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  • #16
    Today was an experiment.
    I had some almonds...and a blueberry muffin...for breakfast. And cream of potato soup...with corn bread....for lunch. I know this stuff is bad for me and messes with me, and I know I just set myself back quite a few days with those two meals. But, I feel like it was good to do. Right after the muffin I was exhausted and still hungry. My sinuses are dried up, I feel like I need to brush my teeth 600 times, my breath stinks, I'm burpy and farty, and I feel like I just filled my stomach with glue. Thankfully, my joints are fine (if I overdo gluten too much the joints go crazy) but I'm really seriously bloated and just feel gross. I started eating primally about 5 weeks ago, but I wasn't 100% conscientious about moderating foods that should be moderated.

    I'm excited to start the whole30 tomorrow, despite what those two meals indicate!
    For dinner we're going to have some of the last few packaged foods from the freezer that have sugar in them - chicken skewers and a curry, thanks Trader Joes (at least it's not HFCS?)

    I want to say "oh, some safflower mayo or dark chocolate or stevia is ok" but then what's the point of committing to the whole30??
    I really want to do this to remind myself the following:
    what it feels like to have lifestyle standards and to stick with them, no matter how stressful other things are - food shoudl not be my stress relief!
    to see how my body reacts to stripping all of the crap out, again.

    I let stress take over, and I let social anxiety take over (even on the internet!), and I use food as a coping mechanism. I did it this morning, nervous about starting the whole30 and thinking I "deserved" junk food because I'm going to clean up tomorrow. It's just food. If I'm eating the right stuff, it should satiate and not put me in a weird non-stress high. I've been getting grumpy lately due to lack of sleep and lack of that high, I think, and I need to learn to eat without flooding my system with insulin.

    Things that don't have to do with food....I'm going to work out with weights 2x a week, and sprint at least once. This is not hard, this is not impossible, and this will fit with my ridiculous, loathsome school/work schedule. Ideally I want, by the end of the month, to get to a point where I'm managing my time well enough that I can work out in the morning before work - this will require me to get to bed pretty early, which means no dinner with my bf, but I guess I can still cook for us and sit with him when he does get home.
    he gets home 3 hours later than me. we really should invest in a microwave as much as i hate the idea. but, eating earlier will cut down on my grazing-until-dinner, too.

    And along those lines: the spare bedroom I use as an office/closet/workout room needs some work. we have an outside area too but it's just easier to do inside, and this spare room is currently a HUGE mess. it is messing with my brain. I need to go through and sort through the clothes I don't wear and it makes me feel like an episode of hoarders. clearing this out and keeping it clear, i think, will be more substantial than clearing out my diet, really.
    primal journal - the book of meatabix / food pr0n

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    • #17
      day 1 of the whole 30!
      I guarantee I will not stay this enthusiastic (well, not easily, anyway!)

      I took some measurements yesterday, all inflamed and gluten-heavy, but here they are:
      waist (at belly button) 34.5"
      upper arms 13"
      hips (butt/largest part) 39.5"
      thighs 23"
      bust 35"
      waist (narrowest part) 28.5"

      I threw out all my notebooks from the first time I got lean, but I do remember my thighs were 19" and my waist was hovering around 23. eek.

      I was still very bloaty from yesterday this morning and have gotten used to not really doing breakfast before work anyway...had 2 12oz mugs of coffee with a little bit of coconut oil. I've seen a couple people write that they put coconut oil in their coffee - for me, all it did was make a mess on the top of my coffee, ugh. I think I'll try cinnamon next time. Is there some trick to getting the coconut oil to mix well with the coffee? Would it be insane to put coconut flakes in with the coffee grounds?! lol! I'll try that one of these days.

      Lunch - I honestly was still not very hungry, but had a chicken breast on greens. There were sesame seeds on the chicken but I'm trying to avoid nuts and snacking on them - so I'm not counting that

      I feel like I'm doing a lot of justifying already

      I had two hard boiled eggs and some carrots and celery after I got home but before I walked to the store. Inadvertently, I kind of did a mini-WOW (and then totally forgot I wanted to weigh the grocery bag when I got home). I walked home from work yesterday, almost 4 miles...this is from a huge university, 30k students or so, and there is literally no sidewalk for a huge stretch on two different roads. I didn't even think of it - I knew there was a bike lane but never realized the sidewalk just dissipates. No signs, nada, you're just stuck walking in the gutter or almost in a canyon. This city was made for cars.

