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Round 2 {birthdays, bipolar, and antisugar}

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  • Well, I don't necessarily regret saying it all, just that I let it all get to me. I told all of that to the hubs this morning before he went for work and he was understanding. That was good. Now I just need some cuddle time with him.

    The garden is finally tilled and I have some plants out there layed out about where I want them so we are finally rocking and rolling! It's 1800 sq ft and I swear we are growing a house. There are already 3 "rooms" out there for my girl (2 bean teepees and 1 sunflower house). I'll be putting a tent out there for her and I need to pull a small portable potty out there for her. It's a lot fo work but so far I have eaten primally today (not totally healthily primal since I had some primal cookies and am lacking in the meat department right now but primal nonetheless). I can see myself having a picnic area out there and always having water and snacks on hand for long days in the garden (because it's a bit of a walk from the main house). I'll have to pull some art activities out there for her and have a not-easily-broken vase out there for all of the small flowers she picks (buttercups and such).

    I'm happy because I finally have "work" to do that will be saving us money long-term. That's part of my issue lately, too-that I don't feel that I make a contribution to saving/making money. But I now have ways to help save money and will be bringing in a side income by sewing custom works for people.

    Gorgeous's (DD) birthday is in 2 months and I'm thinking that the family party (because we'll have an immediate family DAY on her birthday and then an extended family party around her birthday-no friend parties yet since she doesn't have too many due to her age) will be coconut themed like on MMCH (there's an episode where Coco the monkey has a coconutty party) which will work well with the primal diet (coconut cake with berries, coconut "candies", coconut milk, maybe even actual coconuts if I can find some for inexpensive, plus the usual meat and veggies). I saw that episode today and a lightbulb moment happened!

    I'm still down a bit from last night's emotional blowout but I think I need ot just ask for more activities for myself instead of doing the typical mom-thing where mom is last. It doesn't make for much satisfaction. One of the me-things I am doing? Learning Swedish (slowly, through the use of songs mostly) and teaching it to Gorgeous. I've always had a strong tie to my Swedish heritage (3rd generation Swedish American) and Christmas has always been Swedish themed. So I'm going to learn some Swedish and focus on getting more Swedish books and music for my DD and I to share. It makes me happy. I also want to learn how to whittle (maybe make a Dala Horse for my first project!). And I want to get back into sewing things like a dress that I've had cut out but not sewn for 2 years now. I want to sew it then make a modified version of the same dress in yellow for my parents vow renewal.
    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread34085.html


    9/6/11: 390.1lbs

    5/22/12: 339.4lbs

    Goal: 175lbs

    Comment


    • Okay, so for various reasons I haven't eaten fully Primal in about a month and yet I weighed myself today (start of Day 1 of Lunar Cycle if you catch my drift) and I am still only 345. O.O I was totally preparing myself for 350's or even 360's and praying not to see the dreaded 370. I am SO SURPRISED! I don't know what has been going right in all of this wrong! If anyone has guesses I am glad to hear them (I'm thinking simply an increase in exercise due to gardening-lots of walking and lots of heavy lifting as I transport all of the stuff out there for the season). I've been eating horrible (though not all day like I used to) so I'm not sure!

      That said, I am not where I want to be (if I never get down past Queen Latifah's size I'd still be happy but I'm not there either) and I don't feel amazing so I know that I still should eat primal. When I eat Primal my hip doesn't try to give out from endo/pain like it has been this past week. When I eat Primal I can get up at 5:30 with my toddler. When I eat Primal I am a safer driver because I am more aware and have less brain fog. :/
      My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread34085.html


      9/6/11: 390.1lbs

      5/22/12: 339.4lbs

      Goal: 175lbs

      Comment


      • Out of the two paleo books for kids we have reviewed one (ELaD) and have the second on order with the library. But I realized that, although these ARE gender neutral, what do the girls have to read (thinking the stereotypical girl fare-princesses, etc). Maybe I should write a story for my daughter (and illustrate) about a princess who gardens and hunts... Take a que from The Paperbag Princess and make a stereotypical story for girls turn into some serious butt kicking girl power. It may help her understand that eating meat and veggies isn't going to kill her, lol. I could even draw the character to look like her. It'd obviously be geared towards the 2-6 range (think preschool/kindergarden) since she is turning 2. How cool would it be for her to get a book written and drawn by mom just for her and about her? ESPECIALLY for her birthday!

        We've been dealing with her feeling like she HAS to be girly and wear dresses after all of this went down with the preschool (plus a bit of peer pressure related to the fact that no one ate like she did) so it may help with her confidence in who she is (a tutu wearing tree climber if I'd let her).
        My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread34085.html


        9/6/11: 390.1lbs

        5/22/12: 339.4lbs

        Goal: 175lbs

        Comment


        • As of today I am 345lbs. I am PMSing and I am CRAVING some pasta salad, or if that is too expensive I would take chips and dip. UGH! I decided when I woke up this morning that I wasn't going to eat anything sugary or grainy. I've had some PB but, besides a lot of berries, that is the only thing I've eaten today that is not primal. I don't know why I chose today but I did.

