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the purple prose of petunia pettigrew

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  • this should be your theme song, you so cool

    beautiful
    yeah you are

    Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
    lol

    Comment


    • i caved and took a muscle relaxer

      so not only did i sleep all day yesterday, i slept all night too

      i told my baby 'don't forget me cause i sleep so much'. if he does, he's in big trouble. i'll train the dogs to pee on his pillow

      the twice broken tomato plant is now thrice broken and i'm ready to just let the damn thing die. i'll get big maters at the store

      i still have relaxer in my system, breakfast was big. eggs and sausage and kiwis and cucumbers and cherry tomatoes. it was good, i feel tired. i wonder how much i'll need to drink to wash it o ut of my system

      not the food. the relaxer.

      cookie and bear escaped again this morning. cookie, because he is the reincarnation of houdini and bear because he slipped around the baby gate i decided to put up this go round. neighbors must think i am evil to them, i growl at them to come back and sound angry. when they finally finish the 'run away and pee on everything til i'm out of pee then i'll let her catch me' they get the not-angry voice that says 'what are you doing? you drive me crazy, come on let's go back in' when they let me catch them

      i did get to do my best nelson 'ha-ha' because bear can't run while pooping. he tried. and failed. bwahaha.

      and yes, i just realized that me saying they run from anger voice is bound to make someone say 'well duh! you sound angered! you're terrible!' they run because they like to pee and eat cat poop, me sounding happy and playful calling them just makes them extra tail waggly while they run away. if they think i'm angry, they'll come back about 2 minutes sooner

      that 2 minutes is 2 minutes they won't have to think about jet-zooming for the road

      there have been a few scares. it was scary.

      dumb dogs..
      beautiful
      yeah you are

      Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
      lol

      Comment




      • heart attack every time


        i generally enjoy PSAs like these. the bigger my D: face the bigger my desire to nuke the world

        i can't find others i wanted to spam everywhere.. oh well

        still on a veggies kick, less tired than i was, maybe i finally peed all the meds out
        beautiful
        yeah you are

        Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
        lol

        Comment


        • I'm still working on clearing out the evil sodium from sushi/hibachi night... the hydro made yesterday liveable, and I'll managed today med free (except for the regular handful that is daily)...
          Glad for... less tired, hoping also less squidged.

          “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”
          ~Friedrich Nietzsche
          And that's why I'm here eating HFLC Primal/Paleo.

          Comment


          • I own a 2011 VW, and I have to say, if Volkswagen wanted to discourage grooming while driving, putting a lighted mirror in the driver's side visor was maybe not the best idea. I use mine while parked to make sure my hair isn't sticking up funny or anything before I get out of the car, but other people are perhaps not quite as wise about these things.

            Do they have one for the men who drive while using their electric razors? I see dudes doing that all the time, and it seems rather imprudent to me.
            “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

            Owly's Journal

            Comment


            • may your squidge lessen as well, dear

              owwwlllyyyyy *head shake* don't you know women drivers are the cause of 99.89% of all accidents and natural disasters?
              beautiful
              yeah you are

              Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
              lol

              Comment


              • Hmm...
                No shaving yet, but I found this one informative.


                One dude PSA... but he mans up and avoids the accident!
                Last edited by cori93437; 07-02-2012, 01:19 PM.
                “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”
                ~Friedrich Nietzsche
                And that's why I'm here eating HFLC Primal/Paleo.

                Comment


                • one i watched had a guy cover the windows in an apartment and play audio of a man abusing his wife. no one went to check, no one called the cops, nothing

                  the next night he played drums really loud and he got several reactions from the neighbors

                  and ANOTHER one was about the sex trafficking in.. sweden, where ever it's legal with pot. these gorgeous women start dancing in the windows, all these people stop to watch, all these men get real interested, then a message starts playing on a giant tv screen about how most sex workers were professional dancers lured in with promise of job and fame

                  and then the happy faces deflated

                  and then i thought 'yes please, go in and ask for a handjob now'
                  beautiful
                  yeah you are

                  Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                  lol

                  Comment


                  • Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
                    one i watched had a guy cover the windows in an apartment and play audio of a man abusing his wife. no one went to check, no one called the cops, nothing

                    the next night he played drums really loud and he got several reactions from the neighbors

                    and ANOTHER one was about the sex trafficking in.. sweden, where ever it's legal with pot. these gorgeous women start dancing in the windows, all these people stop to watch, all these men get real interested, then a message starts playing on a giant tv screen about how most sex workers were professional dancers lured in with promise of job and fame

                    and then the happy faces deflated

                    and then i thought 'yes please, go in and ask for a handjob now'
                    Ahhh yeah...
                    I was limiting my search to driving PSAs.
                    That abuse/make-up PSA was good.
                    It's honestly easier to just not leave the house until that shit faded though.
                    Or have a guy who is at least smart enough to not hit the face.
                    Though I hear they make some really awesome cover foundations these days! BLERRRRRRGGGG!
                    “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”
                    ~Friedrich Nietzsche
                    And that's why I'm here eating HFLC Primal/Paleo.

                    Comment


                    • blerg indeed *nod*
                      beautiful
                      yeah you are

                      Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                      lol

                      Comment


                      • On the topic of drugs while driving, look up driving on salvia. It's very silly.
                        Depression Lies

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by cori93437 View Post
                          One dude PSA... but he mans up and avoids the accident!
                          And of course, he's not being a silly girl and putting on makeup, he's being a busy type-A business man.

                          What's sad about the abuse PSA and the window coverings is that they've done a lot of research that shows just how bad the bystander effect really is. Stuff like a man and woman in a physical altercation in public, and if onlookers think they're a couple, they don't interfere, but if they think the two are strangers, then they are more likely to step in. Because as long as the violence is domestic, it's totes cool.

                          Cori, I remember purple eyeshadow and liner being useful along with the coverup--you could make the bruise look like part of your makeup.

                          Depressing shit.

                          But I made coconut milk chocolate sauce to go on my strawberries today, and my sweetie and I had an awesome night watching the Canada Day fireworks last night, and my dog and I had a nice long walk in the sun this afternoon, and all that other stuff is a really long time ago now.
                          “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

                          Owly's Journal

                          Comment


                          • note to self;

                            BACON DIPPED IN HONEY
                            beautiful
                            yeah you are

                            Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                            lol

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
                              note to self;

                              BACON DIPPED IN HONEY
                              You are an evil temptress.
                              “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

                              Owly's Journal

                              Comment


                              • i live to serve *humble bow*
                                beautiful
                                yeah you are

                                Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                                lol

                                Comment

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