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Primal Journal: NZ Suse

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  • Weight this morning, exactly the same as yesterday, perhaps the scales are stuck all good, I'm clearly maintaining, and if I were to stop eating lollies/chocolate/drinking wine, I'd probably drop a bit. I've kind of set myself a goal to get bf down to 21 by end of month, but i just dont see it happening somehow.

    B scrambled eggs and bacon
    L pumpkin and coconut soup and some beef nachos
    S chocolate bar after lunch. In my defense (what defense sue, this is not a defense really it is just a BIG excuse) I was doing a lot of computer work and trying to figure out some problems in excel
    S pre dinner snacks of rice crackers, camenbert and hummus
    D Shepherds pie - boyfriend made it and left in oven for me when he went to work - I was lazy and didnt even cook any vegies to have with it. 2 glasses of sauvignon.

    You know how several days back I said I was going to do some serious ab exercises. well, nope. hasnt happened. what the hell is wrong with me! I am just so lazy. I dont have these huge bursts of energy that other people talk about. Perhaps it is because I havent ditched sugar. I find it hard to give up to be truthful. I know I'm not really primal, but I'd like to be a bit more than what I am. Motivation is such a tricky thing....


    • You might just find that once your shoulder heals and allows you to get back to workouts that it will help your motivation.

      Hang in there
      My musings

      The old stuff


      • ok time for a bit of a ramble. I woke up this morning and thought god, I need to get my shit together. I'm eating chocolate and lollies (sweets/candy/whatever you like to call it) after lunch all the time ( a bad habit I was in before I started primal) and I'm also drinking everyday and not exercising. Something just has to change. so I've made up my mind, 1 week no alcohol, not no wine, I mean NO alcohol, so no vodkas, no cosmopolitans, no beers, no wine (unless i use wine in my cooking of course - that doesnt count) I'm also going cold turkey on lollies as of today. I dont bloody need them, I just need to find the willpower to say no. I've got nuts here i can eat if I feel I really want something. I was reading the thread on the worlds fattest man and all the posts about sugar addiction etc. I dont know about sugar addiction, but I do think willpower comes into it somewhere - lately my willpower is missing in action, or should i say missing in inaction! Clearly exercise of any great shake isnt about to happen, between the shoulder (and yesterday I noticed twinges in the other arm and though jeez, give me a break) and the calf muscle I'm not really in good shape for primal fitness (ie, heavy lifting and sprinting) But I can work on reducing inflammation by eating better foods, giving my liver a break, etc.

        Food yesterday
        B: Bacon and egg (see how good I do with breakfast, i never step out of line here, so I cant say I have a sugar addiction can I)
        L: Leftover shepherds pie. (see that was good too)
        S: after lunch, just decided I wanted sweet stuff. Not that i was hungry, I just wanted sweet stuff. Got a chocolate toffee bar thing and I got a soda drink - I probably chose a slightly better soda option, it literally was soda water with lime, so lower in sugar than say a coke, but nonetheless, what the hell was I thinking.
        S: predinner snacks, corn chips, hummus, pesto, 2 cosmopolitans
        D: Actually a yummy dinner, steak with a lovely redwine reduction, capsicums stuffed with pesto, tomatoes, chorizo, feta. A couple of small squares of potato and kumara. 1/4 glass of redwine as that was all that was left in the bottle and we didnt want to open another.

        So you look at that, and really the only thing that is wrong with the food picture above is the sugar content. The small amount of carbs in say the potato/kumara are just not worth worrying about. But the cosmopolitans, the lollies, the soda.... hmmm you see my problem dont you.

        And to add insult to injury on the scales this morning I was 54.2kg and 22.3 bf - so in one day I put on 300g and 0.4%bf. Sugar sugar sugar sugar sugar is the ENEMY.

        Its time for a change.


        • I had a good day yesterday. I just had to push through the desire for sugar though.
          B: Omelette with leftovers from dinner night before, so had a bit of steak, bit of feta, bit of capsicum, kumara etc
          L: big chicken salad with avocado
          D: Thai green curry, no rice

          Pushed through after lunch with no lollies. Went to the movies to see Inception after work (a work event and they supplied lollies) and I didnt eat any of the lollies, in fact I gave my bag away. But man, I really wanted some. Drank my water instead. Drank a lot of water yesterday. and of course, no alcohol last night either!

