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  • Edited per request.


    I have never been called an "arrogant pretentious bitch" before. It's certainly an experience.

    Many of us do care about that poster's feelings, myself included. I imagined that he was very hurt, and I was sorry for the pain he felt.

    I try to only say in the journals, what I would I say to someone in person. Everyone gives their own side of the story, that is to be expected. And we support our friends, that is to be expected as well.

    I would never take pride in hurting someone.
    Last edited by Sabine; 01-24-2015, 07:25 AM.

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    • Show, then aid - Sabine

      I have to say that in reading his response to you (and others, me included I am sure) I felt like he was way off base. Way off. There may have been times that we suggested therapy and times it was suggested that leaving the marriage might be in their best interest, though honestly I personally generally believe that most marriages are able to be saved. One thing I do know is that I would never advocate for an affair and I believe that you feel the same.

      My thought is that he is in pain and needs to blame someone because admitting that he could have been partly to blame would be more than he could handle right now.

      There is no doubt that at any given point in time anyone would be telling the story colored with their own perspective. But at least for me I can honestly say that had anyone I care about said she was seriously considering an affair I would have advised strongly against it.

      I will also say unequivocally that you are not a thoughtless arrogant Bitch and that his characterization of you is absolutely incorrect and totally unfair. I am so sorry because I know that you do take it to heart and it is horribly off base.

      P.S. Spot on BG!
      Last edited by demuralist; 01-24-2015, 08:09 AM. Reason: by request
      Chris
      "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It is about learning to dance in the rain."
      Unknown

      My journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread36279.html

      My "Program": doing my version of a 4:3 - 3 day fast diet with real food every day, with a little twist of anti-inflammatory mixed in.

      Comment


      • Originally posted by demuralist View Post
        I will also say unequivocally that you are not a thoughtless arrogant Bitch and that his characterization of you is absolutely incorrect and totally unfair. I am so sorry because I know that you do take it to heart and it is horribly off base.

        P.S. Spot on BG!
        So true. You are a darling, Sabine, and don't you forget it.

        Comment


        • Sabine, I have never read anything from you that could justify you being called what you were. You are a kind, caring, sensitive, person. Your posts reflect that character.

          I also think coming to your journal to address a post in another journal was inappropriate. The manner in which he voiced his position is inexcusable.

          I feel very sad for both Paula and her husband. I truly hope they both dig deep, look at themselves, own their own stuff, and become better, stronger people who are able to build a strong, healthy relationship.

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          • I agree.
            1. Love ME no matter what noises are screaming at me, or who is trying to tear me down.
            2. Eat to heal
            3. Move to live
            4. Embrace today
            5. Live with intention
            6. Respect my body
            7. Cultivate joy
            8. Find my passion
            9. Meditate on peace in my soul

            Comment


            • I was flabbergasted. Absolutely gasted. I think what he said to you (and the rest of us in some regard) was somewhat deserved - we did stick our noses where they didn't belong, but only after we were invited in by her, however I think the word choice was very inappropriate. It's obvious he's hurting - he'd have to be hurting after what he's been through, and he's mad - justifiably so... I think he's attacking the wrong people though.

              I'm sorry he directed his anger at you (us) in such a way. I hope your friendship with her does not suffer as a result.

              As far as bringing the discussion back here - I think it's fully justified. This is your space to talk about your feelings, your struggles and your triumphs - whatever's tickling your brain. Do so freely, my friend.
              Last edited by jenn26point2; 01-24-2015, 01:55 PM.
              Primal since March 5, 2012
              SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



              Comment


              • Originally posted by jenn26point2 View Post
                As far as bringing the discussion back here - I think it's fully justified. This is your space to talk about your feelings, your struggles and your triumphs - whatever's tickling your brain. Do so freely, my friend.
                Jenn, I wasn't referring to Sabine's post on this issue. I was referring to the post Mr. Pebbles made here.

                Comment


                • Originally posted by marcadav View Post
                  Jenn, I wasn't referring to Sabine's post on this issue. I was referring to the post Mr. Pebbles made here.
                  Did he delete it? I don't seem to find any other post from her husband ( apart from the one on her journal).

