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Primal Journal - Siobhan

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  • I didn't know they count stairs! That would be fun.

    Couldn't sleep last night so I took a Benadryl about midnight. Consequently I am a bit groggy this morning! But I slept well, and I feel rested. Having a cup of chai. I read Mark's post with great interest yesterday. I have always made my own chai, something I learned to do when I lived in a working-class neighborhood outside of London and frequented the local Indian food storefront. They got to know us, a group of very poorly paid American flight attendants sharing a run-down house, and invited us to come round the back when the shop in front was closed. The matriarch of the tribe would let us in, pile up a plate for us, and fuss over us as we ate, supplying fresh naan every few minutes. I miss that! I make chai the way she did, by boiling the milk with the spices in it for awhile, then adding the tea, and water near the end. Great stuff.

    Well, my ennui and disillusionment with the world is still with me but greatly lessened. I don't know why I feel like this. I wish I could learn not to worry. I worry about everything. Money. Health. My mom. Worry without positive action is destructive, but I still fall prey to it.
    My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

    "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

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    • Worry is your imagination working for evil instead of good, so how about starting a creative project that requires your imagination? Painting, hand work, wood work, collage?

      Not that, um, I am always able to take this advice, but there it is.

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      • I went to the Y and swam and swam. I'm getting to be pretty good as far as endurance. I can swim for awhile without resting. When I'm good and warmed up and maybe a little bored, I do some sprints.

        It's snowing but no accumulation. Everyone is complaining about how cold it is. Why? It isn't that cold. And it is late November in Maine. It's beautiful and peaceful.

        I took two ornaments from the gift tree at the Y. One is for an eight-year-old girl and says "anything animal." I got a toy horse and rider set. There is a horse and a girl and some tack, so you can saddle the horse and whatnot. Do you think that is okay? Also a little book about how to draw animals, with space to draw. It says age eight+, so I thought she might like that. The pictures in the book are really nice even if you don't draw in it, all sorts of animals.

        The other ornament is more specific, an 11-year-old girl wants the movie "Warhorse." I'll get something else to go with it, I'm not sure what.
        My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

        "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

        Comment


        • I was able to get another horse movie, an old classic called "King of the Wind," totally family friendly. It was only $5, and it pushed me into a gift coupon, so the two films ended up costing less than just the one film.

          When I signed out the ornaments, I asked if there were any guidelines for buying the gifts, and director said, no, anything at all is fine. Anything. Because these kids don't get gifts. They will be happy if they have something to unwrap. That just breaks my heart. I put a twenty in the party jar - they are having a holiday dinner for them. I'm getting all teary-eyed thinking about this. I grew up in pretty limited circumstances, but we always had everything we needed. Clothes, food, warm house, and yes, presents at Christmas and birthdays. I don't want to go too overboard buying for the two girls I already have, because I think I should take another ornament or two and make sure everyone has something. Some of the ornaments asked for things like boots, coats, and snowpants. Yikes. I will make sure someone takes them by next week. I'm not a rich person. I'm just a worker bee-type person. And buying the car has set me back considerably. I don't have a lot of extra but I already have everything I need. I certainly have enough warm clothes, boots, and coats to last the rest of my life. Okay, I have to stop thinking about this or I will get too upset.
          My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

          "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

          Comment


          • I'm sorry you are feeling ennui and disillusionment with the world. I am glad it's getting a bit better. I am feeling much the same (even before my car was broken into). I wonder if it is just the onset of Winter. My Doctor told me to get one of those lamps to help with light levels and SAD, I'm not sure it helps though.

            I used to take anti-depressants, but I really don't like taking pills so I don't. I just try to be cognizant of my moods and I forgive myself for not getting as much exercise as I should. In the past I'd eat and drink too much, especially around the holidays, which ultimately made matters worse.

            It sounds like you are doing all of the right things. I hope you feel better soon!
            Height: 5' 10"
            Starting Weight: 292
            Starting Primal Weight: 275
            Current weight: 224
            Goal weight: 172
            Body Fat 30.5

            Comment


            • Originally posted by Sabine View Post
              Worry is your imagination working for evil instead of good, so how about starting a creative project that requires your imagination? Painting, hand work, wood work, collage?

              Not that, um, I am always able to take this advice, but there it is.
              I just saw one of those inspirational quote thingies on facebook that said, "Worrying is like praying for things you don't want to happen." I don't know about prayer particularly, but it certainly is like meditating with negativity.
              Height: 5' 10"
              Starting Weight: 292
              Starting Primal Weight: 275
              Current weight: 224
              Goal weight: 172
              Body Fat 30.5

              Comment


              • Okay, full disclosure here. I made a batch of tapioca flour popovers (my term) and ate three of them. That is 3 three-inch round popover thingys. Actually, calorie and macro-wise, it is not that bad. I ate them hot from the oven with Kerrygold butter. Yummy noises were made. It was worth it. If I had a primal restaurant, I would greet every diner with a basket of these golden lovelies. They would be repeat customers for certain. It doesn't hurt that my bright orange-yoked pastured eggs turn them a lovely color.