          On the scales this morning I was 53.5 and 21.7bf. Thats a whopping great diff from yesterday. dont quite understand how that works as I weigh on my home scales same time, empty bladder each morning. But nonetheless, am happy with that. Maybe the diff is I had a bowel movement yesterday, first time since i had that tummy upset on Saturday night. Sorry, you probably didnt need to know that


          • friday very good
            B cant recall, but probably bacon and eggs seeing as that is my go to
            L smoked tomato soup NO bread (good girl)
            D fish and chips from the local takeaway. not ideal but then again it could be worse so i feel thats a win.
            No booze, none. yes, good arent I

            saturday - not quite as good
            B Bacon and eggs
            L rotisserie chicken, spinach and dang, bread, even more dang, white bread and insult to injury a half cream bun (also white doughy crap). friends bought the bad stuff with them. I felt incredibly sleepy after lunch which I am sure was as a result of the bread
            D out to my partners aunt for dinner and she went to a big effort. she did some lovely little starters (well lovely if you like salmon or tuna which i dont but they looked pretty) then we had a tahitian soup (coconut and fish), then a chicken, grape and mushroom casserole on rice (yes I had some rice, I think it would have been rude not to) and then dessert of meringues with cream and berries. Now i dont eat fruit (have I ever mentioned this before) but I did actually make myself have some raspberries and they were ok, so I feel I might just start trying the odd berry here and there in the future. I also relented and had one glass of wine - with my dinner only - I drank water before and after dinner

            dreadful night sleep, partner snored all night so I'll be needing a nap later i'd say.

            took the dogs for a walk in the rain yesterday so feel that was virtuous. Today I'll try and get in another walk between showers but am going to hunt out my pilates dvd and do that maybe (although pilates is pretty boring but it is a good ab workout)

            aiming for a good day on teh food front, and will be alcohol free until thursday as originally planned.


            • so much for hunting out my pilates DVD. Did nothing, well apart from a pile of washing and housework and clipping the dogs. But then I was tired so decided to lounge on the sofa with a good book (currently reading Vanishing Acts by Jodi Piccoult).

              B: Bacon and fried egg
              L: a small piece of chicken
              S: Hummus on rice crackers with camenbert
              D: Sirloin Roast with a chermoula marinade, roasted cauli and brocoli and my carrot/celery/leek julienne. No wine. Lots of water.

              I am tired today, I've been sleeping all night with my partner for the last week (apart from his 2 night shifts) and its slightly killing me I think. Its lovely to be able to sleep with him but his snoring keeps me awake, its got a bit better recently (some throat spray he has been using) but I'm so sensitive to noise. I've even got my own custom fitted earplugs. Anyway I've got 3 nights break now as he is on night shift so I can get back in the groove. Regardless of whether I sleep with him or not, I always still wake up intermittently throughout the night. Sleep is one of the primal laws that hasnt really been happening the best for me.


              • I think I might be so overtired that now I cant sleep! Bloody hell. Mind you I've been head down trying to work out an excel formula all night so I'm kind of a little bit wired. Have finished my book, thought that might make me sleepy but no. Oh well, sleep will come eventually no doubt

                B: protein shake with coconut cream and water
                S: almond and chocolate friand
                L: beef lasagne (went out for lunch with a friend and just decided this was the best of the worst options) Having said that, I note that I had absolutely no sugar cravings after lunch
                D: thai green chicken curry on cauli rice. No wine again, sticking to my plan like a good girl.


                • exhausted this morning. Didnt get to sleep until after midnight and then woke up at 1.30 for a toilet break and then woke up at 6.30 (before my alarm) grrr.

