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Primal Journal: NZ Suse

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  • thanks GS. Yeah well I tried... but a colleague just offered me a square of her cadbury caramello chocolate and I caved. Just the one piece. So thats pretty good. Maybe I should keep an emergency dark chocolate bar at work for these sorts of days...

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    • hmmm well yesterday.... yes, where to begin.

      B: All good here, bacon and fried egg
      L: All good here too, huge chicken and avocado and cashew salad
      Small blip on the radar with the after lunch square of chocolate, certainly not major.
      D: All good here too, Bacon wrapped chilli chicken breast, capsicum stuffed with pesto, tomato, chorizo and feta and a big pile of brocoli on the side. The problem was after dinner. Our dinner guest brought these little chocolate mint biscuit things. I love chocomint biscuits, and these were like little mini ones. I went CRAZY. No seriously, I was out of control, I just couldnt stop eating them. I swear I growled when my partner moved the bowl of them away from me. It goes without saying then I felt sick, absolutely gross, my stomach was bloated and I just felt awful. I've never really been in this situation of binge eating, or at least nothing I can remember. And believe me this was a binge. I was, and still am, quite shocked with myself. Even this morning my stomach feels awful. bad bad sue. I will remember this though. I think it could partly have been due to a hormonal surge?? I had terrible low pains in my ovaries come on (those stupid pains I get without actually having a period) which I had to take a couple of nurofen for when I got home from work. So who knows, hormones or just me being a greedy guts when faced with chocolate biscuits.

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      • I dont know... sometimes I am good, and then I am bad. I know that I am waaaaaaaaaaay better with my nutrition than I ever used to be so that's good but honestly, the sugar monster is constantly coming for me!!

        yesterday
        B: Fried egg, then came to work and had a protein shake with coconut cream
        L: Went to get a blood test at lunchtime and decided I would stop at burger king on the way back for some chicken tenders and fries. I said no to the drink that came with it (so thats something) and I downed a couple of fish oils with my lunch to counter the PUFAs.
        Then I had some lollies. Not a lot, but enough... yeah so I say no to sugary coke in one hand and yes to sugar in a different form in the other. So annoying. I actually had a headache come on after that, and I felt rather jittery and anxious as well. Hmmm
        S: Bookclub night and we actually had it at a bookstore. The owner put on wine and nibbles so I had a few crackers with cheese and a couple of chocolates... and of course wine!
        D: Late dinner at a nearby thai restaurant... I passed on the rice but had a bit of chicken larb, penang curry and beef with ginger and veges. Very nice. Will go back to that restaurant for sure.

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        • I need to post this ramble in case i forget... I decided to have paella for lunch today (rice, chicken, chorizo) Wow, I am completely zoned out now. Tired and I mean TIRED. Ready for a nap. And just to make matters worse, I actually had a piece of wholegrain toast with my bacon and eggs this morning which is no doubt contributing to my lethargy. On the good news front, I dont feel like having lollies right now. Yay for small mercies!

          I have to think there is some hormonal stuff going on... this rabid eating and wanting crap food (bread, rice, lollies) seems to be occuring on a monthly basis if I look back over my journal. Now I just need to figure out a way to prevent it, cause will power is completely out the window it seems during these times.

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          • I still get the carby cravings on a monthly basis too. Haven't really sorted out a solution, but playing around with long IFs and lots of meat & fat. I do find that on a good fasting day, because I've already made up my mind not to eat, that it's easy to resist most things.
            My musings

            The old stuff

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            • I totally agree with Greensprout! More fat keeps you filled when you do eat and fasting just gives you another excuse not to junk. And yes; it seems almost all women have this problem are that time. So it's not just you!
              Starting Weight/BMI: 184/29.7
              Current Weight/BMI: 130 /21.0
              Ultimate Goal: 125/18

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              • well thank goodness I'm not alone! I hate these carb bingy days. They actually bring me down, when in fact I am actually a very happy person. So yesterday was a bit of a nightmare, it didnt exactly improve in the evening. I did take half a magnesium tab last night and I did sleep well so that is something. I feel a bit more in control today. What I need is a strategy to stop before I get these monthly binge feelings. Perhaps I'm deficient in something at the time. hmmm more research needed.

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                • Let us know what you find in your research... I hope everything works out for you.
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                  • If you figure out the secret key, let me know. I'm awful at the carb-y binges (or anything else, really...) during that time.

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                    • Hey Suse- I heard there was a rather large earthquake in NZ ......Hope everything is okay with you! Thinking and praying for everyone

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                      • Good grief Suse, hope you and your family are all okay.

