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B*tchapalooza 2013

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  • Lol. I like your posts. The autocorrects are hilarious.

    I have also had battles with fruit flies! They appear like popcorn from around the sink or any left over food/fruit in this heat. Here in California it's in the 90's and 100's in some areas. I, also, contend with sweltering moments from within if you know what I mean. It's a heat sandwich. Ugh.

    I'm identifying with the labor on food eats that turn into treats. Usually only I can eat my cooking, but, it's getting better as I learn the better ways to cook stuff. Not brave enough to try offal, yet. Have and do eat tripe - menudo.
    And liver…..sigh…..bad childhood memories of chewy erasers. Oh, Goldie! I can't wait to try your naan flat bread recipe!!!!

    These last pics give new meaning to food porn!
    “Never let the perfect be the enemy of the good”. - Popular translation of Voltaire

    If you are honest with your lacks, BE honest with your abundance, as well.


    "....the route finding part, and dead reckoning - figure out where I need to be and how to get there, then stay on target as I move over the land and through the forest."
    - Originally Posted by Meant2Move

    Comment


    • Originally posted by ssn679doc View Post
      I sometimes have an obtuse point of view...
      I've seen pics of you, and you're... well... uh... cute!

      Originally posted by Goldie View Post
      In today's Utah news:

      She's being charged with arson? She should be charged with bacon abuse!
      LOL! Maybe someday there will be a paleo sitcom and that will be a skit.

      Originally posted by The Walrus View Post
      Who would think chicken wings could be NSFW?
      Oops - sorry about that. I should post warnings.

      Originally posted by HeuristicFireFlower View Post
      Lol. I like your posts. The autocorrects are hilarious.

      I have also had battles with fruit flies! They appear like popcorn from around the sink or any left over food/fruit in this heat. Here in California it's in the 90's and 100's in some areas. I, also, contend with sweltering moments from within if you know what I mean. It's a heat sandwich. Ugh.

      I'm identifying with the labor on food eats that turn into treats. Usually only I can eat my cooking, but, it's getting better as I learn the better ways to cook stuff. Not brave enough to try offal, yet. Have and do eat tripe - menudo.
      And liver…..sigh…..bad childhood memories of chewy erasers. Oh, Goldie! I can't wait to try your naan flat bread recipe!!!!

      These last pics give new meaning to food porn!
      Chuckling at "only I can eat my cooking." I think I'm starting to be eccentric in my tastes. Not a lot of people I know would eat a burger topped with pepper jelly, butter, and an egg. So I'm kind of going in reverse; people who once liked my cooking would probably call in a 5150 if they saw some of the things I've eaten lately.
      "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

      B*tch-lite

      Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

      Comment


      • Stormy weather...

        Being a lover of meat in tube form, sometimes it can be tricky to find a nice spicy sausage not filled with garbage "food" to eat with my fingers. So, I was happy to find a very local source for a pork and shrimp sausage that is perfect for dipping into a little horse radish mustard, or even just by itself with a little mozzarella melted on top. When I saw the packages, I figured once I looked at the ingredients, I'd be repulsed. The first two ingredients are pork and shrimp, then some red pepper and onion, and all the rest seem okay also. They do use the word "spices," but I'm hoping that doesn't hide much. And there is dextrose toward the end of the list. The brand is "Louisiana's Very Own Cajun Grill," in tiny little letters in one corner of the package. The moral of the story is: The liquor store carries two kinds of sausage and one is this one; Whole Foods carries about seven kinds at the meat counter, and last time I was there, there was only one I'd eat.

        Sometimes I get negative about NOLA, but coming from a state where the liquor stores are only liquor stores (with the accoutrements of drinking like mixers and bitters, etc.), I have to say that being able to pick up a hunk of cheese or a sausage when one goes to buy hooch is pretty convenient.

        Without going too far into TMI territory, I'm beginning to wonder how so many people eat so much produce. I've never been a big veggie eater, though I use what I consider to be a reasonable amount. Root veggies, tomato, mushrooms, peppers, the occasional squash or eggplant, spinach in eggs or soups, etc. But for a couple of days, I was really in the mood for veggies and more fruit than usual. Yikes on the bathroom experience! If Grok pooped like that, he'd have never had time to hunt.

