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Skinny girl to fat girl and back to skinny girl - for life

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  • Skinny girl to fat girl and back to skinny girl - for life

    At least that's how I hope it will go.

    All my early life I was the skinny girl. That was my body image. Tall, thin, busty. I could eat anything, never exercise and still stay skinny. Eventually I started going to the gym for strength training and did that hard core for 10 years. Met my husband there and everything was grand.

    Except that since then I've done nothing except gain weight. To combat it I tried starving myself which only made me hungry and crabby. I tried exercising like a crazy person which only made me tired, hungrier and crabby. My weight steadily increased. I had to buy new clothes.

    Then I did the worst thing possible. I gave up. I said fuck it and tried to ignore what my body was doing.

    But I stayed active. I hike. I walk...never could be a runner. The weight stayed on. Well that's the way my body likes it, right? Must be ok. My cholesterol is fine and always has been. I don't have HBP or diabetes or any other issues. My weight plateaued off at about 180. It's been there for a few years now. Each time it crept up it was scary, but I couldn't see a way out of it. Conventional diets and programs did not tempt me. I was still the skinny girl in my head, but that changed. Now I had to face reality. I am the fat girl.

    But that made things worse. It didn't motivate me, it depressed me. When I was diagnosed with cancer in 2010 I thought that having chemo might actually help me lose. When my oncologist said that chemo and radiation probably wouldn't be necessary, I was actually bummed. How's that one? Crazy.

    My husband all the while said nothing. He's a fitness nut. WAY more discipline than I have by far. He's always been a body builder (non juice-monkey variety) and about 5 years ago he started running again. He stopped eating yogurt and dropped 20 pounds once. I hate him. In a good way. Lately he's been shifting to kettle bell workouts and more core, whole body movements rather than traditional gym stuff. He taught me the Turkish get up. All this led to his finding the Primal diet and after about a 10 minute convo, we decided to do it.

    That was 3 days go. On our weekend grocery run we did not buy one item with grains in it. Imagine, leaving Sam's Club without a case of beer!!! Oh the humanity!

    So anyway...we've never been much into processed foods and I haven't drunk soda since I was about 20 (I'm 44) and so breaking a lot of bad habits isn't the problem. Frankly I don't know if we will have any problems on this new food program, but it's good to see a community of folks who get it and can support me if I get crabby.

    Phew. That's a crapload of info, ain't it??
    5' 9" 47 YO F
    PB start June 2, 2012
    Pre PB SW = 180 (no scale at home, Mom's scale January - 153lbs!)
    Current deadlift 245 lbs, squat 165 lbs, bench press 135 lbs


    PB Journal

  • #2
    You are on the right track!! Cant wait to hear how your first two weeks go!

    Comment


    • #3
      Thanks so much. It's going to be interesting I'm sure.

      So far today -

      Sleep, not much. probably 4 hours give or take.

      Coffee - light cream, splenda

      B -1 duck egg scramble w/mushrooms, cheddar, ham and tomatoes.
      2 tbsp plain greek yogurt over 1c fruit (pineapple, strawberry, cherry and blueberry)

      L - salad of spinach, HBE, yellow pepper, cucumber and tomato w/olive oil & balsamic
      chicken breast & green beans, handful of cherries for dessert

      5 minutes Turkish get-ups w/10lb dumbbell.
      Last edited by June68; 06-04-2012, 10:09 AM.
      5' 9" 47 YO F
      PB start June 2, 2012
      Pre PB SW = 180 (no scale at home, Mom's scale January - 153lbs!)
      Current deadlift 245 lbs, squat 165 lbs, bench press 135 lbs


      PB Journal

      Comment


      • #4
        So here's an interesting thing, I woke up this morning and I'm not hungry. Judging by the things people have been saying in these threads it's not uncommon, but it surprised me. Usually I wake up feeling hollow. So now I'm enjoying my coffee (cue Walter's voice and updating this with a cat on my chair, too).

        Yesterday I realized I probably don't have enough fat in my diet. It's so against the grain of what I've been doing and how I've been eating that it's hilarious. Like for example husband and I were talking yesterday and then suddenly I said, wait, we can have sausage! We have sausage maybe twice a year when we go on vacation and that's it. Same with bacon although it was formerly a Christmas treat as well. Now what will we have on Christmas, pancakes?

        So the rest of the day wrapped up like this, because I didn't have a high fat breakfast or lunch I was hungry a lot and so had 4 slices of genoa salami, a few pistachios at one point and then around 5pm cut up the rest of the yellow pepper and had 2 slices of cheddar with my chardonnay. It took the edge off and hubby made a primal dinner of local hamburger (cooked like a steak and just as bloody) with sauteed mushrooms, onions and bacon, mixed veggies and 1/2 bot of a Monterey cty petite sirah.

        Slept very well although Larry did wake me up by biting me (don't you love cats?). Hope the rain holds off long enough for a walk. I have been a walker for years and usually do anywhere between 5 and 8 miles in one go so it can take a while.

        Anyway, good morning peeps. If anyone reads this.
        5' 9" 47 YO F
        PB start June 2, 2012
        Pre PB SW = 180 (no scale at home, Mom's scale January - 153lbs!)
        Current deadlift 245 lbs, squat 165 lbs, bench press 135 lbs


        PB Journal

        Comment


        • #5
          Good luck June.. I switched from Splenda (after reading such horror about it) to Stevia. I buy Sweetleaf and really like it, especially in green tea with lime. It's neat that both of you are involved, I can't get my DH off bread and cereal and Pepsi.

