Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

the purple prose of petunia pettigrew

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • i'm late to the true detective party, one episode left to watch and it'll be done. i'm not ready. i have a lady bone for this guy's pessimism and general outlook.



    beautiful
    yeah you are

    Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
    lol

    Comment


    • after 3 diet dr peppers during the true detective binge and pills amping up looseness and hyperness, i think i told bay i'd done 10 sets of bridges. i don't think that was the word i was looking for, exactly. i was rambling on about frustrations and what i'd been doing and how i was going to work up to weighted bridges with him sitting on me. maybe one day my cheeks will crack the quarter bounced on them.

      so to make up for the word fart, i did 10 sets of 10 butt squeezey bridges on the honor system. and i'm still kind of frustrated because i want to work out with the big kids.

      he counseled me on baby steps. but much like veruca salt, i want it now.

      it doesn't feel like i'm getting anything done.

      i've read enough self help stuff to know i should live in the moment and appreciate the gifts i have. like, i can walk and stuff. but for some reason i'm fixated on making me a butt.

      and in the late 1800s and early 1900s, what was essentially a custard base was most efficacious in treating croup. or piles? or coma? there was a lot of disease information crammed together. i bookmarked it to make and drink at some point because it sounds delicious.

      beautiful
      yeah you are

      Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
      lol

      Comment


      • We just watched finished watching True Detective this weekend. HBO is a reminder that some things are better now than they were 30 yrs ago.
        Life is death. We all take turns. It's sacred to eat during our turn and be eaten when our turn is over. RichMahogany.

        Comment


        • trying to imagine what tv would have done with true detective back in the 80s makes me cringe in ways i've never cringed before

          the last few days i've wanted to eat all the sweet food in the world. like yo, twinkie filling, what's up.

          i effed up my peanut butter cookies and cheesecake muffins. i used coconut sugar in the pb and cooked them too long so they taste too crunchy and like burnt gingerbread. it would have been nice if someone had warned me that's what coconut sugar tastes like.

          some of the cheesecake bites have toasty bottoms, and they taste weirdly salty. and.. wtf. just wtf.

          my hair, my face, my body, my clothes, everything feels uncomfortable tonight. yes even my hair.

          sitting in the bottom of the shower and pretending it's warm rain may be on my to-do list



          beautiful
          yeah you are

          Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
          lol

          Comment


          • so i went hunting through goodwill. my usual targets are antiques and weird cookbooks.

            i scored

            1960s cookbooks with gelatin salads. a 1940s ad for a washing machine hidden behind a picture in a picture frame (i wasn't opening everything like a weirdo, it was sticking out because sometimes whoever's in charge of life likes me) so that ad in the frame is now with my washer and dryer.

            it also had a family photo from 2002, i imagine one of the older women seated in front died. i left it in the frame behind the ad so i can pass on the tradition of confusing hidden pictures.

            another thing i've seen online is people buying odd little paintings from thrift stores and adding images in the backgrounds like monsters or other things that don't belong. i found an old fake painting of a chipmunk on a stump. i was quite pleased. i already have plans. i hope i don't f it up.

            i think my pain is a 6 or 7 on the scale. is the next step having my liver hanging out? i don't know. 7 seems excessive and 6 doesn't seem high enough.

            food has been up and down. appetite has been up and down. physical activity has been down. interest in the outside world has been down.

            my hands feel grimey.

            beautiful
            yeah you are

            Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
            lol

            Comment


            • Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
              so i went hunting through goodwill. my usual targets are antiques and weird cookbooks.

              i scored

              1960s cookbooks with gelatin salads. a 1940s ad for a washing machine hidden behind a picture in a picture frame (i wasn't opening everything like a weirdo, it was sticking out because sometimes whoever's in charge of life likes me) so that ad in the frame is now with my washer and dryer.

              it also had a family photo from 2002, i imagine one of the older women seated in front died. i left it in the frame behind the ad so i can pass on the tradition of confusing hidden pictures.

              another thing i've seen online is people buying odd little paintings from thrift stores and adding images in the backgrounds like monsters or other things that don't belong. i found an old fake painting of a chipmunk on a stump. i was quite pleased. i already have plans. i hope i don't f it up.

              i think my pain is a 6 or 7 on the scale. is the next step having my liver hanging out? i don't know. 7 seems excessive and 6 doesn't seem high enough.

              food has been up and down. appetite has been up and down. physical activity has been down. interest in the outside world has been down.

              my hands feel grimey.

              I guess they are used to seeing guns in public in Tn..... but when ya blow a cookbook to bits, the store workers get a bit pissy having to clean up the mess....

              Good shootin Tex.... er Tenn!

              Comment


              • there was some screaming and ducking, but a couple of guys cheered
                beautiful
                yeah you are

                Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                lol

                Comment


                • Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
                  there was some screaming and ducking, but a couple of guys cheered
                  I figured as much.... the cheering came from Duck Dynasty look-alikes, I'm sure....

                  Comment


                  • beautiful
                    yeah you are

                    Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                    lol

                    Comment


                    • I love those old ads! For awhile, I used to sell stuff online and in an antique mall, and after many false starts, I ended up making the most money selling paper. I would fill my pickup truck full of old magazines on the weekends, then spend a couple of days cutting and altering stuff. It was like occupational therapy with profit.
                      "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                      B*tch-lite

                      Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

                      Comment


                      • if only i could somehow turn reading old cookbooks into profit..