        In the news (aka The World's Gone Mad). A nine year old accidentally killed an instructor at a shooting range. FFS. Humans are more closely related to flies and worms than previously thought, genome studes suggest : SCIENCE : Tech Times - Color me surprised. I've known quite a number of people that reminded me of worms. Environmentalists, conservatives battle over whether manatees are 'endangered' or 'threatened' - Geeks battling it out as to whether the FL manatee (a two thousand pound cutey) should be classified "threatened," or "endangered." If only the fucktards that hurt them with their speed boats were "threatened" or "endangered." Ebola Virus Outbreak 2014: Experimental Vaccine To Begin Trials Next Week : News : Headlines & Global News - Gotta give ebola credit - it's been in the news for weeks.

        It's so overcast (which I love) and thundery, that at 130pm, it looks like it's almost sundown.


        The gallery:










        Get away from me with that thing!




        Peace, love, and gorgeous overcast days,
        J
        "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

        B*tch-lite

        Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

        Comment


        • well if you're gonna insert something that big into your vagina, it IS best to do it slowly
          beautiful
          yeah you are

          Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
          lol

          Comment


          • Originally posted by JoanieL View Post
            Being a lover of meat in tube form,
            O nearly choked reading this


            Sent from my iPhone using Marks Daily Apple Forum

            Comment


            • Poor puppy....

              If you are inserting something THAT big into your vagina... I really don't want to know
              Some people just need a sympathetic pat... On the head... With a hammer.

              Comment


              • Originally posted by ssn679doc View Post
                O nearly choked reading this.
                Lovers of meat in tube form sometimes suffer from something similar, I've heard.
                I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

                Comment


                • Originally posted by badgergirl View Post
                  Lovers of meat in tube form sometimes suffer from something similar, I've heard.
                  You guys crack me up!

                  Comment


                  • Does meat come in another form?
                    My journal - The Walrus: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread108103.html

                    Be silly, be honest, be kind. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by The Walrus View Post
                      Does meat come in another form?
                      Good point


                      Sent from my iPhone using Marks Daily Apple Forum

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
                        well if you're gonna insert something that big into your vagina, it IS best to do it slowly
                        Originally posted by AuroraB View Post
                        Poor puppy....

                        If you are inserting something THAT big into your vagina... I really don't want to know
                        One reason I never had babies was the thought of pushing an eight pound human out of my vagina. Not. This. Vagina.

                        Originally posted by ssn679doc View Post
                        O nearly choked reading this
                        Originally posted by badgergirl View Post
                        Lovers of meat in tube form sometimes suffer from something similar, I've heard.
                        Originally posted by Goldie View Post
                        You guys crack me up!
                        Originally posted by The Walrus View Post
                        Does meat come in another form?
                        Originally posted by ssn679doc View Post
                        Good point
                        Suuurre... I make an innocent comment about sausage and you all go straight to sex. I love you guyses!
                        "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                        B*tch-lite

                        Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

                        Comment


                        • Saturday, August 30, 2014

                          I had an idea this morning. What if I took how I ate when I was losing a lot of weight, way before paleo/primal/cavedude/gluten kills/et freakin' cetera, came into my life and put it into Cronometer? Be aware that all I "knew" back then was the following:

                          1. I needed to lose over 100 pounds.
                          2. Working with 1000 calories per day was damn near impossible, but 1200 gave me some leeway, and I could work with that.
                          3. Having been sort of indoctrinated by M&F magazine in the '80s, I had a healthy respect for protein.
                          4. The only way this was going to work, since I knew it would take at least a year (it ended up taking 15 months to lose 118 pounds - half my body weight), was to be able to incorporate my favorite foods on a regular basis: hamburgers, salmon and rice, chicken and rice, pork chops and mashed potatoes, and a small dessert/snack before bed.
                          5. No one else's "diet" plan had ever worked for me. I didn't/don't like eating breakfast. Lunch was mostly to stop the rumblings and could be something small like two hardboiled eggs smashed with some diet mayo or half 'n' half and black pepper. I didn't/don't like feeling restricted for dinner/supper.
                          6. Just "eating what I wanted" never worked for me and always got me overweight. I kept a meal plan and food log in a simple steno book.
                          7. I needed to choose an exercise that a person twice the size she should be could actually do. I chose walking. I still think walking is the best thing a person can do for themselves exercise wise.

