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  • Darling Robin, much aroha coming to you from across the world. How wonderful for both you and Dad, that you were able to share this final journey together. I can feel your pain, your sadness, your love and your peace.
    Memories are precious.
    all my love
    Tracy, x
    "never let the truth get in the way of a good story "

    ...small steps....

    Comment


    • Robin, I'm so sorry for your loss. You gave your father a loving, peaceful final journey. Please take care of yourself.
      Last edited by winencandy; 11-08-2012, 06:44 PM. Reason: typo
      "Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." Kurt Vonnegut
      "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." Douglas Adams
      "Moderation sucks." Suse
      "Wine is a vegetable." Meaty
      "Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow and the day after that." Cmdr Chris Hadfield


      Winencandy

      Comment


      • Robin, You did a wonderful thing for your father in this time. My thoughts are with you today and in the future. Some of the toughest moments come after. When you want to share something with them and they are not there. This last year since I lost my Mom has been that way for me. I spend a lot of time talking to the sky.
        Primal since 9/24/2010
        "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

        Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools
        MFP username: MDAPebbles67

        Comment


        • what a blessing that he died so peacefully. I have admired the relationship you shared with your dad - I grew up without a father. So seeing girls with their dads has always been a fascinating thing to observe. You were truly blessed by him, and were a true blessing to him.

          I pray your time of mourning passes quickly and you are left with all the joy of your memories!
          1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
          2. Eat to heal
          3. Move to live
          4. Embrace today
          5. Live with intention
          6. Respect my body
          7. Cultivate joy
          8. Find my passion
          9. Meditate on peace in my soul

          Comment


          • My condolences, Paleobird. I cannot even being it imagine the pain. Please know I'm thinking of you in this tough time and providing hugs from afar.
            Primal since March 5, 2012
            SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



            Comment


            • Originally posted by jenn26point2 View Post
              My condolences, Paleobird. I cannot even being it imagine the pain. Please know I'm thinking of you in this tough time and providing hugs from afar.
              I second this.

              Strength to you,

              Julie

              Comment


              • I'm so sorry Robin.
                A Woman's Place Is In The Revolution.

                Comment


                • So sorry about dad, Robin. Many thoughts and prayers for you and your family.
                  My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                  "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                  Comment


                  • So sorry for your loss.... My father passed in 2010 in the ICU while I was on a flight over the Atlantic so I'm very happy that you were able to be there for him in those final moments.
                    Went Primal: 20 DEC 2011
                    Starting: 6'1" 220 lbs
                    Starting Energy: "bleh...."
                    Current: 183 lbs @ 8.33% BF (Jackson/Pollock 4 caliper method)
                    Current Energy: "WOOHOO!" See my journal HERE.

                    "Paleo? Try it, but be wary of the cult mentality that comes with it. Paleovangelists are everywhere and a bit scary."

                    Comment


                    • I'm so sorry for your loss

                      Comment


                      • My heartfelt thanks to all my wonderfully MDA pals who have written in with such kind thoughts and supportive words. We have a really strong extended family going in this community.

                        Speaking of family, my sister has had to go back to her home in NorCal. Her husband has had both his knees replaced recently and they seemed to be healing well but then one developed a complication with a "dissolving" suture that didn't dissolve getting infected. So they have to re-open it and hose it out.

                        I understand that she does need to tend to the living first and I can handle taking care of things around here. It's actually kind of peaceful, going through Dad's things by myself, packing up stuff for the Goodwill, putting everything in order.

                        My sister is also incredibly pissed off at me because she found out that several years ago my Dad had signed his house and the land under both houses over to me. He hadn't wanted it to be something that could be "attached" as an asset if he were ever to need long term care in a rest home. He also wanted to make sure that I had a place since my sister already had my uncle's really nice house. So, I guess she figures if she is not going to get anything out of it, why should she put in any effort to help me. She had just been assuming that she was getting half. Yeah. She is pissed.

                        I have enjoyed all of your comments about what a life affirming story this has been and agree with them. Unfortunately however death does have a way of bringing out the nasty underside of human nature as well.

