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Primal Journal - Siobhan

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  • Once again my friends here have come through for me, understanding my experiences when the people around me don't have a clue. (Like the landlord who thinks insulation will prevent heat buildup in an upstairs apartment.) The A/C is working great. It is not supposed to be as hot today, although still plenty hot. It didn't cool off very much last night, but I was good with the unit running all night. Very comfortable, not chilly. This morning I moved it into the kitchen, which is also a living area. It is hot there in the morning because it faces east, and it was 80F at 5 AM. It has cooled down nicely. The oddest thing is the cats, who are literally basking in the cool air. They all jumped up on the coffee table and stretched their faces towards the air, like dogs sticking their heads out of a car window. I've never seen cats do that. I've been pleasantly busy cleaning and straightening up the place, as any activity was like torture and the place looks like it has been looted.

    In all the confusion I haven't talked much about my new mattress for the sleeping cave, which is magnificent. Now the little cot is actually more comfortable than my regular bed. It's a little camping pad from LL Bean, which is a combination of foam and air. It has that quality of being both soft and hard at the same time. Very firm and supportive, but cushy. I slept part of the night in there, not sure why. I woke up at some point and went in there, then went back to my regular bed. Slept very well but only 6 hours.

    Full of energy this morning. I'm pretty hungry but I'm too excited to eat.

    I've thought a lot about writing up a success story, but I don't have any before pictures. Also, I'm not really sure about letting go of my privacy to that extent. I have posted pics of myself here, but it's quite another to have thousands of people looking at me on some Friday. I have been writing a sort of memoir, which is of course too long to be a success story. Maybe I should just put something together and post it here. Of course I have a ways to go still. One never really totally gets there. But a lot of things I am working on now aren't dietary. A major focus right now is getting past crippling self-doubt. I'm learning how to look at people and smile, and step out from behind my armour of politeness and be truly involved with others.

    Well, lots of stuff to do, better start!
    Last edited by Siobhan; 07-20-2013, 04:57 AM.
    My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

    "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

    Comment


    • It's amazing to me how when you get your physical being in order, suddenly there's the energy to make ourselves better people in general. I don't know if it's a causal relationship or if we just make progress all aound and the body gets done sooner.

      But now that I'm approaching a good place physically, it is easier to deal with emotional issues that are troublesome in my life.

      I feel ambivalent regarding the whole success strory idea, not that I'm anywhere as close as you to being able to write one, but though inspiring, they all seem so pat, so boiled down. I know they need to be formatted in such a way, but I'm sure any one of them could be a book.

      I'm actually more inspired reading through the journals at the small changes people make, the minor triumphs, struggles and problem solving along the way. I'd love to read more about how these folks maintain their healthy lifestyle, particularly through times of challenge and hardships. I'd also like to know how their lives have changed, becoming healthy. I had a bad experience as a young man losing nearly all of my weight. I wasn't prepared for the consequences and scampered back into the safety and anonymity of obesity.

      Life is so complex (and wonderful). I'll be happy to read your story, once you commit it to paper (pixels).
      Height: 5' 10"
      Starting Weight: 292
      Starting Primal Weight: 275
      Current weight: 224
      Goal weight: 172
      Body Fat 30.5

      Comment


      • You touch on an excellent point, David. For one thing, this is only major change I have ever made in my life that I feel confident that I can stick to. However, I must in fact do that. I've maintained my weight loss for under one year. It's early days yet! After I have done this for at least two years and received good standard physicals from my doctor I will be much more confident in putting myself forward as a success. And I don't want to ever come across as a smug know-it-all, I've-got-all-dialed-in, aren't-you-jealous-you-poor-schlumps.
        My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

        "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

        Comment


        • Eliminating grains from my diet is the best I have ever done for my health. Total elimination. Having said that, I don't think eating wheat has an immediate effect, at least not most of the time. It is the inflammation that builds over time that is so damaging. I haven't tested it on myself, nor will I. I have not the slightest desire to eat grains.
          This is well-written, and reflects my experience exactly. Thank you. People at work think I'm some kind of iron man with resolve to match. Not so. All that stuff doesn't even tempt me, for a host of reasons. Well, ok, pizza will always tempt me. But knowing what it's made of (franchise pizza, at least) keeps the temptation down to just a fond memory.

          Congrats on the cooling. We're headed for 111 degrees today with increasing humidity. I'm going out NOW to play with the dogs, then do some work outside!

          Comment


          • One good thing is that it has been so long since I've eaten "real" pizza that I don't remember what it tastes like. When I first eliminated grains I went to a lot of trouble to try to make a decent primal pizza but I never achieved anything worth making. Now I don't think about it. However, the local uber-pizza place - wood-fired, local ingredients, etc. now has a gluten-free pie. That tempts me a little. Definitely would be a once-a-year treat or something. I have the same experience, BZM, people think I have more superhuman willpower when I have nothing of the kind. Just no desire to eat whatever junk is offered. Now if you put a plate of primal ribs in front of me, you'd better step back right quick and watch your fingers and toes!

            Two sad things to report. One: I strained my back wrestling the A/C up the stairs. Hopefully it is a superficial muscle strain. Now that it is cool in here, I can apply some mild moist heat. Two: the other day I hit a pothole pretty hard coming home from work. After my initial fear that I had damaged a tire proved to be unfounded, I noticed a slight vibration and louder-than-normal noise coming from the right front. Also a slight pull to the right. I must have knocked the wheel out of alignment. At least I hope that is all it is. Since I have been hemorrhaging money lately, I am not happy about even this modest (hopefully) expense.

