Marks Daily Apple
Serving up health and fitness insights (daily, of course) with a side of irreverence.
18 Sep

Contest: Primal is…

ball largeThe Prize:

Unwieldy weight comes in all unwieldy shapes and all unwieldy sizes. Today’s heavy chunk of unwieldiness is call a Sandball. Part sandbag, part medicine ball, part kettlebell, good for heaving, swinging, and lugging around. It doesn’t have the wonderful scratch-your-hands-up quality of an actual rock, but you can always scrape your hands over concrete for a few minutes after using this sandball if you really need that “just got home from a long day of bashing my food’s skull in with a rough stone” feel. The winner of today’s contest will receive a blue logo BallBell sandball, courtesy of Alpha Strong.

The Contest:

What is Primal?

Primal is…

  • naming your cat “Sparemeal.”
  • never having to say you’re sorry. To a vegan.
  • making a bacon sandwich using only one ingredient.
  • referring to your toddler as “My little kettlebell.”
  • when your eating habits cause a national egg shortage (yes, I’m looking at you, Australians).
  • refusing to believe a steak smoothie is a bad idea.
  • living in Denver and walking to work, in Seattle.
  • watching breaking news about a “forest fire” and misunderstanding it to be breaking news about a “large barbecue.”

Get the idea? Write your own in the comments section. I’ll pick a winner.

The Deadline:

Midnight, tonight!

Who is Eligible:

You. You are eligible.

You want comments? We got comments:

Imagine you’re George Clooney. Take a moment to admire your grooming and wit. Okay, now imagine someone walks up to you and asks, “What’s your name?” You say, “I’m George Clooney.” Or maybe you say, “I’m the Clooninator!” You don’t say “I’m George of George Clooney Sells Movies Blog” and you certainly don’t say, “I’m Clooney Weight Loss Plan”. So while spam is technically meat, it ain’t anywhere near Primal. Please nickname yourself something your friends would call you.

  1. …weight loss for smarties.

    …going against the grain.

    Elissa wrote on September 18th, 2010
    • I *love* “going against the grain!” That’s awesome. Double meaning! :)

      gilliebean wrote on September 18th, 2010
    • going against the grain!
      – love the fun and oh so true, play on words!

      Shelley C wrote on September 18th, 2010
    • Brilliant!

      Patty wrote on September 19th, 2010
  2. …wishing for the opportunity to wrestle a bear

    Primalrob wrote on September 18th, 2010
  3. …. Drinking the leftover meat juice in the pan.

    Russell Taylor wrote on September 18th, 2010
  4. Having A Good Time, Going Against CW, That Is Primal Life.

    Primal Poetry :-D

    Andy B wrote on September 18th, 2010
  5. … taking pains to avoid having pains.

    … lifting, leaping, running, creeping, pulling, pushing, squatting and SLEEPING!

    J. Ott wrote on September 18th, 2010
  6. …your high cholesterol relatives visit and have a heart attack over the amount of fat you eat.
    …instead of chocolate for valentines day your spouse gives you a side of bacon.
    …when at youth camp, your kids ask their counselors if they can hunt the deer around the camp instead of having to eat cafeteria food.
    … your idea of “fun” is hunting bunnies in the park.
    … you have to explain to your vegan friends, for the umpteenth time, why you don’t eat “healthy” whole grains.
    … when your kids are over at their friends’ house and they refuse to eat “healthy” food like rice pasta and whole wheat bread.
    … your on a road trip and seriously consider stopping the car just to go hunt the deer on the side of the road.

    ElizaGrok wrote on September 18th, 2010
  7. …my health insurance.

    Sarah Yoshi wrote on September 18th, 2010
  8. … inifinte possibilities …

    Kelda wrote on September 18th, 2010
  9. … lean not mean :-)

    Kelda wrote on September 18th, 2010
  10. …knowing I never have to go jogging again.

    Shebeeste wrote on September 18th, 2010
  11. Primal is making yourself a home-made Baconator (no bun, of course), and proudly proclaiming that you are a “Meat-atarian.”

    Jake wrote on September 18th, 2010
  12. Primal is…

    Having a healthy body, freedom, good intuition and the ability to attract beautiful mates.

    Kyle Matthew Q. Santelices wrote on September 18th, 2010
  13. Ordering a steak with a side of steak

    mattpenney89 wrote on September 18th, 2010
  14. Primal means being so hungry you could eat an entire cow….literally

    Jsnyd wrote on September 18th, 2010
  15. … hiding my jerky stash from the husband and the kids.

