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November 28, 2006

The Fuming Fuji Says No to Chocolate Milk!

By Worker Bee

Is This the Fuji? The World May Never Know

The Fuming Fuji is outraged at the marketing of toxic food, especially when it’s aimed at the small fry. This week, the Fuming Fuji has decided to have a serious problem with chocolate milk.

But, Fuming Fuji, you ask, isn’t chocolate milk sometimes the only way to get calcium in a kid?

The Fuming Fuji says no!

The claim: Chocolate milk has all the protein, calcium and vitamins of regular milk, and kids love it!

The catch: Chocolate milk has all the protein, calcium and vitamins of regular milk, plus it’s full of sugar!

The comeback: So it has a little sweetening. At least it’s getting kids to drink their milk, right?

The conclusion:
The Fuming Fuji cannot help those who believe in glorified dessert for tiny tots. Chocolate milk is a very mean thing to give your child. Milk is also mean, though admittedly not as delicious. Chocolate milk: all the fat, hormones and antibiotics of regular milk, plus sugar!

The catchphrase: Cow’s milk is for baby cows. Chocolate cow’s milk is for fat baby cows.

Disclaimer: Mark Sisson and the Worker Bees do not necessarily endorse the views of the Fuming Fuji.

[tags] milk, chocolate milk, dairy, calcium, children, sugar, hormones [/tags]

TAGS:  humor

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9 Comments on "The Fuming Fuji Says No to Chocolate Milk!"


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Stacy Marie
Stacy Marie
8 years 28 days ago
It’s kind of odd that you would say “Cow’s milk is for baby cows,” Fuming Fuji, because somebody just told me that this year after I told him how much I loved milk. (What he said went somewhat like “We are the only mammals that drink the milk of a different species”, something I’d never quite thought deeply about. Really blew my mind!) Thing is, I was raised on cow’s milk, I love it, and I personally believe that, although much higher in fat, milk is more nutritious for one than soda pop. If you think cow’s milk is for… Read more »
8 years 28 days ago

Stacie Marie.

what will become of you? you’ll continue drinking whole, raw milk (just not too much).

we haven’t adapted to most neolithic foods in 10000 years, but milk is somewhat of an exception

there are worse vices.

Stacy Marie
Stacy Marie
8 years 28 days ago

“Whole, raw milk”? Where can you even get that? (This is not a joke. I don’t know if you mean the organic milk they sell at the grocery store, or some mythical tasty drink that’s only available at farmer’s markets, or whatever!)

8 years 27 days ago

what about cats? they drink milk.

7 years 8 days ago

Cats only drink other animals milk because humans feed it to them.

Also many people do not know, kittens after a certain age become lactose intolerant, so milk is not the healthiest drink to feed your cat.

Alos why is Cat written with a C and kitten with a K?


8 years 24 days ago

Stacy Marie – You can find out where to get whole raw milk here:

Stacy Marie
Stacy Marie
8 years 23 days ago

Thanks, Rebecca!

8 years 25 days ago

And haven’t I read somewhere that chocolate hinders the absorption of calcium?

3 years 10 months ago

It’s kind of mean NOT to give your kid milk. It’s the best most nourishing food for children. And what’s wrong with a little chocolate milk EVERY NOW AND THEN> as well as ice cream (homemade) and raw jersey milk or goat milk. Yes, molasses milk is better, though and just as delicious.
Give your kids milk, though, geez.