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My Journey from Sugar Burner to Fat Burner - jenn26point2's Primal Journal

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  • That's what whatsherface from The Mood Cure says about the supplements: if you're forgetting you probably don't need it (as much). I hope the withdrawal goes okay for you, that can be brutal.

    You're not the first person I've heard say that anxiety is more of an issue than depression. I wonder how common that is among people who end up on SSRI's.
    Depression Lies

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    • When I was first diagnosed with depression when what I was feeling was anxiety, I pulled my medical records and went elsewhere b/c I felt like I wasn't listened too. The second doctor (my current doctor) explained to me anxiety is a symptom of depression and is often the only felt/seen symptom. She said she agreed with the first doctor's (well, actually she was a PA) diagnosis and recommended I take the drug prescribed by the PA. I did b/c I trust my current doctor. I already had reason to distrust the PA.

      So far, withdrawal has been minimal. Couple of minor brain zaps yesterday, and one this morning but nothing since. I'm supposed to see the psychiatrist on the 12th, but I think I might reschedule for later in the month. I've been missing a lot of work lately (an hour here, and hour there, 1 day here, couple hours here) and haven't worked a full 40 hour work week in weeks. I'd like to not keep this pattern going, so I might reschedule for that reason alone, but also to continue with my experiment of no drugs before seeing her again. Then that way I will know whether or not it's a good idea or not before seeing her. That way, if I'm good, I can tell her no more drugs, but if not, she needn't know anything at all and can just renew my rx. I think that's going to be the plan.
      Primal since March 5, 2012
      SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



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      • Personally I agree with the choice to postpone the appointment for all the reasons you said. I'm sure a doctor would not advise it, but you probably have a good sense of how much I care what they think
        Depression Lies

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        • Yeah for getting off the meds! those things are necessary at times, but not good for the long haul. So glad your are feeling better!
          1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
          2. Eat to heal
          3. Move to live
          4. Embrace today
          5. Live with intention
          6. Respect my body
          7. Cultivate joy
          8. Find my passion
          9. Meditate on peace in my soul

          Comment


          • Had a moment of "brain zapping" but it went away. Considering I have been medication free for 2 days, I'm calling it a win to have so few withdrawal symptoms. I had a tiny zap this morning and a tiny zap a few moments go. Nothing like the body rocking disorienting zaps I've had in the past when forgetting my medication.

            I'm done with my paper!!! YAY!! I got it all written and submitted already. I posted my 4 discussion questions to the online forum. Now I just have to write the paper for my online class and comment on two more students' discussion questions and then I'm done for the week. Well, until Monday rolls around and the new week starts. lol I'm really shocked that paper went as quickly as it did. The article I read had a lot of information in it and finally about half way through she provided information that I could actually SUMMARIZE and give an opinion on. I hate it when writers write and write and write and don't say anything.

            I also discovered that my grades from last term were submitted. I pulled an A. Rock on! My GPA is now a 3.938. If I keep it up, I'll graduate from the grad program with Summa cum Laude honors like I did with my bachelors. It doesn't mean anything in relation to job eligibility, but it sure does make me feel good to know I did so well.

            Work Friend is considering a Whole30. She's been binging lately and thinks that'll help. I wonder if it'll set her up for failure if she says "no this or no that" when she's already having binge problems. Or maybe the PB is too flexible for her and she needs the rigidity to remain on track like I did. She seems to be compulsive though (more so than me) in that she has a compulsive shopping issue, a compulsive decision making issue and a compulsively low self-esteem. Conversations with her feel more like therapy sessions sometimes. It's all good as I understand she's got some mental health issues that exceed my own. I just wonder if it's a good idea for her to jump into it so quickly since she's only been "primal" for a couple of weeks. My fear is that it'll be so restrictive she'll lose all control. Time will tell, I suppose. I addressed these issues to her (we correspond all day long via email) and will see what she has to say when she replies. She's planning to start Monday because her DB's family is having a pizza party and she's afraid of the backlash she'll receive by not joining in. They think she's 100% in the wrong to eat primally.

            *sigh* it's such a relief to have that danged paper done! I thought for sure I'd be at work late scrambling to get it done on time!
            Primal since March 5, 2012
            SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



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            • congrats on the paper, and on the GPA!
              5' 9" 47 YO F
              PB start June 2, 2012
              Pre PB SW = 180 (no scale at home, Mom's scale January - 153lbs!)
              Current deadlift 245 lbs, squat 165 lbs, bench press 135 lbs


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              • ^Ditto

                Not sure what to say on your friend. I am sure you will be supportive of her and I think that's the best you can do. If she is compulsive in other areas, I am afraid sticking to any one way of eating will be very difficult for her.
                Depression Lies

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                • Yesterday she said she was going to be patient and trust the process and if it took a year to lose the weight, she would be fine with that. Today she's impatient and doesn't want to wait forever for the weight loss. I reminded her that her body has to heal before it'll drop the pounds and that she needs to be patient and trust the process. She's very flighty.

                  her thing right now is that she doesn't want to go spend a bunch of money on new clothes, but the ones she's wearing now are tight and uncomfortable. I told her to go to Goodwill or someplace similar and get some inexpensive stuff to wear until her body makes the transition. She probably won't like that, but being a compulsive shopper, this should satisfy a need. lol