      Dinner was very green:

      Broccoli, kale/braising mix, cabbage, and avocado from the farmer's market
      Chicken sausage from (i plead the fifth) Safeway (surprisingly, no rogue additives or nitrites)

      Right now I'm at 943 calories, but seriously, yesterday was over 2000. It's looking like natural calm and then bed. do not care if natural calm is in the whole 30 or not, robb wolf says its ok. neener neener. I just can't cram more food in this stomach, and I'm not going to get into it but I'm just going to say eating refined carbs yesterday & sunday really junked things up nicely.

      I have been thinking about how my brain has worked since getting chubby and a lot of it is attitude and poor self worth. Again, not getting into it, but I lost the me I had when I was about 23 and started to resign myself to being.....old and blah? iz not old and blah. I can do this and I will do this, and it will make me a better person. I can't go back to who I was, but I can take everything that I learned then and everything that I know now, and mash it all up with this pretty functional adult thing I have going on, and everything will be fine. There's some bagage and hoarding (mental and physical!) and I'm going to work on that, big time. Simpler is better, for food, for workouts, for general activity..simple works.
      Last edited by bix; 03-02-2011, 01:21 AM. Reason: added measurements
      primal journal - the book of meatabix / food pr0n

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      • #18
        It's great that the non-Primal food right before the Whole 30 was such a reminder of why Primal is a better WOE! The Day 1 food photo looks delicious-- nom, avocado!
        Life consists with wildness. The most alive is the wildest. (Thoreau)

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        • #19
          day2

          I'm going to write up some stuff quickly and then get to the homework; if I have time later I'll post calorie and pics and The Ridiculous Drawings

          activity: just walking, about an hour. not enough.
          SELF: LIFT. CLEAN YO' DAMN ROOM AND MAKE TIME FOR IT.
          NOTHING IS GOING TO HAPPEN IF YOU DO NOT LIFT.
          argh.

          IF from about 10pm - 11am
          breakfast - coffee. this time: with cinnamon. I forgot how awesome coffee with cinnamon is!! Still, could not make it through an entire mug.
          11am - leftover nitrite-free chicken sausage
          12:45 - can of tuna with 1/4 avocado
          4:00 - about 1/3 cup carrots
          6:30 - 3 stalks celery while cooking dinner
          7:00ish - leftover paleo beef stew over: cabbage, fennel, celery, onions, garlic..all cooked in coconut oil

          I posted the whole30 text and a page from robb wolf's site on the fridge for the bf to maybe notice. I've told him about it, but again with this stuff, I don't have luck evangelizing about it. I figure if he wants to read it he can.
          ...and he did! he said he would like to try it next month. Whether he does or not, he did read a little more in depth about paleo and wtf I'm trying to do here.

          feeling good today.
          stressed a little over this week, because work is just...argh...and I procrastinated on homework. The homework will all be over by Saturday and then I can get going on cleaning my office/weight room and that will eliminate 90% of the stress I have on weeknights...hopefully. by the end of this month I will be lifting in the morning, even if it's once during the week and once on Saturday. it's in print on a public forum. I will be requesting a public beating if I do not do this.
          primal journal - the book of meatabix / food pr0n

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          • #20
            Originally posted by sibylsybil View Post
            It's great that the non-Primal food right before the Whole 30 was such a reminder of why Primal is a better WOE! The Day 1 food photo looks delicious-- nom, avocado!
            exactly!!! I'm still feeling it, but god, I do not want to eat anything but things-that-are-good-for-me, still!
            avocados..I have a slight addiction
            primal journal - the book of meatabix / food pr0n

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            • #21
              Good luck on the whole30!! I did the same thing except x10 - I ate TONS of candy, french toast, bread, crap like that and got super bloated right before starting my 30 day challenge. Maybe I will get up the nerve to post the pictures...anyway- the results now are SO great! I had giant addictions to nuts, and gum and a lot of things that you can over do easily. I am on day 18 and have lost a lot of those cravings (ok mayyyybe I still think about almond butter a good amount haha). My point is, if you can make it through 30 days eliminating a lot of things, you feel SO much more in control of what you put into your body and you just feel great in general. I had a major binge problem leading up to this, so if I can do it, you can definitely do it!!! (espcially when you are making food that looks so delicious!!) Good luck, ill be following!!
              MY "GET AWESOMELY FIT AND HEALTHY" JOURNAL!

