^[3]The Prize:

Unwieldy weight comes in all unwieldy shapes and all unwieldy sizes. Today’s heavy chunk of unwieldiness is call a Sandball ^[3]. Part sandbag, part medicine ball, part kettlebell, good for heaving, swinging, and lugging around. It doesn’t have the wonderful scratch-your-hands-up quality of an actual rock, but you can always scrape your hands over concrete for a few minutes after using this sandball if you really need that “just got home from a long day of bashing my food’s skull in with a rough stone” feel. The winner of today’s contest will receive a blue logo BallBell sandball, courtesy of Alpha Strong ^[4].

The Contest:

What is Primal?

Primal is…

• naming your cat “Sparemeal.”
• never having to say you’re sorry. To a vegan.
• making a bacon sandwich using only one ingredient.
• referring to your toddler as “My little kettlebell.”
• when your eating habits cause a national egg shortage (yes, I’m looking at you, Australians ^[5]).
• refusing to believe a steak smoothie is a bad idea.
• living in Denver and walking to work, in Seattle.
• watching breaking news about a “forest fire” and misunderstanding it to be breaking news about a “large barbecue.”

Get the idea? Write your own in the comments section. I’ll pick a winner.

The Deadline:

Midnight, tonight!

Who is Eligible:

You. You are eligible.

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