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  • Because I feel inclined to answer: yeah, I lost 15 lbs over the course of a lazy, lazy 6+ months from last July to sometime late Winter or early Spring. I forget when I finally weighed in at 120. I've been dealing with candida overgrowth for basically the entire time, which I think slowed things down. I was also pretty lax in my whole primal thing for the first 5 months, then I did a Whole30 and tightened the belt, so to speak. Also, I haven't grown taller since I was 14/15, but my hips definitely sprouted sometime after college (within the last 2 years) which screwed up my pants size.

    I grew up on hand-me-downs, but I like thrifting because it's new clothes for cheap. You just have to weed through the outdated stuff. In college, I went thrifting every weekend and accumulated an absurd amount of clothes, to make up for not having many growing up, I guess. I threw out most of them when I moved home and have just been taking in what I have since I can't afford new things very often.

    Blagh, anyway. Sorry for prodding. I am interested in how people perceive things and go about their Primal journeys. I am sorry about your computer! Wish I had a screen for ya. Maybe eBay will have something affordable?
    Depression Lies

    Comment


    • Make friends with freecycle. Also, check out the free section on Kijiji. I have seen on plenty of occasions people getting rid of their computer part, etc, because they upgraded.
      Last edited by Metismomma; 07-26-2012, 01:08 PM. Reason: unneccesary comma
      Calm the f**k down.

      Comment


      • Yes sadly I am privy to your weight struggle, though you have most definitely lost more than me. I have been a size 10 since I was 17. There was one year where I was stressedorexic and couldn't eat I fit in an 8, and another where I ate 1,000 calories of vegetarian food and fit into an 8. Other than that I just fluctuate from a tighter fitting 10 to a looser fitting 10. That's all the lbs I'm losing. Maybe we are at a set point? Actually, yeah, we are. How do we change that?

        IDK what to think about goals. Don't you want to be happy & healthy? Who cares if we can't parade around like Primal Barbie? I don't know about you but I am tired of dumping my anxiety into hating myself. Lets buy into the whole, "every cell responds to your thoughts" and sending happy messages. Was any of that self hatred working anyway?

        I loves me some thrifting, though admittedly it was more fun before the hipsters pillaged thrift stores like a plague of locusts. Meats you can probably find some major scores in a city like Montreal. Go hit up some Salvation Armani. Become masterful at working what you've got.

        Have you heard about these microneedles?
        Last edited by me2; 07-26-2012, 03:41 PM.
        Notebook of a Nutrition Nerd

        ‘THE FOOD YOU EAT CAN BE THE SAFEST AND MOST POWERFUL FORM OF MEDICINE OR THE SLOWEST RELEASING POISON' - Dr Ann Wigmore.

        Comment


        • So I'm writing on my cracked laptop.

          Honestly how do I explain this to my parents? I broke one, after 5 months I broke another one.
          No wonder they think I'm a clumsy dumbass.

          The sucky thing was that I was going to spend my last 100$ on a nice dinner with a friend who was going to visit me from Toronto. But now I don't even have enough money to fix the screen (it'll cost 500$), and I'd have to buy a tiny netbook just to do my school essays.
          I have it on pretty good authority battling my parents for my mom's laptop or for the grand tv (this is how I'm writing, I have to plug it into the tv in the living room) would be useless. This september I spent my nights and days at the school library just to type up my 10,000 word essays and it was utter hell. I don't wanna do that.
          I gotta find a way to get enough just to get a small netbook.

          Anyway, I had to cancel on my friend since I won't be able to afford dinner in my own city (heh, that's sad)... It sucks doubly because my other friends are coming along, also from Toronto, and I know they won't understand why I can't afford a simple dinner (they already made the habit of asking me "Are you still on that diet?", and since I always look like I haven;t lost a pound it's usually accompanied by mock-concern) since they've got high paying jobs. I'm sure they'll think I'm avoiding them or something ;/
          But to be honest I don't feel like seeing anyone I used to know anyway. I feel like my general life has deteriorated, so hanging out with them is just excruciating to my self-esteem.

