- via Strange New Products
When it comes to water, we really need more options. It’s not enough that we have potable, low-cost drinking water at our convenient disposal. We still can’t seem to appreciate it, let alone drink it. That’s why there’s PUR Flavor Options. With the press of a button, delicious, sugar-free raspberry, peach or strawberry water is yours! Why, how delightful! A flavor cartridge is only 10 dollars and fits conveniently into your existing PUR filtration system. You can enjoy as many as 75 glasses of flavored water. Buy all three for only 30 dollars and enjoy hundreds of glasses of flavored water all month long! Just think how much more water your family will drink now that it’s not boring anymore. Think of the monotonous, life-sucking agony you will avert when you no longer have to drink virtually free, pure, clean water.
You know what else only costs 30 dollars?
Saving the life of an actual child.
One-fifth of the world’s population does not have access to drinkable water.
4,500 children die every day from lack of drinkable water. And over 2 million people die every year because of poor quality water or dehydration. Every seven minutes, a child dies from dehydration.
Here are some water facts. Here are some more. It breaks my heart that we have such a bloated sense of ennui we actually think we deserve things like PUR flavored water. Sure, it’s not “our fault” that pain and suffering exist. And we all need enjoyment and variety. I guess.
But we don’t need bottled water in this country. We don’t really even need filtered water, let alone flavored filtered water. And we don’t need to spend 2 bucks a pop on Ethos Water to help dying children – we need to drink from the tap and send that 2 bucks to Africa. I’m sure the Ethos people are nice and I bet they really enjoy their private jets and yachts, which is wonderful, but we can all do a lot better. We could use a little horrifying.
6/27/07 EDITOR’S UPDATE: Aquafina, bite us.
Manufacturers are making larger car seats to accommodate heavy children.
Restaurants have expanded seating sizes (and so have amusement parks).
Even medical equipment has required super-sizing.
In fact, expanding the sizes of chair, belts, booths, and other common widgets is one of the hottest areas of product development in business right now.
At the current rate, we will achieve 100% child obesity in America by 2044 and 100% total population obesity by 2058.
What does obesity look like in dollars, numbers and lives? Learn why obesity is such a “big” deal.
Restless leg syndrome is “genetic”, researchers tell us. (Technically, the research simply proves that some folks are more susceptible to developing RLS. This is a common thread in genetic research; by no means does that mean the research isn’t inherently valuable. It just means we need to stop blaming our grandparents when we develop diseases that are preventable through smarter lifestyle choices. Your “bad genes” aren’t a license to shirk personal responsibility.)
Restless leg syndrome has to be one of my favorite modern diseases. I could swear it is a profitable invention out of the imagination of our Big Pharma friends – if I didn’t know that the pharmaceutical industry would never do such a thing. Restless leg syndrome occurs overwhelmingly in overweight, inactive individuals. It’s a very logical consequence of an unhealthy lifestyle. In fact, with our tremendous rates of obesity and collective detestation of exercise, it’s a condition that makes perfect sense. It’s entirely preventable, but once again, we’ve manufactured a “disease” and the inevitable accompanying drugs.
I propose: The Invent Your Own Disease Contest
1. Your disease must identify at least one symptom of sedentary behavior, poor diet, weight gain or other unhealthy lifestyle choice. Bonus points for multiple-symptom diseases.
2. Your disease must disappear entirely with exercise, reduced caloric intake and a healthy lifestyle.
3. Your disease must be named after the symptom(s) it represents. It should sound made-up, just like Restless Leg Syndrome. No Latin.
Example: Roll Discomfort Syndrome. This disease is defined by an excessively large stomach roll which creates discomfort when attempting certain physical postures, e.g. curling up in bed, hunching over one’s computer, and leaning over to pick up the cat. There is a genetic component to Roll Discomfort Syndrome. If you have a history of obesity in your family, you may be at risk for Roll Discomfort Syndrome. There are medications to alleviate sensation and discomfort in this area of the body. You do not have to suffer any longer!
Note: there is a neurological component to some cases of RLS that is legitimate and typically unrelated to lifestyle. For example, RLS can afflict those with diabetes, Parkinson’s, anemia, and peripheral neuropathy. That said, addressing the underlying cause will usually alleviate RLS symptoms. But please. The “RLS” drug you see advertised direct-to-consumer on primetime television is not for these folks. This “disease treatment” is a way to make money off two vast and connected public health threats: obesity and inactivity.
P.S. Don’t forget to submit pictures of your fruit bowl to the Bees. A couple that have come in so far look great. Looking forward to seeing yours.
Here are all the 2007 goodies distilled from over 500 posts here at Mark’s Daily Apple. These posts have gotten the most traffic, links, comments and feedback. And they’re our readers’ favorites. Enjoy.
13 Simple, Timeless Kitchen Hacks (Banish Tears, Cuts, Burns, Smells & Stains!)
Top 10 Best & Worst Protein Sources (vegetarians take note)
A Case Against Cardio (from a former mileage king)
The Definitive Guide to Insulin, Blood Sugar & Type 2 Diabetes (and you’ll understand it)
© 2014 Mark's Daily Apple