                  In a shocking mood, terrible road rage on teh way to work this morning, I just dont think I can be bothered with people getting in my way or on my nerves today


                  • Fell off the wagon yesterday
                    B omelette with bacon cheese and mushrooms
                    L Meatlovers pizza! (and i really enjoyed it)
                    S chocolate almond friand
                    S 4 rice crackers with hummus and camenbert
                    D thai green curry with cauli rice. 1/2 bottle of chardonnay. Yes I broke my wine fast. I knew a wine or 2 would put me out like a light and sure enough it certainly did, I really had a good nights sleep last night (if you discount the times I rolled on to my side and made my shoulder ache)

                    My day got better yesterday as I was able to figure out an excel formula that had been bugging me for the last couple of days. I love excel, I am a supernerd when it comes to this stuff, I just enjoy manipulating the data. Freak.


                    • Reasonable day food wise yesterday but I hit the booze last night... had a friend over for dinner and she wanted me to make cocktails - well I could hardly refuse, cause after all I do make a damn fine cosmopolitan!! Then followed up with some chardonnay. So feeling slightly worse for wear this morning.

                      Went to specialist this morning re the shoulder and he tells me I have adhesive capsulitis (aka frozen shoulder). Another cortisone injection but to a different spot, (oh my god, seriously painful, i was seeing stars with that I can tell you). A little bit alarmed to read that people with heart disease, lung disease, diabetes etc at more risk of getting frozen shoulder... god what if I have heart disease and dont know it. Ok I'm not really worried about it, but it certainly makes you think.... anyway, he seems to think that it will be a lot better within 3-4 months, I just need to get on with more specific physio and home exercises (but have to wait a week before I do anything at all with it)

                      So when my shoulder is better I will have no excuses to not do some heavy lifting!!


                      • Hope your shoulder feels better soon!

                        Signature Approved by Mark Sisson


                        • Ouch on the shoulder. Hopefully the cortisone will give you some relief. Good to hear it should heal. In the meantime, you can always walk, do squats, etc.

                          As for last's done, so just go on from here. God knows, it happens to the best of us!
                          My musings

                          The old stuff


                          • thanks tawfunguy and Greensprout. Lots of post injection flare today, and feel super super tired. Have had a bad day eating today as well with the excuse of I'm in pain and I'll have what I bloody well want I'll try and get back to being good tomorrow. at the moment everything aches and I just feel a bit out of sorts.

                            Yes squats. I'm going to get into them. I really must, I've got to stop with all this not exercising palavar. Trouble is when I have no motivation, I just dont have it.... and then when I get it I'm enthused to the hilt and there's no stopping me. I guess it'll come back again... sometimes it is reading the right thing at the right time??? Spoke to my team training trainer today, wanted her to know that I do really want to get back to boot camp but its just not on the possible list for a bit. She's given me a recommendation of a sort of holistic chiropracter she thinks might be able to help me so I'm going to give him a go!


                            • At times we get derailed and get off track.... but that is ok.... it happens and it happens to everyone. True, for some it is easier than for others. Remember, when you are down, less motivated or such, reach out to those around you especially here on the forums..... there are plenty of us you can lean on to help re-motivate you. Remember also to pace yourself don't kill yourself. If you need to make minor adjustments in order to feel better, then do so as no one knows your body better than you do.

                              So come on..... pick yourself back up..... find those tracks and get back on....... you will do just fine!

                              Signature Approved by Mark Sisson


                              • thanks T. Yes getting back on track is a priority but I'm not going to get to messed up about going off it from time to time. This is life, it doesnt follow a script.

                                This morning I feel so much better, no constant pain like yesterday and I had a really good nights sleep (aided by the 3 cosmopolitans and 2 ibuprofens I took before bed to help with the pain) I got out of bed this morning and did 10 squats. 10 piddly squats, but hey, at least I did some - it's a start!

                                anyway, i'm not going to log my food yesterday, suffice to say it wasnt good, but I'm planning a good day today. I've got a strategy in my head for the after lunch sugar craving so here's hoping.

                                My weight on the scales this morning was 54.1kg and 22.1 bf. Its not bad, but its not where I want to be. My goal for august was go get the bf down to 21 and its not going to happen because I've been such a slackarse.

                                Weekend coming up. Going to get some big dog walks in.