                          Here's an example of a burger day:

                          *Cronometer didn't have diet ice cream or diet bread in their data base, so I just diddled with the calories on the closest thing they had to those.

                          What surprises me about this is how the macros landed. Even though I kept what I considered "low fat," by using 95/5 ground beef, chicken without skin, the leanest cuts of pork, and vegan mayonnaise, my ratios were: P: 30%, C: 21%, F: 49%.

                          Also, without really trying, and just by having in my head, "Protein good; eat meat and eggs," I got 87 grams of protein. Not bad for a woman not consciously trying to put on muscle. And the profile probably wouldn't change that much on chicken/fish/pork days because substituting for the diet bread used for the burgers were rice and potatoes, and I weighed and measured everything (as I do now for maintenance). The profile would change for weekend days because when I was doing that plan, I gave myself 3000 calories to eat on the weekend, split however I wanted it, and I often chose to do a 2000 calorie cheese day balanced by a 1000 calorie "eggs for supper" day.

                          A note on all that half 'n' half: I used to drink drip coffee throughout the day, so I'd always budget 2 tblsp of half 'n' half per cup for five cups. If I drank all that coffee now, I could probably learn to fly. I now drink 1-3 mugs of espresso per day with half a tablespoon of butter or coconut oil. Drinking only one mug is as rare as drinking three, so I really do probably average two mugs per day.

                          Conclusion: I'm back to keeping my own counsel. I'm going to change up that style of eating to 1500 calories a day which seems to keep me at between 135 and 145 if I don't exercise as much as I should. I'll ditch the ice cream, which I no longer have the taste for, and probably make protein shake/fruit smoothies instead. I'm bringing back the vegan "mayonnaise" as part of my 20. And I'm going to incorporate that sour dough bread back in for burger days (also I guess part of my 20). I'm absolutely still sticking with grass fed/pastured for beef products, dairy, and butter. I'll get farm eggs when available. I'll never eat farmed fin fish (icky ca ca), though farmed bivalves aren't disgusting. I'll make sure that my chicken and pork are at least antibiotic-free, and get farmed whenever possible at a reasonable price (IOW, I'm not paying $6/lb for chicken, nor $8/lb for pork).

                          The thing is, after two years, I'm still sandwich girl. A burger without a bread container, even if it's sliced sourdough or an english muffin (I won't go back to diet bread because yikes on the list of chemicals) isn't satisfying. The thought of never eating a muffaletta again, or an Italian sub, or even my most disgusting once a year splurge of bologna and domestic provolone with gobs of mayo on a roll or bagel makes me sad. It makes me feel deprived. 15 months eating as I did above which was some pretty restricted calories never made me feel deprived. And for me, deprivation leads to obsession, and obsession leads to failure.

                          IOW, The Bitch is Back - and she's done listening to gurus, bros, and any other "expert" on how she should eat. Which doesn't mean that I'm not thankful to have learned what I've learned. Learning about CAFOs, sleep deprivation, sunlight, and bone broth were awesome things to learn. Things like beans, tofu, etc., weren't really much of my diet anyway (though I did make a nice tofu/garlic dip that I liked with diet crackers), so I'm not going to be diving into big vats of bean chili or soup anytime soon. And I won't be shopping the diet aisle or eating horrifying amounts of hormones and antibiotics. I'm just going back to eating Joanie's Plan.

                          As a(nother) note, everytime I see someone tell a fat woman to eat more calories, I want to reach through my computer and grab them by the throat and squeeze.


                          The gallery:






                          This poor soul never saw his girlfriend again.
                          Autocorrect ruins lives!



                          Warning: Food Porn below!





                          Just one reason most people love dogs.


                          Peace, love, and thanks for reading my boring, need-to-put-this-in-writing post,
                          J
                          "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                          B*tch-lite

                          Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

                          Comment


                          • Well i know why you call it food porn....


                            Sent from my iPhone using Marks Daily Apple Forum

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by ssn679doc View Post
                              Well i know why you call it food porn....
                              LOL! I have a chicken in bondage pic that I'm a little afraid to post.
                              "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                              B*tch-lite

                              Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by JoanieL View Post
                                LOL! I have a chicken in bondage pic that I'm a little afraid to post.
                                Probably a good thing... Lol


                                Sent from my iPhone using Marks Daily Apple Forum

                                Comment

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