              "Become Your Dream" - De La Vega

              "“The fight is won or lost far away from witnesses - behind the lines, in the gym and out there on the road, long before I dance under those lights.” - Muhammad Ali

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              • #22
                Originally posted by BecomeYourDream View Post
                Good luck on the whole30!! I did the same thing except x10 - I ate TONS of candy, french toast, bread, crap like that and got super bloated right before starting my 30 day challenge. Maybe I will get up the nerve to post the pictures...anyway- the results now are SO great! I had giant addictions to nuts, and gum and a lot of things that you can over do easily. I am on day 18 and have lost a lot of those cravings (ok mayyyybe I still think about almond butter a good amount haha). My point is, if you can make it through 30 days eliminating a lot of things, you feel SO much more in control of what you put into your body and you just feel great in general. I had a major binge problem leading up to this, so if I can do it, you can definitely do it!!! (espcially when you are making food that looks so delicious!!) Good luck, ill be following!!
                aw, thanks, and whoa congrats on 18 days!!
                I agree that this is a great way to get control and perspective. I seem to do really good with rules, but I have a hard time enforcing them on my own, so having a set time and specific rules is easy. I have a huge problem with binging too, so I'm really excited to hear it's helped you in that respect. But I always know which foods will trigger them and still was torturing myself by buying those foods in the first place, ugh! Lately I have really learned to love cooking, but that was a huge trial-and-error process to begin with. If all else fails, I throw some avocado on it

                and yeah, I am not doing nuts either, but I sure think about them anyway...in the not-so-distant past I've gone through entire jars of almond butter in a very short window of time, oops. Feeling lighter and so much more satisfied on good hearty food and no binges, it feels so great to say that too.
                primal journal - the book of meatabix / food pr0n

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                • #23
                  whole30 day 4

                  I'm taking online classes and working full time, easily the stupidest decision I've ever made! I have way too much homework to finish tonight, by 4am. Admittedly, I have procrastinated. But even still, Friday due dates are the worst. So I'll try to make this relatively quick and then chug some coffee (I know, I know. grad school. do not ever fall for it.)

                  Yesterday:
                  12 oz coffee
                  chicken sausage link
                  tuna with half an avocado, celery, and olives -- avocado is a fantastic replacement for mayo!!!
                  and then there was this: my boyfriend wanted to go out to dinner. It's this restaurant that is all farm to table, house-cured meats and bacon; so I agreed, got a goat burger "slider" but it came with pastured goat cheese and pastured goat bacon. I ate everything but the bun. pastured goat cheese from a local farm, in my opinion and budget, is whole 30
                  and I also had octopus wrapped in bacon.
                  drool:
                  030311..jpg


                  today:
                  12oz coffee
                  leftover beef stew
                  1/2 an avocado
                  a "cutie" mandarin - I've been avoiding fruit, but the sugar in this helped my mood and energy x8333039990293.2, seriously.
                  chicken sausage link
                  dinner was ground grassfed beef scrambled with onions, mushrooms,celery, & jalapeno; over shredded cauliflower cooked in coconut butter with jalapeno. GREAT SUCCESS. I was so hungry that I didn't get a picture!

                  I've been snacking on carrots, hard boiled eggs, and I plead the fifth to some awesome pork rinds we can get at the mexican grocery down the street. they're legit, no oil, just pig fat.

                  I don't know...I'm not going to get so picky about pork, or snacking on good things, I guess. I don't have a problem binging on pork or carrots or anything. I have problems with fruit, dairy, nuts...things I haven't touched in 4 days. The bottom line here is: I am satisfied. I am not binging. My little fitday pie graph looks great. If I can keep this up for thirty days (and I do feel very set on doing so!) I feel like I will have fixed myself.
                  primal journal - the book of meatabix / food pr0n

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                  • #24
                    I did not get to sleep until about 4:30, and then woke up at 9:30. I should be in bed now but...
                    yeah.

                    I walked to the farmer's market and got some avocados, broccoli, duck eggs & quail eggs then to the mexican grocery and got a ton of produce for $11. Walked back home, ate one of the duck eggs, a sauasage, regular egg, some avocado, and shredded cauliflower with mushrooms and chayote squash.
                    030511breakfast..jpg
                    and that was brunchathon!

