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  • I'm in the same boat regarding catching up... I don't read over the weekend b/c I have two kids with demands and time with the family, etc. Oh well. Passes the time nicely at work.
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



    Comment


    • I'm in a really grouchy mood today............. thats not normal for me. Not sure whats up. I think it has to do with the scales.

      So I got all the paperwork weeded through - bills paid - junk put in the recycle - quickbooks caught up and account balanced. Its all good!

      I'm drinking Skinny Girl Pina Colada............. its not very good. Certainly not as good as a real Pina Colada. Very weak and watery. Maybe I put too much ice in the glass.

      Lets see what other random thoughts can I come up with???? I'm bored. Hubby is at bible study.

      The office is going through a facelift. New paint, new carpet, new windows and some new siding. Also getting the parking lot overhaul. What this means is a lot of chaos in the office --- which could be why I'm grouchy too. My work area is in total chaos and its a bit unnerving. When its all done it will be great - cuz the office seriously needed a facelift. The paint is only about 10 years old - but it was this putrid vomit green. The carpet was probably 25 years old...... also a nauseating green. All good changes, but its the pits during the work.

      The christmas tree fell over - its still outside, sitting in a bucket of water - when it feel it knocked over my favorite terra cotta pot filled with Hens and Chicks.............. I bought that pot at the Goodwill - it was a GREAT find!!! Now its in a hundred peices on the patio. Its one of those "strawberry pots" ....... you know the kind with the little cups sticking out of the sides all the way around. I LOVED it........ now its broken. Dang it. I will have to find a new pot for the Hens and Chicks.............

      Its random thought night at Tomi's Journal.

      sorry.......... I'm done now.
      1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
      2. Eat to heal
      3. Move to live
      4. Embrace today
      5. Live with intention
      6. Respect my body
      7. Cultivate joy
      8. Find my passion
      9. Meditate on peace in my soul

      Comment


      • okay............... 4 nights in a row of rum and diet coke. and a few chocolate chip cookies from costco. what am I doing? how stupid!!! I'm not helping myself by making stupid, bad choices like that! and this morning I had 2 fried eggs with 7 oreo cookies! Nice............ dumb dumb dumb!!!

        I was called for jury duty - but my number didn't get called so I didn't have to report. Now I wait for the next time they pull my name out of the pot.

        I finally made an appointment at Costco to have my eyes checked and get new glasses. I bought real prescription glasses for the first time about a year and a half ago........ paid over $600 to my eye doctor............ and I've hated them every single day! They are the progessive lenses with tri-focals. I can't wear them when I'm walking around cuz I trip over things and bump into things - so most of the time they are perched atop my head -- until I need to read something, then I will put them on. They are the frameless kind - and VERY easily get bent out of shape. I actually folded them completely in half once when I had them hanging in my shirt front and they've never been quite right since then. So anyway - I'm getting seamless bi-focals this time - with frames that won't bend out of shape! what a waste of $600!

        Office Christmas potluck is this friday - I'm trying to figure out how to get out of going to the party. I just don't like to do social stuff at work. If I'm going to be at the office I want to be on the clock, and getting paid to be there - not socializing with a bunch of people I don't really care to get to know on a personal level. My eye appointment is at 10 so I'm hoping it will just take a really long time and I can have a good excuse for not going to the party. I hate to be anti-social but honestly, I don't find any reason to have these things.

        Just talked to my son.......... he had a house inspection this morning on a house he's made an offer on. Looks like its a GO! There were some small details that needed to be addressed - like some light switches that weren't working - little things - but the roof and foundation are good and no dry rot! So, I guess this means my son will soon be moving into his own home! We've told him he can take the sectional and the fridge cuz we've been wanting to get new ones! Yeah! Also will be sending dishes and flatware with him so I get to go shopping! How exciting! He's finally going to be out on his own - and we're finally going to be empty nesters! Probably won't happen till after the holidays though.

