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Fibromyalgia and Fat - Tomi's story

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  • Sabine - I like you list - I may steal it!

    Jenn - you know it! We may have a few years of freedom in our home before my mother has to move in with us. For now, she is very healthy at the age of 87, but is going blind. She'll stay in her home as long as she can, and then I think will move in with us. I'm not looking forward to that time, but you do what you have to. She doesn't have the funds to go to a care center. My home is the only one that is really accomodating to her needs. The room my son is currently using is off the family room, she can use that as her bedroom, the family room can be her living space, and the downstairs bath is right there next to that family room so that can be her bathroom too. She will have to use the only kitchen in the house - but I don't think she will be doing any cooking by then. I'm HOPING one of my other sisters offers to have her come live with them, we shall see.

    UGH - so tired. I slept approx. 5 hours last night - not getting out of bed until 9 am and then sleeping a bit more on the sofa, until the phone rang and it was that stupid "we can lower you current credit card rate" call! I can't wait to get rid of our land line! All we get on it is advertising crap.

    I think all the bacon yesterday caused a bit of water retention - back up to 184.2 again. So I'll push water like crazy today and drink a lot of herbal tea. That should cause a nice flush of the system! I'm also planning a fast until dinner today. I had a little binge on almond butter last night when I couldn't sleep. Healthy, but loaded with calories! So, its water and herbal tea with stevia for me. I'll walk this afternoon, after work. I want to get to work a little earlier to day so I can get in my walk before dark - I really hate walking in the dark. Its a little spooky - but also hard to see if there is things to stumble over.

    I'm wishing this weight loss was moving along a bit faster. I get so frustrated when I read those "the weight just FELL right off of me" stories! GRRRR --- nice for you, but shut the hell up already! For the other 99% of us, its a grueling day to day struggle and a long drawn out process! I love the drops - and then as always, the bounce back follows! I should focus on the drops and stop letting the ups get me down. I DO KNOW that if I stay on the program and do what works the weight will continue to drop - EVER. SO. SLOWLY. Sometimes I wish SPEED was still a legal weight loss aid!

    Speaking of "drugs" I've been thinking about this trend toward legalizing pot. The state of Washington recently legalized the use of pot - but its still illegal to buy it, sell it, or grow it. So...........legalizing the smoking of it is sorta useless. Right? Honestly I think if beer, wine and hard liquor is legal - pot should be legal as well. If we just let people grow it for personal use then the drug cartels in Mexico will be put out of business! At least the pot industry will come to a screetching hault. Selling it should be regulated and taxed. You want to sell it, you need a commercial license and you have to pay taxes on what you grow and sell. It should be monitored and inspected to see that nothing "foreign" is being added to the mix. Would I smoke it? no........ but, its not a substance that is any different than beer, wine or liquor, so why is it so illegal?

    man - having tummy troubles today................ wow............... must have been that almond butter binge at 2 AM. I bet I ate 1/2 cup of the stuff! Its so good!!! But, it replaced my addiction to peanut butter, so thats troublesome. I'm on my last jar of almond butter and I've decided not to buy more. I'm trying to eliminate all sources of binge eating. I think I've tackled the chocolate monster now - not having any chocolate since 10/7, so nearly 2 months. I haven't bought any dark chocolate for about 3 months now the m&m's were my last taste of chocolate. And since it causes such tummy issues I don't think I will have trouble saying no to that. Hubby had a bag of peanut m&ms on the trip to Seattle and I didn't touch them. So, no chocolate, no nut butters and no nuts (except on road trips) --- those seem to be my binge triggers. I will have to have something in the house to replace those things for when the desire for snacking arises. What? Jerky? I haven't found a jerky that I really like. Its always too sweet or too peppery. And ALWAYS to leathery!! Why can't they make it like my grandad used to make it? NEVER tough and leathery! Maybe I should make my own........... thats a thought. We do have a smoker and I do know how to use it. We also have a meat slicer - and a freezer full of grass fed beef. I could also make some salmon jerky. I want my hubby to make some smoked salmon - but his brine has brown sugar in it. I wonder if I could get him to make it with honey and mollases instead? Need to do some searching on that.......

    better go get ready to work. I have to stop at the banks on my way in. Sorry for the rambling thoughts........... sometimes I just need to get things out of my head and work them through.
    1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
    2. Eat to heal
    3. Move to live
    4. Embrace today
    5. Live with intention
    6. Respect my body
    7. Cultivate joy
    8. Find my passion
    9. Meditate on peace in my soul

    Comment


    • Alton Brown has a good jerky marinade recipe that my whole family liked. Comes right up when you google.

