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My Journey from Sugar Burner to Fat Burner - jenn26point2's Primal Journal

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  • SIL wants to talk and I am in no way ready for that... I typically get huffy about something, work thru it myself for a few days, get over it an move on... talking to people I have grievances with doesn't usually happen bc it's usually me being overly sensitive or stupid about something and talking abiut it useless. Bc like I said, give me a few days and I'll work thru it and move on again. It sucks being a non-talker in a family of talkers...
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



    Comment


    • I am happy to hear Brad seems to be seeing things more clearly and is not blaming you for everything! That has to bring some peace to your heart in the midst of the mess. I have to ask... Do you truly deal and move on? Or do you stuff the emotions so you don't have to deal with them? Talking out your feelings allows for a release of emotions and helps others understand where you're coming from. I think you might benefit from a talk with SIL. As long as she is seeking reconciliation and not wanting to place blame.


      Sent from my iPhone using Marks Daily Apple Forum
      1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
      2. Eat to heal
      3. Move to live
      4. Embrace today
      5. Live with intention
      6. Respect my body
      7. Cultivate joy
      8. Find my passion
      9. Meditate on peace in my soul

      Comment


      • She says she's seeking understanding... and says she's got an issue she wants to talk about bc she's not good at bottling... I don't feel receptive right now so I don't know how well it's going to go...
        Primal since March 5, 2012
        SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



        Comment


        • good luck......... hoping it goes well.
          1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
          2. Eat to heal
          3. Move to live
          4. Embrace today
          5. Live with intention
          6. Respect my body
          7. Cultivate joy
          8. Find my passion
          9. Meditate on peace in my soul

          Comment


          • How did she convey she wanted to talk? Through email, text, family member?

            I would reply appropriately, but not through a third party, stating I am willing to help you gain understanding. I just need to know what, exactly, is causing your confusion.

            And, if it helps you, you can pick the format, text, email, phone etc. I know for me, when it comes to dealing with problematic people, I prefer email.

            That way I can type out my response, wait, reread it, edit accordingly, and/or run my response by a trusted disinterested ally.

            Comment


            • I prefer written discussion too, but tone is so hard to determine with text.

              She texted Brad and asked if he thought I'd be interested, then she texted me and asked if I'd be interested in talking. The answer is no, but I don't feel like I have a choice.

              I snuck a look at Brad's phone. The texts with his sister were "ask her [me] if she wants to talk, but I'm staying out of it" and the texts with his mom ended at the one she sent about me being a bad mom.

              In my defense, I don't think I'm a bad mom... an impatient and often distracted mom, yes, but bad? Not so much.

              ***

              One of our toilets is backed up... We suspect one of the kids flushed something but neither is copping to it, so we have to do some work. We've plunged and plunged and plunged and whatever it is is not budging. FIL has a pipe snake, but it's not small enough to fit through the bends on the toilet, so we have to go about it a bit differently, which will require draining and removing the toilet. Whatever it takes to avoid those plumbing fees... Brad and his dad are pretty mechanically inclined in all trades, so I know they can do the work, fix the problem and save us hundreds... it's just waiting until they have the time to do it that is the trouble. In the meantime, the door to that bathroom is locked to keep the kids from using the potty in the middle of the night and flooding the bathroom.

              Personally, *I* think Brady flushed something YEARS ago b/c that toilet has been very prone to plugging since shortly after we moved in. Normally, plunging works to free the flow... but Brady said he was in the bathroom playing with a ziploc bag (filling it with water and sealing it, etc) and that he threw the bag in the garbage. There is no ziploc bag in the garbage in there... so my assumption is that it's hanging up on whatever was originally stuffed into the toilet and causing the havoc we're experiencing now. It'll be mighty interesting to see what's in our toilet... lol My guess is a Hot Wheels car and a ziploc bag...

              ***

              Having this picture of our kids printed in 11x14 to hang in the living room. I took it Saturday night at a campground our friends were staying at. The puppy is theirs. The kids wanted to go see the river and the sun was setting and it just seemed like a good time to get the phone out and start snapping pics. Yes, this was taken with my phone - but edited on the computer. All I did was darken the pic to silhouette the kids and dog. Brad was holding the leash but the leash just looks like a branch.

              kids drake.jpg
              Primal since March 5, 2012
              SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



              Comment


              • Jen,

                I have just been reading the past few pages or so. I feel for you and have similar issues minus the hubs. I wish I had words of wisdom. I did have a question though:

                Can the kiddos ride their bike along with you as you run. That is time together and it counts in my book. It sounds like the kids want to spend time with you and you with them but you, like most moms, have the running of there household to do. Can the hubs pick up a meal a week so you can play and enjoy the kids as well? I do not have all the answers and maybe this has been discussed.

                You have come so far and accomplished so much, a marathon? Holy crap!!
                Karin


                Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

                What am I doing? Depends on the day.

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                • That's a beautiful picture, Jenn!

                  As for the toilet....... ICK! I hope you can get it cleared and not have to spend any money on it. Kids seem to love to flush things.
                  1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                  2. Eat to heal
                  3. Move to live
                  4. Embrace today
                  5. Live with intention
                  6. Respect my body
                  7. Cultivate joy
                  8. Find my passion
                  9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                  Comment


                  • When Hulky and I were living at his parents' house, Hulky's sister's kids put a Duplo block down the toilet . The plumber left a mess in the bathroom! I was unfortunately the only one home and didn't know he was supposed to clean up after himself, so I did some of the cleaning (only bathroom and I had to pee).
                    Depression Lies

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                    • Brad got it to work again using just the plunger so we're good!! Yay!!!