          I'm still considering doing one of those clinical studies for experimental drugs. I mean, how bad can my health get? It's already in the gutter. Worst case scenario I'll die and my problems will be solved ;D
          Or I can develop some weird serious reaction and sue them for liability... Uh, wait. Can't do that because they'll make me sign a contract.
          DAMNIT!!!!!!!!

          Anyway. Just venting, and thinking of ways of getting some money.
          I applied to a few dish-washing positions (the lowest of the low!) and even they didn't called me back ;/
          Why exactly does one need to be fully bilingual to wash dishes?

          "Passez moi les assietes, svp...!"
          -see! That's all I need!

          But either way, my course load for the upcoming year would be INSANE. There's no way I'll be able to hold a job simultaneously.

          Anyway, don't wanna think about it, it'll just upset me.

          What's funny is that exactly a year ago, while my parents were in North Carolina my macbook screen fucked up. After a semester of suffering, I finally got a cheap laptop for Christmas. It's summer again. My parents are in North Carolina... my brand new laptop tilts (not even falls!) and the screen shatters. You can't make this shit up.

          Yesterday I was laughing at my own misfortune, like a mental case. But what else can I do?

          But it was so difficult to get out of my depression in the first place and I'M NOT GOING BACK!
          God, even listening to self help tapes just made it worse (with advice like, "get the support of your friends (uh.......), partner (uh......), family (*gets yelled at*)" I just got more depressed.) I think it's because I feel like I have nowhere to escape. I used to spend money and it made me feel better for not having any friends or whatever, but now I feel trapped!
          Somehow yesterday I was just laughing, in disbelief, but still laughing.

          I mean, it's just not worth it. I think because my life is so mundane, little things like this can seem earth shattering.
          And my computer literally contains my entire life. I don't even know what I'll do without it.
          Go to the park and read?... Every day?...
          What else is there to do without money or company?

          Anyways... Venting over and out.

          Went and asked around about the prospect of getting it fixed. All said it's simply not worth it, and to get a new one.
          Then bought a steak.
          I was going to buy some veggie chips (eew) or drown my sorrow in pie but I didn't. Yay.
          Bought some red currants and dark chocolate.
          BUT alas, Laura Seacord caught my eye... I got a ball of icecream there.
          But it;s okay cause I enjoyed every bite of it on the subway.

          I have defeated my gluten cravings but not dairy. Ah, sweet sweet dairy :'<
          "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
          -Raymond Peat, PhD

          Comment


          • Originally posted by namelesswonder View Post
            Because I feel inclined to answer: yeah, I lost 15 lbs over the course of a lazy, lazy 6+ months from last July to sometime late Winter or early Spring. I forget when I finally weighed in at 120. I've been dealing with candida overgrowth for basically the entire time, which I think slowed things down. I was also pretty lax in my whole primal thing for the first 5 months, then I did a Whole30 and tightened the belt, so to speak. Also, I haven't grown taller since I was 14/15, but my hips definitely sprouted sometime after college (within the last 2 years) which screwed up my pants size.

            I grew up on hand-me-downs, but I like thrifting because it's new clothes for cheap. You just have to weed through the outdated stuff. In college, I went thrifting every weekend and accumulated an absurd amount of clothes, to make up for not having many growing up, I guess. I threw out most of them when I moved home and have just been taking in what I have since I can't afford new things very often.

            Blagh, anyway. Sorry for prodding. I am interested in how people perceive things and go about their Primal journeys. I am sorry about your computer! Wish I had a screen for ya. Maybe eBay will have something affordable?
            You seem very slim to me. Were you overweight when you were losing those 15lbs?
            I think it's very different if you just feel like you need to lose that weight, and you knowing you're overweight and not having being able to lose a single pound.

            For me, it's just knowing and looking at my small frame of 5'2 and feeling really really really "wrong". (I don't wanna use the word fat.) I just know it's not how my body should look like. I kinda feel like I'm in the wrong body. This heavy burden... Like I can't be myself, even. Like I would look at myself if I see a mirror and I wouldn't understand that it's me... just some chubby girl.
            I can't explain it. But I just feel like I don't wanna do things or be looked at, because I'm not..."me".