                        Will be thinking about you...
                        My musings

                        The old stuff

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                        • thank you all for thinking of me, that is actually so kind it brings a wee tear to my eye. all good here, the earthquake was in Christchurch, the south island's largest city. my sister and her family live there and all are well. I had a phone call from a close friend (auckland based where I live) who happened to be overnighting in christchurch on the 13th floor of a hotel and said it was the scariest moment they've ever had and seriously wondered if they might die... these two are sensible people, not prone to exaggeration in any shape or form. I think swaying around and listening to creaking, groaning and buildings actually coming apart is scary.... anyway all is good. although big news here, probably bigger if not for the earthquake is a small plane going down and killing 9 people... in NZ this is a large scale air disaster.

                          on to a more everyday front, I have to report that I am off the wagon... bruised and battered and wondering how to get back on.... tomorrow is another day however.

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                          • ah well here I am again, trying to get back on the wagon and stay on it!.

                            Yesterdays food consumption
                            B omelette with cheese ham and tomato
                            L Leftover sausage casserole
                            D angus beef burger pattie served on bed of baby spinach, with bacon and mozarella cheese and portobello mushroom, avocado and red pepper. Delish
                            Some cheese and rice crackers and dessert wine after dinner.
                            A lot of wine drunk before dinner. sigh. I had such good intentions to not be boozing, but we went to visit my friends who had been in Christchurch for the earthquake so we could hear their "i survived" story Had a few glasses of wine at their place. Trouble with me drinking anywhere other than at home is that I have no concept of just how much I have had. They have these really large glasses and even though they dont fill them, there is probably way more in a standard pour at their place than at mine. So I lose track and, frankly, all common sense Even M feels like he drank too much this morning! Mind you it was fathers day in NZ yesterday so he can use that excuse. anyway, both have agreed, no alcohol today! Time to rest our livers.

                            Yesterday had a big walk in the morning down to a local cafe for our breakfast. Then came home and got stuck into some gardening (a few aching muscles today, lots of squatting, I can become very anal retentive when it comes to weeds!)

                            Afternoon I was struck down by terrible pains in my lower left side... period pains, ovulation. who knows. had to take painkillers and get the hottie out. No actual period though. sometimes I wonder if I should just get my Mirena taken out.

                            So the earthquake was pretty severe. There is just so much damage down there. It is a good thing it happened at 4am and not 4pm otherwise I feel there would definitely have been some deaths what with the flying rubble and glass. The insurance industry is going to be busy, actually a lot of industries will be busy. Possibly a good thing in a recession. Mind you, times seem tough in general in NZ with yet another finance company going to the wall. I suppose I should be grateful that all my money is tied up in a mortgage/house rather than actually having savings that have gone down the tubes. I think there will be some very interesting times ahead.
                            Last edited by Suse; 09-05-2010, 02:22 PM. Reason: wanted to add detail about gardening and pains

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                            • ooohhh aaahhh, still feeling the effects of some gardening... I've really got to start getting into primal fitness soon so that a day (actually about 2 hrs) of gardening doesnt kill me.

                              Anyway I had a really good day yesterday!
                              B: Scrambled egg and bacon - (tangent here... my partner sometimes brings me into work so we come in early and go to a cafe for a cheap and cheerful breakfast, ie bacon and eggs that we share. The cafe we've been going to for the last 2 years has changed hands and it isnt as good or as big a breakfast anymore so we thought we'd shop around. so this was a new cafe yesterday... it may have the potential to become our new "regular" haunt )
                              L: chicken and bacon salad with cashews
                              S: ok I did very well when I was offered some lollies after lunch, i said a very firm NO! However a little bit later someone put out some samples of some very nice baking (corporate gift sort of stuff) - all gluten free - so I had a tiny square of rocky road and a tiny piece of sultana cake and a tiny little gingerbread man. In the big scheme of things, I think I was very good.
                              D: Thai green curry with green beans, kumara and red pepper... on cauliflower rice. Absolutely yum. NO WINE! Yes I know, hard to believe!! Its quite nice having a night off the booze.
                              Lights out 9.30 and slept pretty well. Still had my usual middle of the night wakeup though. Bit of stomach/ovary?? pain still. Annoying but not as bad. Not sure what it is, perhaps I just need to go to the toilet!!??? :~ Took a probiotic last night before bed as I read somewhere on the forums yesterday about healing the gut while sleeping or something like that.... gettting all those good bacteria to work while I'm asleep sounds like a plan!!

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                              • Suse- I'm glad to hear your okay, but still a very humbling experience, Im sure! We get lost in our day to day lives, obsessing and fretting over this and that , and then BAM. Mother nature throws a curveball and reminds you at any given moment the earth can be split open, shook and turned upsideown.
                                All world rocking experiences deserve wine in my book, even if you just hearing the accounts of them. hehehe
                                Ive been going all out with the good bacteria and I've noticed too, that sometimes I get crampy bathroom like feelings. Nice to know your body is busy at work while your not

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