          I ate cheesy eggs and bacon this morning with some strawberries. Snack was a banana, raspberries and PB. Lunch was 2 hot dogs and a chocolate bananacado strawberry smoothie. Now I want food! I know it's my body saying give me sugar but damn! If I broke right now I would be happy that this is the best I've eaten in about 2 months. I wouldn't be proud but I would be happy. I'm tired of my mind playing tricks, of my body being sore all the time, of the lack of energy. Grrrr.

          I've also decided that I will NEVER see the 360's ever again in my life and WHEN I get down to the 200's I will NEVER again see a 300 as long as I live. That is my vow to myself.

          I've also decided that I WILL be moving BY October WITH OR WITHOUT my husband. I cannot live in his boyhood room and raise a family. If his work slumps in August I will be getting a job and my mom will watch my daughter. It doesn't make me happy but I cannot live here and raise my family. If his work stays steady or (please be the second one) increases in August then I will be looking for a place for my birthday in September.

          In good news: I've been making a dress for my parents vow renewal next weekend and for the first time in a loooooong time I was able to use a basic pattern without adding panels in the sides.
          My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread34085.html


          9/6/11: 390.1lbs

          5/22/12: 339.4lbs

          Goal: 175lbs

          Comment


          • A Paleo Princess book! What a great idea!
            "Do, or do not. There is no try."--Jedi Master Yoda

            Comment


            • That was obviously supposed to be a reply to your post about wanting stories about princesses who farm and hunt.

              Hang in there, Metalsporks--you are doing great. You are a very strong woman--your daughter is lucky to have you as a mother.

              And congratulations for maintaining your weight, even while off the wagon. Sometimes not gaining is as important as losing....

              I'm rooting for you!
              "Do, or do not. There is no try."--Jedi Master Yoda

              Comment


              • I've been gaining due to the foods I've been eating now. I am in soooooo much pain from endo (at the end of my week) that just sitting here I am nearly in tears. I'm looking for any natural, affordable way to relieve pain. So far natural and affordable are not coinciding with each other. I want help! But I can't seem to afford to eat the way I should that also allows me to manage my pain! :'( I'm noooooooootttttttt happy... Crap, now comes the tears and my daughter is in the room. Logging off...
                My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread34085.html


                9/6/11: 390.1lbs

                5/22/12: 339.4lbs

                Goal: 175lbs

                Comment


                • Well, my daughter told my mom that she is eating like a dinosaur now. She said that tonight so it's time. Tomorrow will be day 1 for both of us. :/ I'll take her lead and remind her that she said that and what dinosaurs eat (meat and plants). It'll be rough (especially since we had no planning time) but we'll try it for "14 sleeps".

                  In other news: I'm tired of my flip flops falling apart (one keeps breaking and I keep fixing it) so I'm gonna try to DIY my own huaraches since Mark brought it to my attention with his link day. My FIL has some leftover tub sorround that I'll use for the sole and I'm going to search out big enough leather scraps to put my feet on. I'll also look for some nylon cord. We'll see how it goes. If it works out well I'll make some for my toddler (who really wants to wear underwear at night for her birthday).

                  I'm also lookign at moving back in with my parents and looking for a job since I cannot live with my in-laws anymore and the hubs business isn't taking off quick enough. Yes I'm angry and yes I have to get over it. My mom will provide daycare for the toddler and I'll just make her enviornment as educational as possible so I can suppliment her schooling. I may move for my birthday in early Sept or I will be doing it by the end of Oct.

                  I'm glad for our local Ruths Room though as I jsut picked up almost an entire wardrobe of winter clothes for my daughter today, including a carhart jacket. Now all we need is winter tights/leggings/socks and some winter shoes if she outgrows the current ones. She's also doing her teeth and bath almost completely by herself now and her birthday isn't for 3 more weeks! She's gonna get a video and phone call from Mickey for her birthday.

                  At least I have some support on no soda from thehubs. Now if I can just get him to try Paleo for 2 weeks or so.
                  My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread34085.html


                  9/6/11: 390.1lbs

                  5/22/12: 339.4lbs

                  Goal: 175lbs

                  Comment


                  • OOOH! Tell us how the DIY huaraches goes, please! I've been wanting to do that since I read about it.

                    Great that your daughter wants to go Paleo. Now that your husband is outnumbered--who knows what will happen?

                    Keep an eye on that tendency to wear "underwear at night" :-) Could get interesting when she's about 18 or so....

                    Good luck with everything, MetalSporks, and do keep us posted!
                    "Do, or do not. There is no try."--Jedi Master Yoda

                    Comment


                    • I've been looking into getting some leather and then I can make the huaraches.

                      As for us going Paleo? We tried it and then realized on Day 2 that we can't afford it. When it is truely less expensive to eat oatmeal all day than meat... That's all we have. We just applied for foodstamps so we can only pray we get enough money from them to buy good food.

