want to do it in a smith machine, I like lifting without it".
              I don't know, maybe it sounds like I'm exaggerating, but it was 100% clear to me that he was the type of guy to just scoff at a female trying to lift, and it got on my nerves. And after discussing all the prices, and writing out all the plates we wanted for the barbell, he decides to be like "but it's not in stock. none of the cages are. but you can get it in 4-5 months." Blah. Oh well. My day was pretty good aside from that.

              Question Of The Day
              What's your favorite TV show or movie? And whyyy? I used to be a crazyyy movie buff. I have a ridiculous amount of DVDs. Not sure what happened or when I completely lost interest.

              And in the middle of the night, I may watch you go. There'll be no value in the strength of walls that I have grown. There'll be no comfort in the shade of the shadows thrown. But I'd be yours if you'd be mine
              Last edited by Driedmango; 07-14-2013, 06:07 PM.
              Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

              Comment


              • Originally posted by CiKi90
                Actually, I did get the reference! My friend has that song on his iPod and he'll tell me when it pops up during the workout, lol!

                I don't really want to *win* a competition, I don't think that's the important part -- although, knowing competitive little me, I would be like WIIIIIIIIIIIN!-- but just having a set date, and a goal to work toward, would make so much more sense to me! I'm always envious of people who are like, "training for a 5k!" or, "getting toned to look great on my wedding day!" or whatever the hellz. I can't just set an arbitrary date and pretend like it's important, either. grrr!

                Oh, and you don't have to take a brand new pic specifically for me! Just whatever you have laying around, if you want. Mainly I just want to be able to put a face to your name, or else I'll always picture you as a person with a dried mango for a head. (not rly lol)
                Haha phew, thought I'd have to get in the corner. It is pretty good to feel like you have a specific goal - I kinda wish I had one too, so I wouldn't be so wishy-washy. It's why I was actually contemplating switching majors at university to a fitness related one. I'd love to have my life just constantly be active. Haha I never thought I'd actually be talking to people regularly on the forums, I used the username "Driedmango" because I had just been eating some.

                Originally posted by Derpamix View Post
                A gummy bear that eats gummy bears
                That image made me giggle. I then proceeded to sing "derpaaaliiiciouuus" and my younger sister passed by, nodded, and said "Yeah. I like that. Derpalicious. It sounds good."
                Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

                Comment


                • Originally posted by CiKi90
                  Yeah, maybe that's why I'm looking into getting an online PT certification -- so that I always have a reason to stay fit and active, and I really enjoy learning about exercise, and spending my time in that way. I do get kind of wary of being a personal trainer, though, sometimes, just because I see some women who are like, bodybuilder status, and I feel like maybe a person would pass me up because I'm not super muscular -- nor do I want to be! Anyway. Dried mango is good ... have you ever had freeze-dried mangoes, though? They have such a fun texture! My fav freeze-dried fruit so far though, is either blueberries or bananas. Amazingggggg

                  I also just wanted to comment on why you felt icky during your workout today: I don't know how much you've been eating, but you have been having a lot of digestive issues lately, and haven't been able to stomach eating very much. With the way you're not sleeping properly, having aching joints, and having a hard time with GERD, I think you should tryyyy to take it easy with the working out for a little bit, until you get your food stuff straightened out. Walking and stuff is fine, but if you don't feel very well and can't sleep, maybe doing something with high intensity isn't the best idea. I would also suggest that you make sure you're getting all your electrolytes in balance.

                  QOTD: I love movies and tv, too, but there are too many to choose from! As far as movies go, I absolutely love kids movies: Kung Fu Panda, Despicable Me, Monsters Inc, Horton Hears a Who, etc.... Comedies are also great. But I usually don't like horror movies because they always just come across as stupid to me. For TV, I like watching Futurama, Breaking Bad, and makeover shows. Right now, I'm really loving Extreme Weight Loss. so crazy! Have you ever seen Supersize vs. Superskinny? It's a BBC show, but you can watch it on YouTube.
                  I dont think people would pass you up just because you don't look like a body builder. My PT is an olympic weight lifter, and she looks like a twig, honestly.

                  I know I should take it easy, but I feel so icky when I don't exercise, and knowing i did a tough work out makes me feel sooo good. But I'm taking longer breaks and stuff when I start to feel weird. The knee thing is reallllyyy weird though.

                  Ahhh kids movies are one of my guilty pleasures! And supersize vs. super skinny is a majooor guilty pleasure, haha. I love that show! I already watched all of them on youtube, sooo good. Have you tried secret eaters? Also a BBC show and also on youtube.
                  Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

                  Comment


                  • Monday, 15th July 2013

                    Day Two Of My Little Experiment

                    Sleep

                    Didn't sleep all night again, but I fell asleep at around 7 am and woke up at 12pm, then I fell asleep on the sofa from 3 pm to 5pm. Aaand it's 4 am again and I'm not sleepy at all. Maybe i should try and stay up until tonight.

