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  • Get in bed with your farmer and tell him you are giving yourself permission to let it go for at least 30 minutes. Tell him his job is to just hold you and pat your back. Sometimes I need to have DH do the same.
    Female 55
    Starting wt: 198, Goal: 135, Current with PB: 165
    Started at a size 16 down to loose 10

    With PB my asthma has improved, low back pain is gone, & I've got more energy

    My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread60175.html

    Comment


    • Monday
      I took Surfer Son to our family Dr and we got a Mono blood test done. It's a small place, so it will be a couple of days for results.

      I organized my Prop book for the upcoming play. I made some cream cheese clouds and creamed coconut/macadamia nut butter hearts and started supper early because play practice was from 4-6 and then I had band practice from 7-9.

      Both practices went well. I "shared" Surfer Son's story with my band members. My eyes felt a little moist while I was talking about it, but not enough to "worry" about.

      Hmm, I know it's there. It's going to come out soon. Hopefully I'll be able to "control" when and where...

      Foods
      Chai
      Left over carnitas, guac and salsa
      Cream Cheese Clouds
      Coconut/macadamia heart
      Chili, cabbage salad, thin slice of dried mango
      Chai
      Pistachios (I may be eating too many of these)
      "Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." Kurt Vonnegut
      "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." Douglas Adams
      "Moderation sucks." Suse
      "Wine is a vegetable." Meaty
      "Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow and the day after that." Cmdr Chris Hadfield


      Winencandy

      Comment


      • Originally posted by Pedidoc View Post
        Get in bed with your farmer and tell him you are giving yourself permission to let it go for at least 30 minutes. Tell him his job is to just hold you and pat your back. Sometimes I need to have DH do the same.
        Thanks. Reading this brought tears to my eyes. It might be what I need.
        "Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." Kurt Vonnegut
        "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." Douglas Adams
        "Moderation sucks." Suse
        "Wine is a vegetable." Meaty
        "Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow and the day after that." Cmdr Chris Hadfield


        Winencandy

        Comment


        • NP prescription: Do it or you are going to get sick from holding it in........
          Female 55
          Starting wt: 198, Goal: 135, Current with PB: 165
          Started at a size 16 down to loose 10

          With PB my asthma has improved, low back pain is gone, & I've got more energy

          My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread60175.html

          Comment


          • Originally posted by Pedidoc View Post
            NP prescription: Do it or you are going to get sick from holding it in........
            And this RN concurs with the NP prescription.
            My musings

            The old stuff

            Comment


            • Originally posted by Pedidoc View Post
              NP prescription: Do it or you are going to get sick from holding it in........
              Originally posted by Greensprout View Post
              And this RN concurs with the NP prescription.
              I know.

              Didn't happen last night.

              I think it will be soon.
              "Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." Kurt Vonnegut
              "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." Douglas Adams
              "Moderation sucks." Suse
              "Wine is a vegetable." Meaty
              "Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow and the day after that." Cmdr Chris Hadfield


              Winencandy

              Comment


              • FWIW: When I have something I need to get out and it just doesn't happen and I know there will be consequences if I don't get resolution, I help things along by watching or listening to something that I know will trigger strong emotion. The end of "A Christmas Carol." Some animal videos. Looking at pics of loved ones who are no longer on this earth. Stuff like that. Actually it is quite therapeutic to do this periodically, kind of clean up the corners where things accumulate, the dust bunnies of the mind.
                My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                Comment


                • Note from this respiratory therapist: Crying is hell on the airways, all sorts of swelling and whatnot. So you might think about some nice deep breathing exercises and maybe use a neti pot or other sinus cleansing method afterwards. Treat yourself to a facial.
                  My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

                  "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

                  Comment


                  • I've been off the forums for a few weeks and just read what happened to Surfer Son! You must have been (and still be) so worried!!! I'm happy he's home safely now!

                    Big hugs (from across the ocean).
                    My Journal: Candy in Primal Wonderland
                    My Blog: Candy in Wonderland
                    Goal for 2012: keep weight steady (+/- 74 kg): check
                    Goal for 2013: lose 10 kg and keep new weight (+/- 65 kg)

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by Siobhan View Post
                      FWIW: When I have something I need to get out and it just doesn't happen and I know there will be consequences if I don't get resolution, I help things along by watching or listening to something that I know will trigger strong emotion. The end of "A Christmas Carol." Some animal videos. Looking at pics of loved ones who are no longer on this earth. Stuff like that. Actually it is quite therapeutic to do this periodically, kind of clean up the corners where things accumulate, the dust bunnies of the mind.
                      I think I might need a "trigger", but a big part of me thinks "if my own son almost dying didn't trigger it, but a sappy movie does, what kind of a mother does that make me?? This is the same part of me that wonders WHY I didn't break down sooner. I mean, usually I can cry at the tiniest thing...

                      Was this just "too big"???

                      Funny how I can "talk" about these fears/thoughts here, but I haven't talked about it to anyone at home.

                      Originally posted by Siobhan View Post
                      Note from this respiratory therapist: Crying is hell on the airways, all sorts of swelling and whatnot. So you might think about some nice deep breathing exercises and maybe use a neti pot or other sinus cleansing method afterwards. Treat yourself to a facial.
                      Yeah I'm not looking forward to the physical after effects of crying.