                I have some lamb chops marinating, and I have already made a mushroom sauce and the brussels sprouts can go in the oven with the chops. Yowzah!
                My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                Comment


                • That is so true, David, it is almost like a self-fulfilling prophesy to worry excessively and without any real purpose. Instead of worrying, I need to ask myself, "What can I do to fix this?' And then do it! But sometimes I just fall into this worrying trap.
                  My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                  "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                  Comment


                  • Sounds like the food is cheering you up. Buying presents for those kids sounds like a good mood-lifter too. I know that isn't why you did it, but it really is more blessed to give than receive. When we think about the need out there, it is easy to get upset. But there's no way we can meet all the needs, so at least meeting a couple of them is a wonderful thing, for everybody involved.
                    5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
                    Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
                    Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again

                    More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
                    - Lewis Mumford

                    Comment


                    • Up very early on this cold and frosty morning - probably the coldest so far this winter. I made a fire in the woodstove before the sun was up! Getting ready to fill up the firewood box and then go to the pool.

                      Had a great dinner last night, fought madly with the carnivores over it, and couldn't finish. The mark of a true primal meal. Cats desire it and it is so filling it can't be finished. That means I can have the same meal again tonight! Well, I ate all the brussels sprouts. I thought I had burned them, but no, they were perfect. Crunchy on the outside and tender on the inside. Might get some more of those. Bacon and coffee for breakfast. Okay, must start my day.
                      My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                      "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                      Comment


                      • Your cats sound so much more primal than when you first started on here - I mean you guys fighting over meat! Think back to the old days ... love it! Aaaah, nothing like a fire in the stove when it is cold out and you can toast yourself in front of it! Enjoy your day...
                        Start weight: 225.5 lbs Feb 14th 2012. Height: 5'7"
                        Primal low: 186 lbs
                        Current weight: 221.4 lbs
                        Goal weight: 140 lbs

                        "You are free to choose, BUT you are not free from the consequences of your choices."

                        Comment


                        • Yeah, we used to fight over bread! And we were fat. Now we are much trimmer and sit in front of the woodstove and fight over meat.

                          I was at the bookstore in the next town and saw some art supplies on sale at a very good price so I bought them as I remember an ornament on the gift tree requesting art supplies. Of course when I stopped by there just now it was gone! But never fear, I think I will be able to find someone to give these to, or I can even save them for next year. Actually I find this whole gift tree thing profoundly depressing. There is so much poverty and need, and this is just a small community! Why do some people have so much and others have so little? Why why why? You can drive yourself crazy asking that question!

                          I bought myself a prezzie. Perfume. I haven't worn perfume in years. Last week I tried some in a shop and really liked it. Very citrusy. So. Now I smell like a blood orange.

                          I made two little pizzas with the last two tapioca breads. Very satisfactory. The edges get so nice and crispy in the oven, and it is sturdy enough to pick up.

                          I just got home and the wind is howling. And I must mention that the sunset is absolutely stunning. You have to see these colors to believe them!
                          Last edited by Siobhan; 11-29-2012, 02:02 PM.
                          My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                          "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                          Comment


                          • DIL served me some fantastic brussel sprouts the other day, cut in half, sauteed and drizzled with olive oil and seasonings. I am going to try it. Holding off on the pizza this week, as I've sworn off starchy foods for the present. I want to see new numbers on the scale, and it's not going to happen if I keep "comforting" myself.

                            Yay, perfume! I've made a point of wearing it regularly the last few years. I actually use up the bottles now. It's all part of the self-respect and treating myself like I actually matter thing. I don't even wait for hubby to be home, although he does appreciate it when I wear it. He bought me a sampler of small Chanel bottles a Christmas or two ago, so I work my way through those.
                            5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
                            Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
                            Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again

                            More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
                            - Lewis Mumford

                            Comment


                            • Had to go to a training class this morning, came home, rested, and now have to go back to work. Food today has been mostly bacon.
                              My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                              "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                              Comment


                              • Well, here I am at work. Still melancholy. I don't know why. I've been singing Christmas carols. (No one can hear me, I'm alone in this wing at night.) Also practicing the songs for Sunday. I don't particularly like any of the choices. But it is the first Sunday of Advent. Also Communion Sunday and the Greening of the Church. A really nice day.

                                Been pretty uninterested in food the last few days and the scale said 132 this afternoon. I don't think it is real, it is just because I haven't been eating much. Despite my tapioca bread gluttony (which wasn't all that bad) my intake has been pretty low.

                                Wish I could go swimming.
                                My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                                "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                                Comment

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