                    My goal for today was to get my extra room cleaned up at least enough so that I could work out in there. Done. Got rid of a lot of stuff, dug out the dumbbells, still have to put clothes away but I can see floor! lol

                    Spent a lot of the day hanging out with the cats in the back yard. It was close to 80 degrees today! Didn't get much homework done but did attempt pull ups - we'd moved the bar outside on the porch a while ago and I haven't been working on pull ups since. I can do three in a row, assisted. I think I was up to 8 in a row assisted at one point. 3 is not too terrible, I guess.

                    Snack was more avocado and some olives, later snack was 2 pieces of nitrite free canadian bacon. and..carrots.

                    Dinner was this recipe, but modified with coconut oil instead of olive, added jalapeno, and added cilantro. We also had more chayote and some broccoli. I think the trick to using coconut oil all the time is to use a lot of other spices - hardly could even tell it was coconut oil. I wanted to get lard at the mexican grocery but all of them were marked "packed on 2/19, use by 2/23" and we've had some sketchy food poisoning type issues from that place before, so noooo way did i want to try their rancid lard! Forgot to get celery so I snacked on carrots again, and while they're not making me binge, they're a lot of carbs in comparison with the rest of the day. Celery tomorrow!

                    I'm feeling kind of blah and realizing I just not only made it through a Saturday without binging but also cleaned the whole house, including the messy spare room of doom! Saturdays have traditionally been reserved for binging and then self loathing. I caught myself thinking that way and went into the now-clean-ish spare room and did some presses, deadlifts & squats with 40#. Feels infinitely better. Really really need to get some sleep now, though!

                    this made my day, too:
                    C360_2011-03-05 11-&.jpg
                    caminar más / walk more!
                    primal journal - the book of meatabix / food pr0n

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                    • #25
                      today:

                      7.8 miles of walking

                      hard boiled egg, some olives
                      beef shawarma (just a whole plate of meat. it was fabulous.) + salad with olive oil
                      leftover beef scramble with added cabbage, broccoli, carrots
                      snacked on carrots, celery sundried tomato, & a chicken sausage

                      so I may not be doing perfectly evangelical whole30 (chicken sausage and I do great together) but I'm doing great with this and despite wanting to do nothing but eat a platter of chocolate chip cookies for a short time today, I kept it up. I really want to see how I feel (ok, and look) after the 30 days are up, and I've told enough people about this that I need to hold myself accountable for the whole duration. Today got a little hard, but I just kept telling the little whiny "but I want...." voice in my head that this is just 30 days; not even thirty more days at this point! can do this. will do this.

                      Sore from the lifting yesterday. Tired because I'm 7 hours behind on sleep. Going to go work on that now!
                      primal journal - the book of meatabix / food pr0n

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                      • #26
                        I think "cheating" on chicken sausage isn't exactly the worst thing in the world.. Seems like you're doing really good! I guess it's one week into the challenge now? Same for me (not so strict, though). Good luck!

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                        • #27
                          the octopus wrapped in bacon looks delicious!

                          I killed my Whole 30 attempt last night when I ate a Mars Bar. Something about the Whole 30, rather than 'Primal', makes me feel restricted and sort of stressed, like 'am I going to mess this up?' (and then I did.). ugh. anyway, mini-vent.

                          Your weightlifitng routine sounds good, and your food looks delicious and nutritious! Seems like you're doing well!
                          Life consists with wildness. The most alive is the wildest. (Thoreau)

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                          • #28
                            Originally posted by fable View Post
                            I think "cheating" on chicken sausage isn't exactly the worst thing in the world.. Seems like you're doing really good! I guess it's one week into the challenge now? Same for me (not so strict, though). Good luck!
                            ohh, I know. One of the packs of sausage that I got has sugar in it, but no carbs, and I didn't notice it. I should probably just continue to "not notice it" and munch happily! thanks for the good luck - still going well, crossing my fingers!

                            Originally posted by sibylsybil View Post
                            the octopus wrapped in bacon looks delicious!

                            I killed my Whole 30 attempt last night when I ate a Mars Bar. Something about the Whole 30, rather than 'Primal', makes me feel restricted and sort of stressed, like 'am I going to mess this up?' (and then I did.). ugh. anyway, mini-vent.

                            Your weightlifitng routine sounds good, and your food looks delicious and nutritious! Seems like you're doing well!
                            sibyl, thanks! the bacon wrapped octopus - oh my god, I could eat it every night! I posted in your journal about the mars bar - don't be too hard on yourself! you're doing great
                            primal journal - the book of meatabix / food pr0n

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                            • #29
                              day 7. i want butter. i want nuts. i want to gorge on many things. to paraphrase robb wolf, cocaine and hookers would be a good time...doesn't mean it's a good thing to do!

