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A Work in Progress: Finding the Right Balance (firetiger)

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  • #16
    Originally posted by namelesswonder View Post
    What about going for something like a sweet potato or fruit instead of the more condensed sweets (chocolate & ice cream)? None of those things are bad to be eating anyway, but seeing them os off-limits is probably going to cause more problems while you're trying to avoid them. I know it sounds counter-intuitive. I had to allow myself super wheaty things (like pizza and burgers with regular old buns) for a month or two on the weekends before I felt really comfortable choosing not to have them. I knew they would make me feel bad, but I still wanted to eat them.

    If dairy doesn't bother your digestion, I see no reason why you shouldn't be eating it.
    You bring up a good point. My carbs yesterday were very low for me at around 50 g. I am keeping track occasionally to gauge my foods. I am not trying to be super restrictive but maybe a bit more fruit wouldn't hurt. I'm making potato salad of sorts for a party today so I will eat some potatoes. If I stay up late (which I really have no need to do anymore) I tend to get hungry because well, many hours have passed since I last ate. I should have grabbed one of my trail mix baggies of nuts & a few dried cherries & called it good. Next time.
    Aren't we all just works in progress?

    Using primal as a tool to heal depression/anxiety & promote overall well-being:
    http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread84615.html

    Comment


    • #17
      Just call it a cheat day...

      My eating was super disordered today as I was feeling really hopeless about being hopeless (haha) for forever. I feel better now after some serenity yoga & Game of Thrones viewing party with friends. I ate lots of crap at the party including: cheese/sausage, meatballs (made with breadcrumbs), asparagus, a bite of cake & champagne with juices. I'm calling it a cheat evening (it wasn't that bad) & not feeling guilty. Back on it tomorrow...

      I am still absolutely dreading my appointment with my psychiatrist tomorrow. I will express my concerns & goals & see what he says. I know he's going to want to up the Wellbutrin dosage since I have seemingly plateaued. *crosses fingers that he's open-minded/understanding*

      It's supposed to be nice so I am going to enjoy my last few unemployed days laying by the pool with a good book.
      Aren't we all just works in progress?

      Using primal as a tool to heal depression/anxiety & promote overall well-being:
      http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread84615.html

      Comment


      • #18
        Figuring things out but still disordered eating patterns

        So my psychiatrist did up my Wellbutrin to 300 mg. We had a nice visit & we both really want me to get better, actually better not just a response to medication. I am still looking at this as a temporary thing. Once I start to feel better then I will consider cutting it. I am still going to take the 5-HTP twice a day (lunch & dinner). I also added 1000 iu vitamin D; it's not going to hurt anything even if I do get sun. I also may take some B-complex. These are in addition to the fish oil & multivitamin I already take.

        I am also going to discontinue my birth control pill. I have been on BC since I was 16 (irregular cycle) and since I have sworn off men (they cause me more problems than they are worth) it seems like an okay decision. I'm a little worried though that I will have mood swings...but maybe it will be the other way around. I also read that they can make you retain water so maybe I will retain less. *crosses fingers*

        My eating today has been less than ideal. I have not planned well. Oops.

        9:00
        B: 2 hb eggs & 1 oz smoked salmon & a strawberry

        11:00
        B part 2: leftover turkey meatballs in a tomato sauce with diced tomatoes

        2:00
        some of the homemade german potato salad I made. It's almost paleo; had to use real mayo because the homemade did not turn out (DO NOT USE EVOO) so it has soybean oil.

        I will make myself eat lunch soonish & have a late dinner.
        Aren't we all just works in progress?

        Using primal as a tool to heal depression/anxiety & promote overall well-being:
        http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread84615.html

        Comment


        • #19
          Tattoo & chicken thighs

          So I got my first tattoo. It's an Andean cross on my shoulder. I love it! I feel pretty upbeat today after the meeting with my psychiatrist & getting the tattoo. I had a lot of anxiety about it so it felt like I was conquering a fear. Eating still mehhhhh. I did cook a bunch of chicken thighs.

          3:30
          Sardines in tomato sauce, radishes

          6:00
          Banana: I needed something before the tattoo in my stomach; was worried I might pass out. No need for the worry.

          8:30
          D: Chicken thighs pan fried & baked in pasture butter, some of my german potato salad & cucumber/radish salad

          Food lesson: Plan better. I need to go grocery shopping with a mission. I need to pair proteins with a veggie for lunch & dinner each day. I like improvising but it makes it easier to eat poorly.
          Aren't we all just works in progress?