                    Exercise
                    1) Walking
                    ~2 hours
                    ~7 miles
                    2) Fitness Blender
                    http://www.fitnessblender.com/v/work...ody-Toning/e3/
                    http://www.fitnessblender.com/v/work...re-Workout/ej/
                    http://www.fitnessblender.com/v/work...ch-Routine/dp/
                    Performance was still a bit wonky today, but I just took longer breaks. As much as I love FB videos, I just miss heavy lifting give me a baaarbelllll!
                    Aaaand there was a kind of stabbing pain in the front of my knee while i was walking. It went away pretty fast, but I'm a little worried.

                    Food
                    Meal one: 5 dates and 2 eggs, sunny-side up, cooked in butter
                    Meal two: Spinach and beef stew + white rice and mini salad
                    Snacks: Walnuts and dates
                    Drinks: Coffee with milk
                    Calories: ~1200

                    Thoughts and Stuff
                    Skin is definitely clearing up, and the chest pains and nausea are getting better. Clean eating seems to be working like I wanted it to! Also feeling a lot less like an emotional tornado. BMs are getting a lot more regular.

                    I woke up today and the corner of the whites of my left eye were actually swollen. I didn't know that was even possible. And i could feel it when i blinked and it was a bit itchy and super red. It's mostly cleared up now, so i'm thinking it must've been an allergic reaction to dust or something.

                    Off of physical stuff, i feel so detached from my friends back here. I can see just how different the paths we took are. Most of them have invested their entire attention to partying and frivolous things I just don't care for. I'm just not interested in that sort of scene. Is it so bad that I'd rather just go to a coffee or tea shop or anywhere we can just hang out and talk? Or a movie or something.
                    A group of them were planning a get together and they didn't invite me. I felt like maybe it would've been more normal to be upset about it, but I only thought 'huh...meh'. I came to visit over 6 months ago and i saw them literally everyday for 2-3 weeks. I know if I tried to see them or asked them to do something they'd be all for it, but like I said, i feel so detached from it all. Kind of like I'm just witnessing pieces of my old life.

                    Anyyhooo, check out this freaky not so little bugger:
                    http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eh_HUIJkRzU

                    Question Of The Day
                    If you really loved someone, and you and him/her had opposing views on having children, and it got to a point where it was definitely going to be a breaking point, what would you do? Sacrifice what you want, or let them go?

                    Well I rose and I rose, and I paid less time, to your callous mind, and I wished you well as you cut me down.
                    Last edited by Driedmango; 07-15-2013, 05:36 PM.
                    Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by CiKi90
                      Well, yeah, I suppose you're right about the PT thing ... I wouldn't necessarily hire a woman to train me juuuust because she was huge. Actually, now that I think about it, I probably wouldn't hire a female bodybuilder because that isn't my fitness goal, ya know? Also, today I told my mom & dad, and my bf's mom about my thoughts about being a personal trainer. I think voicing it is kinda making it a little bit more real. ;D

                      Is your knee pain in the joint, or the muscle, or are you unsure? Maybe you should take some glucosamine for your joints, for a little while so that you don't screw up your joints royally! I've heard gelatin will help with joint pain, too, but I haven't really seen very many benefits from it, personally.

                      I've seen every episode of SS vs. SS, too, buuuuut I'm not allowed to watch shows like that because it's kind of triggering in an ED sorta way. I try to not let things get to me like that, but, you know, I can't help it really. But I totally love those shows and I'd watch them if I could! Except that woman, Anna, on the SSvs.SS show. She kind of annoyed me. :P

                      Regarding your friends back home: I know exactlyyyy what you mean. Since I moved away from my hometown 4+ years ago, I experienced this for a little while when I'd go back to visit. They were all still kind of like, "stuck" in the past, the way that I used to be, but it felt like I'd moved on with my life. I mean, I know they've changed too, but I guess being home seems so nostalgic that you get the feeling that you're living in the past again? I don't know, it's weird. Also, sad to say this, but I really don't talk to hardly any of my friends back home, just because our priorities are mostly different. Last time I was there, I only saw a couple friends, and it was prettyyyy awkward.

                      QOTD: Since I don't ever want to get into a legally-binding contract -- AKA marriage-- or have children ever, I would definitely not sway on my views JUST for the sake of my partner. I know that getting married and having children are definitely just not in the cards for me, and I wouldn't want to get that involved in something that I would regret. It wouldn't be fair to my partner, or future children. I would much rather find someone else who reallllly didn't want kids or marriage, and allow two people that really DID want kids and marriage, to be happy together. ^__^

                      BTW, I really hope you're feeling better. Sounds like you're falling apart over there <3 hugs
                      That's great! I'm hoping your "good news" is that your PT thing worked out, or something similar.

                      The pain kind of feels like it's just smack in the middle of the kneecap. Don't know how to describe it any better.

                      The friend thing sounds exactly like my situation. It's pretty weird, because I want our relationships to be like they always were, but it's just awkward and stuff.