        YEAH!!!!!!
        Last edited by tomi; 12-11-2012, 01:01 PM.
        1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
        2. Eat to heal
        3. Move to live
        4. Embrace today
        5. Live with intention
        6. Respect my body
        7. Cultivate joy
        8. Find my passion
        9. Meditate on peace in my soul

        Comment


        • Congratulations on the soon to be empty nest!! And goodie on going shopping for replacements for all the stuff that is being sent with him I can really relate to the office parties!!! Hopefully you can figure out a way to either not get there or have to leave early! Hubby got some glasses a couple of years ago that never worked for him, and then he lost them (thank heavens as he was getting horrid headaches from them) Hopefully he can get some that actually help versus hinder! Hope your new glasses are comfortable and last a long time...
          Start weight: 225.5 lbs Feb 14th 2012. Height: 5'7"
          Primal low: 186 lbs
          Current weight: 221.4 lbs
          Goal weight: 140 lbs

          "You are free to choose, BUT you are not free from the consequences of your choices."

          Comment


          • Hi Tomi. Office parties are designed to build commeraderie and a sense of team/oneness. I personally enjoy them b/c I'm a social person, but ours are different in that we do ours during duty hours, so we're paid to attend.

            Glad to hear son's inspection went well. Exciting news!

            Hope the new glasses work out. Brad has been wearing glasses forever (well, contacts) and keeps talking about getting lasik done. Someday we'll be able to afford it. Someday... *dreaming*
            Primal since March 5, 2012
            SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



            Comment


            • Jenn - I would LOVE to do the party if I was getting paid for it. But they do it during lunch break - so, no pay. I used to be a very social person - but as I'm getting older I'm finding I just don't have that spark anymore. I work in a small doctors office - there are 7 full time employees and 3 part time. The 7 include the doc and the PA. I'm only there for about 10-15 hours a week as is it, and my work doesn't require that I interact much with anyone, except the manager. If the party fell on a day that I am scheduled to work it might be different - but Friday's are my day to do boatshop business, and personal stuff - so I really don't want to go into the office for an hour of visiting. I'm wrestling with what to do........... The menu is "traditional christmas" so Ham, rolls, potatos, etc. I'm sure lots of desserts as well.

              Coll - I'm very much looking forward to getting glasses that I can ware and not have to constantly bend back into shape and try to get the lenses in the right place to see through that small focal point. I hate these things! Maybe I should just do readers from the drug store!

              my weight is going to wrong direction! boy - it doens't take much of the wrong stuff for my body to start hording calories! I didn't even eat enough calories to gain ONE pound over the past week.......... but, the scales have gone back up 6 pounds. It has to be water weight - bloat caused by the rum I'm sure. When will learn? Hubby and I need to find a new "lets kick back and relax" weekend activity........... cuz the rum is killing my weight loss goals. UGH - and I'm always so mad at myself when I see the scales climbing.

              Last night I was hurting and feeling so sluggish........ I told hubby I sure can feel it when I stray off the path. Stupid choices. I have significantly cut back on the rum - but its not enough. I need to significantly STOP. Plus I ate cookies............ so stupid.

              I woke up with a sore throat and general feeling of "getting sick". I woke up at 4:30 after having one of those dreams that just totally upsets you! I seem to always dream that my purse is stolen - with all my important things in it! I wonder why that is such a fear of mine. And in the dreams its always that my purse is left in an unlocked car and then someone steals the car. So, not only does the thief have my purse but also my house keys and access to all my banking stuff............ So, I lay there and try to calm myself down - then I have to get up and go downstairs and make sure my purse is safe and sound where I always keep it. Good grief!

              I bought a set of flatware yesterday at Target - Oneida 45 peice 18/10. Its service for 8, plus the serving set. It was only $80. I decided to go back this afternoon and get the additional service for 4 for $36. Having a service for 12 makes things easier I think. I found a set of dishes that I liked too, but they didn't have them in stock. I might see if they are available online. I'm enjoying getting new stuff. We have been using the compilation of what he had and what I brought when we got married. So its all old - and some of it is second hand. Time for a fresh new start with the boy leaving the nest and all.

              I should be getting ready for work soon so better get off here.
              1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
              2. Eat to heal
              3. Move to live
              4. Embrace today
              5. Live with intention
              6. Respect my body
              7. Cultivate joy
              8. Find my passion
              9. Meditate on peace in my soul

              Comment


              • Tomi, personally, if I had the day off, I would not go to the Christmas party. Especially if you don't feel the need to socialize with anyone.

