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Primal Journal: NZ Suse

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  • em, dont listen to zoe, or at least read back over her journal where she complains about the cold wellington is lovely, on a nice day but man its a bitch otherwise. auckland's the place to be and its where all the jobs are!

    I have had an INTERESTING weekend. my sis and I went down to visit my mum and talk about her finances and get her to hand over the reins of her finances without us having to invoke her enduring power of attorney in a really bad way. she was fine about it... kind of surprising really but she is old and very confused (she has dementia) and my brothers are FUCKING RIPPING HER OFF! oops sorry did I just shout. lets just say that I have come home realising that both my brothers are basically lying manipulating FUCKING SHITS...(sorry did it again) Yeah I'm feeling a bit cross, maybe they're not quite that bad but stuff came up that I have realised is not pretty. and I can tell you its going to get ugly in the next week or so as I take control of all mum's bank acccounts and FUCKING LET RIP AT HER LAWYER who has not given her good advice and is basically in a conflict of interest in representing my brother at the same time! (sorry I cant help myself but you can get the idea i'm feeling pretty angry huh)

    anyway I have had a lot of wine this weekend, food has been mostly good if you dont count the kentucky fried for lunch today on the trip home, but it was only 1 crispy chicken breast strip and some fries so I dont think that was out of control. Clearly I'm not going to commit to any alcohol free days over the next few days as I am going to be needing to do a lot of venting. There wont be any weight loss or fat loss I'm thinking as my cortisol levels must be way up there!

    I just basically feel disappointed. sad. angry. annoyed. add any other adjectives you can think of.

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    • Originally posted by Suse View Post
      I have had an INTERESTING weekend. my sis and I went down to visit my mum and talk about her finances and get her to hand over the reins of her finances without us having to invoke her enduring power of attorney in a really bad way. she was fine about it... kind of surprising really
      This is good

      Originally posted by Suse View Post
      but she is old and very confused (she has dementia) and my brothers are FUCKING RIPPING HER OFF! oops sorry did I just shout. lets just say that I have come home realising that both my brothers are basically lying manipulating FUCKING SHITS...(sorry did it again) Yeah I'm feeling a bit cross, maybe they're not quite that bad but stuff came up that I have realised is not pretty. and I can tell you its going to get ugly in the next week or so as I take control of all mum's bank acccounts and FUCKING LET RIP AT HER LAWYER who has not given her good advice and is basically in a conflict of interest in representing my brother at the same time! (sorry I cant help myself but you can get the idea i'm feeling pretty angry huh)
      This is NOT

      Originally posted by Suse View Post
      anyway I have had a lot of wine this weekend, food has been mostly good if you dont count the kentucky fried for lunch today on the trip home, but it was only 1 crispy chicken breast strip and some fries so I dont think that was out of control. Clearly I'm not going to commit to any alcohol free days over the next few days as I am going to be needing to do a lot of venting. There wont be any weight loss or fat loss I'm thinking as my cortisol levels must be way up there!

      I just basically feel disappointed. sad. angry. annoyed. add any other adjectives you can think of.
      {{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}
      "Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." Kurt Vonnegut
      "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." Douglas Adams
      "Moderation sucks." Suse
      "Wine is a vegetable." Meaty
      "Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow and the day after that." Cmdr Chris Hadfield


      Winencandy

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      • i would say that the biggest issue with wellington is that the weather is "flat" we don't get hot or cold. it's just constantly "chilly." that is, always like spring or fall. there are a number of days that get really warm and nice, but i don't think one can sunbathe on the beach here. at least, i can't. my son has no issue though. LOL my husband would probably be fine too.

        but, it's a nicer city.

        Auckland is all suburban sprawl. This is something that i consider a MAJOR disadvantage. you have to have a car there, and it's all spread out. i can't say it's where all the jobs are, but being the biggest city, there are likely more there than elsewhere.

        wellington is also a pretty little city (much smaller than auckland), lots of culture, lots of great food, and IMO, one of the best cities on earth. Of course, i also like copenhagen and stockholm, so i can do ok in human-sized larger cities. also, i think lonely planet called it the fourth best capital city on earth? see, yeah, it's good. and you can always travel for some heat. things are close here.

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        • ah zoe, when I lived there that's exactly how I felt. Until you move away you dont see the truth

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          • i've been to auckland. most nz's hate it even though most of them live there. it makes no sense. LOL

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            • Oh my goodness, there appears to be a turf war going on here. Maybe you can both weigh in on this...

              What I'm looking for is:
              1) Somewhere I can get a job, with nursing, that's pretty much anywhere unless it's really remote. Most places have surgeries or district hospitals.
              2) Somewhere I can buy a house with a good bit of land. I want to have a large area for vegetables, fruit and nut trees. I also want to keep chickens, a goat or two and maybe even a cow one day.
              3) Somewhere with mountains and lakes for hiking and kayaking (not that sort Zoe ).

              Those are the main requirements, now where do you think is the best place to live?


              Suse, so sorry to hear about your family troubles. I'm glad you and your sister are taking it all in hand, but I'm sorry that it's going to be such a stressful time for you.
              Your brothers will be pissed off, but in time I hope they will realise that you are doing the right thing. People don't really grow up until they stop relying on their mummy!
              My Journal

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              • That's really horrible about your brothers and your mum, sorry you're having to deal with all that crap. At least you seem to be taking control in a way that is in your mum's best interest, sucks that you have to deal with the brothers and the lawyer about all their nonsense. Might be a more stressful week(s) ahead, but no doubt it will work out in the end.

