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Gravyboat's Log, Stardate 59575.1

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  • 199 the day after the carb-up, which is surprising to me. Went to bed last night so intestinally bloated I felt like I was gonna pop. Today my body is emitting weapons-grade gas. Not cool. I have choir today.

    It's 44 degrees and raining today. But I have to go to the grocery store (which involves walking a long way with groceries). Not too happy about that, but I can wear one of my comically-large coats. Exercise after a carb day is a really good idea, anyway.

    I did something today that I'm not proud of. In an attempt to make my cat eat, I gave her shit-quality wet food (Fancy Feast), which contains wheat gluten. She did eat it, which is good, but also bad. She REALLY needs to eat, but I just feel terrible giving her wheat gluten when I know how awful it makes me feel, and it couldn't be any better for her. I have another can and a half, but I think I'm going to just throw it out. I hope they have something better-quality at the other grocery store today, because I can't just keep giving her baby food. It is not nutritionally complete, and I fear she may have some serious deficiencies since she eats so little.

    Looking back through the feeding log I've been keeping just for a few days, it looks even worse than I thought. Every meal is "Octavia barely ate anything," "wouldn't eat," "ran away," "only ate a tiny amount after being coaxed," etc.. She didn't eat anything for dinner at all last night and then didn't wake me up this morning either (like I was sure she would). She was just lying curled up by herself in the living room and seemed sluggish when I woke her. I picked her up and she felt extremely thin and light. I weighed her and it said 9.5lbs, but she just feels so tiny.. So I fed her more baby food and the gluten wet food, and she ate it. But at the same time, I'm like "I CAN'T BELIEVE I GAVE HER GLUTEN. NOW SHE'S GOING TO FEEL EVEN WORSE!"

    For the next couple days, it's going to be a full-out crusade to feed her as much as possible. Decent-quality, meat-based food. I'm not giving either of them any more dry, because I'm still not convinced that her nausea isn't allergy related. I do not remember her having these issues before I put them on that brand of dry. Genevieve is fully transitioned to raw now. She'll eat meat chunks, warm or cold, with no dry in it. We haven't tried bone or organs yet, which is the next step, but I'm very proud of her! Octavia, unfortunately, is going to be taking a different path. A path that involves pumping her full of as much water and as many calories as possible.

    If I had one wish right now, it would be to have enough money that I could afford to drive my cats to the vet (in my own car, without inconveniencing others) without worrying if I can even afford it. I'm extremely grateful that my parents are giving me some money for my birthday next month, because I should be able to put some of it aside to take her to the vet. I just hope she can wait until next month..

    _-J o u r n a l_--------- ---- ---- --- --- -- -- -

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    • Hey Gravy. It is very dangerous when cats refuse to eat. They can go downhill fast. How is her water intake? I have had two cats with kidney disease. Lack of food/water intake and weight loss are big signs. I actually saved my mother's cat's life by feeding her 1/2 a can of Fancy Feast every day. She started eating and drinking again and I was able to stop giving her sub cutaneous fluids. I would stop worrying about the gluten for now. Good Luck to you and Octavia.
      Primal since 9/24/2010
      "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

      Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools
      MFP username: MDAPebbles67

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      • I don't believe this.. I went out with the ladies from choir for some tea and I left my credit card at the restaurant. :| It's like a 4 mile round trip, and it's cold and raining today. Bleurgh.. I'll go get it tomorrow. It's supposed to be nicer then.

        _-J o u r n a l_--------- ---- ---- --- --- -- -- -

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        • Oh no! What a pain.

          I am really grateful to have the privilege of a car. I used to have to do everything on transit and remember how frustrating it could be to deal with things like grocery shopping because I couldn't buy larger quantities to save money unless I took a cab home (defeating the purpose) or found a friend who could drive me. Everything took so much more planning--it's much simpler to be spontaneous when you don't have to think about what time the bus stops running or whether you can make a tight transfer time.

          I hope Octavia gets better soon. I know your kitties mean a lot to you--they're lucky to have a person who cares so much.
          “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

          Owly's Journal

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          • Originally posted by Owly View Post
            Oh no! What a pain.

            I am really grateful to have the privilege of a car. I used to have to do everything on transit and remember how frustrating it could be to deal with things like grocery shopping because I couldn't buy larger quantities to save money unless I took a cab home (defeating the purpose) or found a friend who could drive me. Everything took so much more planning--it's much simpler to be spontaneous when you don't have to think about what time the bus stops running or whether you can make a tight transfer time.
            Exactly. My local friend talks about her car like it's this big burden, and I just want to slap her. Especially with my issues, re: wanting desperately to be independent and self-reliant because it is hard on my self-esteem to need help all the time, and feeling so much guilt for having to inconvenience others. But right now I often HAVE TO inconvenience others just to get by, and it rips me up completely every time.