      Comment


      • Originally posted by tomi View Post
        Its Sunday morning. The weekend has been great - we got the entire tree cut into rounds, and almost all the branches cleaned up and shredded (borrowed a friends shredder!). Hubby is finishing up the last bit of the shredding this morning as everyone else goes to church (his surprise to BIL) I'm nursing an aching stomach and frequent trip to the bathroom --- India food last night. I ordered Tandoori Mixed Grill. It was WONDERFUL tasting - but not fun on the digestive system.

        As for Raccoons......... they can be very mean and they carry rabbies. People are pretty cautious of them around here. They are fun to watch though - as long as they don't get too close.

        Big surprise....... I stepped on the scales at BILs house and it says 179. I'm not sure if thats accurate or not - but several others in the house weighed and told me it was weighing them correctly. If thats right - then I am a very happy girl! Will have to wait to see what the scales at home tell me. I have to say I'm feeling much lighter - so who knows? Could be all those veggie binges!

        We're heading back home in a few hours - after lunch - and its a 4 hour drive. I need to get showered while everyone else is out of the house. Hope y'all have a great day!
        Ah, maybe your scales weigh heavy... Veggie binges are the best. One evening I was starving, so I nuked a half a head of cauliflower, drizzled it with brown butter and ate the entire thing. Oh, it felt good...

        I have never been able to figure out the daily ups and downs of the scales. Sometimes there's no rhyme or reason to them. But I can pretty much guarantee you that if you keep up the way you are, you will win. By losing... I've had quite a few "rubber numbers", ones that I just kept bouncing off of over and over again. But sooner or later I broke through.

        Man, you are really reminding me I need to get some more exercise. Especially from the waist up. My legs are in decent shape from the walking.
        5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
        Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
        Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again

        More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
        - Lewis Mumford

        Comment


        • Originally posted by Sabine View Post
          Alton Brown has a good jerky marinade recipe that my whole family liked. Comes right up when you google.
          Awesome I love it when other people do the research for me! Now........ can you research paleo/bipolar please? Just kidding!
          1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
          2. Eat to heal
          3. Move to live
          4. Embrace today
          5. Live with intention
          6. Respect my body
          7. Cultivate joy
          8. Find my passion
          9. Meditate on peace in my soul

          Comment


          • Judg --- it doesn't have any pattern or reason does it? Just bounces all over the place! Here's a funny story: (tmi warning) This morning I weighed when I got up, then again after each time I had a bm (diarrhea this morning) ............. every time I stepped on the scale it was a bigger number! I started at 184.2 - and the last time I checked it had climbed up to 185. How can I gain .8 pounds when I'm flushing so much down the toilet? I did have water a tea during the whole ordeal - maybe that was it. It just makes me laugh though......... it seems like the weight of the bm leaving my body would cause the my body weight to drop but nope --- and its not just this time - its consistant. I often weigh after going to the bathroom. Those ounces can really help the overall mood of the day!
            1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
            2. Eat to heal
            3. Move to live
            4. Embrace today
            5. Live with intention
            6. Respect my body
            7. Cultivate joy
            8. Find my passion
            9. Meditate on peace in my soul

            Comment


            • Tomi, I hear your pain of the scale being ever so slow to make changes. I do envy the people who can just drop the weight off and keep it off. But, we'll just have to keep cheering each other on and eventually we'll have the before AND after pictures! I have plenty of before and a few during but am a loooongg way off the after pics. Judg is really close though - such an inspiration. And reading your journal just gave me a boost too. It helps to hear of others who have to count the grams and calories too. I hate having to do that - but that is just where I am at. It's either that or stay the same...
              Start weight: 225.5 lbs Feb 14th 2012. Height: 5'7"
              Primal low: 186 lbs
              Current weight: 221.4 lbs
              Goal weight: 140 lbs

              "You are free to choose, BUT you are not free from the consequences of your choices."

