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Let me introduce myself. My name is Mark Sisson. I’m 63 years young. I live and work in Malibu, California. In a past life I was a professional marathoner and triathlete. Now my life goal is to help 100 million people get healthy. I started this blog in 2006 to empower people to take full responsibility for their own health and enjoyment of life by investigating, discussing, and critically rethinking everything we’ve assumed to be true about health and wellness...

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May 15, 2007

The Fuming Fuji Says No to Chicken Fries!

By Worker Bee
1 Comments

I fume!

The Fuming Fuji is outraged at the marketing of toxic food, especially when it is aimed at the small fry. This week, the Fuming Fuji has decided to have a serious problem with Burger King’s Chicken Fries.

But, Fuming Fuji, you say, kids need protein!

The Fuming Fuji says no!

The claim: Fuji, I just read Mark’s post about protein. He says chicken is healthy. Okay, so it’s not organic and there is a little bit of breading, but isn’t chicken better for kids than a burger?

The catch: If you want to eat food that looks like deep-friend fingers, be Fuji’s guest. But deep-fried reconstituted chicken mixture is not fit for seedling consumption. Who thought of this disturbing meat french fry “food”? Fuji would not even feed it to sworn enemies such as evil Eggo C.E.O. David Mackay, and trust me that is really saying something.

The comeback: Well, I don’t know about your beef, but I know kids love chicken. And finger foods are a smart, convenient idea. The cup fits right in my car’s cup holders and there’s even a little sauce dipper! Besides, I’d rather have my kids eat chicken fries than french fries or candy bars.

The conclusion: That entire statement is just fumable. Chicken fries are no different from french fries, unless you count the rotting dirty modified carcass part! A box of chicken fries has a lot more calories, sugar and fat than a candy bar, so do not fool yourself, finger fan. See for yourself with this chart if you do not believe the Fuji.

The catchphrase: When you find yourself feeding seedlings fried meat sticks from a cup holder, you may have bigger issues to deal with.

Disclaimer: Mark Sisson and the Worker Bees do not necessarily endorse the views of the Fuming Fuji.

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TAGS:  big agra, humor

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1 Comment on "The Fuming Fuji Says No to Chicken Fries!"

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WalterB
WalterB
4 years 5 months ago

I do have to dispute your statement that the chicken strips have more sugar than a candy bar. 2 grams of sugar in a serving is more than in a candy bar!?

On the Gripping Hand, way too much unsaturated fat in the stuff, probably mostly Omega 6.

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