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A little bit of peace and happiness

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  • A little bit of peace and happiness

    Well this is the 3rd journal I have started here. I found paleo/primal/veggies and protein only about 2 years ago.

    I decided I was depriving myself and my family too much (and was just tired of being obsessed) and kinda went the intuitive eating way.. but all this led to was eating junk.. and then binging on junk.

    I was lean and slim and kept thinking I needed to be leaner and skinnier and honestly I went into a tail spin.

    I jumped up around 5 pounds of pure fat and I just feel like poo!

    I am not counting calories, not eating junk, and listening to when my body is actually hungry. Honestly counting cals for so many years has made me lose my ability to sense hunger.

    I weigh everyday to keep in check, but that's it.

    2/20/12 - 123 Pounds

    I have been around 120 pounds..but aunt flo will be starting over the next few days and I had my epiphany binge last night after I figured out that all the junk, even if I was only eating until satisfied, makes you crave more junk.

    Headed to study and then to school.
    Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

  • #2
    2/21/12 - 120 Pounds

    Water weight back off.

    Yesterday was my first day back without grains and diet drinks... My day kinda looked like this (I can put away some food..just a warning..lol)

    milk w/ coffee
    workout
    salad w/ feta and lots of other stuff..I forget what was all on it
    green beans w/ tomato salad and cheese and protein
    dark choc w/ milk w/ coffee
    more salad..the rest of the green beans..feta and some more protein
    greek yogurt/banana and some powdered dark choc

    had one more cup of coffee w/ half and half some where in there..

    Today so far:
    half/half w/ coffee
    greek yogurt/banana/powdered choc
    Workout
    bean soup w/ 2 little light cheeses

    I feel much better already.. I am really trying to feel out for my hunger.. wait for the belly rumble and stop when I am satisfied.. I did pretty good except for one time yesterday where I went a little over..
    Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

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    • #3
      2/23/12 118.4

      Had a little bit of a whoosh this morning. I think all the veggies made me drop water weight. I have been eating at satiation so I can't imagine I am losing a bunch of weight.

      Yesterday I ate 6 small meals.. I have been trying to get it down to 4 or 5.. even though the meals aren't huge I don't like that I am hungry that often.

      I don't remember what all I ate yesterday..lots of greek yogurt..blueberries..salad..and so on...

      So far today:

      Greek Yog/Blue Berries/1/2 banana w/ cappacino for breakfast

      Workout-- 1 hour of weights w/ cardio bursts mixed in -- Yesterday was a rest day

      Same thing after workout but I added some slivered almonds

      Just had 1/2 bottle of something called Synergy..it is a probiotic blend and it is delicious.. a little bit of fruit juice.. but no added sugars and it is naturally carbonated...yummy!!

      A few days ago I deleted my excel sheet where I kept up with everything I put in my mouth for 2 YEARS!! Ugh..sorry I don't care to lose any more weight if it means going back to neurotic land..

      My strategy right now is to

      1. Not keep count of anything except for the number of times I eat -- 5 or 6
      2. Not let non primal foods in the house so my babies eat just as well as I do
      3. Go out to eat on the weekends and enjoy some cheesecake and whatever else I am in the mood for!!
      4. NEVER NEVER EVER eat past satiation..this is really the big one for me.. I have held steady at my weight for 3 months now by just listening to my tummy.. if 2 pieces of dark choc and some coffee fill me up I STOP eating... that way no food is ever forbidden when I go out to eat.. I just have to practice moderation

      Off to work and school!!
      Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

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      • #4
        Today went well up until my 5th meal.. which was too soon after my 4th... I was feeling really beat since this is the first week of cutting out so much processed food..and came home to take a small nap.. I had baked a butternut squash and it is my favorite.. I ended up eating the WHOLE thing in two meals.. I know it doesn't have a lot of calories, but my real daily goal is not weight loss, but to not let food fill gaps.. I was tired and ate too much..because it tasted so dang good.. every other days this happens a bit.. I eat too fast and find I went slightly over satisfied.. a work in progress for sure. I am still pretty happy with the day and to be honest I don't see myself eating my 6th today.. so FULL..

        i haven't been going to out to eat because of this tendency of mine at times to take things a little too far..

        Note to self.. every few bites SET THE DANG FORK DOWN..

        I am going out to eat with the hubs and friends at my favorite Italian place this weekend and I really want to nail the eating to satiety thing....
        Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

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        • #5
          119.2

          I believe this number more than yesterdays. This is the area I have been landing at for a few months.

          1st meal: a little bowl of frozen blueberries/Greek yogurt/small banana

          2nd meal: one egg and 4 pieces of bacon and a coffee with milk

          3rd meal: dove dark choc bar and a coffee with milk

          4th meal: broccoli/cauli w/ white fish

          5th meal: a little bit of family dinner

          6th meal: a little bit of family dinner
          Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

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          • #6
            118.2

            We had dinner at an Italian place.. I honestly only liked the Italian nachos.. everything else was eh.. Johnny Carino's.. the bacon in the bowtie dish was chewy..yick..

