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the purple prose of petunia pettigrew

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  • #46
    i think i'd have to join a gym and not quite ready to get there, can't explain it other than i have a stupid brain
    beautiful
    yeah you are

    Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
    lol

    Comment


    • #47
      my babe sent me this, cause he loves meh

      and really, garlic bread is like the perfect food



      but we won't be eating garlic bread today, today will be sweet potatooes, green beans and rosemary i grew all by myself, and eggs scrambled with coconut milk
      beautiful
      yeah you are

      Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
      lol

      Comment


      • #48
        i'm going to tell you something

        DO NOT JOG with no sports bra if you have breasts. i let the moment take me and went for it, bystanders and laughers be damned (mostly) ... (i was nervous about bystanders)... and discovered that 1, jogging does not feel natural and 2, i do not like the way my body feels on the move like that

        i lasted 10 minutes before the unnaturalness and weird body feel got to me. walk, jog, walk jog, walk walk, jog, walk. it felt pretty okay tho, it didn't wear me out or anything, it was energizing

        having a muscly, working outty love of my life is excellent motivation to move, even though my back was sore

        i sort of feel inadequate, otherwise, and make note often that i'm not moving enough

        and then continue reading

        there's like a band over the back of my shoulder blade that tingles sometimes, like now. it bugs the s--- out of me
        Last edited by bloodorchid; 10-17-2011, 11:39 AM.
        beautiful
        yeah you are

        Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
        lol

        Comment


        • #49
          well, i was awake for almost 24 hours yesterday and slept about 20 today. i lay in bed, groggy, letting my mind roam, realizing i didn't have to pee, wondering how dehydrated i was and then gradually, like slow magic, i started getting angry. i won't go into why. it just grew to almost jaw gritting rage while i was heating up soup. and after i ate it turned to sadness, eyes tearing up, that whole stupid bit.

          and then i took note of the date. and realized this will be my pms for the week. all happy and bouncy one day, an emo roller coaster the next. golly i can't wait for what the next few days bring.

          i used to wonder if i brought pcos ( peekos, ha) on myself when i was younger. i was the default babysitter, and i was also trying really hard not to kill myself so having to take care of screamy small people was an added stress i didn't really have a choice in handling. i was 13, so stress management wasn't my forte then. i got older, i learned to shut the depressed part of me off into boxes, but i remained adamant, ADAMANT, that i did not want and would not have children. then my periods grew erratic. then disappeared. then my weight exploded. more pcos symptoms. i'm fairly certain i miscarried. i shut those emotions down hard at the time, but the feeling of being a failure remained. what kind of woman was i if i couldn't even do that?

          decisions can change with age. choosing not to have kids, and having the option taken away from you are 2 different things.

          so who knew symptoms would be reversible with the kicking out of bread? i was low fat, high carb because it was 'healthy'. my doctor at the time advised that i should just accept how things were (he's awesome, he just didn't have updated research). 'bread makes you FAT?!' from the video is spot on. and maybe, if my periods are regulating again and i'm getting pms more consistently, that means i'm ovulating. and if i'm ovulating again, maybe that means my uterus could hold onto a baby if i decided i wanted to get pregnant

          or maybe i'm crazy and imagined the whole thing

          i'm still tired, still cold-y, i may go back to bed soon and get more sleep. eating was a bad idea, the water was a good one tho.
          beautiful
          yeah you are

          Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
          lol

          Comment


          • #50
            well, remembering Bad Things was not a good idea. to quote the immortal Donkey..... i need a hug
            beautiful
            yeah you are

            Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
            lol

            Comment


            • #51
              *Hug*

              Your journal is hilarious. And about Zumba- the first class I went to the instructor flat out told us that if we were new we probably wouldn't keep up. But that was fine- since the point was to have fun anyway! And it was fun.
              http://cattaillady.com/ My blog exploring the beginning stages of learning how to homestead. With the occasional rant.

              Originally Posted by TheFastCat: Less is more more or less

              And now I have an Etsy store: CattailsandCalendula

              Comment


              • #52
                the hug and telling me my journal was funny was appreciated, thank you

                (yay! i'm funny too!)

                i was eyeballing the zumba site earlier, sort of circling it like a hyena. i'll make my mind up one of these days, dammit
                beautiful
                yeah you are

                Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                lol

                Comment


                • #53
                  Apparently hyenas are pretty impressive hunters. Just go for the kill

                  And I always stood in the back, which means that for 90% of the class (except for when we're doing turns or something) only the instructor is looking at me. And if you take a friend- at the very least it'll be good for a laugh later.
                  http://cattaillady.com/ My blog exploring the beginning stages of learning how to homestead. With the occasional rant.