              Comment


              • Originally posted by tomi View Post
                Now........ can you research paleo/bipolar please? Just kidding!
                For your BIL? One thing you can do is have him watch Terry Wahl's TEDx talk, 'Minding Your Mitochondria'. It has that great information on diet affecting brain function, that I think anyone with the desire to think clearly/good brain health can get a lot out of.

                That's all I got.

                Comment


                • Excellent suggestion! I just watched part 1 of her series on Food for Health - and she specifically mentions the benefits to people with BP disorder -- so I am SURE he will take note and watch this.

                  I have really good feelings about this and am SOOOO hopeful that he will be disciplined enough to go 100% and see what it can do for his health. He hates being on meds, and hates what the BP is doing to his health and life in general. I think if he could really see and feel the difference from eating a good healthy diet he would be able to stick to it long term.
                  1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                  2. Eat to heal
                  3. Move to live
                  4. Embrace today
                  5. Live with intention
                  6. Respect my body
                  7. Cultivate joy
                  8. Find my passion
                  9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                  Comment


                  • I don't actually do much counting or measuring. But if I'm eating well and staying the same, to lose weight, I eat less. If I'm not eating well, I eat better. I did do the calculations about how much protein I needed, so I would have a rough idea of what reasonable helpings were. I get very tired of detailed tracking very quickly, but as an occasional check-up tool, it's great. Of course, personalities are different, so whatever works.

                    My scale will sometimes weigh heavier (or lighter) just a few seconds later. I have to weigh myself several times to see what it really thinks. Some day I will get a better scale, although when you come right down to it, a couple of pounds one way or another doesn't make much difference in the long run. But it does tick me off when I weigh myself in my PJ's, like what I see, weigh myself in the buff for the "official" weight of the day, and the scale says the exact same thing! I know for a fact that those PJ's weigh 0.6 pounds, but the scale is sometimes not in a mood to acknowledge their absence. Stupid scale... LOL! Rematch tomorrow, scale!
                    5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
                    Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
                    Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again

                    More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
                    - Lewis Mumford

                    Comment


                    • Judg --- I'm laughing at the "those PJs weight 0.6 pounds" comment! I've also put my clothes on my food scales to see just exactly what they weigh. Too bad bathroom scales aren't as sensative and accurate as kitchen scales. I would love to have a better scale - but this one will do - cuz like you said, in the long run, a couple pounds either side of the target weight isn't going to matter.

                      Sleep report: After struggling with my hubby's roaring snoring for so many years - I do believe we have found the answer His new mouth peice designed for snoring and mild sleep apnea worked like a charm last night! I slept like a baby! I felt soooo good that I hopped out of bed and walked 3 miles this morning.......... then I felt so good after work, I jumping into my walking shoes and walked another 2 miles this evening! FIVE miles in one day is an absolute miracle in my book! Healthy eating, and good sleep! Look out world!

                      Food report: My appetite and hunger level are both on the low side so I'm not eating that much. I'm trying too keep calories at least above 1000, but there have been days when I'm eating before bed just to make sure I'm getting enough nutrition. I'm on day 10 of my strict 14 and I have stayed on course! I have had one evening when I really wanted something sweet - and I opted for some almond butter.

                      I'm considering pushing this further and making it another 21 days. That will take me to New Years Eve. I have a wonderful piece of cheesecake with baked apple topping waiting for me in the freezer!!!! NOT sugar free or wheat free............. but oh so yummy! And I'm thinking we might get a bottle of rum for new years eve as well. If my weight continues to drop at a steady rate though - I might reconsider the rum --- cuz I'm liking the smaller numbers on the scale and don't want to have another week or 2 stale just for one or 2 night worth of "relaxing"

                      Our new front door is in and ready to be picked up - so I need to call tomorrow and make arrangements to have it installed. I need to get some moulding and a few other things first. I need to find a good quality knotty pine veneer - and the door needs to be finished before it can be installed. I also need to buy stain.

                      Trying to decide what to have for dinner tonight. Hubby is eating his left overs from our India food outing Saturday. My choice is Ham or Ground Beef. Veggie options are sweet potato or steamed broc, cauliflower, zucchine and carrot. Or a mix of all of them.

                      Food for the day so far: 2 eggs.