            At that point it's very frustrating when you end up feeling like you're meant to stay overweight (different than "not thin enough for your liking", though the latter played a part in my journey as well), but meant to be overweight! That's an ugly feeling.

            This is probably I was trying to lose weight so frantically and felt like I had to be really extreme just to lose a little.
            Trouble is, I eventually lost weight by fasting (3 times a week, for 24h and VLC, almost ZC) but the bad body image stayed...
            and each time I ate "badly" (normally more like it) I would gain A LOT OF WEIGHT back almost immediately. Hence the giving up...

            You could be right. Maybe my hips have expended. Don't think anything grew though other than my breasts.
            I'll have to see.

            Hey, prod away! My perceptions have definitely changed (if you ever read my journal prior). I think if I go back and look at my first posts (2010?) I will be looking at an entirely different person. My perceptions have changed tremendously! From neurotic to relaxed, to confused to... depressed.
            It's def nice to have those points of reference. Sometimes I just like to read my MDA journal because it's so damn funny. There were some outrageous characters who visited it! Ah, so many sexual connotations But I also get to see how I've grown.
            "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
            -Raymond Peat, PhD

            Comment


            • Originally posted by me2 View Post
              Yes sadly I am privy to your weight struggle, though you have most definitely lost more than me. I have been a size 10 since I was 17. There was one year where I was stressedorexic and couldn't eat I fit in an 8, and another where I ate 1,000 calories of vegetarian food and fit into an 8. Other than that I just fluctuate from a tighter fitting 10 to a looser fitting 10. That's all the lbs I'm losing. Maybe we are at a set point? Actually, yeah, we are. How do we change that?

              IDK what to think about goals. Don't you want to be happy & healthy? Who cares if we can't parade around like Primal Barbie? I don't know about you but I am tired of dumping my anxiety into hating myself. Lets buy into the whole, "every cell responds to your thoughts" and sending happy messages. Was any of that self hatred working anyway?

              I loves me some thrifting, though admittedly it was more fun before the hipsters pillaged thrift stores like a plague of locusts. Meats you can probably find some major scores in a city like Montreal. Go hit up some Salvation Armani. Become masterful at working what you've got.

              Have you heard about these microneedles?
              Lover,
              Yeah I considered buying one of those medieval torture devices. But rumour has it they hurt like a beach (like when sand gets in your crotch and stuff). And I'm wary. I'd get them for my mangled face (acne battle scars) but I'm afraid it'll cause more damage than goodage.
              You can always be my guinea-pig and report back with results! *evil scientist laugh*

              Btw, I keep using those toilet fragrant concoctions and I don't know if my boobs look any better (I'd have to ask a boob expert; I know they all hang out at the bars). I'm sick of smelling like a gold fish tank and not seeing results!
              I tried the x2 strengthen one for my face and I don't think it did anything. I think the scars are too deep, perhaps.

              But yeah, in response to your insightful, philosophical questions: poop.

              That's all I can think of.

              Hey, at least you found someone who loves you and sexes you in your current form! I've got no one else but myself to love myself, if you catch my drift *eyebrow wiggle*. So. basically, I have no choice but to get my shit together.

              I guess, if only we could love ourselves as much as others love us? Cause I love you unconditionally and think just your wit and sense of humour makes you hella shemxy ;]
              "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
              -Raymond Peat, PhD

              Comment


              • Originally posted by Metismomma View Post
                Make friends with freecycle. Also, check out the free section on Kijiji. I have seen on plenty of occasions people getting rid of their computer part, etc, because they upgraded.
                OR... I can marry a hot, rich guy and do all my shopping at Guess? Know anyone? ;]
                "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
                -Raymond Peat, PhD

                Comment


                • Originally posted by unsuperb View Post
                  Gurl, I get this so hard.
                  (peacing out for ten more years, but glad to see you back around to lurk on)
                  Nooo! We need more riot grrrls for moral support!
                  "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
                  -Raymond Peat, PhD

                  Comment


                  • Originally posted by NoSaladWithoutMeat View Post
                    Nooo! We need more riot grrrls for moral support!
                    There is no support on this end unless you're referring to the Spanx that's required to hold in the twenty pound weight gain I've managed over the last year :P

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by unsuperb View Post
                      There is no support on this end unless you're referring to the Spanx that's required to hold in the twenty pound weight gain I've managed over the last year :P
                      I mean cyberkinetic support ;D
                      "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
                      -Raymond Peat, PhD

                      Comment


                      • Slept for most of the day.