                Regarding silverware... I get mine at Dollar General. A 4 pack of forks is $1... lol I think I got 4 of these, 4 of the spoon packs, and 3 or 4 of the knives and it only cost me 11 or 12 bucks. They work great and look decent too. I don't like heavy or chunky silverware and I find most of the expensive stuff is too heavy or chunky for my tastes.

                Weird about the dreams... I guess we all have our secret fears - that are valid fears, nonetheless. I always have dreams where I'm looking for something or running from something - can't ever remember what it is that I'm searching for/running from. I read up on it once but can't remember what those kind of dreams are supposed to me, just remember that they're related to anxiety.
                Primal since March 5, 2012
                SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                Comment


                • funny how we all have different tastes.......... I love the heavy chunky silverware - not the lightweight "diner" stuff. I've always had the cheap stuff - and always wanted the "good" stuff. So I finally got it.

                  A counselor once told me that dreams are just the mind trying to work through something. I think my fear of having my purse stolen or lost comes from my feelings of insecurity and vulnerability. I've never been one of those confident, in control type of women. I always feel a bit fearful. Not a trait I'm particularily fond of - but I think it comes from growing up fatherless. Women develope so much of their confidence and self-worth from the love and nurturing they get from their father. I didn't have that - and mom was too self absorbed in her own little world to be much help in that department.
                  1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                  2. Eat to heal
                  3. Move to live
                  4. Embrace today
                  5. Live with intention
                  6. Respect my body
                  7. Cultivate joy
                  8. Find my passion
                  9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                  Comment


                  • funny how we all have different tastes.......... I love the heavy chunky silverware - not the lightweight "diner" stuff. I've always had the cheap stuff - and always wanted the "good" stuff. So I finally got it.

                    A counselor once told me that dreams are just the mind trying to work through something. I think my fear of having my purse stolen or lost comes from my feelings of insecurity and vulnerability. I've never been one of those confident, in control type of women. I always feel a bit fearful. Not a trait I'm particularily fond of - but I think it comes from growing up fatherless. Women develope so much of their confidence and self-worth from the love and nurturing they get from their father. I didn't have that - and mom was too self absorbed in her own little world to be much help in that department.
                    1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                    2. Eat to heal
                    3. Move to live
                    4. Embrace today
                    5. Live with intention
                    6. Respect my body
                    7. Cultivate joy
                    8. Find my passion
                    9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                    Comment


                    • I'm sick............. feels like flu - but I had a flu shot. Headachy - body achy - sore throat. getting my jammies on - letting hubby wait on me - sitting on the couch all evening.
                      1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                      2. Eat to heal
                      3. Move to live
                      4. Embrace today
                      5. Live with intention
                      6. Respect my body
                      7. Cultivate joy
                      8. Find my passion
                      9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by tomi View Post
                        A counselor once told me that dreams are just the mind trying to work through something. I think my fear of having my purse stolen or lost comes from my feelings of insecurity and vulnerability. I've never been one of those confident, in control type of women. I always feel a bit fearful. Not a trait I'm particularily fond of - but I think it comes from growing up fatherless. Women develope so much of their confidence and self-worth from the love and nurturing they get from their father. I didn't have that - and mom was too self absorbed in her own little world to be much help in that department.
                        With you on that! My father died when I was 12 - shortly afterwards I read an article in a psychology magazine that was all about how that was the absolute worst age for a girl to lose her father, as you say her self-esteem comes largely from dad, and that is a prime development age. And here I am at age 53 still remembering that article like I just read it.
                        My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                        "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by tomi View Post
                          I'm sick............. feels like flu - but I had a flu shot. Headachy - body achy - sore throat. getting my jammies on - letting hubby wait on me - sitting on the couch all evening.
                          This drives me bonkers every year... the flu shot does not protect against what everyone thinks is the flu. It protects against the respiratory flu that kills people - not the pukey/poopy flu. That is caused by a gut virus, not a lung virus.