                How's today going? Hugs your way...
                My musings

                The old stuff

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                • Originally posted by NourishedEm View Post
                  Oh my goodness, there appears to be a turf war going on here. Maybe you can both weigh in on this...

                  What I'm looking for is:
                  1) Somewhere I can get a job, with nursing, that's pretty much anywhere unless it's really remote. Most places have surgeries or district hospitals.
                  2) Somewhere I can buy a house with a good bit of land. I want to have a large area for vegetables, fruit and nut trees. I also want to keep chickens, a goat or two and maybe even a cow one day.
                  3) Somewhere with mountains and lakes for hiking and kayaking (not that sort Zoe ).

                  Those are the main requirements, now where do you think is the best place to live?
                  Actually I think Nelson is probably where you would want to live, although land is expensive I think, but no more than auckland I expect. It has fabulous summers where its hot as and some great beaches, you're near enough to national parks, Abel Tasman for one, and you can do plenty of kayaking!!! both sorts! Winters are chilly there but not that bad. I can vouch for Nelson as it is an area I have lived in in the past.

                  Originally posted by NourishedEm View Post
                  Suse, so sorry to hear about your family troubles. I'm glad you and your sister are taking it all in hand, but I'm sorry that it's going to be such a stressful time for you.
                  Your brothers will be pissed off, but in time I hope they will realise that you are doing the right thing. People don't really grow up until they stop relying on their mummy!
                  Thanks, I really vented last night, I'd go back and delete a bit of that but now I've been quoted I've been out for lunch today and had a really good vent over a burger and a beer (whoa, so not primal) and feel much better for it! Have made a lot of inroads today into getting stuff sorted. There will be some ugly times ahead though, I dont doubt it.

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                  • thanks for the hugs ladies. Gawd, families, cant live with 'em, cant shoot 'em either!

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                    • Nelson is a really nice area, as i've been there several times. I think land everywhere in NZ is pretty pricey, but "lifestyle blocks" are easy to find pretty much everywhere (even outside of wellington).

                      It can be very sketchy, who may take over for an elder and how. people do nutsy things. my MIL was totally nuts with my GMIL a few years ago. it's settled out "for the best" now, but for the first year or two of the transition, it was . . . not great.

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by Suse View Post
                        Actually I think Nelson is probably where you would want to live, although land is expensive I think, but no more than auckland I expect. It has fabulous summers where its hot as and some great beaches, you're near enough to national parks, Abel Tasman for one, and you can do plenty of kayaking!!! both sorts! Winters are chilly there but not that bad. I can vouch for Nelson as it is an area I have lived in in the past.
                        Based on the prices I've seen in realestate.co.nz and taking the dollar conversion into account, prices are cheaper than in Perth, quite significantly. I'll have a look at Nelson, thanks!
                        My Journal

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                        • Nelson's always been a little bit "alternative" too, so saying you were primal there definitely wouldnt phase anyone!

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                          • another interesting day. some background, last year when someone ripped my mum off for thousands, this person bought a computer. There was some debate as to whether mum had loaned this woman the money for the computer so it wasnt included as part of the prosection by the police however it was returned. When we were down at the weekend, my sister and I asked "where is the computer" Brother 1 said it was in a box in the office and last he saw it, it was in my other brothers car. Asked other brother (brother 2) about it, knew nothing about it. Got a lot of very shifty signals off him though. Never had both brothers in the same room at once, would have made life a lot easier. Anyway there was confusion over whether it was a laptop or a desktop or what. Rang the police and they said it was a PC but a bit like a mac where the hardware is in the monitor, so I suppose in a box you could have thought oh thats a laptop. Whatever. emailed bro 2 when home, ok it wasnt a laptop, confusion on bro 1's part, but he said he saw the box in your carboot. Bro 2 says I HAVE NEVER SEEN ROSE'S COMPUTER MUCH LESS HAD IT IN THE BOOT OF MY CAR! Mystery.

                            Bro 1 tells me today that the computer has miraculously reappeared. Mystery I told bro 1 what bro 2 said above, and he said, I never saw it in his boot, I saw it in the back of his car (so misunderstanding on my part) Who do I believe about anything.... dont know! Bro 2's statement is very reminiscent of Bill Clinton's "i did not have sexual relations with that woman!" You gotta laugh eh!

                            I have managed to get $2000 of refunds for overpaid telecom and insurance bills sorted for my mum. And today I have changed her bank account and cut off the credit card - just to be sure that someone doesnt inadvertently? book something up that they have no intention of repaying! She still has her normal account where her pension goes into and I have done her a proper budget. I am waiting on lawyers to send me information about loan that my brother (2) has. Had long conversation with friends, one of whom is a lawyer, last night and they think mum's lawyer could well have been negligent based on what I've shown them. We'll see, I'm suspending some of my judgement until I see the paperwork that was produced as part of that loan arrangement.

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                            • Whew, what a day. I don't envy your situation, but sounds like you have some good supports to help you get it all sorted.
                              My musings

                              The old stuff

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                              • I was very very tired last night and fell asleep incredibly quickly before 9.30. I think just the stress of the last few days catching up. slept well.

                                The fireman took me out for a cheap and cheerful dinner last night. I didnt want fish, which was what he was going to cook, I thought I wanted a curry, but we ended up going to a local pub and sharing a burger. It was really good. This week is not very primal - although to be fair, I didnt eat much of the bun that the burger was on. However yesterday afternoon I indulged in a pack of potato chips and then some lollies. Yeah I'm just blaming stress buildup, not a great excuse I know. But hopefully I'll be a bit better today.

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