                        I can't do carbs. Not even the benign sweet potatoes. This sucks.

                        I also don't think I can digest meals that have both fats and carbs. Or rather fat and starches.

                        The soup made me so bloated and when I made cajun ribs (oh brother, fat dripping orgasm) and sweet potato fries, I woke up five months pregnant the next day with contractions (impregnated with digestive issues!). It could also be that the ribs were incredibly spicy and that sometimes causes my stomach to be upset (even though I ADORE spicy food) and I kept drinking water in order to keep eating the ribs.

                        Really, I'm like a sickly rat that needs carefully conditioned lab environment to eat. All these little factors can make me sick.
                        I had to take pain killers just to get through class, and I've never looked so bloated!
                        My stomach was protruding and I couldn't suck it in and had to wear a baggy dress ;(

                        So, I've devised the Steak & Chocolate diet~!
                        Join my revolution!!!

                        So far these seem to be the only things I can tolerate. Among others are berries, beef, eggs and bacon (but small amounts), and possibly pork and very few fruits like grapefruits (thanks Metsi!). But eating fruit makes me really hungry and increases cravings.
                        But so far it seems certain veggies cause problems (nightshades don't. At all. Love tomatoes. But broccoli, cauliflower, cabbage--these are lethal), chicken if cooked a certain way causes problems (I know. What the frigg.), nuts (if I eat more than a handful. One time I almost fainted from the pain after eating too many brazil nuts.)

                        So, really. Beef. That's all I can eat. I can eat beef all day, all night. Buckets of it, shoveled straight into my mouth, downing it with some melted chocolate and nothing would happen. Glorious beef. Glorious chocolate. *bows*

                        Did I mention I slept a lot? Cause I did.
                        "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
                        -Raymond Peat, PhD

                        Comment


                        • Steak and chocolate has served me well. Dooo eeet (I've found I have issues with a crap ton of foods and it makes eating awesome-limited coconut products, all vegetable mass must be cooked, fatty poultry is out, and so on)

                          Comment


                          • Steak serves me well too. I haven't really been into chocolate lately. Don't know why.
                            I have the same issue with the vegetables, they need to be cooked or I get stomach cramping, gas, all sorts of fun. Too much fat at once makes me feel sick.
                            Did I mention I haven't been taking digestive enzymes for awhile? Yeah...might be something to consider. It sucks that they cost so much for the really good ones.
                            Calm the f**k down.

                            Comment


                            • GAPS is Gut and Psychology Syndrome, basically your guts are fucked up. I wrote all about it in this thread. The neuroscientist who came up w/ it states that there are very few true food allergies, and these allergies result in a histamine reaction, like a reaction one would have to a bee sting. If you are having food intolerance and digestive issues and a tendency toward depression you likely have a GAPS gut. It is Primal, but primal is not GAPS. There are just a couple differences: eat probiotics at every meal, take specific supplements, drink bone broth at every meal,yes to honey, and a few primal foods are illegal. You also need to be 100% compliant for 10 months to 2yrs depending on how long you need to heal as you are starving out advantageous bacteria and repopulating with good bacteria and healing leaky gut.

                              It is difficult at first but now I can't imagine eating any other way. My whole immediate family is on it and so far everyone loves it and feels really happy.

                              Mwa
                              Notebook of a Nutrition Nerd

                              ‘THE FOOD YOU EAT CAN BE THE SAFEST AND MOST POWERFUL FORM OF MEDICINE OR THE SLOWEST RELEASING POISON' - Dr Ann Wigmore.

                              Comment


                              • Also i love Gangam Style!
                                Notebook of a Nutrition Nerd

                                ‘THE FOOD YOU EAT CAN BE THE SAFEST AND MOST POWERFUL FORM OF MEDICINE OR THE SLOWEST RELEASING POISON' - Dr Ann Wigmore.

                                Comment

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