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waiting for the whoosh - badgergirl's journal

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  • Originally posted by badgergirl View Post
    Sluts and pikeys will inherit the earth. I miss the Iggles.
    Eventually....Bit more navigatable as well, you could probably fit the Iggles in Yarra park....

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    • Wheee. We have a house guest tonight, an old friend of husband's who we haven't seen for about four years (she's had a tumultuous few years). So excited. She's one of my favourite people. We've kicked small boy out of his room and put him in our bed (I've got a mattress on the floor). I turned down a chance to see AFP play tonight. Husband cut his hair and shaved his stubble. We've cleaned the house from top to bottom. And I've cooked...and baked. Husband bought six bottles of wine.

      I even put my face on and styled the mop top. Dear lord! Food photos to follow.

      ETA. We had homemade hummus, baba ganoush and various tiny nibbles to begin, then steak and a few salads followed by orange chiffon cake.
      Last edited by badgergirl; 02-22-2014, 02:04 PM.
      I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

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      • good looking grub....

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        • Drooling...
          "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

          B*tch-lite

          Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

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          • Small boy came into the kitchen waving his hands in front of him, 'Mummy, for winter I need you to get me some muppets for my hands.'

            Squee.
            I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

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            • I miss not having grandchildren. But I don't miss not having had children. There lies the rub.
              "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

              B*tch-lite

              Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

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              • Originally posted by JoanieL View Post
                I miss not having grandchildren. But I don't miss not having had children. There lies the rub.
                Speaking as someone who has alienated one set of olds and is too far away from the other set, I'm sure you could find a family who would welcome an honorary granny.
                Last edited by badgergirl; 02-23-2014, 01:15 AM.
                I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

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                • Joanie, you're our kind of granny!
                  Life is death. We all take turns. It's sacred to eat during our turn and be eaten when our turn is over. RichMahogany.

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                  • Oh my BG does that food look delish!! And are those fresh FIGS I see?? I think I might just consider a nipple piercing for some fresh figs lol! All the produce in the grocery stores is so pathetic right now. Nary a fig in sight.

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                    • Figs, figs, figs, figs. Greek yoghurt. Peaches. Figs. Steak.

                      My food diary

                      Ugh. Sorry for the lurch into bleak, but, seriously, the cr*p we carry with us - is it possible to discard it forever? To totally mix metaphors, I feel as though I'm nursing a you-tube-worthy cyst. I've done the hard work and lanced that thing a thousand times, but it just keeps coming back. And each time it refills I just look at it and say - seriously, all this, again? Can't I be done with it now? I've tried every antiseptic, every preventative measure, I've exposed that skin to sunlight. No. Here we go again. It's so predictable and dull. Anyway, I'll try and make the aspiration as quick, clinical and thorough as possible. No sprays of projectile pus this time.

                      And. There's never a point of rest. There's no resolution or endpoint. There's just acceptance that the pendulum of narrative will keep swinging from one interpretation to another and the shame, the questions, the burden never gets lighter it just shifts from one position to another. The self interrogation doesn't let up, and the person answering keeps changing her story.
                      I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

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                      • Do you think sharing your thoughts with someone (professional) would help you work through some things? Or have you been down that road before?

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                        • Originally posted by Clarkie View Post
                          Do you think sharing your thoughts with someone (professional) would help you work through some things? Or have you been down that road before?
                          Twice. Once was good (in the UK - god bless the NHS) and once was awful (here, in Aus, paid for). Ah, and the years of 'co-counselling' my mother inflicted on me. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Co-counselling There was no 'co' about it though. F*cking cult, if you ask me, which of course no one did.
                          Last edited by badgergirl; 02-23-2014, 03:33 PM.
                          I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

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                          • Does writing it down help you to "get it out" a bit?? Seems like it's obviously something you are not done with if it keeps resurfacing. Can you ever "be done" with that kind of shit though? Or do you just learn how to live with it and not let it consume you? I wish I could help you in some way. If it helps just a tiny bit, I think you are a really cool lady and I'd love to share a bottle (or 6) of wine with you.

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                            • Originally posted by Clarkie View Post
                              Does writing it down help you to "get it out" a bit?? Seems like it's obviously something you are not done with if it keeps resurfacing. Can you ever "be done" with that kind of shit though? Or do you just learn how to live with it and not let it consume you? I wish I could help you in some way. If it helps just a tiny bit, I think you are a really cool lady and I'd love to share a bottle (or 6) of wine with you.
                              Yes, it does. The bottle or six is where things went wrong. There was an opening to discuss sibling sexual abuse and I took it, which wasn't really fair on husband as I'd never told him about it before... For long, boring reasons to do with not having any kind of stable opinion on what happened, who's at 'fault', long-term effects; not wanting that to be on his mind when he's around my family... I don't know. There are so many bigger, worse things that privileging that one short-lived episode just seems to not be worthwhile. And yet.

                              Separately, I'm exploring some stuff about power dynamics and sexual agency.

                              And because it's me and I can't just enjoy something I have to think about it. A lot. Things are getting rather twisted up.
                              I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

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                              • Writing helped me get through some my emotional "cysts" (great metaphor BTW). I'll be honest, it took years, though I was not writing about it actively the whole time. My MDA journal has been very therapeutic in that way

                                Sent from my ADR6350 using Tapatalk 2
                                Depression Lies

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