                      She'll be switching out of diapers after her birthday this weekend.
                      My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread34085.html


                      9/6/11: 390.1lbs

                      5/22/12: 339.4lbs

                      Goal: 175lbs

                      Comment


                      • YAY! We have mondo amounts of foodstamps! FINALLY we can stop eating from the dollar store! That means that we can finally go Primal! Right now we've been going a bit crazy with our newfound food freedom and have been getting whatever (mostly from Farmers Market though). But now we're going to be going GF, LF (legume) as we eat up other foods in our house. My husband has even agreed to do this (provided he can eat candy still). Once we go completely GF we'll slowly replace them with Primal alternatives to transition my daughter and I. But we're also going to be starting to focus more on fruits, veggies, and meats while reducing the amount of baked goods on the plate. Once we are completely primal we'll go paleo and from there I will go AIPaleo. Next week is D week (2 weeks) and we'll be doing a large focus on Dinosaurs so we can tie it to Eat Like a Dinosaur. We're even going to be doing a sorting activity where we sort plants (fruits and veggies) from meat because that's what dinosaurs eat. She loves going out the garden with Grandpa (her fear of slugs is diminishing partly due to our meat goat we have near the garden that she loves and the mounds of blackberries we have out there that she adores) and picking foods. Our apple trees and pear trees are starting to ripen and we have tons of falling off the vine blackberries. We also have some grape leaves I may try to dry and use as a lemon seasoning. What I need to find is a paleo/primal zucchini bread recipe (I got 9.5 cups of zucchini for 2 bucks from farmers!) and some sugar free (no chemical) blackberry freezer jam recipes. I'm going to have to make a bunch of applesauce and pear sauce as well.

                        In other news things have been stressful as crud. My daughter has been diagnosed as gifted so I've been focusing on trying to help her overcome some of her "issues" like sock seams, slug fears, and perfectionism. I've been looking into schools for her since I'm also looking for a job. Once I find a FT job it'll be a matter of months before we can move out onto our own. My hubs is also looking for a PT job starting in Sept to supplument his business income. I have an interview for a PT job tomorrow. 2 PT jobs are fine! My deceased grandma's inheritence will be accessable next month after my birthday and I am getting a little bit to go into savings and be used for myself and my daughter (my parents and my grandmas request-myself first). I'm going to get some things I've been needing and/or wanting for a long time! I'm also going to get some Montessori materials for my daughter. I've been helping my mom jump start her sewing business (on facebook under Cindy Nystrom-she makes clothing, mostly for little kids, but she is willing to take custom orders) and may be doing some sewing myself on the side (I make waldorf birthday crowns, flag banners/streamers, and montessori isnpired kid aprons). I swear there's been more going on but I forget it now. Maybe the homeschooling of my daughter? Idk...

                        Basically it's time to restart my life! Once I lose enough weight I can get a laparoscopy done if needed to see how far advanced my endo is. I'm debating on getting Mirena for it but for now I think I'll wait since putting extra hormones in a plastic device and into me doesn't seem like it will help long term when the main issue with endo is hormone imbalance.
                        My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread34085.html


                        9/6/11: 390.1lbs

                        5/22/12: 339.4lbs

                        Goal: 175lbs

                        Comment


                        • This all sounds like such great news! I hope re-starting goes well for you and your family. Keep us posted!
                          Depression Lies

                          Comment


                          • Thanks. I'm glad to have my husband on board for this, at least in part. It makes it easier. Right now we're still eating through the grains but I've started with dinner and breakfast. I try to focus ont he meat and provide 2 plant based foods. She is having a hard time with eating meat so tonight we'll be doing chicken strips in rice flour instead of the usual crud. Eventually we'll be able to move away from this sort of "trickery" and it'll be great. I'm also going to let her pick one VEGETABLE from farmers to try every week. Right now is fruit season but we have enough of that already. So she can pick one veggie and it might help her try new foods. I also put tomatoes (a food she famously despises) on her plate at lunch today. I put 3 different kinds of cherry tomatoes in front of her and she tried each one then promptly spit it back out. I was next to her going to town on them with lots of ooos and aaaahs and I actually got her to try half of yet another kind of one. I asked her if I could eat half of it before she did and she said yes. She ate it and did a lot of sour faces but kept eating the insides until the skin accidentally gagged her. Semi-success. I then told her they were natures candy and she seemed cool about it.

                            My mom brought up the fact that we often have put a veggie on her plate and told her to eat it because we were pretty sure she wouldn't like it so I tried to just put it there nonchalantly and eat the same food next to her with admiration. I think over time I can ham it up less and she'll eat more. Thanks to my mom for pointing that one out!
                            My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread34085.html


                            9/6/11: 390.1lbs

                            5/22/12: 339.4lbs

                            Goal: 175lbs

                            Comment


                            • YAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!!!!!! I got a job! It's part time and is a preschool aide position. I think the Universe just told me what I am supposed to do with my life. So I'm going to work here while finishing up my AA degree and getting enough ECE units to become a preschool teacher. Afterwards I'll enlist in an online Montessori AMI training program for 3-6 yr olds in 2014 (when they're expecting to be accepting FAFSA). My goal is to be a Montessori teacher in my own home so I can also homeschool my daughter.

                              One stressor changed!
                              My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread34085.html


                              9/6/11: 390.1lbs

                              5/22/12: 339.4lbs

                              Goal: 175lbs

                              Comment

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