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The Sisson Spoof

Posted By Mark Sisson On February 8, 2007 @ 2:11 pm In Hype,Nutrition,Raising Healthy Children | Comments Disabled

Diabetes goes portable!

Introducing Crispy Cones [7], the new portable obesity device hitting food courts everywhere.

I have to admit I’m baffled by the Crispy Cone website. Usually new food products don’t try to make a claim of health if they are obviously junk (processed meat, cheese and empty carbs? Come on!!!). I can cut “borderline” healthy foods like veggie wraps and Cesar salads a break. At least Tacone wraps are better than burgers. But this product is just ridiculous. Crispy cones are basically pizza and tacos in new packaging. And what packaging – processed, hydrogenated bleached flour!

The makers rave about the convenience, and boy do they brag about the no-drip capability of their patented (ooooh) cone. They even point out that hand-held food is – yes – environmentally-friendly. Okay…

When did food stop being a meal and start being something we do while we’re doing other stuff? I’m constantly amazed at how people eat while on the phone, driving, even in meetings. A generation ago, it was considered a pretty horrifying display of bad manners to eat this way, but I guess it’s what we do now. It sure hasn’t made us healthier or slimmer.

The fact that Crispy Cones actually insist on the health of their product is what gets me most. The laugh you will get from the “Go Healthy” tab of the website is worth the click. If this is healthy, God help us!


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