                      Spent all day doing travel stuff for the boss and Thirty-One stuff. So excited to order official Thirty-One office supplies!!! Hehehehehe
                      Primal since March 5, 2012
                      SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                      Comment


                      • Brad and I have been looking at campers to get an idea of what to expect to pay when we're ready to buy one (we were thinking next spring we'd buy something using our tax refund). Anyhow, he posted on a campers for sale facebook page that we're looking for a 5th wheel with bunk beds and have a 4wheeler we'd be willing to use as a partial trade. Brad's uncle got a hold of him last night and said he's got a 5th wheel without bunk beds that he'd sell him "cheap"... our interest was piqued b/c well, he's Brad's uncle. It's been sitting in storage for 2 years unused so he's willing to off-load it. When Brad asked what "cheap" meant to him (b/c this guy is loaded and we could see $10,000 being consider "cheap" to him) he replied with "around $2,000"... whoa... ok... so we ask the year thinking it's super old for that little money. Nope, 2005... and it's a 30 footer... so... we may be getting a camper a bit sooner than planned! Brad's going to go look at it in a little bit to check it out - make sure the mice haven't taken over. Knowing who it belongs to, we're not suspicious of it's condition or value. His aunt has a meticulously clean house and his uncle is loaded to the gills so we're sure it's a nice looking trailer.

                        And then, as a result of his post, Brad has gotten a few hits on the 4 wheeler. He's asking roughly 1800 for the 4 wheeler, but if someone walked up with $1000 or $1500 cash money, he'd let it go. So, that's the plan. He's headed to the courthouse to get the title squared away so we can sell it without any issues. On the way to the courthouse, he's going to check out the camper and talk to Kathy at the bank about getting a short term loan.

                        If all works out, I could own a 2005 30 foot camper by the end of the day.
                        Primal since March 5, 2012
                        SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                        Comment


                        • Camper was a bust... Brad said the door was wide open when he got out to the farm and it looks like it was being heavily resided in by rats and mice... so, back to just looking...
                          Primal since March 5, 2012
                          SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                          Comment


                          • bummer......... too bad they let a nice camper get ruined like that. I guess that explains the asking price.
                            1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                            2. Eat to heal
                            3. Move to live
                            4. Embrace today
                            5. Live with intention
                            6. Respect my body
                            7. Cultivate joy
                            8. Find my passion
                            9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                            Comment


                            • Well, it's not a 2005 either... it's a 1991... now sure where Mike got the idea that it was a 2005...

                              We found one that is perfect for our wish list - bunk beds with a 5th wheel hitch (that's all we're asking - and the bunk beds are kind of optional, 5th wheel is a must) for less than $8k, but we're going to wait. It's a 1998 and the pictures make it look great. I like the layout a lot, and the color (why do they do such crazy colors in campers?? Why can't they do just straight up solid colors? Why the patterns everywhere??). The price is decent too... payments would be below our ballpark... BUT, I'd like to wait a bit longer. We're already tighter than we want to be financially and adding a payment on a camper right now would make it worse. We have a loan that is very close to being paid off (less than $3,000 owed) that will release a large chunk of money each month - if we just wait a bit. Thirty-One should help free that money sooner. Selling the 4 wheeler will too. Brad is talking about selling the 4 wheeler and applying that money to the loan, which will take it to less than $1,000 owed - which I can easily pick up with Thirty-One money... with any luck, we can buy it in June or July... but not right now. I want that loan gone. And if the camper isn't still available when we're able to buy, we'll just find another one. This one is a 1998, so chances are, it'll still be there.

                              (however, it IS perfect for our needs - sleeps 8 by way of two bunk beds, a foldable table, couch and master loft - we'd be able to all sleep without rearranging furniture or anything like that with the bunk beds in there. It's actually a perfect find for us, so I'm hoping it's still here in a couple of months when we're ready to buy).
                              Primal since March 5, 2012
                              SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



                              Comment


                              • from a seasoned RVer........... let me caution you with the old saying "BUYER BEWARE" when looking at used RVs. Try to buy one with a seamless roof. A friend of ours who works on them says "there are 2 kinds of RVs...... the ones that are leaking, and the ones that are going to leak". If you find one you want - take it to someone to have it looked at before you buy it. Make sure the toilet holding tank has been well maintained and cleaned. Turn on all the electrical and gas stuff to make sure it works. Check the axels and brakes. Check the walls beneath every window, check for discoloration and wrinkles in the wall board, or bowing. If there is an AC unit - check the filters and make sure it doesn't leak. Ask if the unit was winterized and how it was stored. Look under the mattresses for bugs and behind the window coverings for spiders. Check the plumbing inside and underneath. Check all the caulking around the windows and doors.

                                You don't want to have to pay for repairs........ they don't come cheap!

                                Also - you might check with your insurance company to see what it will cost to insure it. Or if its even required.

                                that my 2 cents!
                                1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
                                2. Eat to heal
                                3. Move to live
                                4. Embrace today
                                5. Live with intention
                                6. Respect my body
                                7. Cultivate joy
                                8. Find my passion
                                9. Meditate on peace in my soul

                                Comment

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