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  • Thank you all. I appreciate the support and its needed as well.

    I will be glad to see the end of this week. JUST when you think the week will not get worse, it does (and it is not even work related). My stress is such as I feel stinging cracklings in my neck and shoulders, it hurts..I want to just run away. The problem with Lily is getting worse. We are talking more lying from me and stealing from me as well. I am not raising her like this! WTF?!!!

    oh and +1, 322
    Last edited by athomeontherange; 05-16-2014, 06:00 AM.
    Karin


    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

    What am I doing? Depends on the day.

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    • rats on all counts, unfortunately I have nothing to add except hugs.

      Does her therapist have anything to help?
      Chris
      "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It is about learning to dance in the rain."
      Unknown

      My journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread36279.html

      My "Program": doing my version of a 4:3 - 3 day fast diet with real food every day, with a little twist of anti-inflammatory mixed in.

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      • Sorry. Hope things get better.
        Primal since 9/24/2010
        "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

        Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools
        MFP username: MDAPebbles67

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        • At the moment we do not have a therapist. Our last therapist gave up on us. I am at the banging my head against the wall stage.
          She gets consequences and just does not care. I am exhausted as I am "on" 24/7. She and my mom clash so bad, not much help on that front.

          Community service day today at school. Last year we washed police cars, today we cleaned up the landscape at a church then we do a movie and last, kickball. Not a bad day at school generally.

          Food today... Let's not talk about it.


          Sent from my iPad using Marks Daily Apple Forum
          Karin


          Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

          What am I doing? Depends on the day.

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          • interesting concept here...Middle School Mondays: When Your Child Lies, Cheats, or Steals and Otherwise Does Something That Conflicts With Your Values - BRADEN BELL

            starts to help explain the unexplainable.
            Chris
            "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It is about learning to dance in the rain."
            Unknown

            My journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread36279.html

            My "Program": doing my version of a 4:3 - 3 day fast diet with real food every day, with a little twist of anti-inflammatory mixed in.

            Comment


            • Interesting article Chris. It's all so disheartening.

              I think you ladies are on to something where I need a stricter regime. I am all for this but bemoaning that wine will be off the table with a whole 30. I was doing @ 20g of carbs and really think this is my magic number for success. It's amazing how stress has you craving the carbs. For comfort?


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              Karin


              Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

              What am I doing? Depends on the day.

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              • 20g? Really seems too low to sustain, especially when you are stressed.

                If you can limit yourself to one wine a day maybe that can be your indulgence? I mean it is your whole 30 right?

                I am sure the whole thing is very disheartening with Lily especially since it seemed to have turned a positive corner. Hugs.
                Chris
                "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It is about learning to dance in the rain."
                Unknown

                My journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread36279.html

                My "Program": doing my version of a 4:3 - 3 day fast diet with real food every day, with a little twist of anti-inflammatory mixed in.

                Comment


                • I'm going to throw some stuff out here, none of which may be relevant. You know I've only been doing this for 2 months......

                  Lily sounds a lot like my boys and the other kids my friends deal with. If that's the case, and I know this is a big IF, then consequences are NOT going to work, especially in melt down mode. It's something to do with brain chemistry.

                  Also, how is her emotional age? My 17 year, when in the midst of emotions, is nowhere near 17. I'm talking like between 5 and 10. And, that's how we have to respond (which is not easy................). Seriously, consequences appropriate for a 17 year old are often way too much, and totally ineffective, for him (this actually goes for all 3 of my boys). When consequences are appropriate to their emotional age, they respond better. Frustrating? Yes. Against everything we've ever been taught and consistent with "typical" parenting? Yes. Reality? Yes.

                  All progress, at least with my kids, is followed by regression. Then, they progress a little more, then more regression.

                  End of school is a major stressor. My kids are slightly disregulated from it. While they are happy on some level for the some summer, they are stressed. Their routine is gone. Their social interaction is curtailed. Summer is full of uncertainty and lots of unknowns. Causes a big problem.

                  Anyway, like I said, disregard if none of this holds anything of value
                  -- Ruth

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                  • A note on Whole 30...I used to think it was ok to leave in some things that they say need to be removed. Now I feel differently. It is actually easier to follow the rules. I think something small like a glass of wine could make a big negative difference.

                    No advice on the Lily front. Sorry.
                    Primal since 9/24/2010
                    "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

                    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools
                    MFP username: MDAPebbles67

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                    • Oh man, emotional age throws a kink into everything. No idea where the emotional age is. Ugh!! Sage advice here sistah!


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                      Karin


                      Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

                      What am I doing? Depends on the day.

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                      • So, ok..it's Saturday morning and a great day for a positive change. I have yet to get on the scale, in fact still waking up. A good day as any to start a whole30. I do not have any ghee so will have to make some today. I am going to do the whole program and not adapt it.

                        As for carbs, I do know I have a sweet spot for weight-loss and it's less than 50g. I am going to track my food (can't remember if that was advised), i do have the book it starts with food though. Reading through it this morning.


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                        Karin


                        Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

                        What am I doing? Depends on the day.

                        Comment


                        • It is a good day. As I recall, you do not track. However, I did track (after the fact), because I wanted to be able to go back and see what I did.