            _-J o u r n a l_--------- ---- ---- --- --- -- -- -

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            • Good news: Octavia's appetite came back the second I opened up a jar of peanut butter. This cat is so weird, I swear. I went to the store today and bought the smallest jar they had, just for her. Dinner time rolls around, so I open it up. She whips her head around and stares at me with these big huge eyes because, oh, she KNOWS the sound of the peanut butter jar. It could probably wake her out of a dead sleep. She LOVES peanut butter. So I give her the tiniest little bit of it on my finger, then walk into the kitchen. She actually runs after me and starts mewing hungrily at my feet. No shit!!! So I gave her her meal of chicken baby food and Fancy Feast, and she ate nearly all of it! It was probably 3 oz overall, so that's not bad!!

              I just can't believe that my cat's favorite food in the world is peanut butter, though. Seriously? She turns up her nose at tuna, but starts drooling for peanut butter? Seriously?

              Bad news: A new lady was at choir today for the first time because she has been at home recovering from cancer. That's not the bad news. The bad news is that she's absolutely beautiful and super sweet and nice and I have a total crush on her. And she's straight.

              Yes, I know. I know! I'm fucking cursed. I'm doing my best to let this one go. The last thing I need is another lady-rejection, and I really really do not want to set myself up for one. Also, she apparently has a gay son, which means she has a teenage son, which means she is probably 35 at the very least.

              Damnit, though. She is totally my type, she's GORGEOUS, and it's like she went out of her way to touch me. She held my arm when we were walking, for god's sake, which is something I LOVE, even more than holding hands. And she looked into my eyes and smiled at me and touched my hand when she was leaving. Ughhhh. God damnit.

              _-J o u r n a l_--------- ---- ---- --- --- -- -- -

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              • Originally posted by Gravyboat View Post
                Good news: Yes, I know. I know! I'm fucking cursed. I'm doing my best to let this one go. The last thing I need is another lady-rejection, and I really really do not want to set myself up for one. Also, she apparently has a gay son, which means she has a teenage son, which means she is probably 35 at the very least.

                Damnit, though. She is totally my type, she's GORGEOUS, and it's like she went out of her way to touch me. She held my arm when we were walking, for god's sake, which is something I LOVE, even more than holding hands. And she looked into my eyes and smiled at me and touched my hand when she was leaving. Ughhhh. God damnit.
                I'd turn for you (I'd turn for peanut butter though so YMMV). Never say never.
                I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

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                • Originally posted by badgergirl View Post
                  I'd turn for you (I'd turn for peanut butter though so YMMV). Never say never.
                  Aww, geez.

                  _-J o u r n a l_--------- ---- ---- --- --- -- -- -

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                  • Awww. I was complaining to my choir buddy through email about how I'm totally sabotaging myself with this straight girl crush, and I already have a poor enough self-image what with thinking I'm inherently repulsive to women, and how this is totally just setting myself up for a reconfirmation of that idea. Bawww, etc.

                    And her response was:
                    Dear God In Heaven, woman... don't you know how attractive you are???? If I were single and oh, 30 years younger, I'd be panting after you myself and I bet half the lesbians in the chorus feel the same damn way!!!!!!

                    As a matter of fact, I know at least one who does. So there. But I am sworn to secrecy and cannot reveal, so don't ask.
                    That is so weird... Like, embarrassing, flattering, and weird. The weirdest part is considering that someone, somewhere, actually said in words to someone else: "Omg, Gravyboat is so hot!!" and the other person said "I agree!" And they were both women.

                    I feel like I'm in the fucking Twilight Zone or something, guys.

                    _-J o u r n a l_--------- ---- ---- --- --- -- -- -

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                    • Hellooooooooo... Gravyboat, DARLING... YOU ARE HOT!

                      Beautiful...

                      Seriously.

                      You need to start to believe it!
                      Last edited by cori93437; 09-23-2012, 09:42 PM.
                      “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”
                      ~Friedrich Nietzsche
                      And that's why I'm here eating HFLC Primal/Paleo.

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                      • Yeah, I dunno.

                        _-J o u r n a l_--------- ---- ---- --- --- -- -- -

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                        • Originally posted by Gravyboat View Post
                          Yeah, I dunno.
                          I do. You're stunning. I'd be panting after you too.
                          I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

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                          • Stunning?? Come on, that's going a bit far. Just for that, I'm going to make you recoil from your monitor and scream in despair. This is from this morning, right after I woke up. (NSFW) Genevieve was cold and climbed into my lap.

                            _-J o u r n a l_--------- ---- ---- --- --- -- -- -

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                            • Originally posted by Gravyboat View Post
                              Stunning?? Come on, that's going a bit far. Just for that, I'm going to make you recoil from your monitor and scream in despair. This is from this morning, right after I woke up. (NSFW) Genevieve was cold and climbed into my lap.
                              I so would. (insert cute pussy joke here)
                              I like badgers, books and booze, more or less in that order.

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                              • I can see you won't be dissuaded! Very well, here's my <3.

                                _-J o u r n a l_--------- ---- ---- --- --- -- -- -

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