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Just popping in really quickly. We had a GREAT meeting. Obviously, I can't divulge anything about the boys. Everyone - 3 social workers, the therapist, and 2 attorneys (and us) all agreed that we should go forward. The next step is for the workers to take our book to the boys (PM your email and I'll send you a link if you want to look at it). Then, they will ask us questions and decide if they want to go forward. Because these boys are older, and have a great deal of say in any decisions impacting them, there's no standard process or timeline. The therapist is going to discuss us tonight and then they all have a meeting with the boys on Monday to present out book. We will go from there..........
Warning: slight political rant.
Why do important professions like social workers, teachers, paramedics, and the like get paid so little? I mean, working part time, I make more than the above working full time. The social workers in our state work as much as I used to (albeit they don't travel). And, while I hold a great deal of responsibility (millions of dollars), they are in charge of human life. Decision that matter all the time. And, while I have absolutely nothing against professional athletes or movie stars, how can we conscionably pay them millions of dollars for entertainment. Something is very wrong in my mind.
Anyway, as I said, yesterday was a good meeting. My heart really aches for these kids, and their family. But, I am comforted to know that if they do not come to live with us, they are in a really good place with really good people caring for them and a really good team at the state looking out for them. In a situation such as this, one cannot ask for a much better situation. I am glad they are in such a good place. If things do not go through, I will not worry about them and will be able to rest in peace about the situation. These kids are brave and strong. I wonder if I could persevere as well as they have?
Anyway, taking today off. Need to take some training for my teaching gig (sigh) and then I'll be spending the afternoon with my mom. I need to keep working on the house -- getting it ready for kids (because if it's not these boys, it will be some kids, at some point).
I follow Neil DeGras Tyson on twitter. He just posted yesterday, the highest paid state employee in every state. They were for the most part (thinking about 75% or more) football coaches, the rest were college presidents. I can live with the college presidents but football coaches? Tyson did come back and say that there is some other funding in some of those states that partially pays for the coaches and that it is not all necessarily taxpayer funded, but the point remains they are the highest paid?!?
I am glad the boys are in a workable situation, such that the waiting is not so hard on them.
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It is about learning to dance in the rain."
So much to do...........so very little motivation. Sigh. I suspect I will not be a very good housewife....
I'm feeling better in terms of the boys. Somehow, knowing they are okay (thriving, even) in their current situation, gives me a great deal of relief, because I won't worry about them if they decide not to come. And, knowing their conditions, helps me to understand if they don't come. Weird, I know. Of course, you know I'm not patient, so if they aren't meant to be with us, then I'm ready to look at other kiddos
The adoption process always seemed kinda weird to me, almost like an arranged marriage. If we were in a society where all marriages are arranged then it would be norm and everyone would have a shared understanding. I prefer the courtship period. The get to know each other and move on if it wasn't a fit. Our daughter was placed with us the night we met her. It was like " okay, these are your parents now". It worked out for her but not her brother. I like your outlook of it will be okay either way. It all takes time to develop a relationship and kids will be kids and hopefully not on their best behavior all the time. I'm sure the boys will want to move forward and meet you as the book really just gives them some visuals and ideas but not enough. So glad the boys are in a good foster home situation. I'm sure they will tell you so much more when you meet them
So, it is very atypical to actually meet the kiddos....but, it's likely that we will deviate from this process. The social workers met with the boys and they had lots of questions (dating, curfew, rooms, phones, etc.). One of the guys was very contemplative and quiet. Our social worker is going to meet with them individually today. We answered a lot of questions today so that she can report back. It's very likely we'll try to arrange a meeting. Our social worker will call back on Tuesday. SLOW progress, but progress none the less. What a big decision for 3 young guys to have to make...