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My Journey from Sugar Burner to Fat Burner - jenn26point2's Primal Journal

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  • I feel terrible today - not sick terrible, but terrible just the same. My pants are cutting me in half. I feel lethargic, unethusiastic and blah. I'm up roughly 30 lbs from where I was last summer. Seriously, thirty effing pounds. That's so depressing.

    I'm becoming more and more ready for that whole30, but less and less enthusiastic about the food repetition. I really need to find some good Whole30 recipes that are easy and quick to make, not too exotic sounding or contain too many difficult to find ingredients. I'm not at all familiar with very many spices, so that's gotta be easy for me to figure out too. Curries are out b/c Brad doesn't like spicy food. It's fine enough for me to eat "boring" food - plain grilled meats, foil packed sweet potatoes, etc, but not ok for Brad. He gets burned out quickly. (PS, I think he's going to join me - his elbow has been bothering him something fierce recently). Plus the kids... the kids are somewhat difficult to feed too - especially during a whole30.

    Sleep still sucks. I thought the magnesium would help a bit. I feel like I sleep harder, but my fitbit says otherwise. So, I think I just need a Whole30 to get things back up to snuff. It was nice though b/c neither of my kids crawled into our bed last night, so there's that, but that also shows that my kids aren't the reason I sleep so poorly... It apparent it's b/c the food choices suck ass... (I'm sure the marathon might have triggered a hormone shift, but the food choices I'm making aren't allowing for those hormones to return to normal, so at this point, the food is to blame).

    This whole Thirty-One thing is going a lot better than I had thought it would. *knock on wood* My sister was scheduled to have a party in June, but a lot of her co-workers wanted to order in May to take advantage of the May specials, so she agreed to have a book party too. So right now, her book party is already over $400 in sales... seriously this is so awesome! That's a $100 commission and I didn't have to do anything! She's still having a in-home party in June too, so she'll get double rewards that way, which is great for her.

    Re: friend who's house caught on fire... Wow. It's worse than we were initially told. The fire inspector said the house was struck by lightning about 3 pm. The lightning entered the house through the cable/internet/phone lines and the fire started b/c of an arcing line in the attic. The family wasn't home most of the evening and said they smelled charred wood at 8 pm when they returned but assumed the neighbors had had a campfire in the backyard (not unusual). At 10 they went to bed. At 1 the call was made to the police. The police tried and tried and tried to wake them by knocking and then started busting out windows and ramming the door to gain entry and start rescuing people. This woke co-worker's wife. She was behaving drunkenly, despite not drinking that night and wasn't grasping what was happening. Co-worker finally woke up. Police rescued the kids. Ambulance crew says the family nearly succumbed to carbon monoxide poisoning based on how the parents were behaving and how hard they were to wake. Kids were ok - minor smoke inhalation. I guess the attic was fully engulfed by the time the police got there. A beam in the attic broke and fell through the ceiling in the dining room which introduced a bunch of oxygen that sent the blaze crazy in the attic. The smoke detectors never went off b/c the smoke traveled in a path that didn't make it registerable (for instance, there's a smoke detector in the hallway to the basement where the parents sleep, but the smoke traveled down the opposite wall, so it didn't trigger the alarm - but they were also hardwired smoke detectors so it's possible they were fried during the electrical surge). The insurance company and a structural engineering company has deemed the house a total loss so it'll be demoed and rebuilt over the next few months. We're all so thankful that they had the guardian angel overhead who didn't give up! Another few minutes in the house without intervention and we might have been burying a co-worker and his family instead of helping them move to a rental house.
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



    Comment


    • Originally posted by Pebbles67 View Post
      Yup. I need to aim for 100% paleo
      me too.
      Primal since March 5, 2012
      SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



      Comment


      • Depending on how paleo you want to go, I've got some stupid simple recipes that will mug your face with flavour. I use a lot of wine, but also a lot of herbs and garlic and other more hard core paleo things. (Also, isn't the alcohol the offencive bit, and isn't it almost entirely cooked out?) I work for 12 hours and live in a barracks, so anything I make it totally doable by anyone and not really exotic or expensive.

        So scary about the house fire. Glad everyone is okay.

        Comment


        • Any kind of alcohol for any kind of use is a no-go on Whole30, even though it's cooked out. I already asked the powers that be.
          Primal since March 5, 2012
          SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



          Comment


          • You can do this, Jenn - just have to fine that old motivation!! Read back through your journal and see if you can grasp that mindset that had you so determined! I know you can do it!

