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Bizarre Fitness Videos?

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  • Bizarre Fitness Videos?

    I was sifting through fitness videos online and I can't believe how ridiculous some are.
    This one especially: http://www.surfergirlworkout.com/

    If you watch the video on their site you will be able to see why I felt like laughing and crying at the same time when I got it.
    These girls look like they're going to break with 1 pound weights. Even though the lead girl, Amber something, looks cheery and peppy her voice remains monotonous, save for some giggles, throughout the whole workout.
    I couldn't even bring myself to start it. I just stood there in disbelief.

    My favourite part of the video is at the end when she says... "I can't think..................(of a better reason)". I also enjoy the vacant stares of the other girls (who never utter a sound).

    In staggering contrast: the Tahitian girl WHO TALKS IN CAPS!!!!!!!!!!! and her loyal group of hoola dancers. Well, I must admit, these girls have killer abs (though I doubt it's indicative of the effectiveness of the workout). It does look like fun. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8b_bqYVmueU

    I also think BodyRock is soft core porn that tries to pass as a fitness workout but I know I will be skewered by some of the guys here :3
    I did try to do some of her exercises, but was distracted by the moaning and the ass/ cleavage zooms. For about 30% of the workout all I could see is boobs and I wasn't sure what the right form was (on the knees? in the nude? what? Don't know if that's a publicity strategy or just the bf's/ camera man's "angle".

    Then there's the celebrity workouts that swear they're different than all other "no-name" cardio workouts, and that following the workout 3 times a week for 16 years you'll look exactly like the celebrity of your choice: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlAauC4EFrA

    And last and least, my favourite: the notion that if you have some beefed up dude yelling at you with corny techno music in the background you're somehow increasing the intensity of your excruciatingly boring cardio routine.

    All that's left are guru Tony Horton and martial arts workouts from the 80s (which I love!)

    Do you have anything ridiculous to add to the list?
    "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
    -Raymond Peat, PhD

  • #2
    I don't have much to add by way of ridiculous workout videos, but you did make me laugh with the BodyRock stuff...heheheh
    Ramblings of an Unamused Mouse (Lots of Food Porn, Too!)

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    • #3
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dUu1qyH5j34

      country line dancing aerobics :-?

      no, this is better-
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VgyxB...eature=related
      Last edited by bloodorchid; 10-23-2010, 05:56 PM.
      beautiful
      yeah you are

      Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
      lol

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      • #4
        Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dUu1qyH5j34

        country line dancing aerobics :-?
        I can't tell where this workout falls? Cardio or...? Moving (very) slowly? I'm sure this is a staple in some Southern old folks' home.

        Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
        OMG! Hahaha! That is better! Those are the whitest hip-hop dancers I've ever seen.
        I love the dance routine moves!
        "pigeon. window washer. baaaaaaasketbaaaaall", combining cardio with another great sport: scrabble.
        "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
        -Raymond Peat, PhD

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        • #5
          Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
          Oh man, that is hilarious. Now I've got to go practice the "Roger Rabbit."

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          • #6
            HAHAHAHA!

            https://shakeweight.com/flare/next

            Okay, should I state the obvious here?... the benefits of the shaker can be obtained elsewhere... and for free... in fact, some will pay for you to exercise those arm muscles
            "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
            -Raymond Peat, PhD

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            • #7
              HipHopAbs makes me laugh every time I see it.

              http://www.beachbody.com/product/fit...hip_hop_abs.do

              Just another workout money scam plan.
              Every Day is a New Adventure

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              • #8
                Ok. Just looked at the surfer girl one and DAMN! Those girls need to be set down with BIG plate of food! They are scary skinny and look horrible! They need real food and some heavy stuff to lift so maybe they won't be so scrawny!

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                • #9
                  It's not an instructional video, or even all that bizarre, but this video of Gwenyth Paltrow with her trainer Tracy Anderson is a hilarious and sad distillation of the Conventional Wisdom, Chronic Cardio, Hollywood-Industral Complex mentality.

                  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzUwfNQ8gRc

                  "No woman should lift more than three pounds," because women are meant to be weak and fragile, obviously!

                  "When you're 35, you either starve yourself, or you eat and do serious cardio," because calories in must always equal calories out!
                  My Primal Journal
                  My Twitter

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                  • #10
                    *mouth agape with deer-caught-in-the-headlights stare*

                    Um. Okay.

                    Does anyone want to go on a hike? Carry some heavy things?

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                    • #11
                      i can't, i carried some bags of groceries in and i got bulky
                      beautiful
                      yeah you are

                      Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                      lol

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                      • #12
                        ha ha hah ahahahha

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by bloodorchid View Post
                          i can't, i carried some bags of groceries in and i got bulky
                          Haha!

                          This skinny disease is so prevalent in Montreal, I don't think I've seen a man who looks like he lifted anything heavier than a pencil.
                          They all wear skinny jeans, are short, scarily skinny and wear scarfs (wtf?). There's probably a correlation to the staggering number of Vegetarian restaurants :/

                          Don't get me started on the chicks. I'm 5lb over my "ideal" BMI weight, and I'm almost always the heaviest girl in my classes

                          Unless a Primal man moves to Montreal any time soon, I'm gonna have to get a bf I can beat at arm wrestling
                          "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
                          -Raymond Peat, PhD

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                          • #14
                            Lololol on Kim Kardasian's sneaker/motocross boot hybrid footgear!
                            sigpicI'm not old, I'm Vintage!

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                            • #15
                              No woman should work out wit more than 3 pound? WTF? Even Jillian 'wants to be a fitness trainer' Michaels knows better than that
                              sigpicI'm not old, I'm Vintage!

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