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by Jac View Post
                          I'm crying for you both right now, in sadness for you that he has gone, and in gratitude for the grace and dignity you both brought to the process. Hugs and love.
                          I love you too , Jac.
                          Originally posted by canio6 View Post
                          I am so sorry for your loss. I have read your posts about you and your dad with much fondness - such a great relationship. I am sad to hear he has passed on but glad you were together until the end.
                          He was my best friend as well as my Dad.
                          Originally posted by Finnegans Wake View Post
                          Also sorry for your loss, but so glad that you have a lifetime of wonderful memories of him. Cherish them.
                          I will. Always.
                          Originally posted by Owly View Post
                          Thinking of you. I'm glad you were with him at the end and that it was a peaceful, calm passing.
                          Me too. Thank you Owly.
                          Originally posted by Twibble View Post
                          *hugs*
                          The holidays will be hard. I know I'm more than a bit worried about my mom this Christmas, since my grandfather died on Christmas Day last year.
                          My Mom and Dad died within a few days of each other just 23 years apart.
                          Originally posted by DCarr10760 View Post
                          Hi Paleobird, I've been following along quietly, these past couple of months and I wanted to express my condolences as well. Your situation with your Dad was so like mine was with my Mom at the end. I am heartily sorry for your loss.
                          Your journal speaks so eloquently of the love you felt for him, and the grace with which you all eased his passing.
                          What a beautiful way to transition into whatever is next!
                          Thank you, DCarr. I think a lot of us are/have been/will be facing this same situation. It's never going to be easy.
                          Originally posted by badgergirl View Post
                          Sending love and thoughts. I'm so glad for you both that it was a dignified and peaceful parting.
                          Thank you, badgergirl.
                          Originally posted by Mud Flinger View Post
                          I'm so glad all was peaceful and that you got to take care of him until the end - the ways you have always talked about. We should all be so lucky to have great kids like you! Take some time and take care of yourself now.
                          I guess if you raise your kids well, they *want* to take care of you as opposed to feeling obligated. Who I am today is a testament ot some great parents.
                          Originally posted by kahiba View Post
                          My sincerest condolences. The passing of our parents is a painful stage in the journey of life but the beutiful memories of the years gone by will stay with you forever.
                          Yes, it does feel like a new stage. Really being on my own with no elder guidance to turn to. I'm so glad I still have my BFF/second Mom who is 81. She is making me chicken soup and being very supportive.

                          Comment


                          • Originally posted by peril View Post
                            Robin, its been a privilege to read your blog over the past few weeks. I very much admire the way you've handled your circumstance and your relationship with your father has been very life affirming. My condolences for your loss, which is clearly great, and wishes that your clear strength will carry you through
                            Hi Peril. Thank you, buddy.
                            Originally posted by paleo-bunny View Post
                            I am very saddened to hear this news, but am glad to hear that you were by your Dad's side as he passed away so peacefully. RIP.
                            Thank you. Yes it was calm and peaceful. No pain or fear, just a natural process.
                            Originally posted by Shelli View Post
                            Such a beautiful tribute you wrote to your father! My two words to describe Paleobird would be "strength and grace". Many warm hugs and admonishments to care for yourself. from Shelli.
                            Thank you, Shelli. I will try.
                            Originally posted by Goldie View Post
                            Robin, my thoughts are with you and your sister.
                            Thanks, Goldie.
                            Originally posted by Crabbcakes View Post
                            Hugs, hugs, and more hugs, Paleobird. You both did this so beautifully, if a passing can be said to be so. As you are your father's daughter, he will always be with you, as he is truly a part of you.
                            Hugs back atcha, Crabbcakes.
                            Originally posted by jacmac View Post
                            condolences Robin
                            Thank you, Jackie.
                            Originally posted by Sigi View Post
                            Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss, Robin. Warm hugs to you and yours. I'm wishing your dear Dad a happy journey to wherever he's off to next. You've been such a wonderful daughter - now it's time to take good, loving care of yourself too.
                            xoxo
                            Yes, everybody wants me to take care of myself and I will, really. I'm eating and sleeping and all that.
                            Originally posted by zoebird View Post
                            I am very sorry for your loss, but also very thankful that his death was good -- peaceful, quiet, and quick. I like how you describe it as "efficient."
                            I feared on his behalf -- based on your descriptions of him -- that he would linger in this state of dementia for a long time. It happens to a lot of people, even if they do not wish for it. I know that your father would never have wanted to burden you with such an experience, and I'm thankful that he was able to die as well as he lived, in accordance with all of his values.
                            And so comes another bardo for you. Remember that this time and space is sacred. We will continue to hold you in our thoughts.
                            Thank you for reminding me of that concept of a bardo a while back in this journal, Zoe. It has been really helpful to think of it that way throughout this time. And yes, I'm glad he didn't linger on in that state. That is no way to live. I really think we are kinder to family pets in this society than we are to our elders when it comes to this question.
                            Originally posted by NourishedEm View Post
                            I'm so sorry Robin, much love to you. Xxxx
                            Thanks Em. I have appreciated my down under nurse pals (you and Jac) and all your medical advice throughout this which was often better than I was getting from the doctors.
                            Originally posted by Sabine View Post
                            My condolences, Paleobird. I'm so glad you could be with him through all this, and that he died peacefully. Thinking and praying for you and your sister.
                            Thank you, Sabine. Sometime, when I have all this stuff cleared out and up, I feel like a good extended fast would be cleansing. Interested?

