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the purple prose of petunia pettigrew

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  • Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
    sure, if you could live with yourself after seeing his You Broke My Tiny Trust face afterwards

    you probably could, you monster!
    I can totally live with it. When I was a Teenage Mutant Panda Cub, I used to dust the piano with my very fluffy white cat. She'd give me The Look afterwards and I'd say I FEED YOU AND CLEAN YOUR POOPS SO SUCK IT UP.

    I would also sit her in my lap and make her do the Macarena.

    Bizarrely, she liked me a lot more than Lady Friend, who never dusted or danced with her.
    JOIN THE PANDA SHOW!!! Primal With A Side Of FABULOUS and PANDALOONERY!

    Comment


    • ugh.. i'm such a pushover with these dogs. i even feel kind of bad when they give me sad eyes during baths.

      maybe i should dust with them. that'll toughen them and me up too.
      beautiful
      yeah you are

      Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
      lol

      Comment


      • Sweet thang. It's okay to be a pushover with dogs. They really are the most loyal creatures.
        "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

        B*tch-lite

        Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

        Comment


        • loyal and terrible :| bear found a frog that decided to die unnoticed among the flower pots and rubbed it into his fur. dead frogs smell like cat crap. he's been scrubbed down with strawberry shampoo but i still smell the ghost of dead frog stench :|

          while i'm trying to cook

          this is not what i want to smell around food or anywhere

          someone scrub this dog down for me
          beautiful
          yeah you are

          Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
          lol

          Comment


          • A paste of baking soda and peroxide works for skunk so maybe it will work on the ghost of dead frog stench?

            And thanks to you, I just spent a stupid amount of money on pretty stuff at Urban Decay. They owe you some commission.

            Comment


            • but i still smell the ghost of dead frog stench
              ^^This sounds like a song lyric.

              Waves hi to V - good to see you.
              "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

              B*tch-lite

              Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

              Comment


              • Originally posted by vh67 View Post
                A paste of baking soda and peroxide works for skunk so maybe it will work on the ghost of dead frog stench?

                And thanks to you, I just spent a stupid amount of money on pretty stuff at Urban Decay. They owe you some commission.
                would you like to be on paste duty for next time? i would be delighted to let you

                ecstatic even! soggy dead frogs stiiiiiiink

                and for the next time i see you, what'd you get? do you love it? are you wearing it right now?

                Originally posted by JoanieL View Post
                ^^This sounds like a song lyric.

                Waves hi to V - good to see you.
                look for me at the grand ol opry a soulful sad ballad about frogs, jack and death

                i caught a bug, so i'm sounding pretty froggy myself

                i can't sleep again. i've been devouring books in the hours of wakefulness. this is the first time my brain has let me actually read in a longass time.

                i think, currently, the worst thing in the world is blowing your nose again on a tissue after the wet spot you can't completely avoid has gotten cold.

                food could be better. there could be less salt and fewer carbohydrates. but stubbornness rears its head and i don't want to eat what i don't want to eat.

                and i messed up my second batch of cauli bread so that was a bummer, but i ate some tuna on it and kinda enjoyed it

                going out in the very early hours in pjs in 30 degree weather to keep an eye on a frustratingly smart dog is unpleasant. but i got to see a fox, so that was kinda okay.

                i'm tired. and sniffly. i should sneeze on people on purpose like a rouge vigilante. drive terribly? feel my moist, germ-laden wrath.

                beautiful
                yeah you are

                Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                lol

                Comment


                • I got this: Ammo Eyeshadow Palette by Urban Decay (Official Site)

                  And this: Full Frontal - UrbanDecayUS

                  And three shades of eyeliner that go with the shadows.

                  I am testing an eyeliner right now and I do love it!! My eyes are super sensitive at the moment so I thought I would test the liner and shadows separately. So very pretty!!

                  I like your vigilante plan. . I have a similar one that involves me puking on the feet of those whose smell offends me. Chemo has given me a very touchy sense of smell so I should use it for good. Soon the world shall be free of people with bad hygiene and icky cologne!!!

