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Georgette Redux: A new primal journal

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  • Pebbles- I'm taking 500mg (I may bump that to twice daily here soon) and the form I have is "flush free." It seems to do as it claims.
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Latest Journal

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    • Mine is flush free as well. Not sure what that means but I take it.
      Georgette

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      • I've noticed that when I take the no flush Niacin, my checks get really red and blotchy and I really want to eat some meat. I keep wondering if this is normal?

        I really need to get Caitlyn interested in eating better. I think she's up to 190 in weight. I have no clue as to what to say to her about this and last night when I was watching her, I could feel all the hateful things my mom said start to me come up my throat and I stopped it in the nick of time before they actually came out. I had to go inside and throw up I was literally so sick with myself over this. I really wish I could think of the right thing to say so not to hurt her feelings but I also know I may need to be harsh with her as well. I'm actually scared I could lose her because of her weight.
        Georgette

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        • That cheek thing I think is actually the flushing (blushing) niacin can cause.
          Maybe she'd be a bit more receptive if it came from her pediatrician? Or maybe attack it from the angle of being healthy so she can not have to worry as much about it as an adult, and leave weight out of it, at least for the time being?
          Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
          My Latest Journal

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          • Originally posted by naiadknight View Post
            That cheek thing I think is actually the flushing (blushing) niacin can cause.
            That, and something akin to hot flashes.
            Most people don't realize how much energy it takes for me to pretend to be normal.

            If I wanted to listen to an asshole, I'd fart.

            Twibble's Twibbly Wibbly

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            • Originally posted by naiadknight View Post
              That cheek thing I think is actually the flushing (blushing) niacin can cause.
              Maybe she'd be a bit more receptive if it came from her pediatrician? Or maybe attack it from the angle of being healthy so she can not have to worry as much about it as an adult, and leave weight out of it, at least for the time being?
              I'm without insurance right now so the pediatrician is out. I was thinking of having one of my sisters talk to her but turned that idea down flat almost immediately. Especially when the one said Tristan is fat at 5'3 and roughly 120 pounds, no thank you. Yeah, she has a small gut but not enough to be considered "fat". Part of me wants to tell Caitlyn to eat whatever the hell she wants and the other part of me wants to do something about it. I need to find a happy medium somewhere.
              Georgette

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              • Get talking with her and ask her what she thinks of her body, under the context of self image or something. She may already be aware she's overweight, but not know what to do about it.
                Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
                My Latest Journal

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                • I know she doesn't like her body, she has told me that before. I just never know what to do or say to get her motivated. The person who still hates her body is the one that is expected to fix this. I want there to be hope for her, I know there isn't any for me at this point.
                  Georgette

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                  • A friend of mine posted this on facebook and I am stealing this. I think this is appropriate for not only myself, but for everyone. Everyone goes through life with trials and tribulations... Some worse than others. Don't focus on WHAT happens so much, where u feel sorry for yourself or let this get you down. Focus on being strong, a fighter & survivor. Keep moving forward on your life journey. Be an inspiration to others needing your strength to help them realize that this is life... No one said it would be easy.
                    Georgette

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                    • Maybe you could bring the topic up with Caitlyn as a request to help you - like you need a workout buddy and healthy eating buddy. I would try something like "since I know you aren't happy with you body either, I thought that maybe we could do this together". Ask her for her ideas and incorporate as many as possible so she feels like it's her plan too. Also be sure to add that as her Mom, you only can see her beauty, but since she'd mentioned it and you feel that way too, maybe you can help each other.

                      I would not go to a doctor as I would feel shamed as a kid and not empowered at all AND they might want to try some crappy idea like "take a pill".

                      Wishing you much luck!

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                      • When I took her to the doctor for a nasty cold earlier in the year, her doctor freaked out over her weight and immediately scheduled a cholesterol screen. Her numbers were well within normal ranges. The doctor would more than likely force a vegan diet down our throats and I would quit him if he did.
                        Georgette

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                        • Found out earlier today, the job won't be starting until next Monday now. Apparently, what had happened was that a couple of the other people being hired by other agencies didn't get their background check info in on time so that delayed the class. Oh well, at least I know I have a job to go to next week.

                          I've been doing a lot of cleaning and rearranging of things and I worked on my closet. I realized I don't have a lot of variety in my wardrobe color wise. I have lots of blues ranging in shades from baby blues to teals and black and white. That's it. One or 2 pieces in green, pink, red, purple and grey and brown. It's funny, whenever I am out shopping, I always gravitate to the blues, black and white(white is really more of an accent with the black) and I try to force to buy clothes in other colors, it just never works that way.

                          Had a not so good day food wise. Binged a bit. Ate a pint of ice cream at breakfast along with eggs and bacon and then at dinner had 2 helpings of taco salad. I hate that I did this but my head has just been in that bad place that it gets to when time gets idle for me. I did manage to take a walk with Caitlyn today. It sort of helped.
                          Georgette

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                          • Geo-
                            If you watch my blog, you'll notice I rotate pretty consistently between black, grey, and blue, with the occasional splash of green or purple. You'll also notice that the only brown I ever wear is on my shoes or maybe a leopard print scarf. Don't buy it if you won't wear it. I used to own brown and colorful clothes in an attempt to make myself wear them. Didn't work. I'd push past them trying to find another blue button up or black t-shirt. You've discovered what you like. If it really bugs you, get accessories in branch out colors.
                            I'm glad the talk with Caitlyn helped. It may've also helped get your brain out of dangerous territory.
                            Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
                            My Latest Journal

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by naiadknight View Post
                              Geo-
                              If you watch my blog, you'll notice I rotate pretty consistently between black, grey, and blue, with the occasional splash of green or purple. You'll also notice that the only brown I ever wear is on my shoes or maybe a leopard print scarf. Don't buy it if you won't wear it. I used to own brown and colorful clothes in an attempt to make myself wear them. Didn't work. I'd push past them trying to find another blue button up or black t-shirt. You've discovered what you like. If it really bugs you, get accessories in branch out colors.
                              I'm glad the talk with Caitlyn helped. It may've also helped get your brain out of dangerous territory.
                              I'm the same way. Used to buy all kinds of clothes and almost never wore them as I also prefer the purples, blues, greens and black. You remind me that I really need to clean some closets and throw some crap out. I still have boxes that have only been peeked in from our move over 8 years ago. Who am I kidding - I'm never gonna use that crap again and if I need it I'll likely never find it!

                              Have you come up with a plan yet to help Caitlyn eat better?

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                              • The one nice thing about having Caitlyn around is that she actually is pretty damn good at figuring out what clothes I would like and look good in. We did a little shopping last Friday and she picked out a really cute emerald green raglan sleeved tee that had silver stripes through it. Not something I would normally pick out for me but it looked good on me. I also got a fuschia peasant style blouse. Caitlyn is trying to get me to accessorize more with necklaces and scarves but I'm sort of leery to wear them. I have a thick neck and I think those items draws too much attention to my neck. I have one necklace that I wear almost religiously and then my earrings that I accessorize with.

                                @Mud Flinger, when it comes down to food with Caitlyn, I just need to keep the processed stuff out of the house and cook more. Most of her favorite foods are full of starch(she is definitely my kid) and I really need to limit it. I won't remove it all the way. I will allow for certain foods on special occassions but that will be it. I told her yesterday that if we can keep each other in check, it will be easier for the both of us to lose. Plus, for her, getting her out walking or doing something physical with her body is going to help a lot.
                                Georgette

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