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by NZ primal Gwamma View Post
                              Darling Robin, much aroha coming to you from across the world. How wonderful for both you and Dad, that you were able to share this final journey together. I can feel your pain, your sadness, your love and your peace.
                              Memories are precious.
                              all my love
                              Tracy, x
                              Thank you, Tracy. Yes, the memories are precious.
                              Originally posted by winencandy View Post
                              Robin, I'm so sorry for your loss. You gave your father a loving, peaceful final journey. Please take care of yourself.
                              Thank you, WnC. Yes, I will, I promise.
                              Originally posted by Pebbles67 View Post
                              Robin, You did a wonderful thing for your father in this time. My thoughts are with you today and in the future. Some of the toughest moments come after. When you want to share something with them and they are not there. This last year since I lost my Mom has been that way for me. I spend a lot of time talking to the sky.
                              Yep. I am clearing out all the little stuff like clothes, dishes, photos, and every once in a while I run across something that just brings it all back like finding his glasses where he had left them by his bed before going to the ER.
                              Originally posted by tomi View Post
                              what a blessing that he died so peacefully. I have admired the relationship you shared with your dad - I grew up without a father. So seeing girls with their dads has always been a fascinating thing to observe. You were truly blessed by him, and were a true blessing to him.
                              I pray your time of mourning passes quickly and you are left with all the joy of your memories!
                              I had him for the first 50 yers of my life. I will be better able to live the second 50 and hopefully more because of what he taught me.
                              Originally posted by jenn26point2 View Post
                              My condolences, Paleobird. I cannot even being it imagine the pain. Please know I'm thinking of you in this tough time and providing hugs from afar.
                              Thank you, Jenn.
                              Originally posted by InSearchOfAbs View Post
                              I second this.
                              Strength to you,
                              Julie
                              Thank you, Julie. I can feel all the long distance hugs. It helps.
                              Originally posted by meeme View Post
                              I'm so sorry Robin.
                              Thanks, Meeme.
                              Originally posted by Siobhan View Post
                              So sorry about dad, Robin. Many thoughts and prayers for you and your family.
                              Thank you, Siobhan.
                              Originally posted by BONZ View Post
                              So sorry for your loss.... My father passed in 2010 in the ICU while I was on a flight over the Atlantic so I'm very happy that you were able to be there for him in those final moments.
                              Oh, Bonz, I'm so sorry. Yes, it was good to hold his hand. It kind of makes it more *real*. Like I know he's gone and I can accept it. That would be hard to not be there.
                              Originally posted by lissee View Post
                              I'm so sorry for your loss
                              Thanks, Lissee. Is Vienna still waiting?

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by Paleobird View Post
                                Thank you, Sabine. Sometime, when I have all this stuff cleared out and up, I feel like a good extended fast would be cleansing. Interested?
                                Most definitely. Our job stress looks like it is ending, so I'm ready to turn my focus back to health again. Glad to see you 'up and about'. Hugs.

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