            Went out for a short hike this morning before it gets too hot. It's not even 10 AM and it is already uncomfortable. Very humid. Funny how the heat doesn't bother me so much now that I can escape it and relax a bit. Came home and found the kitchen, which is also a living area, very comfortable even though the hot sun is pouring through the inadequate shades. Yee-haw!
            My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

            "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

            Comment


            • So glad you and the cats have cool air to refresh yourselves with! (Do not care about the preposition!)

              Interesting thoughts on being a success. I think your experience will be encouraging and inspiring for people to read, but I understand your concerns. I like the idea of waiting until you have 'held' it longer. It makes it more real for me when I read of someone who succeed three YEARS ago, and not just three MONTHS. We have all been through the gain it back phase, and actually maintaining is as much a part of a real success story as just getting there.

              Comment


              • Maybe you could ask friends or family if they have any "before" pics you could use for your success story?

                Even if you don't write up - those of us who follow your journal find great encouragement in your story. And you're right - it isn't over yet...... the journey continues.
                1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                2. Eat to heal
                3. Move to live
                4. Embrace today
                5. Live with intention
                6. Respect my body
                7. Cultivate joy
                8. Find my passion
                9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                Comment


                • Originally posted by Sabine View Post
                  So glad you and the cats have cool air to refresh yourselves with! (Do not care about the preposition!)
                  A preposition at the end of a sentence? That is the type of errant grammar up with which I shall not put! (Thank you, Sir Winston)
                  My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                  "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                  Comment


                  • Originally posted by Siobhan View Post
                    A preposition at the end of a sentence? That is the type of errant grammar up with which I shall not put! (Thank you, Sir Winston)
                    stupid grammatical rules! I barely passed grammer in grade school - but I still managed to win a couple writing contests in college!
                    1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                    2. Eat to heal
                    3. Move to live
                    4. Embrace today
                    5. Live with intention
                    6. Respect my body
                    7. Cultivate joy
                    8. Find my passion
                    9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                    Comment


                    • Glad you've gotten some relief from the heat (with the AC)! Bloody hot here in AZ too but of course everything is air conditioned so we don't suffer quite the same way. I spent 3 summers in Omaha, NE in conditions like what you are dealing with and so I really sympathize. Hope the back and the tire prove to be little problems and not big ones. Stay cool!
                      Breathe. Move forward.

                      I just eat what I want...

                      Comment


                      • Thank you so much! I have great hopes that the back is just a muscle strain, perhaps a little nerve irritation. It responds well to the heat, and so even though the A/C caused the back problem, it is helping me cure it. And I might be overreacting about the car (although I don't think so) because I am hypersensitive to car problems.

                        I think a trip to the beach is in order this afternoon.
                        My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                        "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                        Comment


                        • Sorry to read about your strained muscle. Maybe an epsom salts bath would help?

                          Re, the car. Isn't your vehicle relatively new and still under warranty? I would take it to the dealer and have them take a look. A pothole shouldn't have to damage a car like that. I'm sure they would take care of it. Dealerships like to repair vehicles like that, because they get reimbursed nicely by the car maker, anyway.

                          Or, here is another option - you don't even have to tell them about the pothole. We won't tell.

                          Comment


                          • My back is already feeling better, and is obviously just a little strain. I am being very careful, though, because I know how these back things can go. I can't take a bath, I don't have a bathtub.

                            Physical damage is normally not covered by warranty, and dealers are pretty savvy about the condition of the roads here. Pretty much everyone damages their car and/or tires at some point. I try to be very careful, but once in a while these things jump out and bite. Alignments aren't covered by warranty for certain - I had already asked about that previously.

                            Well, it is the hottest part of the day. I went to the beach, and it was low tide and extremely crowded to boot. Not really very nice. I didn't stay long, but I went in the water. It is unbelievably warm. This is Maine. We're not supposed to be able to wade out into the water and not even be able to tell we are in up to our shoulders because it is so warm. Wonder what this is doing to the sea life? Came home and the kitchen is bearable and the rest of the place is baking hot. The weather people keep promising us a thunderstorm but it never comes. Tonight I hope.

                            I took the opportunity to have sweet potato fries since I can turn on the oven. Mmmmmm mmmmm mmmm. Also had a banana today, so it's been a carb frenzy. I have a little steak and brussels sprouts if I feel like having dinner, or maybe some tuna salad. Not hungry though, so we'll see.
                            My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                            "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                            Comment


                            • I am SO pleased that you have cool air circulating at last!! And the fact that your pussy cats are lined up in front of it says a lot about how hot it has been in your apartment!!! It reminds me of our chickens lined up in front of the fan on the hot days in SC! The ones who were higher in the pecking order got to hang out at the front and get the full force of the air (and this was a pretty large semi- commercial fan that put out some volume!) I hope that the expenses just quit for a while there! What a bummer about those pot holes - they can be really nasty when they jump out like that! You could put some arnica gel on your back and even an Epsom salts 'poultice' or magnesium gel ... hopefully it is a non-issue in no time at all!

                              I can really relate to not even being tempted by grains - I have not touched them since I went off them in Feb 2012. A couple times there has been a little in a sauce at a restaurant and even that tiny amount is enough to establish me on the porcelain throne for hours and hours. Not even close to tempting!
                              Start weight: 225.5 lbs Feb 14th 2012. Height: 5'7"
                              Primal low: 186 lbs
                              Current weight: 221.4 lbs
                              Goal weight: 140 lbs

                              "You are free to choose, BUT you are not free from the consequences of your choices."

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by siobhan View Post
                                i can't take a bath, i don't have a bathtub.
                                what?!

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