          Using primal as a tool to heal depression/anxiety & promote overall well-being:
          http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread84615.html

          Comment


          • #20
            Woohoo tattoos! Congrats
            Depression Lies

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            • #21
              Still feeling pretty upbeat & meal planning

              Thoughts: I woke up this morning still feeling pretty good. I'm not sure if it's the supplements (could be, right?) or the lower stress-load of no-school (more likely). I worry that I will get to a good place this summer only to have it go back to shit in the fall when classes resume. I'm calling my doc today to schedule an appointment where we can talk about getting some blood tests & hormone problems, etc. I am stopping my birth control pill today. It just makes sense to me now; if I am trying to avoid getting hormones from animal meat then why am I feeding them to myself? Now I can watch as my own natural cycle kicks in.

              I have realized the distinct need to tediously plan out my weekly meals to avoid multiple grocery store trips & poor food choices. Breakfast I'm usually good with eggs, a green smoothie so that leaves lunches/dinners & some snacks. I can say that I will eat a salad every day for lunch but sometimes my body or mind does not want a salad every day so I need backups. I will need a protein & veg for each meal. I really like spontaneity in eating but this leads to bad decisions.

              Food:
              8:30
              B: 2 eggs fried in pasture butter & 2 oz chicken thigh & green smoothie (1/3 can coco milk & greens powder)

              Supps: 300 mg Wellbutrin, multi, 1000 iu vit D, fish oil

              Sleep: Had a bit of trouble falling to sleep because I was trying not to lay on my tattoo I think. When I was a child/adolescent/teen i had so much trouble falling asleep that it would take like 4 hours. Now if it takes 20 minutes so be it. Fell asleep around 11:30. I woke up in the middle of the night for a second with some night sweats & immediately fell back asleep. Woke up around 7ish & got out of bed around 8ish. Feel super rested.
              Aren't we all just works in progress?

              Using primal as a tool to heal depression/anxiety & promote overall well-being:
              http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread84615.html

              Comment


              • #22
                In response to something you said here or in another thread: my anxiety definitely has been life-long, but my depression didn't start until after puberty. My sleep problems are life-long too. My parents used to have a hard time getting me to sleep and I remember it taking hours for me to fall asleep up until my college years. At that point, I was busy enough to fall asleep within an hour, but with 5-HTP and good sleep schedules, I fall asleep within 20 minutes.
                Depression Lies

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                • #23
                  Originally posted by namelesswonder View Post
                  In response to something you said here or in another thread: my anxiety definitely has been life-long, but my depression didn't start until after puberty. My sleep problems are life-long too. My parents used to have a hard time getting me to sleep and I remember it taking hours for me to fall asleep up until my college years. At that point, I was busy enough to fall asleep within an hour, but with 5-HTP and good sleep schedules, I fall asleep within 20 minutes.
                  My inner critic aka that voice that tell you that you are never good enough has been around since I can remember. I can remember times of being so disappointed for not meeting high expectations even at early age. For example, I was the best speller in 3rd grade; i got out first round on a technicality spelled the wrong "fourth." I was absolutely devastated. That was 4th grade & it only got worse from there, never good enough in anything.
                  Aren't we all just works in progress?

                  Using primal as a tool to heal depression/anxiety & promote overall well-being:
                  http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread84615.html

                  Comment


                  • #24
                    Great night!

                    Thoughts: Tonight was a grad school end of year party. Normally I'd get super anxious about going to these things but was surprisingly calm & super upbeat. My friends noticed; I noticed. I restrained myself for the food allowing for a nibble of pure cheese & none of the sweets or fried chicken (NOLA for you). I had 3 glasses of wine, a shot & a cider. i'll allow that to be my 20%. It was so much fun. I only hope I can continue this mood. First day of work tomorrow. Also I made a chart planning out each meal of the week with a protein & veg at each. The fat is given for cooking.

                    Food:
                    1:00
                    L: 5 oz salmon fried in coco oil & frozen broccoli

                    3:30
                    S: small amount of dark chocolate dipped in 1 tbsp almond butter
                    baby square of ritter chocolate (my roommate does not get it!)

                    7:00
                    D: Chicken thigh with side salad (baby romaine, yellow pepper, 4 blackberries & balsamic/olive oil

                    8:00-12:00: 2 glasses red wine, few cubes cheese, 1 glass red wine, 1 shot, cider
                    Aren't we all just works in progress?