                      I'm starting to get some more things to do at work so my hours are increasing slightly. Thats a good thing. I would like to be working 15-20 hours per week for the doctor. I work about 6 hours a week for the boatshop. And that leaves me enough time for taking care of home stuff, and mom stuff. And time for me (walking and such). I'm hourly for the doctor, but I take a flat monthly pay from the boatshop.

                      My son is in the negotiating stages still.......... he offered........... they countered......... he countered again. Now he's waiting again. He's listening to my guidance which is really awesome - cuz his personality has always been "I can do it myself!" and it has always made our relationship a bit rough around the edges. He's finally seeing mom isn't so stupid afterall! I've bought and sold 3 homes in my life (not solo mind you, I was married) so I know the drill pretty well. His last counter is exactly what I suggested. Makes my mommy heart happy!
                      1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                      2. Eat to heal
                      3. Move to live
                      4. Embrace today
                      5. Live with intention
                      6. Respect my body
                      7. Cultivate joy
                      8. Find my passion
                      9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                      Comment


                      • oh dear.......... we've ALL been spammed! little busy bee!
                        1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                        2. Eat to heal
                        3. Move to live
                        4. Embrace today
                        5. Live with intention
                        6. Respect my body
                        7. Cultivate joy
                        8. Find my passion
                        9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by tomi View Post
                          oh dear.......... we've ALL been spammed! little busy bee!
                          Not me - I feel left out!
                          Female 55
                          Starting wt: 198, Goal: 135, Current with PB: 165
                          Started at a size 16 down to loose 10

                          With PB my asthma has improved, low back pain is gone, & I've got more energy

                          My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread60175.html

                          Comment


                          • Finished the day just shy of 1000 calories again. That on top of walking 5 miles today should have a positive impact on the scales. One can only hope. According the healthstatus.com I burned 500 calories walking today. So, if I'm supposed to eat 1500 calories just to maintain my weight while sitting on the couch reading a book all day........... then I should have lost some real fat today! cuz I burned 1500 not doing anything, then I burned another 500 walking, and probably another 500 just going about my day. So, I burned 2500 calories, and only ate 1000. Thats a 1500 calorie deficit. Thats got to translate into some kind of a loss when added to the past 10 days of eating healthy and eating light. maybe I will see that 179 soon!

                            food today:
                            2 eggs fried in butter
                            2 cups chopped and steamed veggies topped with 1 cup ground beef w/tomato sauce and 2 oz colby jack cheese. yummy
                            snack - almond butter

                            Tomorrow I'm making Bombay Potatoes and Lamb Koftas (spicy lamb meatballs) Should be good...............

                            right now - its time for bed!
                            Last edited by tomi; 12-05-2012, 11:53 PM.
                            1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                            2. Eat to heal
                            3. Move to live
                            4. Embrace today
                            5. Live with intention
                            6. Respect my body
                            7. Cultivate joy
                            8. Find my passion
                            9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                            Comment


                            • Hey, Tomi, hope you had a good day. Good for you, for staying the course so well this time. I hope the scales didn't disappoint you this morning. I find that sometimes they lag behind reality though. Water content, probably.

                              My scale isn't good enough to weigh the PJs on their own. I've weighed myself a number of times with and without, so I can calculate my nekkid weight without having to actually remove the darn things before I go downstairs for coffee. Only if it's a new low do I bother with the buff reading, so I can enter it into the scale's memory.

                              When they aren't cooperating, then I kind of stick my chin out and say, "Ha! I'll be extra good today too, and then you'll have no choice but to acknowledge reality! Take that you stupid scale!"

                              So glad you got a good night's sleep. Got a link for the mouthpiece?
                              5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
                              Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
                              Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again

                              More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
                              - Lewis Mumford

                              Comment


                              • Puresleep.com Works like a charm I didn't step on the scale this morning - so I have no clue. But I did step on the scale fully dressed even with my shoes on and I was 185. So, I'm guessing my jeans, shoes, top and underclothes - plus eating today - has to account for at least 4 pounds. If so - thats a happy number. If not.......... oh well. My next official weigh day is not till the 14th cuz I am changing my weigh day to friday.

                                Food today: 2 eggs fried in butter
                                too much almond butter (but now the last of it is GONE, and I won't be buying more)
                                Several mugs of green tea with stevia.
                                A single serving bottle of Simply Orange.

