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  • Originally posted by gay panda View Post
    lady friend's ewes are incurable romantics. They want candy and flowers, to hold hooves at the seashore, to be escorted to jennifer aniston movies and to be titillated with naughty jokes that go just a little too far but no farther than that.

    The last ram understood that, and so he was very popular among the ewes. Unfortunately, lady friend's new ram is a business man. He was brought on to do a job, and that job is all he intends to do. He hates jennifer aniston and doesn't believe in spending money on flowers that are going to die in a few days anyway. And so he approached them in a business fashion, not a gentlemanly one.

    In addition to being incurable romantics, the kind who sigh at zales commercials for perfect moment diamond rings and scream at the tousles in john mayer's hair, lady friend's ewes are also amazons. And they kicked the ever-loving sh*t out of business man this morning. They booted him from one end of the pasture to another in an orgy of violence at having their romantic passions thwarted in favor of his base instincts. I have no pictures for you. It was disturbing. We finally called everyone over and threw enormous heaps of hay over the fence in the hopes of distracting them. It appears to have worked temporarily, as the passions of sheep for food run even higher than rubbing the face of business man into the ground.

    If any lambs result next march, it will be a miracle.
    hell hath no fury like a ewe scorned!
    It makes me sad that people are trying hard to do the right thing but failing because they have the wrong information.
    Without question, bacon is the most interesting meat in the world, and if it were capable of original thought, we wouldn't even be having an election this November in America. We would simply appoint bacon as our forever leader and live dutifully under its rule.

    Comment


    • Solution: throw rib roast in crockpot, get back to editing. Or, send Lady Friend out for nachos.

      I find crock pots to be wonderful.

      Comment


      • Originally posted by RaeVynn View Post
        Solution: throw rib roast in crockpot, get back to editing. Or, send Lady Friend out for nachos.

        I find crock pots to be wonderful.
        Good idea.
        Primal since March 5, 2012
        SW: 221 | CW: 204 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)



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        • I have four slow cookers. I think they are one of the best kitchen gadgets ever invented.
          “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

          Owly's Journal

          Comment


          • And if you're not patient enough for the slow cooker, there's the pressure cooker - my personal favourite kitchen gadget. Oh, it's 5 pm and there's nothing but braising cuts? And they're all frozen? No problem! Toss something in with an onion and a sploosh of wine and 40 minutes later it's tender and delicious.

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            • [I can't remember if you're reading the Rune series, but Runefly should also be available on Amazon tomorrow morning. I love the cover - the artist I have transforming my pencil scratchings into actual art is very talented.[/QUOTE]

              [internet shopping equivalent of flapping wildly around the house and rushing off to the bookstore having forgotten to put on pants]

              I have been in freakin' suspense all summer!! I may have to hold off reading them and save them for a plane trip in a couple of weeks. Then I will have HOURS of uninterrupted guilt-free reading.

              Oooooh, I love that they're in paperback, I want to hold them, my Preciousssss

              no nachos, ha ha. Too bad I don't run screaming from nachos......
              Cooking Primal with Otter - Journal
              Otter's (Defunct) Primal Log
              "Not baked goods, Professor, baked bads!" ~ The Tick

              Comment


              • Dammit. Now I want nachos.
                My Journal

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                • Well, Remorse has shown up, but Resolve remains MIA. Maybe tomorrow ... *sigh*
                  I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best.

                  Oscar Wilde

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                  • Resolve showed up at my office yesterday afternoon. There's a theater-style popcorn machine in the boardroom, and someone decided to make a batch yesterday afternoon. One of the women offered me a bag and I turned it down, noting that I am trying to get my eating on track before the Christmas parties hit.

                    Of course, then last night I had a snack of avocado oil potato chips and a hard cider while I was making the curry for dinner, but those are both primal legal and I'm not hung up on carbs (ooh, look at me rationalize!).
                    “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

                    Owly's Journal

                    Comment


                    • That List o' Whiplash is making me want to become a dominatrix. Why should Resolve have all the fun?

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                      • November 7th: Inspirational Moments

                        I allow divine love to permeate my thoughts.

                        DEBAUCHERY: MMMM-MMM3@RRRFFFFF-MM**M!!! MM%MM MM-M DD-D FF-F!!! RRRFFDJH4TSKDF KTTTKJT!!! SDJF!!!
                        GAY PANDA: That’s really insightful, Debauchery! I’m surprised. I was all ready to make fun of that affirmation in this post, but now I really do want to spend this day allowing divine love to permeate me.
                        REMORSE: What did she say? How do you understand her with the tape over her mouth?
                        RESOLVE: We’ll have to agree to disagree on that one, Debauchery, but it was a lovely sentiment.
                        REMORSE: WHAT DID SHE SAY?!?!?