          Comment


          • #6
            Funny you should bring up, stevia. Hubby and I have been trying to figure out how to make mint juleps without sugar and decided we could crush a stevia leaf in with the mint.
            5' 9" 47 YO F
            PB start June 2, 2012
            Pre PB SW = 180 (no scale at home, Mom's scale January - 153lbs!)
            Current deadlift 245 lbs, squat 165 lbs, bench press 135 lbs


            PB Journal

            Comment


            • #7
              So this is funny. I'm not a cook. I've never been a cook. I don't like to cook. When I met my husband the 2nd question I asked him was 'do you cook?', followed up by 'do you like to?'. For the past 17 years all I've done is make canned soup, boil eggs, boil pasta and make toast. I can make a mean risotto strangely enough as well, but that's it. Meat mystifies me, both to purchase and to cook although I eat it happily enough.

              But having to make my own cooked breakfast with eggs and stuff is pretty new and hilariously funny because I NEVER COOK. That said, I actually find I don't hate it. Maybe it's the novelty of the thing, I don't know.

              And I found that without a scale in the house, tracking progress will be a bit non-traditional. I took my (grossly fat) measurements and put on a pair of pants (size 12) that I can barely squeeze into, and those will be my guide. Now I'm going to try not to obsess over them and measure every day and force myself to only once a week.

              We have a family wedding coming up in August and it's casual so I have a great dress already in the closet. Problem is it hasn't fit me in years. It's a size 10 and completely adorable so that's also going to be my goal. To lose enough weight not to look like a cow in it. That's probably 10 to 20 pounds and hopefully it comes off my waist, hips and thighs so it will fit.

              Anyway...I'm off to walk a few miles. I think it's stopped pouring.


              ETA

              B = coffee, 2 duck egg scramble w/2 slices bacon, 1 ham round slice, red pepper & spinach, 1 greek style strawberry yogurt.
              L = chicken breast, spinach salad w/HBE, celery, tomatoes, red pepper, cukes & fresh mozzarella. EVOO & rw vin dressing.
              Last edited by June68; 06-05-2012, 12:15 PM. Reason: update food intake
              5' 9" 47 YO F
              PB start June 2, 2012
              Pre PB SW = 180 (no scale at home, Mom's scale January - 153lbs!)
              Current deadlift 245 lbs, squat 165 lbs, bench press 135 lbs


              PB Journal

              Comment


              • #8
                Just back from a 5-mile walk in light mist. Nice.
                5' 9" 47 YO F
                PB start June 2, 2012
                Pre PB SW = 180 (no scale at home, Mom's scale January - 153lbs!)
                Current deadlift 245 lbs, squat 165 lbs, bench press 135 lbs


                PB Journal

                Comment


                • #9
                  Sounds like this east coast dreary isn't stopping you! Great drive I just recently started PB too I have stopped with the sweetener in my coffee though it helps me not have that sweet taste in my mouth in the morning and helps with my cravings especially on my IF days. I weigh myself but also have a pair of pant i want to get into they are so cute. keep up your stride
                  And can I say coming from a short chick you are tall as hell. lol

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I am tempted to lay off the sweetener a bit, but am not too worried about it at this stage. It's only day 4. : )

                    Walking in light rain or mist is the best. I wish it would do that every time I walk. Once I went out and as soon as I got about as far as I get from the house, the skies opened and I was drenched within a minute. All I could do is laugh my head off. Much better getting caught on foot than on a motorcycle though, that always sucks.
                    5' 9" 47 YO F
                    PB start June 2, 2012
                    Pre PB SW = 180 (no scale at home, Mom's scale January - 153lbs!)
                    Current deadlift 245 lbs, squat 165 lbs, bench press 135 lbs


                    PB Journal

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Welcome to the tribe, June! It sounds like you're off to a great start! I'm going to subscribe to your thread so I can follow you.
                      Primal since March 5, 2012
                      SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                      Comment


                      • #12
                        thanks Jenn. It seems like the tribe for me. I haven't read the book (it should arrive today), but I've read a lot of the website and articles so I think I get it pretty well. So far, no carb flu, but hubby was spacey yesterday. Hopefully it passes for him soon.
                        5' 9" 47 YO F
                        PB start June 2, 2012
                        Pre PB SW = 180 (no scale at home, Mom's scale January - 153lbs!)
                        Current deadlift 245 lbs, squat 165 lbs, bench press 135 lbs


                        PB Journal

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          I'm doing a Whole30 right now (which is strict Primal plus no dairy) so I have a bit of a carb flu as I've cut out white potatoes which contributed a lot to my diet. It goes away.
                          Primal since March 5, 2012
                          SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                          Comment


                          • #14
                            I am currently reading the book and am learning a lot more about myself in the process

                            And it took me a few to convince myself to quit the sweeteners I mean full on conversations. lol
                            Last edited by cmlloyd; 06-05-2012, 01:18 PM. Reason: spelling again

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                            • #15
                              Am reading the book now, too. Boy, he needed an editor. Typos galore. Other than that, it makes sense, but then again, the documentary I watched a few weeks ago about a plant based diet being the holy grail did, too. The proof will be in my results.
                              5' 9" 47 YO F
                              PB start June 2, 2012
                              Pre PB SW = 180 (no scale at home, Mom's scale January - 153lbs!)
                              Current deadlift 245 lbs, squat 165 lbs, bench press 135 lbs


                              PB Journal

                              Comment

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