                          In 2007, October timeframe, the army gave me a flu shot. My dr told me they issued it too early and not to expect it to work b/c the flu season was predicted to come early spring. Sure enough, April 2008, I was up and down feeling really crappy, but not puking/pooping. One day I'd feel great, the next I'd feel like death warmed over... I had a fever, felt very lethargic, and all this other crap, dizzy, winded easily, just in general wiped out. But because I was doing change-over in the Army (b/c I was being discharged and someone else was taking my place) I had to go to work every day. I felt like garbage. But, I thought it was a cold that just wouldn't go away. I went to urgent care and they told me I had bronchial pneumonia. Then my ears plugged up. That threw my balance off and I got dizzy a lot, so I went to the VA hospital for a check up. The VA decided to do a second chest xray to look for pneumonia b/c they didn't think it was pneumonia and did an influenza test (which included snorting saline and doing a farmer's blow into a sample cup). During the chest xray the clinic called the radiologist and told them to put a mask on me b/c I had gotten influenza A - the bad one (but not the one known as Swine flu - that came in 2009 when I was pregnant with Makenna).

                          Anyhow, there is DEFINITE difference between what people call the flu, and what is protected against by a flu shot. BIG difference. I'd MUCH rather have the stomach virus b/c that's gone in a couple of days. The Flu A that I had kicked my ass for two weeks. I always thought they were the same thing until that spring... Oy, it was NOT fun.

                          FWIW, the doctor told me the reason I still go the flu while having a flu shot is b/c they gave it to me so early and the CDC had predicted a late flu season and advised doctors to hold off on flu shots until December b/c taking it early would allow the flu virus to mutate to overcome the flu shot...

                          Anyhow, it's a general misconception that the flu shot prevents the pukey flu, but it does not. With that, I hope you feel better super soon.
                          Primal since March 5, 2012
                          SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                          Comment


                          • So sorry you're feeling sick, Tomi. Not fun.

                            I wonder if your body isn't functioning in famine mode, when it hoards every calorie it can get, and tries to pack on weight every chance it gets, and develops very intense cravings for fattening food. That's the result of trying to lose weight too fast, for too long. Our bodies need a break from deprivation, or they go into defensive mode. You might be better off forgetting about trying to lose for a while, and just concentrate on eating healthy and maintaining your weight until it is effortless. Keep in mind, I am not an expert, so I could be out to lunch on this. Do some research on ghrelin if you're interested.

                            Father issues. Hmm. I didn't go through what you and Siobhan did, (it was my mother who left at a very vulnerable age) but my father was very distant emotionally, so I did very much crave masculine attention. But at least I didn't have to deal with the security issues.
                            5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
                            Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
                            Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again

                            More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
                            - Lewis Mumford

                            Comment


                            • Oy - parent issues. We do the best we can when coming out of a "less than perfect" childhood - but there are always scars and wounds to deal with. The concept of having a father is completely foreign to me........ my dad died when my mom was just 3 months pg with me.

                              So - i'm not quite so achy today - just weak and blurry brained. My sinuses are trying to fill and my upper throat has that tightness and tenderness. Flu or just an URI? Either way - I'm not going to work which is fine cuz my work station is in total disarray from the new carpet thats going in. Boss texted and told me I didn't need to come in if I felt icky. Its nice to have the boss say "stay home" instead having to make that dreadful "calling in sick" phone call. I've always hated having to do that.

                              I haven't walked in 3 days now............. I'm going through withdrawls.

                              Jenn - I haven't had the vomit/poopy type of tummy virus in a very long time. Thankfully!!!! Yes, most people will call that the "stomach flu" but its not a flu at all. Its a bacterial or viral thing. Usually when one person in the house gets it - everyone gets it! Very contagious. Real flu is body and head aches, swollen glands, fever, chills, coughing and sometimes stuffy head. Of which I am exhibiting every symptom!! So, I guess I will have to say this is the flu and not just a cold. I was lucky enough to get swine flu the year it was going around. 104.5 fever.......... sicker than sick for a solid week! One day I told my husband I thought I was going to die! and I truly meant it!!! Actually, a classmate from high school did die from Swine flu. This current illness will pass quickly I think.

                              Yesterday I ate 3 strips of bacon, an orange, about a cup of mashed cauliflower and 3 oz of ham. Total calories, less than 500. So not much food - but not much appetite, I'm just listening to my body. Today - no food so far. Its noon. I've had a cup of green tea with pomagranate. and about to have another.............

                              Weight today 185.6. Nowhere near where I wanted to be but, what can I do? I shouldn't have relaxed over the weekend and had rum and cookies. Even though I still kept my calories at weight loss numbers............ the rum and sugar and grains just kill me. I have got to find a better way to relax ---- and not have it be in going LAX in my diet. Maybe a weekend movie - or some other kind of weekend treat is what I need.