            So thankful your friends were okay........ that sounds really scary!
            1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
            2. Eat to heal
            3. Move to live
            4. Embrace today
            5. Live with intention
            6. Respect my body
            7. Cultivate joy
            8. Find my passion
            9. Meditate on peace in my soul

            Comment


            • Maybe start your w30 right now? I decided to go w30 on the morning of May 13th after yet another binge. I just did it. I am now on Day 9 which is shocking.

              This is the most successful w30 I have ever had because I am thinking of it as a beginning to permanent change.
              The Hartwigs themselves follow w30 rules most of the time, but allow themselves to have off plan food for (very) special occasions like vacation or ones' birthday. Then they get right back on. That is how I plan to continue after June 11th.
              Primal since 9/24/2010
              "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

              Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools
              MFP username: MDAPebbles67

              Comment


              • Oy busy day. Training up on my new job. I'm gonna be BUSY!! I'm so looking forward to being busy! I learned today that I WILL get a pay increase for the 4 months that I am doing Carol's job. That was a nice surprise. The pay increase is $2,000 a year, so, $500 for that 4 month time period. Before taxes, that's only $125 more per month... not much, but meh, whatever. It's a pay increase I wasn't expecting like at all...

                And it's very likely Carol will be returning to her job after her temporary duty is completed (she is being tasked with a specific thing to do and said once it's done, it's done and there won't be more work for her to do). So, if I'm selected for the internship, I'll be taking it. Which will, over the course of two years, result in a SUBSTANTIAL pay increase. Like almost $8000 a year more than I'm getting now, increasing incrementally over the next two years. I so totally hope I get that internship. I STILL won't be paid as much as Brad, but we'll be pretty close.

                My commission with Thirty-One for the last 30 days was $334. That paid off a loan that Brad and I had been hammering on this year. We applied the tax refund, then my scanty (after taxes) bonus, and now just about half of my commission and it's now gone. I am so relieved!! So relieved... with that gone, we can put extra money on credit cards!!!

                Oh, and Brad sold his enclosed racing trailer for $1,200 more than we owe on it - which will free up money each month as well (until he replaces the stupid trailer, that is). He decided he wants an open trailer now instead of an enclosed. Easier to wash the car, less weight for the truck, blah blah blah. He has a roughly $3,000 budget for the new trailer (as opposed to the $10,000 he spent on the enclosed), so he'll have to finance about half of it, but still... that's a smaller loan, shorter term, etc, etc, etc. I'm a bit miffed that he didn't ask more for the trailer. I called the place we bought it from and they gave me a figure for what it was worth. Brad asked $1,000 less than it was worth, and then accepted an offer $200 less than that... *sigh* He says it isn't worth what the dealership said it is... I'd like to know when he became more qualified to value a trailer than the place that actually sells them and does well doing so... *shrug* whatever.

                It's always about money, isn't it??

                **

                Ok, let's switch to diet. I'm about 80% primal right now. Meals are about 80% primal. Snacks are totally not primal... ok, so maybe I'm closer to 75% primal. it sucks. I need to get closer to 100%. Especially gearing up toward the Whole30. Paula, starting now won't work in my brain... I can't just drop everything and start a Whole30 now... for starters, my kitchen is completely unprepared, as is my brain. My brain has to be in the game. I've tried to drop everything and do a whole30 without planning before and I failed miserably. So, I'll probably stick to June 1.

                I will also be increasing movement soon. I need to move. I need to. I can't put it off anymore. And since the weather is beautiful, I might as well take advantage of it.
                Primal since March 5, 2012
                SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                Comment


                • Nice work on the debts!

                  What are the snacks you keep falling back on? Can you resume lifting or running during lunch breaks?
                  Depression Lies

                  Comment


                  • Eh, it was just a thought.
                    Primal since 9/24/2010
                    "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

                    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools
                    MFP username: MDAPebbles67

                    Comment


                    • No snacks in particular, Tasha. Just a case of grabbing a candy from a dish at work when I walk by someone's desk and they have candy. Grabbing a cookie or two from MIL's cookie jar when I walk by. Grabbing a soda and/or candy bar at the gas station. It's mostly drive-by snacking.