            I ended up with only 3 meals and one snack yesterday..yay..and I can honestly say I never ate past fullness. It was a good day.. not entirely primal.. but good.
            Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

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            • #7
              New PR 5X5 Full chins on my chin up bar at home!

              Breakfast: greek yogurt/blue berries/sliced almonds/turkey pepperoni--it was a different kind than I normally get and it was disgusting--a couple of laughing cow cheeses/Coffee w/ Milk

              Snackark choc bar/coffee

              Lunch:White fish/broccoli and cauliflower/sliced almonds

              Dinner:Chicken Breast breaded in almond flour/Butternut Squash sliced like fries/Tomato Paste for ketchup/small side salad w/ honey mustard and grilled onions

              Hopefully my boys like the butternut squash.. I eat it all the time, but they don't
              Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

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              • #8
                Well I have really been struggling lately. I can't figure out how to get back on track!

                I threw out all the junk today and I am starting up full Primal tomorrow.

                I had a binge tonight and realized I have been doing this alot! Yuck..I am going to try to catch it before it gets worse.

                I found something called No S.

                It is no snacks, no sweets, no seconds except for days that end in S. This is just a way to keep the eating intervals less and allow for SOME treats..not a binge on treats.. on the weekends with the family.
                Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

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                • #9
                  3/27/12

                  122.2 This morning.

                  B: Greek Yogurt/ Blueberries/ Almonds/ 1 Egg/ 1/2 grapefruit

                  2 cups of coffee w/ half and half and one sugar in each

                  L:

                  D:
                  Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

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                  • #10
                    119.8

                    Feeling very hungry but really good about things. I got a little bit of carb flu around lunch and made sure I got plenty of carbs in during lunch and it helped

                    3/28/12

                    B: greek yogurt/raspberries/blueberries/almonds/1/2 grapefruit 2 bacon -- 2 coffees w/ half and half

                    L: pumpkin pizza -- 1/2 can pumpkin, 2 eggs, tomato paste, turkey pepperoni w/ onions, 1/2 apple with almond butter, handful of carrots, handful of cherry tomatoes -- 1/2 coffee w/ half and half

                    D: Huge salad -- turkey bacon, honey mustard, bell pepper, onions, spinach, handful of carrots, boiled egg, 1/2 apple, glass of wine
                    Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

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                    • #11
                      3/29/12

                      119.8 - I am happy at this weight. If I lose, great, if not then all my clothes fit well at this weight. I find that if I try to get myself smaller than around 120 I obsess and feel like I am starving. I weighed 110 a couple of summers ago and was around 14 percent body fat, but I was constantly thinking about food, it sucked and I don't care to ever be that messed up in the head again. Healthy and happy is what I am aiming for, a few dimples in my butt won't kill me!

                      Ate my first meal at midnight!! I do this sometimes when the hunger keeps me from sleeping -- then I just drink coffee through lunch -- doesn't stress me out because I know I will just wait until lunch.

                      B: Yogurt mix just the same as yesterday -- salami -- 1/2 grapefruit
                      Coffee w/ Half and Half

                      Coffee w/ Half and Half

                      L: Pumpkin Pizza - had to finish the can - 2 handfuls of cherry tomatoes - small cottage cheese
                      Black coffee -- I know -- this is more coffee than I usually drink - but I was eating A LOT of carbs so this is helping me survive carb flu.

                      D: Huge Salad - same up to spinach -- making sweet potato ships, 2 squares of 85 dark chocolate, glass of wine -- can't beat chocolate and wine -- this is my little piece of heaven!!


                      I hit a real wall yesterday. I felt like someone had drained everything out of me. I went to cross fit and it always takes a good deal of energy. I love it. I only do 2 days a week so I don't kill myself. I workout 4 days in a row and then 3 days off - it is the only way I can do it.

                      2 days of teaching a barbell class, 2 days of cross fit

                      I experimented with some free days the last month (before going back to primal) and I will be honest, they suck. I end up eating too much and it just breaks up my good habits for the week. Instead I am going to just indulge on really special days, like Easter and birthday parties -- a couple of sweets every couple of weeks will be a good deal less than what I was doing. I don't ever miss bread and things like that, so usually the only thing that tempts me are rich baked goods. (can you say Godiva Dark Chocolate cheesecake Ooooohhhhhhhhhh, lol)
                      Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

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                      • #12
                        3/30/12

                        119.6

                        Ate at midnight again -- DANG CARB FLU! I feel like a zombie all day and wake up starving and wide awake at night.

                        Decided to make it a fattier meal so I can make it longer between. Though I am not snacking and I won't start -- I think eating later and adding more fat to my dinner may help.

                        B:Ate Yogurt Combo w/ square 85 dark choc/almonds/blueberries -- 2 eggs -- 2 bacon.
                        Coffee w/ Half and Half -- just ran out -- I will be replacing this with whipping cream today.

                        Off too cross fit -- I am so tired -- but so addicted.
                        Never give up on anything you can't go a day without thinking about - Tony Horton

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