                      Originally posted by Candy in Wonderland View Post
                      I've been off the forums for a few weeks and just read what happened to Surfer Son! You must have been (and still be) so worried!!! I'm happy he's home safely now!

                      Big hugs (from across the ocean).
                      Thank you Candy
                      "Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." Kurt Vonnegut
                      "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." Douglas Adams
                      "Moderation sucks." Suse
                      "Wine is a vegetable." Meaty
                      "Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow and the day after that." Cmdr Chris Hadfield


                      Winencandy

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by winencandy View Post
                        I think I might need a "trigger", but a big part of me thinks "if my own son almost dying didn't trigger it, but a sappy movie does, what kind of a mother does that make me?? This is the same part of me that wonders WHY I didn't break down sooner. I mean, usually I can cry at the tiniest thing...)
                        I think as moms that when its something big with our kids we hold it together for so long that we need a "trigger" to make us let go. It's okay to cry over the "trigger" but we can't loose it with our kids. So no, it does NOT make you a bad mom!
                        Female 55
                        Starting wt: 198, Goal: 135, Current with PB: 165
                        Started at a size 16 down to loose 10

                        With PB my asthma has improved, low back pain is gone, & I've got more energy

                        My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread60175.html

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by winencandy View Post
                          I think I might need a "trigger", but a big part of me thinks "if my own son almost dying didn't trigger it, but a sappy movie does, what kind of a mother does that make me?? This is the same part of me that wonders WHY I didn't break down sooner. I mean, usually I can cry at the tiniest thing...

                          Was this just "too big"???
                          No, no, no.

                          Everybody else needed you to be strong, and take charge, and you stepped up. That's what moms do. And you did it well. Now that the worst is over, take the time to process it. As was already said, give yourself the time, and it will happen. You need this. Doesn't have to be a bawling, wailing event, but something to purge the held in emotions.

                          Originally posted by winencandy View Post
                          Funny how I can "talk" about these fears/thoughts here, but I haven't talked about it to anyone at home.
                          I wouldn't be surprised if your Farmer is going through the same things in his own head. Being stoic and in control cuz that's what dads are supposed to be like. If you open up to him, you may find it cathartic for the both of you. At a safe time and place, like cuddled up together alone. Scroll back up and re-read Pedidoc's prescription.
                          My musings

                          The old stuff

                          Comment


                          • ONE WEEK TOMORROW!!!!

                            Tuesday
                            I taught my Home Instruction Student this morning. How refreshing to teach someone who wants to learn! We are doing short stories and just finished "The Sniper".

                            I was finished at 11, so of course, I went into London to do some shopping 'cause I have a TRIP coming up!!

                            I bought 2 pairs of jeans, a pair of rubber shoes, (but I will probably return them), seriously looked at a better pair of Clarks waterproof shoes (not sure about the laces, on line I found these, that I might like better. Or even these, although they are not waterproof - yes, I have a shoe/boot"problem"), several kinds of nuts (I want to try the Caveman Crunch), some tea, more macadamia nut butter, some Lara Bars (for the trip), some MCT oil and digestive enzymes, some Salmon Oil for the Butterflies dry itchy skin, a between the legs memory foam pillow (for my back), some AG re:coil for my curls, umm, oh, yeah, a couple of dog toys

                            I think that's everything

                            I got home shortly after the rain started. Which changed to ice, and now it's windy with huge wet snowflakes. If I get a supply job tomorrow morning, I will decline.

                            Foods
                            Walnut Oil shot
                            Chai
                            A small wedge of double cream Brie from the grocery store and 2 cream cheese clouds (nibbled on through the afternoon)
                            a few pistachios, 3 Brazil nuts
                            sausage, hashbrowns, baked beans, fried mushrooms and 5 olives
                            Coconut heart

                            Another Sticker day!!
                            Last edited by winencandy; 02-26-2013, 08:36 PM. Reason: added links
                            "Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." Kurt Vonnegut
                            "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." Douglas Adams
                            "Moderation sucks." Suse
                            "Wine is a vegetable." Meaty
                            "Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow and the day after that." Cmdr Chris Hadfield


                            Winencandy

                            Comment


                            • Thank you ladies
                              I know you are right. It will happen. Soon. As soon as I give myself permission to.
                              I may need to be alone.

                              I mentioned last night to my Farmer that I might be ready to break down soon, to "deal" with it, and that if he was around I'd just need him to hold me. He said he's pretty much finished working through and dealing with it. (or something like that)
                              Last edited by winencandy; 02-26-2013, 08:37 PM.
                              "Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." Kurt Vonnegut
                              "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." Douglas Adams
                              "Moderation sucks." Suse
                              "Wine is a vegetable." Meaty
                              "Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow and the day after that." Cmdr Chris Hadfield


                              Winencandy

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by winencandy View Post
                                I mentioned last night to my Farmer that I might be ready to break down soon, to "deal" with it, and that if he was around I'd just need him to hold me. He said he's pretty much finished working through and dealing with it. (or something like that)
                                Great! He's in the perfect place to hold you. MEN - they are sooooo clueless sometimes!
                                Female 55
                                Starting wt: 198, Goal: 135, Current with PB: 165
                                Started at a size 16 down to loose 10

                                With PB my asthma has improved, low back pain is gone, & I've got more energy

                                My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread60175.html

                                Comment

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