                          Here are some breakfast recipes for you.
                          1. Jicama Oatmeal. Jicama "oatmeal" ~ Stuff I Make My Husband
                          2. Sausage and Egg “McMuffin”. Paleo Sausage Egg
                          3. Eggs Poached in Tomato Sauce (Shakshuka). Shakshuka (Eggs Poached in Spicy Tomato Sauce) | Mark's Daily Apple
                          4. Spinach Frittata. simple spinach frittata | Love and Lemons
                          5. Sweet Potato Hash with Fried Eggs. Sweet Potato Hash (with Fried Eggs!) | Award-Winning Paleo Recipes | Nom Nom Paleo
                          6. Steak and Eggs with Sauteed Cabbage. Steak and Eggs with Sautéed Cabbage - Primal Palate
                          7. Breakfast Sausage. Breakfast Sausages - Primal Palate
                          8. Breakfast Carbonara. Paleo Breakfast Carbonara - Paleo Cupboard
                          9. Breakfast Lasagna. Paleo Breakfast Lasagna | Paleo Family Eats
                          10. Breakfast Mash Bowl. Sooo Paleo: Breakfast Mash Bowl
                          11. Breakfast Hot Pot. The Urban Poser:: Rethinking Breakfast TWO: The Breakfast Hot Pot!
                          12. Breakfast Burrito. [Watch the ham ingredients…] Paleo Breakfast Burrito Recipe | Just A Pinch Recipes
                          13. Breakfast “Pizza”. Paleo Breakfast Pizza | Jenna Antonelli - a creative porfolio
                          14. Breakfast Pie. [Swap ghee for butter] the preppy paleo: Paleo Breakfast Cauliflower Pie (Recipe Revisit)
                          15. Breakfast Squash. Jen's Gone Paleo: Breakfast Squash
                          16. Breakfast Meatza. Breakfast Meatza – Kalli Foods
                          17. Breakfast Stir Fry. POWER MORNING MEAL: PALEO BREAKFAST STIR FRY RECIPE - Paleo Recipes
                          18. Breakfast Bowl. Paleo Breakfast Bowl | fastPaleo Primal and Paleo Diet Recipes
                          19. Rutabega Egg Nests. PaleOMG – Paleo Recipes – Rutabaga Egg Nests
                          20. Baked Eggs in Avocado. Baked Eggs in Avocado
                          21. Indian Eggs with Tomatoes. A Different Paleo Breakfast Idea - Indian Eggs with Roasted Vine Tomatoes | It's Time to Burn
                          22. Bacon, Egg, Avocado, Tomato Salad. MIH Recipe Blog: Bacon, Egg, Avocado and Tomato Salad
                          23. Herbed-Baked Eggs. [Sub coconut or almond milk for cream; ghee for butter] Herbed-Baked Eggs Recipe : Ina Garten : Food Network
                          24. Cowboy Breakfast Skillet. [Skip the cheese] Health-Bent | Recipes | Cowboy Breakfast Skillet
                          25. Mexican Chilaquiles. Paleo Mexican Chilaquiles | Plaid & Paleo
                          26. Scotch Eggs. Primal Scotch Eggs | Mark's Daily Apple
                          27. Breakfast Tuna Salad. Paleo Recipe Tuna Salad
                          28. Taco Wannabe Mexican Breakfast Bowl. [PALEO] Taco Wannabe Mexican Breakfast Bowl | The Best Paleo CookBook
                          29. Breakfast Burger. Breakfast Burgers | Gabby's Gluten-Free
                          30. Breakfast Shephard’s Pie. Breakfast Shepherds Pie | Fresh4Five
                          -- Ruth

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                          • Here is a little out of the box idea. It comes under the "do unto others as you would have them do to you" category. If your kiddo is stealing and lying to you, take a few of her precious things, allow her to discover it and how it feels. Maybe find a way to tell a lie that will effect her and let it be discovered as well. It will open the path for discovery and discussion for both of you. As a parent, we often get caught up in the " raising a good/perfect kid" and forget that they have reasons/ motivating factors as well. All kids go through some sort of stage like this. Hoping you find resolution too.

                            FWIW, our daughter did a bit of this. After she swiped something from Michaels the second time ( the first time she had to go back and pay for the item and apologize) I put her in jail in her room for a week. She was allowed out for school and meals but nothing else. I would visit her and play games in her room and we would discuss jail and stealing and the realities. I also explained that if she went to jail that I would feel that I failed to teach her and would be heart broken. I also explained that lying is stealing the truth. While this worked well for me and solved this problem, your path and solutions will most likely be different.

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                            • Ruth, love the links and combing through them




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                              Karin


                              Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

                              What am I doing? Depends on the day.

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by Mud Flinger View Post
                                Here is a little out of the box idea. It comes under the "do unto others as you would have them do to you" category. If your kiddo is stealing and lying to you, take a few of her precious things, allow her to discover it and how it feels. Maybe find a way to tell a lie that will effect her and let it be discovered as well. It will open the path for discovery and discussion for both of you. As a parent, we often get caught up in the " raising a good/perfect kid" and forget that they have reasons/ motivating factors as well. All kids go through some sort of stage like this. Hoping you find resolution too.

                                FWIW, our daughter did a bit of this. After she swiped something from Michaels the second time ( the first time she had to go back and pay for the item and apologize) I put her in jail in her room for a week. She was allowed out for school and meals but nothing else. I would visit her and play games in her room and we would discuss jail and stealing and the realities. I also explained that if she went to jail that I would feel that I failed to teach her and would be heart broken. I also explained that lying is stealing the truth. While this worked well for me and solved this problem, your path and solutions will most likely be different.
                                Interesting ideas..pondering this.. Thank you.


                                Sent from my iPad using Marks Daily Apple Forum
                                Karin


                                Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

                                What am I doing? Depends on the day.

                                Comment

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