                  Originally Posted by TheFastCat: Less is more more or less

                  And now I have an Etsy store: CattailsandCalendula

                  Comment


                  • #54
                    all i can think of re; hyenas hunting is the hyena eating into the butt of the dead elephant... oh gaw...

                    to look at my plate earlier one would think i cannot cook. much like bender chefing it up in the kitchen, it looked horrible and tasted only slightly better. but i ate it. because my huevos are gargantuan and i hate wasting food.

                    it was originally supposed to be eggplant rolled up with ricotta and baked in sauce, i rinsed the slices but the salt refused to let go. green beans and baby red potatoes sauteed in rosemary. burned so badly that the saying 'that's going to heaven because it got the hell burnt out of it' applies with great force

                    i have little interest in eating these days, so maybe that's why i suddenly suck. a little walking yesterday, a little more today. i don't feel quite so much like ass now so ill start leveling up on fitocracy again soon enough

                    today's awesomeness-


                    beautiful
                    yeah you are

                    Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                    lol

                    Comment


                    • #55
                      went to grandma's tonight and an aunt was cooking supper for them, deep fried hush puppies and fish. i had some out of familial duty, and i'd already had diet dr pepper earlier

                      holy lord my stomach feels gross
                      beautiful
                      yeah you are

                      Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                      lol

                      Comment


                      • #56
                        Ahaha, I know that feeling. I had some "duty" food recently, and oh man did I pay for it. I hope it passes soon and you can get on your way.

                        Also, I loved your analogy of stalking zumba like a hyena. That's how I feel about those sort of classes too. It would probably be a whole lot of fun if I could get over myself.
                        My Primal Journal

                        Comment


                        • #57
                          Group classes are the best because everyone is worried about standing out, but really you're just part of the amorphous flailing herd of sweaty humanity and nobody is looking at you! Especially if you stand in the back corner where you can't see yourself in the mirror... =D
                          Cooking Primal with Otter - Journal
                          Otter's (Defunct) Primal Log
                          "Not baked goods, Professor, baked bads!" ~ The Tick

                          Comment


                          • #58
                            2 left feet and general uncoordination. i am the amorphous flailing herd *fist up*

                            first, this-
                            ladies' home calisthenics

                            second, this -



                            my sister borrowed the bear for a week of puppy making, she 'loved him' she said, he is 'so cute', she said. she was so excited i was letting her keep him for a week to try and mate with her pom. today she brought him back. mahahahaha. he spent the time yipping at the female and sprinkling every time he got excited or nervous. he is now a 'little sh-t' and i am amused. that was her punishment for threatening to kidnap him, because he is my (partly. kind of a.) good boy

                            actually this past week has been super quiet and calm, so apparently he is the source of all the play fighting and thundering herd noises and occasional toy killing

                            walked on the trail yesterday, it's about a mile course with 2 inclines/declines. the last time i walked the full thing, including uphill/downhill, i was 30 some odd lbs heavier and it was much harder. now, it's some work but not impossible and my rest time was a minute. i looked at ducks. last time was not so nice or easyish. but i still look at pictures of fit women and can't imagine myself looking like that. i don't feel fat or gross or ew, but the world tells me i'm fat and gross and ew

                            and when i exercise, it's more for the world than me. will i be good enough now? pant, sweat, flex, arrrgh

                            this mindset is fkt up, i know this

                            a few steps down the self esteem ladder and i'd be a porn queen with daddy issues maybe. but i'd have a buttload (wow, bad word choice) of money.

                            but i would have no My Baby, whom i love dearly

                            my thighs are 24 inches. my legs hold fat strangely, so the back half of my thighs are muscle, the front half is padding. i want to shake them and say 'what are you doing??'

                            now to get the quads to match *flex flex*
                            beautiful
                            yeah you are

                            Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                            lol

                            Comment


                            • #59
                              diet soda, or the caffeine, makes me manic. prone to panic. need to buy new things to feel a short rush of happy. last month i cut way down almost to nil, replaced it with water. my brain and bank account are breathing a sigh of relief

                              a few days ago i was tired so i picked up a diet dr pepper and sipped a while. then got another. a few hours later another and i could feel my brain start winding up for panic time. sort of an oh god oh god oh god wave of fear hit me and i knew it was irrational, i knew it was the soda so i made myself not buy things to hoard around me like a protective wall

                              ridiculousness. sheer stupidity. i knew it. but it still wasn't easy.
                              beautiful
                              yeah you are

                              Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                              lol

                              Comment


                              • #60
                                Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
                                .... my brain start winding up for panic time.....
                                This reminded me of this awesome thing about a kid and cake. Except cake is a whole lot happier than panic time.

                                I'm proud of you for holding strong against the soda induced buying. That is awesome!
                                Last edited by BeckaSki; 10-24-2011, 08:59 PM. Reason: I suck at links
                                My Primal Journal

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