                      I am feeling better, I think!
                      Last edited by Driedmango; 07-16-2013, 08:43 PM.
                      Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

                      Comment


                      • Tuesday, 16th July 2013

                        Day Three Of My Little Experiment

                        Sleep

                        Didn't sleep at night, but slept from 9am - 4pm (i actually woke up a lot during that, though)

                        Exercise

                        1)Walking
                        ~2 hours
                        ~7 miles
                        2)Fitness Blender
                        Yoga Cardio Blend - Yoga Inspired Cardio and Toning Workout - Fitness Blender
                        At Home Upper Body Workout - Comprehensive Superset Upper Body Workout - Fitness Blender
                        3)Sprints!
                        I felt sooooo good after my sprints. Definitely need to keep this up. I did 30 mins total, with 30 second sprints and 90 second "rests". So 15 "sets".

                        Food
                        Meal One: 2 Hardboiled eggs + feta cheese + 2 slices of turkey
                        Meal Two: Biryani (do people actually know what that is?)
                        Snacks: Dates, walnuts and a plum
                        Calories: ~1200

                        Thoughts and Stuff

                        I keep rambling here and deleting it. Can't seem to think straight. Maybe tomorrow
                        Last edited by Driedmango; 07-16-2013, 08:09 PM.
                        Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

                        Comment


                        • Hey lady, Just popping in to say hello I was in a rush when you posted in my journal the other day, so forgot to welcome you in! I've actually been reading bits of your story all over the place but I'm not up to date: how's your recovery going? Are you still in Dubai? Hope all's well!
                          "I think the basic anti-aging diet is also the best diet for prevention and treatment of diabetes, scleroderma, and the various "connective tissue diseases." This would emphasize high protein, low unsaturated fats, low iron, and high antioxidant consumption, with a moderate or low starch consumption.

                          In practice, this means that a major part of the diet should be milk, cheese, eggs, shellfish, fruits and coconut oil, with vitamin E and salt as the safest supplements."

                          - Ray Peat

                          Comment


                          • Originally posted by CiKi90
                            I totally know what biryani is, and I friggin' love it! I'm so jealous that you had some, actually, because I haven't eaten it in such a long time! Maybe I should just make a pot of my own, with cauliflower rice instead ... I've never tried making it! Have you ever had Persian Wedding rice? it's not really the same, except that it's a rice dish with dried fruit in it, but it's one of my favs, too.

                            Re: your knee, maybe just try to massage at it and keep it flexible for a little while. I know how bothersome sore joints can be! Although I guess you're feeling better since you did sprints today? I did an HIIT sprinting thing the other day, and it felt amazing, too!
                            Haha do you not react well to all kinds of rice? My mom makes a killerrrr biryani. I know how to make it, but I've never actually tried. I haven't tried that, but it actually sounds really good. I wanna try that now

                            It's weird with my knee - it never hurts when i run. It's just kind of stiff and achey when i bend it (like when i do my first few squats). It makes me think of a creaky hinge that needs to be lubricated or something. That stabbing pain only seems to show up when i speed walk. I genuinely dont get how it went from 0 pain one day, to this massive aching though!

                            I am loooving sprints. They give me such a weird high!
                            Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by YogaBare View Post
                              Hey lady, Just popping in to say hello I was in a rush when you posted in my journal the other day, so forgot to welcome you in! I've actually been reading bits of your story all over the place but I'm not up to date: how's your recovery going? Are you still in Dubai? Hope all's well!
                              Hello pretty lady! Thank you for welcoming me in, and welcome to mine! I've actually read quite a bit of your journal - super impressive that you were so willing to experiment and get better.
                              About my recovery, I actually feel reallyyy good (in my mentality about food etc.) for the first time in a long time. I've had a bajillion health problems recently, and i think it's taken my attention off of 'omg gonna get fat' to 'ah i dont think this processed junk is going to make me feel better' a bit.
                              I am in Dubai! But i reallyyy miss Montreal, which I wasn't expecting.

                              I'd be super happy to have your insight/input here, since you've been through all this already!
                              Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by CiKi90
                                I react just fine to rice, actually, but it's the mentality that I'm getting more veggies in & less calories if I make cauliflower rice, you know? Plus I can have a huuuuge serving of cauliflower rice versus just a tiny bit of regular rice. Idk. I'm weird.

                                If you can, try to get some glucosamine for your joints. It really helps the joints stay "lubricated." lol.

                                Yeah, I know what you mean about loving sprints. I used to never understand "runner's high" or anything like that, but I totally do now! I wish I could run outdoors, in the grass, though. When I was running and playing Frisbee the other day, the sensation of running was so different than being inside on a gym machine. Much more euphoric! Sadly, though, the area around my house is a sketchy neighborhood with lots of hills. Unpleasant.
                                Nawh it's not weird, really. In general, i don't eat rice. I dont feel i gain anything from it (nutrient-wise). But it just smelled sooo good! I would probably make cauliflower rice instead too, if it was me who was cooking.

                                Funnily enough, that guy from my building had told me to get some glucosamine before I left.

                                I would love to run outdoors as well! I live smack in the middle of downtown, so it's not really an option for me, either.
                                Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

                                Comment

                                Working...
                                X