                                Dinner will be Spicy Lamb Balls. I'm also making Bombay Potatos, but my carbs are already high enough for the day so I'm going to leave those for hubby to enjoy. If there are left overs I will have them tomorrow. I might steam some veggies so I'm not eating just lamb for dinner. Oh, actually the lamb balls have potato and onion in them, so I will be getting a bit more carbs. In that case - just the lamb balls.

                                Christmas is coming........... always a time of stress for me since I'm not quite accustomed to the girls not having control of the house. And I'm not quite sure if hubby and I are on the same page about how the season is going to unfold. Hubby hasn't put up the outside lights and he hasn't said anything about when we will go cut a tree. He is friends with a family who owns a tree farm - they let us go cut our tree every year and then pay later. Last year we were supposed to go, just the 2 of us - and he invited the girls to come along. I was not happy, but didn't show it to the girls. I'm trying to wait for him to bring the subject up............. but I'm getting stressed about it. What if he whimps out again and includes the girls - who haven't lived with us or even come to visit in over a year!!!! How do I handle it this year? Do I insist we go alone and choose our own tree this year? Or do I step aside and let him handle it the best he knows how. I want to just ask him when we are going to get the tree - and assume that we are going alone. Why should Christmas be so full of anxiety? Hubby has issues with boundaries especially boundaries with his daughters! When we first got married I would come home from work and find toys and misc items belonging to the girls in our bedroom. He couldn't understand why I didn't want them playing in our personal space. they had the entire house to play in....... they did not need to use our bedroom.

                                Scars............. still not healed from 10 years of fighting for boundaries. I'm still angry over most of it - I could write a book on what NOT to do when trying to blend two families. The first would be ALWAYS move into a neutral space - never move into the house that is currently occupied by one family - and CERTAINLY not when there was a former spouse living there. When I moved into this house it was still decorated with all the stuff that ex-wife chose not to take in the divorce. And there were still photos everywhere of his ex with the girls. I moved into the bedroom he shared with the ex and slept on the mattress that they shared. It was a nightmare!!!! Over the course of about 2 years I managed to take down all of the stuff she left, and we bought a new mattress set. But, the girls fought me at every turn. They said I was changing the entire house! Yes, I painted the walls (they needed it after not being touched for many years!!) And I took down all the ex's 1980's style decor. I mean --- how long can you live with mauve and country blue curtains, and dolls made out of rag mops hanging on the wall? oh and don't forget the straw hats with silk flowers hot glued on them! UGH! I hated that style in the 80's I certainly didn't want to live with it in 2001!!!!

                                Okay in their defense I can understand that their world was totally split in half when their mother decided to leave their dad for another man (even though she lied about all that and said she met new hubby AFTER the divorce! NOPE - she had an affair) I can understand them not wanting their "safe" environment to change - but it was wrong for their dad to let them have total control over how things would go down in our home. I've said it a hundred times --- my husband is the greatest "daddy" in all the world ........ but he's a lousy "father". He was more afraid of making them mad - then of teaching them who's boss. Well, we nearly divorced over it all --- until I insisted he see a counselor with me --- and when he finally took the counselors advice and put his foot down, oldest did just as I expected - she ran to momma's. At least he doesn't blame me - he knows he did the right thing by setting some boundaries, and he knows oldests response was immature and he's not worrying about it too much. He figures she'll work through it some day. I don't. When she gets her undies in a bundle about something she runs away and never looks back. She's lost several friendships over misunderstandings and because she was trying to control everything. And now this......... its been 16 months since last spent a night in this house - and not once has she come to visit.

                                Well.............. thats about all I should talk about that. Sorta beating a dead horse I guess. It will work out one way or the other - either she'll come around or she won't.

                                I'm going to ask hubby tonight when he wants to go cut the tree and assume we are going alone this year. I guess I'll ask him if he's going to put out the christmas lights outside too. There is no reason I should be tip toeing around the subject. If he says anything about the girls I will remind him that last year he agreed it would be the LAST year the girls picked out our tree for us.

                                Sorry for the ranting............ and thanks for reading. Its a tough situation.
                                1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                                2. Eat to heal
                                3. Move to live
                                4. Embrace today
                                5. Live with intention
                                6. Respect my body
                                7. Cultivate joy
                                8. Find my passion
                                9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                                Comment

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