                              Hubby's mouth peice isn't completely stopping his snoring but has reduced it to tolerable levels! Most of the night he is silent - once in a while he will snore - but its not that roof rumbling snore that wakes me up and keeps me up for hours! So, all in all I will call the mouth peice a success.

                              Son put earnest money into escrow He's waiting for the sewer pipe report and then will decide what things he will ask the seller to fix. Simple little things that should have been done before the house was ever put on the market. A couple of wall outlets are not working, there is no door knob on the back door (dead bolt only I guess) - not anything major. If all goes smoothly he will be closing by mid-january. Wow............ this has been a long road - and I wasn't sure if I would ever see him get to this place in his life. Having a kid with severe social anxiety is tough!! Getting him through school was a nightmare - a boy with an IQ of 142 shouldn't be flunking his courses!! He never missed a day of school.......... but he wouldn't do his homework. A classic genious under-acheiver!! But, he finally got himself together and is handling his anxieties and taking control of his life. I'm proud of him! He's a good kid - doesn't drink or smoke - and his anxieties have kept him out of any type of social stuff --- so, at the age of 26 he has yet to have a girlfriend. Honestly........ I don't think he's ever even kissed a girl. I do know he's straight - cuz he's been in trouble several times for looking at internet porn - as a teen - if he looks at it now - I can't do anything about it! ........... and he makes it very known he would love to find a girl to spend time with. He doesn't want kids.......... and for that I'm thankful because honestly - he wouldn't make a good father. I had him tested for Aspergers and Autism when he was younger because he displays traits of both syndroms. Came out neg to both - just severe social anxiety (causing him to be socially retarded) and boarderline agoriphobic. I think he's doing well at tackling both. In a month he will be moving out and taking on the role of a homeowner. thats a big leap!!!! Can't say I'm not nervous for him.......... but this is what he wants to do. I'd rather see him move into an apartment before taking on the enormous responsibility of owning your own home. But he has his reasons for taking this route and I need to just support him.

                              I'm rambling because I can't do anything today except take it easy......... and I hate watching TV during the day - I love the house nice and quiet.

                              So far I'm finding little benefit to taking the MACA root supplements. I am only at 1050 mgs a day though - and Marks article said something about taking up to 3 grams per day. I do feel a bit more energy that I can attribute to the addition of the MACA to my pile of pills. Today I'm going increase the dose to 2100 mgs. thats 2 pills in the morning and 2 pills with dinner. I've do that for a month and then try to increase it to 3 grams. They are 525 mgs capsules - so I'll have to go to 6 pills = 3150 mgs. I hope thats not too much. Maybe will just go to 5 pills. 2 in the morning and 3 with dinner. If I don't see a marked increase in my libido - I will stop taking them. The added energy isn't worth the money.

                              I'm not sure adding potassium is doing anything for the hands and feet cramping either. Doc said to take more, but I'm not seeing a real big difference. Seems to come in waves - I'll have lots of cramping for a while and then it goes away for awhile. Very weird. I think I'm going to be cutting down on some of the supplements soon. I take:

                              Multi-vitamin and minerals
                              Super B Complex
                              Vitamin C - 1000 mg
                              Calcium 1000 mg (that has a bunch of other stuff in it too) I should probably take 2000 mg.
                              Vitamin D3 - 8000 units
                              Vitamin E - 400 units
                              Iron - 18 mg
                              Potassium - 1200 mg
                              Seriphos (for adrenal support) not really sure whats in it - but the doc told me to take it. It says "Phosophorylated Serine/Ethanolamine" 1000 mg Proprietary Blend
                              MACA - 2100 mg currently

                              when the Seriphos is gone I won't buy more. I'm going to stop the Potassium cuz I don't think it really helps with the cramping. I'll keep taking everything else I guess. Unless the MACA doesn't show a great improvement on my libido and then its out too.

                              boring huh???
                              1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                              2. Eat to heal
                              3. Move to live
                              4. Embrace today
                              5. Live with intention
                              6. Respect my body
                              7. Cultivate joy
                              8. Find my passion
                              9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                              Comment


                              • I don't see any magnesium in your list. That might help with the cramping.
                                Primal since March 5, 2012
                                SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



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