                      Nothing pertaining to hunger or poor planning - just mindless snacking.
                      Primal since March 5, 2012
                      SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                      Comment


                      • The Snack Monster gets us all!
                        1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                        2. Eat to heal
                        3. Move to live
                        4. Embrace today
                        5. Live with intention
                        6. Respect my body
                        7. Cultivate joy
                        8. Find my passion
                        9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                        Comment


                        • Brad says he's in for doing a Whole30 in June. But I'm switching gears to thinking maybe a 21 Day Sugar Detox. Not sure which I'd rather do. Both are difficult to do.

                          21 DSD:
                          Cons:
                          No fruit
                          No grains
                          No alcohol
                          No sweet potatoes
                          No white potatoes
                          No rice
                          No cashews
                          No yogurt (has sugar)

                          Pros:
                          Dairy (full fat) allowed
                          21 Days
                          keto effect


                          Whole30:
                          Cons:
                          No dairy
                          No alcohol
                          No sugar
                          No grains
                          No white potatoes
                          No rice
                          30 days

                          Pros:
                          Fruit allowed

                          I just worry about what I'd do after that 21 days is up... I'm thinking maybe 30 days will be necessary if I do the 21DSD. But I always do the same thing after I finish one of these programs - I always fall face first into a bowl of sugar...

                          So, maybe a 21 DSD followed by a Whole30? That will give me another month to enjoy some of our favorite meals that contain dairy. I don't think dairy is so much a problem from me (outside of the mild allergy symptoms I sometimes feel) when I'm not running, and I'm not running right now.

                          I think I'm going to go the 21 DSD route. I just feel like it'll be easier to wrap my brain around right now. I could possibly follow it up with a Whole30. I will discuss it with Brad tonight and see what his thoughts are before making a definite decision on it.
                          Primal since March 5, 2012
                          SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                          Comment


                          • I want to apologize for being such a silent friend lately. My diet sucks so my mind is not in a good place for offering reassurance and support. So, I've been reading but not really commenting - maybe just hitting one or two high notes on things. Nothing like I used to do.

                            Additionally, I've been very active in getting Thirty-One off and running and having some pretty good results from the time I'm spending on it. I enjoy doing it so when I have a free moment, it's what I focus on.

                            Hopefully after I start whatever we start on the 1st, my mind will clear up and I can focus on being a friend here again.
                            Primal since March 5, 2012
                            SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                            Comment


                            • I figured that was the reason for you being so quiet lately. Been there.......... don't sweat it.
                              1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                              2. Eat to heal
                              3. Move to live
                              4. Embrace today
                              5. Live with intention
                              6. Respect my body
                              7. Cultivate joy
                              8. Find my passion
                              9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                              Comment


                              • It sucks to realize that someone you thought of as a friend is more likely just an acquaintance you spend a lot of time with... and that if it wasn't for the ties you have with said person, she wouldn't even qualify as an acquaintance, but more as a "person you know", but the whole time you lived in the illusion that you were great friends because you were blind to the truth... It's pretty heartbreaking at times to realize your 4 year old daughter is your best friend, and quite honestly your only friend, and that you do everything with her because you literally have no one else to do things with. Realizing you have no friends, just people you associate with for one thing or another but who wouldn't talk to you if they didn't have to, provides a serious crushing blow. The sad thing is that none of this was the reality until 2007 when I developed PTSD. PTSD has forever changed me and I am so not ok with it. I want to be the me I was 7 years ago - when I was fun loving, enthusiastic, open, friendly, and people liked me. Now I'm just serious all the time, hardly ever laugh, and spend my time trapped inside my own head, unable to relate to anyone, unable to make and keep friends, to create strong ties with anyone - and apparently breaking ties to those I had strong ties with prior to that time. The PTSD has forever changed me - and not for the better. The VA might cut me a check every month to "compensate" me for the damage done, but it no where NEAR makes up for the lost friendships and destroyed relationships with family I was once very close to. Fuck you PTSD. I hate you and what you have turned me into. I hate you for what you have done to my life. I hate you for the ruined friendships and for preventing me from making new ones that are meaningful and fulfilling. I hate you for making it impossible for me to connect with anyone. I hate you for making people not like me. I hate you for making me feel so lost and lonely. If it wasn't for my husband holding on so tight, I'd have absolutely no one left. I might have a lot of things to be thankful for (a home for my family, a paycheck, a family to come home to, everything we need to live a comfortable life, and my physical health) but none of it is enough if there aren't meaningful relationships to go along with it. Sorry to vent, but sometimes this whole having no friends thing really cuts deep.

                                There's no need to respond to this. I'm just venting.
                                Primal since March 5, 2012
                                SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



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