    Charlotte wrote on September 18th, 2010
  16. …finishing up your family tree with “grok” at the top.

    Joel wrote on September 18th, 2010
  17. Having an epic to-the-death fantasy fight inside your head of just you and Liger and spear while taking walk through the woods

    Zac wrote on September 18th, 2010
  18. Having my two sons who are 2 and 5 calling them my little Groks when they are in the yard wrestling each other and me or climbing on there jungle gym. Also being a Phys. Ed. teacher I can have all my students do Primal movements in class and calling them my Primal Army. Thats what Primal means to me.

    Terence Flynn wrote on September 18th, 2010
    • good idea on the gym class and primal army

      hiker wrote on September 18th, 2010
  19. …having your PCP ask you “how you did it” when they review your blood work and see your cholesterol has gone waaaaaaaaaaay down without any pharmaceuticals.

    Michele wrote on September 18th, 2010
  20. Primal is…. happiness!

    Michele wrote on September 18th, 2010
  21. …finding out that you can reclaim joy and health in your life at age 50 and rebuilding (almost) all the physical capacity you’ve lost due to poor eating habits and lack of fun and functional exercise!

    ScottMGS wrote on September 18th, 2010
  22. Primal is…
    Checking your recipes to see if you have something for the road kill you just saw.

    Bob Chipp wrote on September 18th, 2010
  23. …gleefully eating the skin off your roasted chickens!

    gilliebean wrote on September 18th, 2010
  24. P-Paleo
    R-Routines
    I-Inevitably
    M-Make
    A-All
    L-Leaner

    Michele wrote on September 18th, 2010
  25. …letting out the inner caveman!

    Dan wrote on September 18th, 2010
  26. Primal is being happy with having nothing. Knowing you don’t need any magic pill or shortcuts to be happy and healthy.

    Bryan Barksdale wrote on September 18th, 2010
  27. … your doctor insisting that the lab he uses is incompetent because your last three cholesterol panels cannot possibly improve this much going off statin therapy and eating such high saturated fat while doing minimal exercise.

    Asturian wrote on September 18th, 2010
    • :)

      Casey wrote on September 18th, 2010
  28. Primal is…

    letting your body cure itself by using primal foods, exercise, and adequate sleep.

    hiker wrote on September 18th, 2010
  29. That’s simple… LIVING THE GOOD LIFE!

    clayberg wrote on September 18th, 2010
  30. Primal is wearing your Vibram Fivefingers out to a nice restaurant because real shoes are prison for your feet!

    True Story! haha

    Johnny wrote on September 18th, 2010
  31. . . . makes having a pet rock cool again.

    Tommy wrote on September 18th, 2010
    • This one made me laugh out loud!

      Michele wrote on September 18th, 2010
  32. …seeing a picture of an actor in People magazine going barefoot to an Emmy party, with an inset shot of his usual Vibrams foot attire, and wondering if he’s one of us.

    Mike T wrote on September 18th, 2010
  33. Primal is….
    thinking of a Wildlife Refuge as a vast untracked wilderness abounding in uncooked game.

    Randy Hagenstein wrote on September 18th, 2010
  34. … 15-minute speed shopping through the produce and meat departments while everyone else has to shop through the remaining 80% of the grocery store.

    Asturian wrote on September 18th, 2010
  35. Primal is wellness in simplicity.

    Alicia wrote on September 18th, 2010
  36. … your neighbors asking if you’re the one who barbecues every evening.

    Asturian wrote on September 18th, 2010
  37. … being fully satisfied from full fat and delicious meals while still remaining healthy and losing/maintaining ideal weight.

    Amarie84 wrote on September 18th, 2010
  38. … not having to count calories or ever feeling starved.

    Asturian wrote on September 18th, 2010
  39. …not shaving your legs because a FemGROK wouldn’t have to!

    Carbzilla wrote on September 18th, 2010
    • …not shaving your armpits because it distracts your mom from the fact that you still “don’t eat anything normal.”

      Jenn wrote on September 18th, 2010
  40. …my wife giving birth to both our children naturally in a birth center and going home that same day…did i mention they were 10 lb 8 oz and 10 lb 12 oz respectively (at birth)…

    …and then not having a Sandball for this week’s WOW so using the nearest heavy object which was our 6 month old, 25 lb son for 50 meter carries.

    Jack wrote on September 18th, 2010

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