                  Comment


                  • Keeping my wedding dress was a no brainer. The color (emerald green), the cool plush velvet, the shape, the memories, and the fact that it serves as my FANCY clothing all served to make sure it stays.
                    In regards to the Mr pebbles bit, I think/ hope it was written more toward whatever hurt him, with Sabine as a scapegoat. I think most of us were trying to help, not hurt, but occasionally spoke too quickly or from a place of our own past/ emotions as opposed to directly and rationally about P's situation.
                    Last edited by naiadknight; 01-19-2015, 11:10 PM.
                    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
                    My Latest Journal

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                    • Wow...

                      Sabine, you did not deserve that. ❤

                      So many people have been put in an impossible position now. I hope things that are necessary for healing will be said to all who were privy to the public journal.
                      Paleo Diet: 8-25-13 Wt: 185 BF% 27
                      Primal Diet (Lower Fat/Carb): 9-27, Wt: 176.4
                      Potato Hack Diet (Rotation): 11-12, Wt: 171.2
                      Primal Diet (LF/C): 1-23-14, Wt: 159.6
                      1-30-2014 - 157 (lowest weight since 2004)
                      GAPS/SCD 12-29-2014
                      CW: 164 GW: 130-135 CBF%: 24.38
                      49 - 5'7.5"
                      Macros (PFC) 30/40/30

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                      • Originally posted by marcadav View Post
                        Jenn, I wasn't referring to Sabine's post on this issue. I was referring to the post Mr. Pebbles made here.
                        I missed that one, I guess... I imagine it wasn't very nice.
                        Primal since March 5, 2012
                        SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



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                        • Thank you all for your comments here.

                          For those coming late to the journal, there was a post between #447 and #448, which was deleted last night. If you didn't know that, I can see that you would be confused.
                          (Edited per request)

                          I said something to the poster in another journal(as part of a longer comment to her) which he took exception to. I quoted it here, so people could see what he was talking about, as I felt that people who hadn't read what I said, should see the context in regards to my response. Now his post is gone, so it may be somewhat confusing.

                          Taking my own advice, I have thought about what he said, and I said.

                          I stand by it. I put thought into it before I wrote it. We are none of us our wort act or our best. Perhaps this was one of my worse acts, but I don't feel that way(obviously). To be silent, when you think that what you say may be of help or value, is neglect.

                          To me, the terms 'ass' and 'jerk' are mild. I will say, 'Oh, that was an ass move, Sabine' or 'I'm such a jerk' when I do something I feel is not up to my standard. The connotations of it may be different to other people, and if the poster viewed it as an insult, for THAT I am sorry. I don't want to insult people. In that same section, I had also talked about what a sweetie he had been, so I felt the context of, just normal range of human behavior was clear. Perhaps not.

                          I will probably be thinking about this for several more days. If I reach my ideals, I will take something good out of it. If not, well, that's in the normal range of human behavior, too.


                          On a lighter note(because I certainly need a lighter note right now!): we harvested some wonderful carrots form the garden yesterday. One of them was a conjoined triplet. And we finally got our car back from the shop yesterday. Our loaner was a nice car(a Jeep) but just not OUR car. So glad to have her back.


                          *I will be posting part of this in the original journal, for the poster to see, if he does not come here.
                          Last edited by Sabine; 01-24-2015, 07:28 AM.

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                          • I hope that this situation will not make people forget that we have been friends. My husband is not an ogre and neither am I. These things are not mutually exclusive.

                            I have responded further in my journal if anyone is interested. My husband's post is also there. I begged him to delete the one here. He did so out of respect for me.
                            Primal since 9/24/2010
                            "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

                            Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools
                            MFP username: MDAPebbles67

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                            • In regards to NK's wedding dress.... I would have kept it too. I am imaging it as the dress Rosemary Clooney wore in White Christmas during the 'engagement party' scene. Mostly because I have always wanted that dress. Mine is still in my closet as well. It is a lovely pale peach, silk crepe, ballerina length, very full skirted dress, with a large portrait collar. I had always planned to have it dyed black to wear as a cocktail dress but never got to it. Of course now it wouldn't fit but it still gives me joy so it stays.
                              Chris
                              "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It is about learning to dance in the rain."
                              Unknown

                              My journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread36279.html

                              My "Program": doing my version of a 4:3 - 3 day fast diet with real food every day, with a little twist of anti-inflammatory mixed in.

                              Comment


                              • Honey asked if dinner could be 'extra delicious' tonight. (I think it was a long, boring Down day for him yesterday.)

                                I had already planned for dilled carrots, using our garden harvest. Looking in the freezer, I am considering honey-mustard bacon-wrapped chicken tenders, and roasted cabbage. I'd like to have one more thing. Any suggestions?

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