                        the ad's great, she's so happy about her washer with the hidden wringer and pedal & you can even use the space age flat washer surface as another counter top! woo! exciting

                        i tried taking some pics of short hair bear but he was too wiggly. but when i get more chicken jerky i'll have his undivided, baited breath attention. it'll be like taking a picture of a very unsettlingly focused statue that occasionally takes a few steps forward. and snort sneezes. until he loses his control and dances. that's usually a 5 second window of stillness, he has the soul of a morbidly obese child.

                        the baby formula thread makes me a little nervous. i don't know if she's talking about actual rice milk or if there's a rice milk based formula.

                        please don't feed the baby plain rice or coconut milk.

                        i didn't sleep. i don't think i really wanted to even though i was tired. so i flipped through recipes from 1980. good morning world.
                        beautiful
                        yeah you are

                        Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                        lol

                        Comment


                        • I have some catching up on sleep also. Up 'til the wee hours as they say.

                          Sometimes I get a bit burned out on the questions. The second question I ever posted here was asking for recipes for oysters because I'd bought a container and they didn't look pretty enough to eat raw. I swear that at least half the answers were, "Eat them raw."

                          Well golly gee, if I'd wanted to eat them raw, I doubt I'd need recipes ffs. LOL. But of course, I just posted a thank you for all the suggestions.

                          I had two old wringer washers when I lived in WA state. They make good planters. Someone also gifted me a huge wood burning stove that was way more than I needed in my tiny abode up there, so I turned it into an entertainment center of sorts. TV on top. VCR (remember those?) in the body of it. I love the looks of those old appliances.
                          "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                          B*tch-lite

                          Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

                          Comment


                          • Hi gals, I don't have anything to add to the conversation just wanted to let you know that I'm with ya.
                            Life is death. We all take turns. It's sacred to eat during our turn and be eaten when our turn is over. RichMahogany.

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by JoanieL View Post
                              I have some catching up on sleep also. Up 'til the wee hours as they say.

                              Sometimes I get a bit burned out on the questions. The second question I ever posted here was asking for recipes for oysters because I'd bought a container and they didn't look pretty enough to eat raw. I swear that at least half the answers were, "Eat them raw."

                              Well golly gee, if I'd wanted to eat them raw, I doubt I'd need recipes ffs. LOL. But of course, I just posted a thank you for all the suggestions.

                              I had two old wringer washers when I lived in WA state. They make good planters. Someone also gifted me a huge wood burning stove that was way more than I needed in my tiny abode up there, so I turned it into an entertainment center of sorts. TV on top. VCR (remember those?) in the body of it. I love the looks of those old appliances.
                              yeah i've noticed that sometimes people get blinders-vision when 'what do i do with this?' gets asked. 'what do i do with these oysters?' eat em. 'my girlfriend won't eat meat what do i feed her?' meat.

                              or penis?

                              they still make vcrs! mom got me a new dvd/vcr combo player for my birthday after my old remote rusted out. i'm almost afraid to try it, what if my old vhses collapse in puffs of dust when i hit play?

                              what if movies i loved as a kid will suck ass now that i'm grown?

                              i got burned by the last unicorn. i didn't remember it being so weird when i was little.

                              Originally posted by Urban Forager View Post
                              Hi gals, I don't have anything to add to the conversation just wanted to let you know that I'm with ya.
                              helloooo

                              there was a couple hours sleep yesterday. there was none again last night. so i watched youtube til i got up to let the animals out, grumbling because i had to follow because cookie found another way out which means i have to buy another new pen piece but it won't do any good because he is bound and determined to get eaten by coyotes or stolen and sold into breeding slavery by strangers.

                              i am somewhat scowly. my interactions with others will probably lean on scowly. someone asked if they should eat a pint of factory chicken stock or toss it out, i made a dumb looking reply because what i really wanted to say was that the poor things had a shitty life and then they had a shitty death, don't waste it.

                              and i've wasted plenty of food of my own. i guess i'm just looking for an excuse to be pissy this morning.

                              no. i'm gonna go edit that. it just sounds dumb.

                              okay that's kinda better

                              i finally made butter of the cream i bought. i get this weird mental block sometimes thinking things are more difficult than they are and not wanting to mess it up. but watching people do things is how i learn so i watched some people make butter. the last time i made it was a few years ago and there were several more steps involved, then i got out of the habit. i don't know. dumb. but the butter then was from store bought cream and that butter was a lovely, pristine white

                              THIS butter.. is a super cool yellow, lookit all them vituhmins

                              it wound up being 2 cups, give or take. the dogs like it, i like it. price and volume, it's about what i was spending on organic. plus i enjoy shaking jars of butter clumps.

                              my entire upper back burns. what astoundingly harsh amount of physical labor did i do for this to happen?

                              i stretched.



                              beautiful
                              yeah you are

                              Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                              lol

                              Comment


                              • nothing of import happened this weekend, i just feel like ass



                                beautiful
                                yeah you are

                                Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                                lol

                                Comment

                                Working...
                                X