                        GAY PANDA: So, how's the doughnut tutu?
                        DEBAUCHERY: MASLK$$$DFJMMMTK LKASEHJT((LKJ!!!
                        RESOLVE: Well, you brought it upon yourself. So don't go looking here for sympathy.
                        GAY PANDA: Resolve, that's not acting with divine love. Apparently you are not yet fully permeated.
                        RESOLVE: Maybe not. But your breath is permeated with the scent of nachos.
                        DEBAUCHERY: LKSNDOGIWH98)*(&^%*^&%!!!
                        GAY PANDA: You weren't here, Resolve! You were flying around tending your List o' Whiplash and I was all alone with Debauchery! I made the rib roast AND I had nachos later. It's really Lady Friend's fault, because I didn't go out for them. Anyway, I don't see what the big deal is about nachos. It's chicken and salsa and cheese and sour cream and mysterious green sprigs on a few crumbling corn chips. The Magical Bamboo Forest Bean Shortage continues at this restaurant.

                        REMORSE: There’s a bite out of the back of this doughnut. Debauchery? Did you bite the doughnut after being told not to?
                        GAY PANDA: How could she? Her lips are taped shut.
                        DEBAUCHERY: LSKDHGOWIEH(*^$HOI?>><<??? OWI4HGE**KSD!!!
                        REMORSE: I have no idea what you just said. Well, was it you, Panda?
                        GAY PANDA: Doughnuts aren’t primal.
                        REMORSE: That wasn’t an answer.
                        GAY PANDA: Forgiveness is a gift I give to myself over and over again. And over and over and over . . . ah, fully permeated. I love you all. Be as snide as you want today. I am made of nothing but divine love.
                        JOIN THE PANDA SHOW!!! Primal With A Side Of FABULOUS and PANDALOONERY!

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                        • I just had pumpkin pie for my second breakfast and I feel completely permeated by divine love, or whatever that feeling is you get when your children accomplish great things. Like making pie. Also it is sunny and beautiful here today. And I made it to the gym this morning. Yup, a whole lotta divine love permeating me today.

                          (In my defense, I am 5 months pregnant and pumpkin pie has only one crust and the rest is basically primal goodness. Presuming one tolerates dairy well, which I totally do, and is willing to overlook the "canned evaporated" part of the milk that went into it. And the half cup of sugar.)

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                          • Dear PG&E,

                            It is very hard for me to surf the Internet (instead of working) when YOU KNOCK OUT MY POWER ALL DAY LONG. Do you have any idea what went on while I was cut off from the world? CPS was called on Octomom again! Lindsay Lohan is in deep piles of troll poo for lying to the cops! Not to mention the Pit Bull Battle of '12 with the Sixteenth Minute of Fame Kate Gosselin! Oh, and the election.

                            It was also hard to get on a treadmill without power, to prepare meat without power, and to charge my cell phone without power. I finally found my cell phone, cleverly hidden by Benign Poltergeist down the back of the sofa, and I could not charge it. My stove has locked itself against naughty children and technologically-incompetent pandas, so I will have to call Lady Friend for a reminder on the particular hand signals and demon rituals necessary to unlock it.

                            You gave me quite a day, PG&E. You are lucky that today's affirmation permeated me with divine love.

                            Lucky indeed.
                            Gay Panda
                            JOIN THE PANDA SHOW!!! Primal With A Side Of FABULOUS and PANDALOONERY!

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by Owly View Post
                              avocado oil potato chips
                              I've bought these.
                              Twice
                              Avocado oil is good oil
                              Right?
                              "Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." Kurt Vonnegut
                              "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." Douglas Adams
                              "Moderation sucks." Suse
                              "Wine is a vegetable." Meaty
                              "Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow and the day after that." Cmdr Chris Hadfield


                              Winencandy

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                              • Avocado oil is lovely oil. Good for you. Not mainstream enough yet to be made by big agribusiness. And it's a pretty color.

                                I used duck fat to cook french fries the other night. My tongue had multiple tastegasms. The duck was good, but the duck fat french fries were like mana from heaven. I think I may have to figure out how to go to a potato based primal diet.
                                "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                                B*tch-lite

                                Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

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