                  Just got an email from her. Says she'll go shopping and see if Goodwill has any good dress pants for work. I also suggested maybe a week or two of VLC to activate ketosis to transition into fat burning. She eats a lot of fruit so I'm pretty sure she's still energizing her body through glycolosis.
                  Primal since March 5, 2012
                  SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



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                  • Starting to experience some minorly annoying brain zaps. They're more annoying than bothersome. Rescheduled my psych appt for July 16 to give a good full month of drug free observation before seeing her again. I still have some of my Rx left in case things start going badly for whatever reason and I have to start taking it again. Also can see primary doc if needed before then.
                    Primal since March 5, 2012
                    SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                    Comment


                    • Great job on the paper and responses!! and WOW on the GPA! That ROCKS!!!! (can a 51 year old lady say "that rocks"???) I went back to school, full-time, on campus - at the age of 36 and graduated at 40 with a GPA of 3.92 - and I was damn proud of it! I'm the first person in the history of my family, both sides, to even attend a university, so it was a personal goal and accomplishment of mine. Bachelor of Science in Psychology, with the intent to continue on into the Masters in Counseling program ---- however - ex husband wanted OUT - so I couldn't afford to continue on. But thats okay - I've done just fine with what I have.

                      As for worker friend.......... sounds a bit all over the place!!! Must be hard to keep up with where she is on her daily choices. All you can do is listen and be there for her, but I'm thinking she will likely not be successful in this since she is so compulsive and indecisive. Kuddo's to you for being her friend and supporting her!
                      1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                      2. Eat to heal
                      3. Move to live
                      4. Embrace today
                      5. Live with intention
                      6. Respect my body
                      7. Cultivate joy
                      8. Find my passion
                      9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by jenn26point2 View Post
                        Starting to experience some minorly annoying brain zaps. They're more annoying than bothersome. Rescheduled my psych appt for July 16 to give a good full month of drug free observation before seeing her again. I still have some of my Rx left in case things start going badly for whatever reason and I have to start taking it again. Also can see primary doc if needed before then.
                        May I ask what medication you are going cold turkey on? Some meds are pretty dangerous to just stop all at once.
                        1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                        2. Eat to heal
                        3. Move to live
                        4. Embrace today
                        5. Live with intention
                        6. Respect my body
                        7. Cultivate joy
                        8. Find my passion
                        9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by tomi View Post
                          May I ask what medication you are going cold turkey on? Some meds are pretty dangerous to just stop all at once.
                          Seconded.
                          Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
                          My Latest Journal

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                          • 'M not going cold turkey. A few weeks ago I reduced my dosage in half from 50 mg to 25 mg. The only way to wean further is to get a new prescription. I could cut them in half again, but that would require a pill splitter and I don't have one of them. Considering I have forgotten to take it two days in a row after compulsively taking it for so long makes me think my mind is ok now without it. And it's lexapro since you asked.

                            Work friend is bipolar so I'm used to her flightiness. She read that Primal is good for bipolar disorder by way of hormone control. She's just anxious. I try to keep her grounded and remind her that it takes time for things to happen.
                            Primal since March 5, 2012
                            SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



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                            • Oh and I think its important to note that the med is for anxiety, not depression. And mentally I feel great aside from the mildly annoying zaps. Nothing to be concerned about. I promise.
                              Primal since March 5, 2012
                              SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



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                              • Zaps got more frequent and irritating so I ended up taking a pill this morning in hopes that they'd go away. I equate it to being a heroine patient and using methodone to reduce the withdrawal symptoms. I think I'll take it every other day for a week or so, then every 2 days, then stop. The zaps make me pissy. Like mean mommy pissy. Like bitchy wife pissy. I hate zaps. They're so annoying and aggravating. They seem to shorten my fuse to a millisecond long. That resulted in a rough morning for me b/c my son drags his feet and we were running late so there was some hollering. And consequently, I forgot my vitamins this AM. I'm hoping to turn this day around and make it a good day but I have another obstacle to hurdle before I can guarantee anything. DH is racing tonight and we can't find a sitter to keep our kids so unless I want to take the kids with me, I will be skipping the races. I don't want to take the kids. Their level of activity will make it less than enjoyable for me. Paying $10 to chase my kids around and not enjoy the event I paid to see seems stupid. It's bad enough I'll be doing exactly that tomorrow night. I don't feel like doing it two nights in a row. So that means DS will likely have a fit b/c he can't go and I'll harbor some resentment b/c I'm stuck at home with a pissy kid. Maybe we'll all go to bed early tonight. I think that's a good idea.

                                And to top it off, my ribs now hurt from all this coughing. But I really don't think an antibiotic is what I need. I think some Sudafed is what I need. Mass quantities of Sudafed. My sinuses are so packed full of shit that my teeth hurt. But the gunk is still clear so I don't think there's an infection - I think they're just full. So, today, my body is physically not feeling up to par. My chest hurts and my throat burns. Hopefully I'll get past this soon. 4 weeks is long enough!

                                I woke up at 3 with a charlie horse in my calf. Not sure what that is about. I had to stand up and force my foot flat so the muscle would stop contracting. Mild soreness in the calf as a result. Nothing terrible.

                                Ugh, seriously, i feel like crap. There's nothing I'd like more than to go home and go back to bed. This cough is kicking my ass. But, I have Monday off for DD's pulmonology appointment so I should probably stay here.

                                Zaps are nearly gone. I can still induce them, but they're mild. Thank goodness.

                                5k tomorrow with SIL. Should be fun.
                                Primal since March 5, 2012
                                SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



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