                              almost 1/4 through, doesn't quite feel like it's been that long and surprisingly i'm not getting too sick of cooking. i do need to get some lard or palm oil - the coconut oil is, as predicted, wearing on me...spicy or not, it's still very coconut! i definitely think it's helping to have a lot of variety and try to do something at least a little different every night. i cannot speak highly enough about the CSA box, for this purpose.

                              i am still sore from lifting on saturday night! but since i walked so much yesterday, today is a rest day...which worked out very nicely because it was drizzling constantly all day - didn't make walking impossible but just very irritating.
                              i actually got excited about the next time i do get to lift, while sitting at work today. it's a nice feeling.

                              food today was:
                              24 oz coffee, 3 tbsp coconut milk, cinnamon
                              chicken sausage! 1 link, maybe another for snack tonight
                              can of tuna with half a small avocado, celery, boiled egg, a couple olives, and some lemon juice. plus some of the extra mahi mahi from a few nights ago.
                              snacked on celery and carrots and sundried tomato and some pastrami
                              pork chops and some veggies, with about 1/4 of a turnip:
                              030711..jpg

                              the pork chop recipe is here

                              mildly non-whole30: used 1/2 coconut oil 1/2 bacon grease to cook dinner. pastrami has honey in it.
                              i'm not going to obsess over it. or the carbs in the carrots. or the sundried tomato. not yet, anyway.

                              i'm feeling overwhelmed by information. my fault, read too much about too many different macronutrients and adrenal/thyroid issues. step two: keep eating whole foods, don't look back, just keep going, dammit!

                              nonetheless
                              fitday says, average for the week:
                              fat 52%
                              protein 25%
                              carbs 13%

                              i'm still confused about whether i should try for more fat or more protein, or whether i should just not care and see what happens. the only thing i'm worried about is i'm fairly certain i probably have some kind of metabolic derangement; i've done so much crap to this poor old bag of chub body...it just doesn't respond like it used to. so more reading and maybe i'll worry more about the math after the whole 30.

                              otherwise feeling pretty good and seeing some small changes in my body. it has really helped to have food packed for work, and not trying to rely on the convenience store food they peddle at work.
                              primal journal - the book of meatabix / food pr0n

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                              • #30
                                work was good today. i make a lot of things up in my head, unintentionally...there's not much communication going on ever, so between communication, my head gets paranoid. everything is fine. so i guess i won't drop out of library school yet

                                today i had coffee with coconut milk (cannot stand coconut milk anymore.), sausage link and a little piece of leftover pork chop, salmon salad (same combo as yesterday's tuna, plus the leftover fish), pastrami, carrots & celery & sundried tomato.

                                when i got home i walked to the store to get eggs & pork rinds (sshhhhhhhhh they are just fat and salt! made right there in the store) promptly ate 600 calories of pork rinds. and right after that lifted weights. overhead presses, rows, squats, deadlifts; all 40#
                                and then ...
                                ...tonight was my brain telling me CARBS, WOMAN. or maybe just calories? there should also be sleep in here.
                                for dinner i ate 5 eggs, 2 sausage links, and a bunch of cooked cabbage.
                                AND THEN i ate a cherimoya, 3 clementines, some dried cherries and dried blueberries and coconut, and an apple. i have been going very low on the carbs and it just wasn't cutting it tonight.

                                not worried. a little bloaty. all of it was paleo, and my percentage of overall carbohydrates was still not ridiculous. i am not going to overlook the hour of walking and the half hour of weight lifting, these things need fueled.

                                aside from everything else my clothes are definitely fitting better and unless i'm seeing things, the amount of cellulite is slowly diminishing. i approve of this!

                                i'm reading about adrenals and going to cut out coffee again. it is the only thing that gets me through the morning and if my adrenals are shot, i should be replacing it with a meal and not a coffee-based IF. the coffee is not even close to palatable without cream, anyway!

                                i wish i had not messed up my body with the things i've done to it in the last decade or so but what's done is done, most if it is my fault, some of it was stress that i did not cause, and i'm very certain that doing this whole 30, even if i "eat too much," is a huge step in the right direction to fixing up the mess. i'm not going to give up just because it's slow progress, because giving up over slow progress is how i got here in the first place..
                                primal journal - the book of meatabix / food pr0n

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