                  I will be on paste duty. You have little fun to paste up dogs. Much easier than mine.

                  Comment


                  • I wish you two could show me how to put on make-up!
                    Life is death. We all take turns. It's sacred to eat during our turn and be eaten when our turn is over. RichMahogany.

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by vh67 View Post
                      I got this: Ammo Eyeshadow Palette by Urban Decay (Official Site)

                      And this: Full Frontal - UrbanDecayUS

                      And three shades of eyeliner that go with the shadows.

                      I am testing an eyeliner right now and I do love it!! My eyes are super sensitive at the moment so I thought I would test the liner and shadows separately. So very pretty!!

                      I like your vigilante plan. . I have a similar one that involves me puking on the feet of those whose smell offends me. Chemo has given me a very touchy sense of smell so I should use it for good. Soon the world shall be free of people with bad hygiene and icky cologne!!!

                      I will be on paste duty. You have little fun to paste up dogs. Much easier than mine.
                      niiiice, colors everywhere. i saw i typed rouge instead of rogue, so, you know, i guess it works with the makeup. do some big dramatic eyes for your justice hurling on all the ne'er do wells and i'll sneeze on them after

                      i played with some brown and purple shadows last night while i was busy not sleeping and i dunno man. i dunno. do my eyes turn into caves? i can't tell. darn my facial insecurities

                      Originally posted by Urban Forager View Post
                      I wish you two could show me how to put on make-up!
                      i'll practice all the dark eye looks on you, put my glasses on you after to see how it goes! yes! i love having guinea pigs. i mean wait, no, i will totally uh.. be a teacher

                      it's been a few years since i've been sick enough to need puffs tissues but i seem to recall them being much softer in the past. i'm not sure i believe their claims of lotion and such.

                      i got my physical exams results back and such. pap was abnormal again, it was abnormal in '11 but sorted itself out so i'm going to assume it'll do the same now. and by assume i mean i'm not going to think about it.

                      blood sugar levels were a little high after several weeks of eating food that should not have made it high. i don't know what the f. but what the f.

                      i guess my lazy ass will get to track every bite

                      beautiful
                      yeah you are

                      Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                      lol

                      Comment


                      • Frogs, jack, and death is definitely Grand Ole Opry stuff.

                        That episode of SouthPark was hilarious!

                        When do you have to go back to the doc?
                        "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                        B*tch-lite

                        Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

                        Comment


                        • i went back and donated more blood yesterday, i get to go get prodded some more at the end of the month

                          maybe it'll be fun. maybe it was just a numbers glitch.
                          beautiful
                          yeah you are

                          Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                          lol

                          Comment


                          • sleep has been all over the place. i'm better than i was the other day but my body is kinda stiff. i think i could have lived with the rest of it if it hadn't been for the sore throat, those always suck.

                            i premade just enough food to be disgusted by the taste of it. most things taste weird right now so maybe i'll enjoy it soon. but there's nothing quite like that 'ahhh damn...' looking at all the food you have to eat that doesn't taste good

                            i got a bunch of chicken i don't know what to do with

                            maybe it can translate into the pork carnitas i just watched chef john on foodwishes make

                            i was going to stay up and watched another episode of forever but crap i'm tired. i should talk bay into blowing my nose for me.
                            beautiful
                            yeah you are

                            Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                            lol

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
                              i was going to stay up and watched another episode of forever but crap i'm tired. i should talk bay into blowing my nose for me.

                              Nose blowing is sign of true love!

                              Chicken is gross. Feed it to your furry little monkeys!!

                              Comment


                              • i asked him if he'd blow my nose for me, he responded 'what does that even mean? will i hold the tissue?' i responded in the affirmative and he said 'sure.'

                                i can feel the love overflowing

                                and those little monsters have their own chicken, this 'ins mine
                                beautiful
                                yeah you are

                                Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                                lol

                                Comment

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