                    Using primal as a tool to heal depression/anxiety & promote overall well-being:
                    http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread84615.html

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Feeling sick & the last thing I want is anything paleo

                      Thoughts: I started my first day of work yesterday. I am going to really like the job but it will be stressful until I get everything figured out. The work environment is super friendly but they eat out EVERY day. I tried to say I can't afford to eat out every day & they bought my lunch. I said okay well I guess I can do one day a week. The job involves a lot of traveling in a car so I might get a mini cooler or something for snacks.

                      I felt super ill yesterday afternoon: super nauseous & terrible headache. I don't know what it's from. I ate out with them but I had rotisserie chicken leg & steamed broccoli (at a niceish restaurant). So I basically ate nothing from then on. Nothing sounds good, especially meat or eggs. This morning I had a banana with almond butter. I feel a bit better but no appetite.

                      Food:
                      8:30
                      banana dipped in almond butter
                      Aren't we all just works in progress?

                      Using primal as a tool to heal depression/anxiety & promote overall well-being:
                      http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread84615.html

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        I hope your appetite comes back and you feel better soon. When I feel sick like that, I stick to things that sound appealing from within a primal spectrum (like bananas and almond butter ) and screw getting ratios right. Last time I was seriously sick, I had a major craving for oranges, so I ate 4-5 every day and even if I didn't recuperate faster, I felt a lot better just treating myself.
                        Depression Lies

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                        • #27
                          Originally posted by namelesswonder View Post
                          I hope your appetite comes back and you feel better soon. When I feel sick like that, I stick to things that sound appealing from within a primal spectrum (like bananas and almond butter ) and screw getting ratios right. Last time I was seriously sick, I had a major craving for oranges, so I ate 4-5 every day and even if I didn't recuperate faster, I felt a lot better just treating myself.
                          Yeah, I just needed some energy & nothing sounded good. I ate like 2 bananas with almond butter & some cashews, almonds & dried cherry homemade trail mix. Oranges make sense because of the Vit C right?
                          Aren't we all just works in progress?

                          Using primal as a tool to heal depression/anxiety & promote overall well-being:
                          http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread84615.html

                          Comment


                          • #28
                            That's what I figured!
                            Depression Lies

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                            • #29
                              Falling off the wagon & peer pressure

                              Thoughts: I am falling off the wagon. I'm not completely off but headed that way. The new job, no yoga/exercise (b/c of the tattoo), friends' birthdays. I need to learn how to appropriately deal with peer pressure. It's freaking hard to break social norms. I want/need to bond with my new coworkers but I cannot eat out every day. I don't want to. It's expensive & generally unhealthy. I told them I could do it like once a week. I am going to be in my car heading to participants in the study's houses & need portable things. I may invest in a small cooler to keep refrigerated snacks in.

                              Food:
                              8:30
                              B: banana with almond butter

                              12:15
                              L: banana with almond butter

                              3:00
                              S: almonds, cashews dried cherries

                              7:00
                              D: arugala salad with manchego cheese, almond slivers, oil based dressing, pears

                              8:30
                              Drinks: 2 12 oz daiquiris (ooooohhhh NOLA. These were my first since I've here & my last. It was buy one, get one & my friend's bday)

                              Back on it today...
                              Aren't we all just works in progress?

                              Using primal as a tool to heal depression/anxiety & promote overall well-being:
                              http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread84615.html

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                I know you aren't asking for suggestions, but would you mind me making a few (friendly) observations? Your entries indicate you've struggled with sugar, etc., and anxiety/depression. I too favor sugar...
                                Reading what you eat (I'm not in a position to make any suggestions about wellbutrin, etc,...these are just n=1 thoughts), it seems you still eat a lot of sugar, just in the form of fruits, etc. And you don't really eat much in the way of variety in protein: eggs, a little fish, a little lean meat (turkey burger, etc).

                                Since you've been struggling with staying on track, you might try playing around a bit with the carbs/protein mix. Sometimes, for some of us, carbs like potatoes, fruit, etc, actually triggers sugar-cravings. You might TRY (for a week or two) lowering the carbs and REALLY upping the protein (meat, that is) and see if that helps dial back the cravings... It may not be a long term thing but it might give you insight into which things do trigger for you and which you can deal with.

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