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the purple prose of petunia pettigrew

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  • have the best visit with Bay, BO.
    "never let the truth get in the way of a good story "

    ...small steps....

    Comment


    • thanks
      beautiful
      yeah you are

      Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
      lol

      Comment


      • i think i've found my everyday look



        nice and subtle, you know?

        i was sleepy. i got hungry. had some burger meat and i'm awake again for now. engh. i think, for me, good burgers are the ones piled with toppings and condiments. i can easily do without ground beef

        ok good my eyes are still burning, i'm not awake

        oh god bear just sneezed on my ankle.. i've been picking myself apart and my not sparkly clean abode apart. i keep reminding myself i have broken bones where bones shouldn't be broken, ergo i should cut myself some slack but i keep internally yelling QUIT BEING LAZY THIS PLACE IS MESSY CLEAN IT ALL NOW MOVE THAT TABLE BLOW THOSE LEAVES HUT HUT HUT

        and i should probably do something with my hair

        buy some new jeans

        ..clean out my car

        what if i have a beard hair from gramma food that i missed and he sees it and is disgusted like voldemorte was but bay is too nice to look disgusted and say 'goddamn' in a disgusted tone

        what if what if what if, i could list them all night

        and he wouldn't tell me what foods he liked so i could get them, he just said to send him out hunting with a stick and rock

        i mean, i guess it's okay. i just thought a host was supposed to feed the guest, but if you want to hunt a deer then this is the place to do it

        can we have split custody on the fur rug? or make 2 pair of boots out of it and i get one? i'll help you clean the kill *brow waggle*

        and i wish i understood dog behavior sometimes. bear has this thing about my hand. he sits by me, stares at me going 'peh.. heh heh.. peh' til i look at him, he stops, ears perk, eyes glow, i stick my hand down to scritch him and he sits on his back feets, neck tucked in so his mane puffs out, waves his arms around to catch me with his tongue sticking out of his teeth and licks my wrist while i scratch his chest and pants 'hah hah hah hah'

        i know this is straight forward behavior, but he's such a goofball. what does his brain say during the whole thing?

        hand.. hand.. hand... .....hand? hand! hand!handhandhandhand yay hand
        beautiful
        yeah you are

        Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
        lol

        Comment


        • Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
          i think i've found my everyday look

          nice and subtle, you know?

          and i should probably do something with my hair

          buy some new jeans

          ..clean out my car

          what if i have a beard hair from gramma food that i missed and he sees it and is disgusted like voldemorte was but bay is too nice to look disgusted and say 'goddamn' in a disgusted tone

          what if what if what if, i could list them all night

          and he wouldn't tell me what foods he liked so i could get them, he just said to send him out hunting with a stick and rock

          i mean, i guess it's okay. i just thought a host was supposed to feed the guest, but if you want to hunt a deer then this is the place to do it

          can we have split custody on the fur rug? or make 2 pair of boots out of it and i get one? i'll help you clean the kill *brow waggle*
          New look? If THAT doesn't get his attention, he has no attention to get... and you should quit worrying about it...

          Just feed him well, show him your false advertising, he will be happy..... I'm speaking from a purely male perspective, of course

          Comment


          • boobs and steak it is then
            beautiful
            yeah you are

            Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
            lol

            Comment


            • Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
              boobs and steak it is then
              The perfect date is comprised of 3 elements.... The 3 B's....... Boobs, Beer and Beef...... hmmm I just noticed all of those things have round shaped letters in the middle, and in pairs none the less!

              Comment


              • Originally posted by ssn679doc View Post
                The perfect date is comprised of 3 elements.... The 3 B's....... Boobs, Beer and Beef...... hmmm I just noticed all of those things have round shaped letters in the middle, and in pairs none the less!
                I should add that they do not necessarily have to be in that order and could potentially be repeated. Boobs, beer, beef, and boobs would not be amiss.

                Comment


                • Originally posted by canio6 View Post
                  I should add that they do not necessarily have to be in that order and could potentially be repeated. Boobs, beer, beef, and boobs would not be amiss.
                  nor would boobs, beer, boobs, beef, boobs... (the ... is the mathematical notation)

                  Comment


                  • Originally posted by ssn679doc View Post
                    nor would boobs, beer, boobs, beef, boobs... (the ... is the mathematical notation)
                    Well, being a man of refined tastes I would have to substitute one of the bs with b-b in tribute to my man, Sir-Mix-a-Lot: boobs, beer, boobs, beef, and big butts. After all, I cannot lie.

                    Comment


                    • so i should stuff my bra with socks and the back of my pants with water balloons so i can twerk like a pro, steak in one hand and beer in the other?
                      beautiful
                      yeah you are

                      Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                      lol

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
                        so i should stuff my bra with socks and the back of my pants with water balloons so i can twerk like a pro, steak in one hand and beer in the other?
                        stop it... your getting me all excited here! How is the steak cooked?

                        Comment


                        • it's still mooing



                          *nodnod*
                          beautiful
                          yeah you are

                          Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                          lol

                          Comment


                          • BO - what day does Bay actually visit ????????

                            cos you may have time for a booty lift !!!!!!!!!!!!! a boosum insertion !!!!!!!!!!!!! and a cow killing excursion !!!!!!!!!!!
                            Just yell if you need a hand - I am sure that Doc and his hence men would be there in a flash
                            "never let the truth get in the way of a good story "

                            ...small steps....

                            Comment


                            • tomorrow! aaagggghhhhhh

                              I'VE RUN OUT OF TIME
                              beautiful
                              yeah you are

                              Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                              lol

                              Comment


                              • thats fine BO - just go with the first option.
                                How long is he staying ????????
                                "never let the truth get in the way of a good story "

                                ...small steps....

                                Comment

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