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waiting for the whoosh - badgergirl's journal

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  • I *wish* I'd written that poem - it's Robert Pinsky.
    Glad the kickboxing is er...kickass. Perhaps I will take my own advice one day and take up an aggressive hobby.
    I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

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    • B: yoghurt, sultanas, coffee (have put the sultanas in front of the p'nut butter)
      L: beef stock veg soup
      D: chicken korma

      The year is on the turn...the days are getting noticeably lighter at either end and, as a direct result, I have slightly more go about me. A good feeling.

      Husband and I chatted at the w/e and committed to moving this year - it'll be another rental and possibly further out, both downsides for me. It is time. Having been raised by a NEW AGE (the caps are warranted) mother, I try to avoid Feng Shui-ing things or over reading significance into life events, but the fact remains that we have felt stuck ever since we moved here (four and a half years ago, now) and this house has never been a home.

      It'll take planning and saving. We want to look before we leap and we have only just signed a new lease on this place, but at least a decision has been made and plots can be hatched. I don't do well with these thought-out things - I'm much more impetuous than husband, but to get him to commit to moving in and of itself is a victory.
      I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

      Comment


      • Hey badger!

        Very, very good on the decision to move, lady. I know what you mean about being emotionally conflicted re moving because of your background with your mom, but personally, I am a HUGE believer in "Feng Shui Light", if you will. No, I don't think your Luck and Qi will flow down your shower drains if you forget to stop them up when not in use and all that nonsense, but the simple fact is that if you hate your own four walls and/or location and/or the place is okay but holds hugely negative memories for one, you gotta go - just because that is negative emotional weight nobody needs.

        The first house hubby and I had just after marriage almost cost us our marriage - I was thaaaaaat close to leaving. Sounds really shallow from me but OMG, I literally cried and sobbed in our first place, endlessly. Not in front of him - that transmuted to anger in his presence, but if my mom hadn't been there (on the phone, as she didn't live in NJ) constantly to pick me up and put me back together again, I would have walked. Hubby bought a house without any consultation from me at all - he proposed with a ring in one hand and a book of photos in another in my little apartment in Germany - truth. Being a child of poverty until I moved to Europe, I thought this was the coolest Thing - being able to move into a real, We Own It house, so I wasn't primed to hate it at all, quite the opposite. Then I got to see it...

        It was old, drafty, tiny, and located in a near-ghetto neighborhood (it was mixed-races, lest you think I mean black, but the malaise and poverty were the same). In the summer we fried, in the winter I watched the cold blow the curtains around, the carpeting was a health code disaster, the kitchen subfloor grew mushrooms, and it had frequent bouts of ant swarms. The slate roof had holes where you could see sky. Just starting out, we had no money for repairs save the ones like shrink-wrapping windows in plastic to stop our utility money from leaking out. The only thing I learned from that place is what I would never again tolerate in a house except in case of zombie apocalypse, and that I would need the strength of will to seriously oppose hubby at times - he is a steamroller when he gets something into his head.

        The second house we bought was 1000% better in all respects. We bought that one together. At that point, it just became a question of running out of room for our family of six, and whether we wanted to stay in NJ.

        So, badger, when the time is right financially, go and get a place that you would actually WANT to come home to.
        Last edited by Crabbcakes; 07-29-2013, 07:13 AM.
        I have a mantra that I have spouted for years... "If I eat right, I feel right. If I feel right, I exercise right. If I exercise right, I think right. If I think right, I eat right..." Phil-SC

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        • Thank you for the words of wisdom and support, Crabcakes. I am sure that our physical environment shapes our interactions and thoughts, too. Surely living in a pit makes one feel the pits. This place was a last resort, honestly, this TOWN was a last resort (and not an all-inclusive holiday resort, in case you were wondering). I loathe it. We are tethered by school and by poverty, but that doesn't mean we are tethered to this house.

          To that end, and because I have no idea where the moving funds that we've said we're going to save will come from, I'm battening down all the hatches and exercising my frugal muscles (again). If frugality was a bench press I think I'd be an Olympian by now.

          B: yoghurt, sultanas, coffee
          S: nuts and blue cheese (thanks, employer)
          L: leftover chicken korma
          D: apple, tuna, broc, sour cream, capers (the XYs had homemade fish and chips)
          I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

          Comment


          • Lived for 3 years in a maisonette in a right shithole as it was all I could afford at the time and hated almost every minute of being their!
            I'm a pretty easy going and positive bloke, but it did drag me down, couldn't really afford to move to my currant place when I did, and had work to live for the first few years, but it was worth every penny, so I do have a rough idea what you're going through!

            To that end, you flex they muscles girl....

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            • Originally posted by Dhansakdave View Post
              Lived for 3 years in a maisonette in a right shithole as it was all I could afford at the time and hated almost every minute of being their!
              I'm a pretty easy going and positive bloke, but it did drag me down, couldn't really afford to move to my currant place when I did, and had work to live for the first few years, but it was worth every penny, so I do have a rough idea what you're going through!

              To that end, you flex they muscles girl....
              sage advice that......

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              • Originally posted by ssn679doc View Post
                sage advice that......
                Yep. Self-sacrifice for the greater good here we come. Luckily, we have a freezer full of meat.

                B: yoghurt, sultanas (they are the new p'nut butter)
                L: nuts and cheese - thanks, employer
                D:beef stroganoff (frugal tip: gravy beef in the slow cooker is as good as filet steak in the pan), broc, butternut pumpkin; hump day wine allowance.
                I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

                Comment


                • B: yoghurt, coffee
                  L: nuts, cheese (the last day of free lunches)
                  D: chicken drumstick slow-cooked with tomatoes and chorzio (would have been other extra ingredients, but the joys of public transport had me commuting for an extra half hour); raspberries, yoghurt

                  I have lost a tiny - in the grams, I expect - amount of lard...which is nice.
                  I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

                  Comment


                  • Originally posted by badgergirl View Post
                    B: yoghurt, coffee
                    L: nuts, cheese (the last day of free lunches)
                    D: chicken drumstick slow-cooked with tomatoes and chorzio (would have been other extra ingredients, but the joys of public transport had me commuting for an extra half hour); raspberries, yoghurt

                    I have lost a tiny - in the grams, I expect - amount of lard...which is nice.
                    I presume you are refering to body lard.... losing that is is good thing.... Losing COOKING lard, on the other hand (in particular, bacon grease) is a severely punishable offense! Good job on the lak-o-lard!

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                    • Yeah, lak-o-lard is nice. Honestly, I'm never truly lardy and my lard threshold is very low... I wish I didn't prefer the hungry look, but I do. I'd do better to get fit, but the time, the energy and the motivation are all sadly lacking.
                      I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by badgergirl View Post
                        I'm never truly lardy and my lard threshold is very low...
                        god I wish I could say that...... if I were a weather forcast I'd be mostly grey and lardy with a slight chance of weight loss in the evening hours

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by ssn679doc View Post
                          god I wish I could say that...... if I were a weather forcast I'd be mostly grey and lardy with a slight chance of weight loss in the evening hours
                          Nonsense! You'd be a delightful warm and rosy evening, ideal for al fresco dining.
                          I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

                          Comment


                          • Originally posted by badgergirl View Post
                            Nonsense! You'd be a delightful warm and rosy evening, ideal for al fresco dining.
                            You make a fat old man blush talkin like that..... lol

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by badgergirl View Post
                              Nonsense! You'd be a delightful warm and rosy evening, ideal for al fresco dining.
                              Ahh, and what would you be?

                              Originally posted by ssn679doc View Post
                              You make a fat old man blush talkin like that..... lol
                              I get the feelin' that takes some doing....

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by Dhansakdave View Post
                                Ahh, and what would you be?



                                I get the feelin' that takes some doing....
                                Methinks she was speaking of herself.....

                                Most things don't makes me blush, though compliments such as the good lady's usually do. I'm such a girly-man in that regard..... lol but don't tell anyone OK?

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